The Implosion

by Debra Kayn

  And if they succeeded, the program created killers with no conscience, no emotions, no faults. Most of all, each participant remained loyal to the end.

  Even now, after the switch, the brotherhood held strong. It was the only thing that helped him through the days, knowing he wasn't alone. He had a family waiting for him.

  A fucked up family, but no one was in a better position than him, and he was no worse off than anyone else.

  "I don't know," he murmured. "I've tried to figure it out on my own, and the only thing I can come up with is they ditched the project and left us behind, probably believing we'd kill ourselves off, one by one."

  "We can't let that happen." Prez turned to him. "I'd give everything away to drown myself in the bottle and not wake up, but relief doesn't come. I've tried. No matter how many fucking bottles I go through, my mind doesn't shut off. It keeps playing over the same thing."

  A group of tourists floated the river in a raft. He stared after them. He shared Prez's experience and understood the hopelessness.

  "I'm growing angrier, and the one thing I hold on to is the fact we have one hundred and twenty men who have the ability to take out each of the motherfuckers who did this to us if we stay together."

  "We wouldn't know who to go after or where to find them." He toed a loose board on the floor of the houseboat. "They destroyed everything when they set off the charges inside the tunnel, collapsing everything. I've gone up there. It'd take months to dig our way in and see if there is anything left. As you know, the handler always took his papers with him when he left."

  "It's worth a shot," murmured Prez.

  Since Prez was sane and holding his own, he said, "I had a visit from Four the other night."

  "Impossible." Prez frowned. "He was inside the cave, locked in a cell."

  "Apparently, not." He leaned his hip against the window ledge. "I came home and found him beating the shit out of Grace."

  "Grace?"

  "The woman who discovered me in the cabin."

  "She's still around?"

  "I'm keeping her."

  Prez blew out his breath. "Does she know what's going on?"

  He shook his head. "I keep her locked in the house."

  "Jesus."

  Grace wasn't club business. She belonged to him. What he decided to do in his own house was his business. Nobody else's.

  He couldn’t understand what was happening to him when it came to Grace. The connection between them never went away, only grew stronger after having sex. They shared something he couldn't pinpoint but could feel. A bond that was unfamiliar to him, but he craved her. His need to have her threatened everything and left him weak.

  He would trade all his tomorrows to go back to yesterday, and that freaked him the fuck out, considering he would do anything to escape his past. Grace represented every experience he ever had, because she brought out all the emotions in him that he'd missed for eighteen years.

  It scared him to death.

  "Four got through the lock and would've killed Grace if I hadn't arrived home at that second." He faced Prez. "I killed him."

  Prez shrugged. "He wasn't trainable. The handler should've gotten rid of him long ago."

  Speaking of Grace, he needed to get home. He hated to leave her alone more than a couple of hours at a time.

  "I need to get out of here." He slapped Prez on the shoulder. "You know where to find me if you need me."

  At the door, Prez called his name. He turned around.

  "If I don't make it, put the patch on Trip. He saw all of this coming when I doubted him," said Prez.

  "Trust me. He never saw this coming. What he's going through will show him." Keenan scoffed and grew serious. "I'll check on you in a couple of days. Try to hold out."

  He paused as the pile of liquor bottles screamed his name. Forcing himself to walk out without imbibing, he shut the door behind him.

  The only thing keeping him going was the woman waiting for him back at the house. If it weren't for Grace, he'd probably kill Prez to get to the club's stash.

  Chapter Twenty Two

  "You're letting me go?" Grace gawked at Keenan standing in the doorway leading to the garage.

  He lifted his chin, motioning her to come with him. "We're going on a ride."

  She stepped into the garage. As soon as she noticed the overhead door was up, and she could see out onto the street, she inhaled the fresh air. Her trips outside coincide with Keenan's need to exercise after midnight or early in the morning. But, most of the time, she was too fascinated with watching him workout to take advantage of the thirty-second walk across the lawn to the pole building.

  "Where are we going?" She hurried to keep up with him.

