“That’s…” I ran a hand down my face because none of the words I was thinking were appropriate to say to her.
“Fucked-up? Yeah, I know. But it’s made me who I am today and I really like me, so if I had to go through that, at least I knew enough to stop the cycle.”
“Sing me the song,” I said to her. I wanted to know what was so comforting about it and the fact that it was music that had helped her had my chest puffing up. Music was something I knew.
“No way.”
“Come on.” I dug my fingers into her side, where she just happened to be ticklish. I’d found that out by accident one day. Her giggle made my heart swell and I never wanted to stop hearing it. But finally, she was struggling to catch her breath and told me to stop.
So I did.
Once she could speak, she said, “Daltrey. I’m not a singer.”
“Doesn’t matter. Neither am I.”
She growled. Like an actual growl and then the words softly came from her mouth. It wasn’t something I recognized and my gut told me that she’d made it up. Didn’t matter. As far as I was concerned, it the most beautiful song I’d ever heard. And fuck her thinking she couldn’t sing. She had an adequate voice technically, but it was perfect to me.
“That’s beautiful, Ella,” I said quietly to not break the spell we were both under.
“It got the job done.”
We fell into a comfortable silence as I weighed the pros and cons of kissing her. It felt like the right moment, but the struggle was about her feeling differently than I did. I wouldn’t chance not being friends with her.
Suddenly, Ella propped herself up onto her elbow, which left her looking down at me.
“Can I ask you something?” she asked.
“You know you can.”
“Are you and I just friends? To you, I mean? Is that what we’re doing here?”
“We’re friends obviously, but—”
“Mack said something to me earlier and I don’t really want to get into it, but I don’t do this with friends. Even Emery. We don’t lie down together and cuddle and I’m starting to feel certain things and I have to know if I need to stop those feelings.” She was rambling and it was god damned adorable.
“Ella.” I slid my hand across her cheek and into her hair. “You don’t need to stop anything.”
Then, one of the things I’d been dreaming of doing, I did.
I pushed her onto her back at the same time I lifted myself off the mattress so that I could hover over her. I wasted no time pushing my lips against hers. I’d meant to be gentle, but once my mouth was on hers, I couldn’t help myself. I needed a taste.
Lucky bastard that I was, she let me have one. Her lips parted and I didn’t hesitate to stick my tongue in her mouth. I stroked her tongue gently, then she did the same. It was a beautiful game of push and pull and in this case, just a kiss had me as hard as a rock. My eager cock was begging to be let loose.
Clearly, I wasn’t going to do that, but there was no way she couldn’t feel it even through the blanket.
When I pulled back, she shivered and I had been right. Her nipples were hard little pebbles poking through her shirt. I slid my hand down her side, letting my thumb run over the one closest to me. Her breath stalled then she turned into me.
“I’m a little chilly.”
“Sure, that’s what it is.” I never claimed not to be a cocky asshole. “Come on.” When I lifted the blanket, she slid right in and snuggled back against my side, but I had to tilt her head up to kiss her again. Now that I’d had one, it would never be enough.
We stayed like that. Talking and kissing until she fell asleep. Once I’d heard her breathing even out, I wouldn’t dare disturb her.
Eventually, I nodded off too.
13
Ella
My favorite thing about the morning wasn’t waking up and it wasn’t the coffee I knew I’d be having soon enough. It was the first morning stretch. Almost nothing felt as good as that stretch and it was a little pleasure I’d given myself every morning since I was a kid.
Today’s was even better because I stretched out next to Daltrey. Though at first, I’d forgotten that I’d been in his bunk when I’d fallen asleep and was startled for a split second wondering what man was beside me.
Then I remembered that he’d kissed me last night. All those wonderful memories flooded back. He hadn’t tried to take it further other than that one time he’d flicked my nipple. I’d felt that in my core. Now it was time to open my eyes and face him while wondering if all those kisses we’d shared last night had been real or had been the result of us both just being here and feeling like it.
“Rise and shine,” he said softly, to which I groaned.
I really was going to have to face him. Slowly, I forced my eyes open.
Daltrey was on his side facing me. One hand was under his cheek and the other on my hip with his hair a mess. He’d never looked so beautiful.
“Is this where I do the walk of shame?” I asked because it was the first thing that had popped into my head.
He chuckled softly. “For it to be a walk of shame, a lot more would’ve had to happen last night. Please tell me that I haven’t forgotten anything about last night.”
I bit back a smile. “I don’t think you’ve forgotten anything.”
“Good. I’d have to kick my own ass if I’d forgotten the first time I was inside you.”
Pushing my thighs together did nothing to alleviate the ache he’d caused there.
“You can just roll out,” he continued. “Everyone’s already out there, so there’s no way to keep them from noticing. Although they probably already know.”
My eyes widened. “How?”
“Did you shut your divider last night?”
Damn. I hadn’t, so I shook my head.
