Naturally Naughty

by Morganna Williams

  “Well, it was in the middle of the drive. Who puts trashcans in the middle of the driveway?”

  “They weren’t in the middle of the driveway.”

  “Yes, they were.”

  “Shannon, where is your car?”

  “At the end of the driveway.”

  “Is it in the middle?”

  “Well, no…” I frowned as I eyed the crooked angle my car sat in.

  “I rest my case.”

  “Fine! Go rest it somewhere else. I need to get moving!” I climbed back into my car and pulled the rest of the way out.

  The loud blare of the horn startled me. I glanced in the rearview mirror to see a man in a truck; the signal he was shooting me was not the universal sign of untold joy. I saw Landon standing where I left him in the driveway, watching me in shock. I put the car in drive and left. It wasn’t like it was my fault the guy almost hit me. He was clearly driving way too fast for a residential area.

  As I made my way carefully through the city streets, the phone on the seat next to me rang.

  “Hello?”

  “What the hell are you doing?”

  “What do you mean? I’m driving.”

  “You almost had an accident.”

  “That wasn’t my fault… that man was driving too fast.”

  “Shannon, he had to back up when you came out of the driveway. Thank god he saw you coming!”

  “He did not!”

  “Yes, he did. You need to get your butt back home.”

  “I will not. My butt and I are going to town to do some shopping.”

  “You do and your butt and I are gonna be having a talk later!”

  “I’m sorry, I don’t think my butt and you speak the same language!” I was quite happy with that comment as I hung up the phone.

  Ring!

  “Did you hang up on me?”

  “Oh, must have lost connection. Sorry.”

  “You’re gonna lose your panties if you’re not careful.”

  “You know, Landon, it’s really not safe for me to talk on the phone while I’m driving.”

  “What!?”

  “Yes, a policeman I know told me that. So I have to go.” I grinned, relishing having a reason to hang up on him that he couldn’t argue with. This day was looking up.

  The phone didn’t ring again the rest of the trip to town. Why did I feel like it was smoldering at me from the next seat?

  I shook off the feeling of dread in the pit of my tummy and pulled into the hospital parking lot. I was supposed to meet my friend Midge for coffee in the hospital cafeteria. She only had a twenty-minute break and I was stopping to drop off the home interior she’d ordered at my last party.

  Midge met me at the entrance and together we went through the serving line. I grabbed a cup of coffee and a cheese Danish.

  “Where’s the Sweet’n Low?” I asked the unsmiling cashier.

  “On the condom tray.”

  “On the what?”

  “On the condom tray.”

  Since I was absolutely positive I couldn’t be hearing right, I asked her another three times. Sure enough, she was calling it a condom tray, and the last time I asked, she pointed rather forcefully at a small cart in the center of the room.

  I approached with a slight feeling of trepidation. Had the safe sex movement gone so far that I was going to find Trojans and Rough Riders mixed in amidst the ketchup and Sweet’n Low?

  A sigh of relief escaped me when I found nothing but the regular assortment of condiments. The cafeteria personnel really needed to find a new abbreviation for their tray of unmentionables.

  I sat down across from Midge with a grin as I related my conversation with the cashier. Soon we were both laughing.

  All too soon Midge had to get back to work. I handed her the bathroom plaque she’d ordered and said goodbye.

  It was time to shop.

  After my fifth store I finally found the camel-colored skirt I’d been determined to buy. It would go perfectly with the brown silk sweater I had in my closet. I’d been looking for a new skirt of this color since the last one had gotten some inexplicable holes in it.

  Wardrobe replenished, it was time to head home. The only problem was the closer I got to home, the more my stomach flipped and flopped.

  I had been a little bit rude with Landon earlier. I sincerely hoped he hadn’t held it against me. I walked into the house with a grin.

  “Hi, honey, I’m home!”

  “You can proceed straight to the bedroom.”

  I studied Landon’s profile where he sat still facing the TV. He hadn’t even looked in my direction. “Landon… I might have behaved a little…”

  “Save it. Bedroom. Now.”

