Burning Shadows

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Burning Shadows Page 12

by Jennifer Anne Davis


  “How many times do I have to tell you not to drop your weapon?” he chided. He stood and offered me his hand. I grabbed hold, and he hoisted me to my feet.

  “I know. I keep forgetting to hang on to it.” My father had taught me how to fight without weapons. Even though using the bo staff came naturally to me, I often times found it easier to fight without it unless I was using my power.

  “The more you practice with it, the better you’ll be at hanging on to it.”

  I nodded, breathing heavily from the exertion of sparring.

  “There’s a, uh…” Anders pointed to my head. “A leaf in your hair.” He reached out and removed it, his fingers trailing along my jawline, sending pleasurable warmth through my body. He smelled of sweat and fire. I longed to wrap my arms around him.

  “Dinner is probably ready,” he said, his voice gruff.

  What was he thinking? Feeling? He abruptly walked away, leaving me alone. What had just happened? All thoughts pertaining to Anders needed to be blocked from my mind. I was engaged to Vidar. Even if he misread the prophesy, and my blood was supposed to mix with Morlet’s, that didn’t mean there was hope for Anders and me. There was no point in thinking of him in any other capacity than friendship. Yet, something about him pulled at my heartstrings. And that scared me more than anything.

  ✧

  The following morning, we left the temple and headed to the edge of the forest where an immense green valley spread out before us as far as the eye could see. We traveled along the edge of the forest, keeping the lush valley to our right. We walked all day without seeing a single person or village. I was beginning to think no one actually lived on this side of the mountains.

  “We need to stop before it gets too dark,” Anders said. “Let’s head deeper into the forest.” He led me away from the valley and between the trees. The temperature rapidly dropped as night encroached. “That looks like a good spot.” Anders pointed up ahead. A kapok tree stood with its large roots protruding from the ground. “Those buttress roots will provide enough shelter for the night.”

  I made a fire while Anders prepared dinner. After eating, he climbed into his bedroll situated next to mine between the roots that formed a small dome. I remained next to the fire, trying to warm myself. I wasn’t ready to sleep just yet. Lying so close to Anders would be difficult. All I wanted to do was snuggle next to him, which would be completely untoward.

  I glanced over at him. His shoulders rose and fell as he lightly snored. I laid my bo staff across my lap, picking off the dried mud splattered on it. My fingers traced the marking at the tip—choice. I squeezed my weapon, covering the engraving. Grei Heks said it would play a part in the battle with Morlet. What choice would I be faced with? Would I make the right decision?

  I touched the medallion around my neck. If only Morlet would tell me more about Linnea. What happened to her after he gained Skog Heks’s magic? How did she die? Was it a coincidence that I had a book with a girl by the same name in it? A book that also hinted at answers? I rubbed my eyes, exhausted from traveling for so many days.

  Anders rolled over, mumbling in his sleep. His relaxed face made him look young and innocent—not at all like a lethal assassin. What sort of life would he have had if the assassin never purchased him from the slave owner?

  Anders’s shoulders jerked, and he made an odd noise. He never had nightmares, so I stood and went between the tree roots, crouching next to him. I gently shook his shoulder, trying to rouse him. His hand whipped out, latching onto my wrist. In one swift motion, he flipped me onto the ground and rolled on top of me, pinning me down.

  “What’s going on?” he demanded, glancing around for danger.

  His precise, quick movements startled me. “You were having a nightmare, so I woke you.”

  “Oh.” He released my arms and moved off me.

  I sat up. “Do you want to talk about it?”

  He lay down, not looking at me. “No.”

  Of course he didn’t. I got up and kicked dirt on the fire, putting it out. When I lay down next to Anders, he turned away from me. The moist, damp dirt smelled of pungent fallen leaves. A buttress root towered on my right side, making me feel small and insignificant. Several crickets chirped nearby.

  “Do you remember what I told you about my family?” Anders asked.