  He stopped beside his motorcycle. "Up the mountain."

  They'd grown closer lately. He acted more like a live-in boyfriend than a kidnapper when they were together. When she was alone, the fact Keenan held her captive in his house got drilled into her head.

  The thought of going out into the wilderness sent warning bells off in her head.

  She grabbed his arm. "Why?"

  "I need to check something out." He sat on the bike and gave her a second glance. "You do know if you try to run off, I'll catch you."

  Like a knife in the heart, she nodded. Her make-believe world blew up the moment Keenan threw it in her face that he would still catch her. He was her kidnapper. A fact she couldn't let herself forget.

  She climbed on behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist. Hearing him threaten her made her wish she could stay locked up in the house.

  The wind dried the tears she let flow out of Keenan's view, where he couldn't witness her falling apart. Maybe he'd threatened her because she would have the opportunity to run off. Whatever the case, she would stay aware of where he was taking her and look for an opportunity to leave him.

  She had a life away from Avery Falls, and she wanted that back. One without a man who confused her.

  Though, she'd miss the sex. However, Keenan ruined the after-glow when he acted like an asshole.

  Leaving town, she looked over his shoulder at the road ahead of them. The twists and turns all seemed to head upward in elevation.

  The paved road ended in gravel, and Keenan kept riding over the bumpy terrain. The limbs of pine trees growing close to the roadway brushed their shoulders as the gravel trail narrowed to a single lane.

  Keenan shifted, slowing his speed. The ride upset her stomach. She was almost at the point of saying something to Keenan when he came to a stop.

  He shut off the motorcycle. "Slide off, Grace."

  Hope sparked inside her. Her first thought was that he would dump her like an unwanted dog and leave her in the woods. She'd paid attention the whole way up the mountain. They couldn't have gone more than five miles. She could walk that distance back to town and find help.

  She slid off, filled with energy.

  Keenan stood and grabbed her hand. She exhaled heavily, knowing he wasn't going to let her leave him.

  He pulled her toward the trees. Dragging her feet, she asked, "Where are we going?"

  "I just want to look around." He followed a trail that opened to a bare spot hidden from the road.

  She careened her neck, looking up at the mountain. There were hundreds, maybe thousands of mountain ridges in Avery Falls. They all looked the same to her.

  He paced in front of the rock wall, every so often stopping to nudge one of the base rocks with his boot. She'd stopped holding on to his hand, hoping he'd forget and let her go, but he twined his fingers with hers, so even when she wasn't holding on, it made it seem like she was.

  Tripping on a clump of dirt, she stumbled.

  He caught her with a hand on her stomach until she gained her balance. "Okay?"

  "Why do you care?" She jerked her arm, but he refused to let go of her hand. "I suppose you want to fuck me out here and then drag me back to your house and lock me inside again."

  He cocked an eyebrow. "Is that
what you want?"

  "Of course, that's not what I want." She shoved him. "God, you make me sick."

  He frowned and turned away from her, peering at the mountain in front of them. She huffed. He made her furious.

  As he started walking, he peered closer at the ground. Back and forth in a fifty-foot span, until she lost all her patience and her fingers hurt from his grip.

  She sighed. "Please, can we just go back to the house?"

  He scanned the area, tilting his head as if hearing something.

  "What?" she asked.

  "Sh." He pulled her closer, walking to the edge of the clearing.

  She looked at him, trying to figure out what he was doing, and found his beard moving around his mouth.

  Holding her breath, she strained to hear what he was saying, but there was nothing but a bird in the distance whistling a short tune.

  He turned and put her between him and the mountain. "We have company. Whatever happens, know that I won't let you get hurt."

  Fear curled her toes, paralyzing her to the spot. With her hand free, she grabbed his vest. He'd warned her there were men out to harm her.

  "Don't leave me."

  He cupped the back of her neck, bringing her to her tiptoes. "I will never leave you."