  The tone of his voice didn’t change and he still didn’t look in my direction, but I had a feeling he was more upset with me than he had ever been before.

  I closed my mouth and went to the bedroom. I paused in the doorway at the sight of the paddle lying on the bed. It was about the size of a ping-pong paddle, but the color of mahogany and polished to a smooth finish.

  “I see you found my surprise,” Landon said softly into my ear.

  I jumped and turned to face him, tears rapidly filling my eyes. “Landon… I’m sorry… I know I shouldn’t have…”

  “You knew you shouldn’t have when you left. So I don’t see any reason to pursue that line of conversation now. I believe I have some language lessons to teach.”

  I blushed as I recalled my earlier comment.

  “Bend over the end of the bed.”

  I stood where I was, feeling at a total loss on how to respond.

  “Now.”

  The command was softly spoken, but I responded more quickly than if he’d yelled. His utter calmness was more alarming than yells could ever be.

  With a teary sigh, I bent across the foot of the bed as he’d instructed. It came as no surprise when he lifted my skirt to my back, tucking it into my waistband, and pulled my panties to my knees.

  I felt him place a hand on the small of my back to hold me in place and closed my eyes as I waited for the first impact of the paddle.

  I didn’t have long to wait. It connected surely, leaving a fiery mass of beestings in its wake. I yelped in response.

  The paddle returned to scorch my bottom again and again. Then the evil man decided to pay special attention to my sit spots. The paddle fell over and over again in the exact same spot on the right side.

  “Owwwwie! Landon… somewhere else… anywhere else… Please!” I yelled and thoughtfully he moved on to give the left side the exact same treatment.

  When the paddle was tossed lightly to the bed at my side, I just lay and cried into the blankets.

  Landon pulled me to my feet and into his arms. I clung to him tightly, not wanting to meet his gaze. A gentle hand tipped my face up to his. “Talk to me.”

  “I’m so sorry. I don’t know why I acted that way. There was Tod… the trashcans… that man… I was just sooo embarrassed and mad at you but I’m not sure why… I love you… I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.”

  “Always.”

  I sniffled and burrowed into his chest, happy to be home. Lifting my tear-stained face to his, I kissed him deeply before dropping to my knees in front of him. I left my skirt up and my panties wherever I’d kicked them to during my spanking. I knew he would enjoy the sight of my freshly paddled bottom as I made up to him for my behavior.

  Looking up at him and holding eye contact, I unzipped his pants, relishing the feel of his hard length springing free into my hands.

  I lapped delicately at the tip of his cock, paying special attention to the little slit currently leaking drops of his delicious essence, before sucking the head into my mouth and rolling my tongue over it.

  The sound of his groan was gratifying; then his fingers sank into my hair, anchoring me in place as he began to thrust himself down my throat.

  “Take me deeper, baby,” he ordered me hoarsely.

  I ope
ned my throat wide and hummed around him as he sank down my throat. I brought a hand up to work him as he drew out of my mouth, only to greedily suck him all the way down again as I rotated my hand around the base of his shaft. I swallowed around him repeatedly as his thrusts became shorter and faster until I felt him well in my mouth just before he came, spurting his cream down my throat.

  I moaned appreciatively as I licked him clean, finally releasing him from my mouth with a loud popping sound.

  Landon pulled me to my feet and into his arms. “I love you, baby.”

  “I love you too,” I said softly as he kissed me, gasping as he cupped my sore bottom in his hands and lifted me against him.

  “Wrap your legs around my waist.”

  I quickly obeyed and threw my head back with a groan of pleasure as he sank into my waiting heat all the way to the hilt with one sure thrust. Pressing my back against the wall, Landon began to pound into me almost immediately as he alternately squeezed and slapped my tender flesh, making me tighten around him, and the pain and pleasure merged together.

  I screamed his name as I convulsed around his thick cock, milking him dry as he came again with a shout against my throat.

  Landon chuckled as he lowered me to the floor onto my shaky legs. “I trust you’ve learned your lesson, young lady.”