  “Yes.” My voice came out gruff. He had been born into slavery. At the age of ten, he had an altercation with another slave boy. Shortly after that, his owner sold him to an assassin who valued fighting skills. Anders didn’t want to be separated from his family, so he asked the assassin if he would be able to visit them on occasion. The assassin bought Anders’s entire family, lined them up in front of him, and killed them. Just thinking about what Anders was forced to witness and live through made me physically ill.

  “Until Vidar, I had no one. He is my family.”

  “I understand that.” I wondered where he was going with this. He so rarely shared anything personal that I was afraid to move for fear he’d stop talking.

  “I would never hurt him… or anyone I care about.”

  Something was clearly bothering him. Propping myself up on my arm, I asked, “Are you okay?”

  He sighed. “I dreamt that I snuck into an elaborate bedchamber. It… it was the bedchamber of the king and queen of Nelebek.” Anders rolled onto his back, staring up at the night sky. “Armed with two knives, I went over to the bed. You were lying there naked in Vidar’s arms, your legs tangled in soft, yellow silk sheets, a smile on your face. When Vidar looked at me, I smothered him with a pillow and stabbed one of the knives into his heart. You screamed, and I reached out, grabbing your head and snapping your neck. I killed you both, and I felt nothing. Someone had sent me there on an assignment.”

  “It was just a dream,” I assured him, my skin prickling with fear. “You would never hurt Vidar or me. And those days—that part of your life—it’s over. There is nothing to be afraid of.”

  “I hope so,” he whispered. “But the truth is, I’m an assassin. A monster. I’ve killed hundreds of people—just like Morlet. I’m no better than he is.”

  “Don’t you dare compare yourself to him. You’re nothing alike.”

  “How can you say that?” he asked. “When we first met, you couldn’t stand to be near me.”

  “That was before I knew you.” I reached out and took hold of his hand. He tried pulling it away, but I clasped it tighter, refusing to let go. “You’re a good man and have made up for the crimes you’ve committed.”

  “What if when this is all over and the curse is lifted, I go back to being a ruthless assassin?”

  “That won’t happen. You’re not that person anymore.”

  “How do you know?”

  “Because you’re helping Vidar.”

  He bitterly laughed. “After I killed Vidar’s parents, Grei Heks cast a spell binding me to him, so I couldn’t harm him in any way. I have to keep him safe and do as he commands. If he orders me to dispose of a spy, I do it. If he tells me to jump, I jump. I’m not entirely me. There are things I wish I could do, but I can’t.”

  Releasing his hand, I reached out and touched the side of his face. Being so close to him felt forbidden. Yet, I wanted to wash away his pain, be his friend, and understand him better. “You are entirely you—a good, decent person who cares about his friends and helping others. When Morlet is killed and the curse ends, not only will Vidar ascend to the throne, but you’ll also still be there by his side because he is your family—your friend. Not because the curse commands you to.”

  He turned toward me and reached up, pulling my hand away from his face. “I don’t know about staying in Nelebek. I don’t think I’ll be able to stand by and watch…” He cleared his throat. “I’ll need to return to my own kingdom to see the state of things.”

  He couldn’t leave. He belonged with the Krigers. With me.

  “Your hand is shaking,” Anders murmured, still holding onto it. “Are you cold?”

&
nbsp; I couldn’t keep my feelings from him any longer. He deserved to hear the truth. “Being with Vidar feels wrong,” I blurted before I could change my mind.

  “Kaia, the alternative is unimaginable.”

  With my free hand, I covered his lips, not wanting to talk about Morlet. This wasn’t about him. “When I’m with you, it feels right.” The words hung in the air between us. What would he say? How would he react to my confession? I couldn’t take it back.

  He reached out and pulled my body on top of his. Our faces were so close. His brown eyes blazed. I leaned down to kiss him.

  Anders abruptly shoved me away, and I fell on my bottom, stunned. “I’m sorry,” he said, his eyes wide with horror. He scrambled to his feet and ran away from me.