  His hold on her hurt—a kind of hurt she needed. Over time, she'd come to learn that while he controlled every aspect of his life, when it came to her, his passionate outburst showed a crack in his armor.

  Underbrush rustled behind Keenan. Grace tensed, staring up into his eyes.

  Movement behind him caught her attention. She shrank, trying to hide behind Keenan's large body.

  He squeezed her neck, reassuring her, before letting her go and turning around. She quickly grabbed onto the back of his vest and plastered herself against him. While she trusted him to protect her—he'd already proven he could—she wasn't going to allow another man to hurt her.

  A man stepped into the clearing. "Where are they?"

  "They're gone. You knew they blew up the cave," said Keenan.

  "Are you hiding them?" Another man's deep voice sent shivers down Grace's spine.

  "My loyalty to them ended with the switch." Keenan's hand skimmed her hip as she stood behind him. "You're both supposed to stay up at the cabin."

  Grace trembled hearing about the place where Keenan kidnapped her. Were these men friends with Keenan or his enemies?

  "Fuck that." A huge man with dark hair and beard stepped into view. His gaze dropped to Grace. "Get rid of her."

  "She's not going anywhere." Keenan's body seemed to broaden. "Four made it out alive until he attacked Grace, and I killed him."

  The man's dark gaze narrowed. "If he made it out, then the others are alive, too."

  "We don't know that."

  The man moved to the mountain base and picked up a large boulder, tossing it to the side as if it weighed nothing. Grace reeled back in shock as the vibration from the rock landing went through her legs. That wasn't normal.

  There was no way a grown man could lift a rock the size of her spare tire on her Jeep. No matter how many oversized muscles he carried on his body.

  "You need to wait for the others until they're able to help. We will discover what was inside at the time of the blast." Keenan shifted to his left, keeping her away from the man.

  The other guy walked closer, putting Keenan and her in the middle. He glared while running his gaze from her toes up to her eyes before zeroing in on Keenan.

  Keenan's arm came up, pointing to his right. "Back off, Speeder."

  "Where's your ride?" Speeder stepped forward, his hands spread out from his sides. "I'm leaving."

  "You can't. Not yet. You're not finished." Keenan pushed Grace to his other side.

  She plastered herself against him, caught between two dangers. All she wanted to do was go back to the house. She'd put the padlock on the door and turn the key herself.

  "I need to find Laurel."

  "She's safe. Bonnie's safe, too," said Keenan.

  The other man turned, growling, and lunged for Keenan. Grace whimpered, burying her head under his armpit, sensing the pain that was coming her way.

  "Stop, Trip." Keenan lifted Grace and pushed her away.

  She scrambled out of the man's path, backing up toward the trees as both men named Trip and Speeder surrounded Keenan. Wanting to yell for help, she clamped her mouth shut. There was no one else around to help them, and she was afraid of drawing their attention to her.

  "Both women are fine. I've made sure they stay safe," said Keenan.

  Speeder grabbed his head. "Laurel's one of us."

  "What the fuck are you saying."

  "She's going through the switch." Speeder growled, doubling in on himself as if wounded. "I need to get to her."

  "Jesus Christ." Keenan paced. "You're sure?"

  Speeder raised his gaze. "On my life, brother."

  Keenan's head tipped back, and he gazed at the sky. Something major was happening. Something Grace failed to understand. She wanted to go to Keenan. But the other men near him kept her away and prepared to run.

  Keenan snapped out of his frustration and grabbed Speeder. "Do you know about Trina?"

  Speeder's face contorted. "What about her?"

  "She knows about the cave. The controller."

  Speeder shook his head, stumbling back. "No. That can't be right."

  "Your daughter contacted me. She was looking for him after coming up here and finding the tunnel gone. I sent her back to stay with Bonnie and the boys."

  "Is Trina involved?" Trip joined the other men.

  "No...no, I don't think so." Speeder shook his head, grabbing his skull. "Fuck, why can't I remember?"

  "You will," muttered Keenan. "It'll all come back to you."