  “Oh, yes, indeed I have!”

  A Quick Trip to the Mall

  I smiled as the mall came into sight. It was one of my absolutely favorite places. I did so love to shop.

  “You just get that gleam out of your eyes, Shannon. This is a quick trip. No time for a leisurely shopping spree. I’m going to run to the sports outlet and exchange the shoes your mom gave me and you are going directly to Dillard’s and exchange the sweater she gave you. That’s it. There will be absolutely no other stops. Is that clear, young lady?”

  I glanced over at Landon with a frown. He could be such a pooh sometimes. “Yes, master… I hear and obey.” I said in the most Stepford voice I could manage.

  “Smart ass. Just so you know I’m serious, Shannon.”

  I grunted in response. After all, it works for him so why not for me?

  We parted in the food court. I made my way to Dillard’s, sighing as I walked past all the shops I wanted to go in. As I got close to Petland, I stopped. Sassy needed more food and some biscuits. It would be a really quick trip. Surely he wouldn’t mind if it was just in and out.

  I justified the stop to myself and went into the pet store. I grinned at the kittens and ooohhhed and ahhed over the cute puppies. I glanced at my watch and kicked it in gear. I need to hurry and grab Sassy’s food or Landon really would be irritated with me.

  I walked toward the back of the store.

  There was a parrot on his stand in the sandpit. I wasn’t paying much attention as I went by, but I had to stop and let someone pass me. That’s when disaster struck.

  As I stood by the parrot’s area calmly minding my own business, he decided to hitch a ride. He jumped on my arm and climbed up to my head before I could stop him.

  “Hey!” I yelled as the parrot, once on top of my head, began trying to rip the clip holding my hair out along with a good portion of said hair. “Owwwwww! Stop that, you stupid bird!”

  I reached my hands up to get him off my head and he immediately began biting my poor fingers without mercy. I screamed and he began to squawk and beat my head with his wings while still doing his damnedest to rip the clip out of my hair with his feet.

  Squawk… bite… flap… Scream… rip.

  On and on it went while I desperately tried to free myself from what I was sure at this point was the only carnivorous parrot in captivity.

  Finally the saleslady came and rescued me from my plight. When the parrot was happily back on his perch munching on my hair clip and I was a safe distance away, I turned to thank her.

  “Ma’am, parrots are delicate creatures. You can’t abuse them in such a fashion,” she scolded.

  I was flabbergasted. “I didn’t do anything to that damn bird. He’s a menace!”

  “You shouldn’t have disturbed him,” she said, indicating the sign that read ‘Don’t touch without assistance.’

  “I didn’t disturb him! I was minding my own business! I was attacked!”

  “Ma’am, please stop yelling. You’re disturbing the animals.”

  “What the hell is wrong with you? Don’t you speak English? That damn parrot mugged me for my hairclip! He’s a masher!”

  “What’s going on here?”

  I jumped at the sound of my fiancé’s voice behind me. “That… bird attacked me and she has the nerve of saying it was my fault. I want to press charges.”

  Landon blinked. “On the bird?”

  “Well… he bit me,” I said and held out my bruised fingers.

  Landon studied my fingers and frowned at the clerk, then at me. “This doesn’t look like Dillard’s.”

  “I… well… still, that bird…”

  “Wouldn’t have done a thing if you’d gone to Dillard’s.”

  “True, but…”

  “Apologize to the saleslady for yelling and cursing at her.”

  “But she was mean and that stupid bird…”

  “None of that excuses your rudeness. Although I would suggest the bird be put in a less accessible area since a child could really be injured, going by the look of my fiancée’s fingers, and it wouldn’t hurt to show a little concern when one of your animals attacks a customer.” Landon gave the saleslady a pointed look.

  She had the grace to flush as she stammered her agreement; then he quirked his brow at me.

  “Fine.” I turned from my fiancé, who I was sure must be the most unsympathetic man in the world. I was attacked by a vicious bird, for goodness sake, and is he comforting me? Nooooo, he’s telling me to apologize and lecturing.