  “Where are you going?” I called after him. He didn’t stop.

  What just happened? I curled my knees up to my chest as tears filled my eyes. It had been stupid to reveal my feelings for him. He obviously didn’t care for me the same way.

  The moonlight caught on the tip of my bo staff. The weapon leaned against the tree roots, the engraving flashing. We all had choices. And Anders didn’t choose me.

  ✧

  I woke up at dawn, Anders nowhere in sight. A thin fog blanketed the land. After packing my bedroll in my sack, I went through my forms with my bo staff, trying to warm myself up. I decided to give Anders an hour to return. If he didn’t, I’d continue without him. Berg was to the south, and the three lakes converged beyond that.

  Leaves rustled behind me, and I spun around, angling my weapon toward the intruder.

  “I’m sorry,” Anders said. “For my behavior last night and running away.” He had dark circles under his eyes. He must not have slept very well.

  “Whatever.” I lowered my weapon. “Let’s be on our way. We can’t afford to waste any more time.” I didn’t want to talk about what happened between us last night. It was easier to ignore it rather than face the fact that I’d scared Anders off by admitting my feelings for him. It had been a stupid move on my part. I shouldered my sack and attached my bo staff to it.

  Anders came closer to me, trying to get me to look in his eyes. “You have to understand that not only am I bound to Vidar, but I’ve also lost everyone I love.”

  I glanced at him. “You’ve already told me.” Since he didn’t age, he chose not to become close with anyone besides Vidar, so he wouldn’t suffer the loss once they grew old and passed away. “My father died. He was all I had.” It didn’t mean I was going to wall myself off from other people. Pain was part of life. I turned away from him and started walking south.

  A few minutes later, pebbles crunched behind me as Anders caught up.

  “Have you ever considered the possibility that once the curse is lifted, Vidar and I will be our natural age—well over a hundred years old—and we’ll both die? Maybe Grei Heks cast the curse the way she did because it was the only way to ensure an heir?”

  I continued walking, mulling over what he said. If that were the case, I’d be stuck in the capital regardless of whether Vidar and I married or not. Either scenario made my child the future ruler of Nelebek. I rubbed my temples, feeling a headache coming on.

  “Kaia, did you hear me?”

  “Vidar thinks the two of you will simply start aging once the curse is lifted.”

  “That’s another possibility. We don’t know for sure. All I’m trying to say is that I’m sorry.”

  I hoisted my sack higher and kept walking, wanting this conversation to be over.

  “I’d like to be your friend,” he softly said.

  He’d told me as much in the cave after we rescued the Krigers. It was my own fault for pushing the matter. For thinking there was something between us. He’d made it perfectly clear I was engaged to Vidar—his best friend—and he wanted nothing more than friendship.

  Ignoring him, I kept on walking, not once looking back.

  ✧

  Standing beside Anders at the edge of the forest, I observed the small town before us. We’d been walking south along the valley of Berg for about a week now. This was the first town we’d come across. It was only a few blocks wide with a handful of farms around the perimeter. People milled about, but I didn’t see any soldats standing around.

  “Let’s go into the town. See if there’s anything worth investigating. Maybe there’s an inn. What do you think?” Anders asked.

  “I could use a warm bed.” My back ached from sleeping on the rocky ground for so many nights.

  “About before,” Anders began.

  “Don’t,” I said. “We’re good.” He had tried bringing up the incident or apologizing at least a dozen times over the past week. I evaded him every time.

  He stared at me a moment before nodding. “People will probably wonder why you’re wearing pants.”

  I rolled my eyes. If this were the capital, no one would even notice my pants, let alone think there was anything wrong with a girl wearing them. “Surely no one expects a woman to travel in a dress.”

  “All I’m saying is to be prepared for a few stares or even someone asking.” We headed toward the small town.

  “If there’s an inn, it’ll be in the center,” Anders said as we approached the outlying buildings.