  Trip grabbed Keenan by the front of his vest. "If they're part of this shitshow, I need to get to Bonnie. She's not one of us. They could hurt her."

  Keenan pushed Trip away. "I'll go back and bring Laurel and Trina to the cabin and check on Bonnie and the boys. But she and the boys can't come to you."

  "I'll go with you." Trip stepped around Keenan.

  Keenan grabbed him, stopping him. Grace pressed against the limbs of the tree, trying to disappear from their view as the men became more agitated.

  "If you go to town, you'll put everyone's life in danger. Everyone is sequestered in the clubhouse. Prez is taking care of himself." Keenan shook Trip. "That's an order from Prez. As you're the acting V.P., he needs you."

  Trip's granite facial expression hardened even more before Keenan shoved him away and stepped backward toward Grace. Her body, poised to run, jumped with adrenaline.

  "First, check on Bonnie, Zach, and Kenny." Trip stayed, ready to fight to get his way.

  "I'll get Laurel and Trina, check on Bonnie and the boys, and then meet you at the cabin. You both need to get the fuck out of here." Keenan turned and gathered Grace, tucking her against his side. Walking away from them, she kept glancing over her shoulder.

  Scrambling onto the motorcycle, she held on to Keenan, wishing he'd go faster down the mountain. She never wanted to leave the safety of the house again.

  Those men were dangerous. No one needed to tell her they could easily snap her in half.

  She couldn't tell if they were the men Keenan had mentioned were trying to kill him or not. Though, he acted as if he knew them. The fact they hadn't worn leather vests warned her Keenan hadn't trusted them either.

  At the house, she got off without him asking and hurried toward the garage. Standing by the back door, she wanted to rip the key out of his hand and open the lock herself.

  Once inside the house, Keenan overlooked putting the lock on the inside of the door. She hugged her middle.

  "Can you lock us in?" she whispered, scared that the men would follow.

  "I need to leave for a few hours." He framed her face with his hands. "Will you be okay?"

  "No." She slid her hands around him, holding him tight. "
Don't leave me. Please?"

  "I have to."

  "They could kill you." Knowing he was going back to them.

  "They could, but they won't."

  "You don't know that."

  He inhaled deeply and smoothed her hair away from her face. "I have to do this."

  "I don't understand." She trembled, unable to stop the fear wrapping around her.

  He kissed her forehead. "I imagine you will soon."

  She stiffened at the tone of acceptance and reluctance coming from him. As if he'd announced their relationship was over, he walked out the door.

  She swallowed hard, sinking to the floor. What was happening in Avery Falls was bigger than her. He wasn't going to let her walk away.

  She was a threat to him and the Avery Falls Motorcycle Club.

  And they weren't men who'd let her tell anyone what happened to her.

  Chapter Twenty Three

  The craving to escape his life left Keenan shaking. He sat on his Harley in the driveway, telling himself it wasn't too late. He could hit the highway out of town, be in St. Maries in an hour, and be able to get his hands on all the alcohol and drugs he needed to overdose and get the fuck out of the life he was stuck in.

  He could finally put an end to the hell he'd lived through and go out the way he wanted.

  The way he had planned to go out years ago.

  He gazed up at the stars. It was a clear night in the universe. The locals were asleep. The tourists resting in whatever cot, bag, soft spot they could find before rising early in the morning to get the most out of their vacation.

  Meanwhile, the members of AFMC were locked up like criminals, losing their minds and turning on each other. Prez was twenty bottles deep and one step from walking off the dock into the water. Speeder had his family up in the cabin, trying to take care of himself, his woman, and his daughter. Trip struggled alone, worried about Bonnie and the boys, and their safety, in town.

  He closed his eyes and let his chin drop to his chest. Meanwhile, he had no fucking idea what to do about Grace.

  She was the only thing keeping him sane. Sane as he could be.

  There was something between them. A connection. A spark. A need. Before he participated in the Alpha Bio Project, he'd never had anyone in his life that wanted him. Now, despite how he'd treated her, she wanted to stay.