  Sheeesh!

  “I apologize if I offended you or Hannibal the parrot in any way,” I said to the sales clerk before stomping out of the store.

  I started off to Dillard’s and was surprised when Landon caught my arm and pulled me in the opposite direction.

  “What are you doing? Dillard’s is that way.”

  “You aren’t going to Dillard’s. We’re going home.”

  “But I have to return my shirt.”

  “Then you should have.”

  “Jerk!” I said, pulling away from him in a huff and stomping through the mall and to the car where I stood, arms crossed and tapping my foot, as I waited for him to catch up and open it.

  “Shannon, you really need to watch the attitude. You’re pushing it big time.” Landon said as he opened the door for me.

  “I’m pushing it? I’m pushing it? I was attacked and you don’t care. That lady was rude and you make me apologize. Me! Then to top it all off you don’t let me take my shirt back, which is the whole reason we came to the stupid mall to begin with.”

  Landon didn’t say another word and I stared out the window in fuming silence, glaring his direction occasionally on the way home.

  I got out of the car and stomped inside as soon as he parked. Landon followed quickly on my heels.

  “Corner now.”

  I spun and stared at him in shock. “What!?”

  “You heard me.”

  “I will not!”

  In a flash I was turned and swatted several stinging times on my seat and led to said corner where I stood and fumed at the injustice of the world.

  I was still in a bit of a snit when Landon called me to him. “Why are you about to be spanked?”

  “Because I was attacked by a crazy parrot?”

  Landon sighed and pulled me down across his lap, quickly baring my bottom. He delivered five stinging smacks, then asked again.

  “Ooowww… because I didn’t go straight to Dillard’s?”

  Five more smacks. “Better answer, but try again.”

  “I was rude to the salesgirl?”

  Five more smacks.

  “Cause I was rude
to you?”

  “Bingo.”

  Now you would think I would get rewarded for the right answer, but nope. Right answer and he just started spanking the pee-diddlee-squat out of me.

  “Oooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwww! I’m sorreeeeeeeeee! Landon, I’m soorrrrrreeeeeee!”

  “You should be. I didn’t do anything to warrant the snotty behavior you treated me to. You chose not to go to Dillard’s, not me. I also let her know I thought the parrot was dangerous, which I’d like to point out I did without cursing at her and throwing a wall-eyed fit.”

  His hand continued to fall as he emphasized his point with some very well-placed smacks to my sit spot. Then when he had expressed himself to his satisfaction, he turned me in his arms. “I love you, Shannon, but I will not put up with tantrums and you know it.”

  I sniffed into his shirt. “Yes, sir. I’m sorry I was so horrid to you. I was upset about the parrot, but I know if I’d just done what I was there to do, the whole thing would never have happened.”

  He smiled and started to kiss the top of my head but froze. “Uhhh, sweetheart?”

  I grinned and snuggled in closer. “Yes?”

  “You might want to go take a shower. You have parrot poop in your hair.”

  “Aaaaaarrrrrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh!!”

  Sometimes a Little Does Not Go a Long Way

  “Really, Seb, you wouldn’t believe it! He can be sooo bossy!”

  “Who, Landon? Get out!” Seb replied in a dramatically shocked voice.

  “Well, he can be!”

  “Which of course you’ve done nothing to bring about.”

  “I haven’t done anything! Well, not lately anyway. I’m reformed. Good as gold!”

  “Uh-huh.”

  “I am!”

  “I believe ya, babe. Honest.”

  I grinned as I made my way out to the car. “Thanks for having lunch with me, Seb.”

  “You’re welcome, babe. I enjoyed it!”

  I started my car and pulled out of the parking lot, frowning as I eyed the red letters in the left-hand corner of my dash that blinked up at me demandingly: Check Gauges.

  “Hmmmm …”

  “What’s the matter, babe?”

  “My gas light is on. I need to get some gas. Although I think it’s good for about forty miles once the light comes on.”