  A couple walked by, smiling at us. We passed a man pulling a small wagon.

  After two blocks, a wooden sign up ahead read—Inn. The three-story building had several front-facing windows with curtains. A few even had a vase of flowers sitting on the ledges. It seemed like a respectable establishment. After climbing the front steps, Anders and I entered the inn. The first floor contained a large room with a dozen or so tables. A serving wench set a mug of ale down before the only customer in the room.

  An elderly man wearing an apron walked out from the kitchen. “Can I help you two?” he asked.

  “We’d like to buy two warm meals,” Anders said.

  “Sit anywhere you like. I’ll bring you some stew.”

  “Do you have any rooms available for the night?” I inquired.

  The man glanced from Anders to me. “Where did you say you are traveling to?”

  “We didn’t,” Anders answered.

  The man scratched his chin. “Are you a soldat?” His eyes scanned Anders.

  There was no way he was going to allow us to stay there unless he trusted us. I smiled warmly and said, “My name is Kaia.” Anders flashed me a hard look, shaking his head infinitesimally. I ignored him and forged on. “I’m a Kriger, and I am in pursuit of information.”

  The room went silent. The serving wench and the sole customer stared at me with their mouths hanging open.

  “A Kriger?” the elderly man said. “And you’re a girl?”

  “Obviously.” I ground my teeth together. Why did men have such a hard time believing women could be warriors too?

  “I’ll be damned,” he said. “She told me you’d come one day. I never expected it though.”

  My body tingled with anticipation. This was it—I was finally going to get some answers. The innkeeper ushered Anders and me to one of the empty tables.

  “Sit,” he instructed. “I’ll bring you food and ale. Word will be sent that Kaia is here.”

  “Word sent to whom?” I asked, my leg bouncing with excitement. He hurried from the room as if he hadn’t heard me. “I knew coming here was the right thing to do,” I told Anders, removing my sack and laying my bo staff on the ground near my feet.

  “You should have kept your mouth shut until I had a better feel for the town. I can’t believe you just announced your name so nonchalantly! What were you thinking?” Anger radiated from his body.

  “We don’t have a lot of time to waste,” I said. Besides, what harm could possibly come from the innkeeper knowing my identity? The people of Nelebek needed the Krigers to save them. The only one who would wish me harm was Norill, and she was nowhere near. “Telling the innkeeper I’m a Kriger got his attention!”

  “I just hope it’s the right kind of
attention.” Anders’s hands flitted over his arms and legs, no doubt ensuring his daggers were ready to use if the need arose.

  The man returned and set two heaping bowls of stew down along with a jug of ale.

  “Who is expecting me?” I grabbed hold of his arm before he could leave again.

  “You mean to tell me you don’t know?” he asked, his thick, bushy eyebrows coming together.

  I felt Anders shift and feared he intended to harm the innkeeper in order to extract information. I kicked Anders’s shin and looked sternly at him, silently pleading with him to stand down.

  “I want to be sure the person you are thinking of is the same one I seek,” I answered.

  The innkeeper placed his hands on his hips. “I suppose she’ll send Jorn to fetch you. That’s why you came, right? You’re headed to her place there in the valley by the three lakes?”

  Anders pinched my knee under the table, squeezing it hard, startling me. “Yes,” he answered, still holding onto my knee. “Thank you for letting her know we’re here.”

  The innkeeper nodded and left. I shoved a spoonful of stew in my mouth, glaring at Anders, but secretly hoping I hadn’t just made a huge mistake revealing my identity. The book told me to come, we were expected, and the innkeeper seemed friendly enough. This—me being there—felt right. Anders needed to stop being so over-analytical and paranoid.

  A plump woman with light gray hair piled on top of her head approached us. “Welcome,” she said with a kind smile. “Will you be needing one room or two?”

  I opened my mouth to say we needed two beds. However, Anders pressed my knee harder, silencing me.

 

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