“Well, that’s how then,” he told me. “I sent Mack a text so he’d know you were on the bus and we could pull out without leaving you behind.”
“Shit.” I glanced toward the opening and then back to him. “You go first. I can hear them.”
“Nothing happened. You just stayed until we both fell asleep. Just go out.”
“You first and tell them that.”
He chuckled and shook his head. “You’re blocking my way.”
We had a momentary stare-down where I tried not to giggle at the way he was looking at me. “Climb over me.” The words came out of my mouth before I could stop them, but I really didn’t want to go out there first.
Daltrey chuckled then began his climb, but when he got on top of me, my legs shifted on their own, spreading as if I’d commanded them to, but the thought hadn’t crossed my mind. Daltrey sunk down between them, leaving only the blankets between us. Even with that barrier, I could feel his morning hardness pressing against me in the exact right place. I groaned unexpectedly.
One corner of his mouth turned up because he knew exactly what he was doing to me.
He slowly licked his lips and I knew I was in trouble.
When Daltrey moved in slowly, I pulled back as much as I could. “Morning breath.”
His lazy smile showed just a bit of his teeth. “I don’t care if you don’t.” Then he kissed me.
This one was slower and different from the one last night. Last night, every time our lips had met, we’d been exploring. Getting to know each other. This wasn’t that. This morning, his kisses were full of need and I knew mine were as well. It’d been so long since another person had touched me—a year at my best guess—that I’d almost forgotten how good it could be.
He adjusted himself so that the blankets were no longer between us. He slid a hand up my hip and under my shirt. He didn’t even hesitate to cup my breast and brush his thumb over my nipple, making me arch my back.
It wasn’t going to take much for him to make me come. I was halfway there as it was.
Daltrey pushed my shirt up and took a nipple into his mouth. The way he scraped his teeth against my sensitive nub had me
wanting to moan. I kept it quiet, though, since I was fully aware that we weren’t alone on the bus.
He kissed me long and hard again before hooking his thumbs into my bottoms.
“Is this OK?”
I nodded. “I have to warn you, though. It’s been a while. There’re probably cobwebs down there.”
Daltrey chuckled as he kissed his way down my stomach.
“Let me clear those out for you.”
Well, if he was offering, who was I to say no?
Once we freed my legs, which was a lot smoother than I thought it’d be, Daltrey pushed my legs as far apart as they go, exposing me to him in what could’ve been an embarrassing way. But I didn’t feel exposed with him.
His mouth descended and it took everything in my power to keep quiet, as I thought Daltrey’s tongue should be studied by scientists. It moved in ways I don’t think anyone else’s did. He licked, sucked, and nipped at me until I was squirming. It felt too good. I almost didn’t want the release I was chasing so he’d keep doing it. He swirled around my opening then sucked one of his fingers into his mouth before sliding it inside me. As his finger moved in and out, he went back to teasing my clit.
In almost no time, I was done. My muscles quivered and my fingers gripped his hair tightly, possibly painfully, but he didn’t say a word. I was left panting for air as if I’d run a marathon. Honestly, nothing in my life had ever felt so good. I’d thought I’d been having good orgasms this whole time and in reality, they’d been mediocre.
Daltrey kissed his way back up my body and all I could do was hang on to his shoulders until I got my bearings back.
“You have…a very talented tongue.” It was hard to get out, but I did it.
He chuckled into my neck. “You can make use of it anytime that you want.”
“You’re going to be sorry you made that offer,” I said as I shook my head.
“I guarantee I won’t be.” He pushed his hard cock against my thigh. When I reached for him, he pulled it away by the wrist. “If you touch me right now, this will be over before we begin.”
I wet my suddenly dry lips. I wanted my mouth on him, but if he was serious, I wanted him inside me more. There was always time for that later.
“Let me grab a condom.” He started to move away, but I held his arms to stop him.
“I swear to you, I never do this, but I have an IUD if you’d rather not.” What I told him was true. I never had sex without a condom, but honestly, I hadn’t trusted a single person I’d been with the way that I trusted Daltrey already. With him, I wanted to feel him and not the condom.
In retrospect, it wasn’t my finest decision given what I knew about his history but I was too in the moment to care.
A war waged in his eyes. What he was fighting with himself about, I had no idea until he said, “Ella, there’s nothing I’d rather do than be inside you with nothing between us, but I’m going to have to say no.”
“OK.” There were many reasons for a guy to want to use a condom. He had no idea whom I’d been with or any of that stuff. Of course he slept around a ton. I knew that. It was a risk and probably dumb that I’d been willing to take it. “I get it. You don’t know… Never mind. Grab the condom.”
He pinched my chin between his finger and thumb, forcing me to look at him. I hadn’t realized I’d been avoiding it. “Ella, this has nothing to do with you.”
“I could give you—”
“Nothing. You aren’t likely to give me anything, but I, on the other hand, wouldn’t feel right until I’m tested for everything under the sun.” He wet his lips nervously. It was different than how he did it in his sexy way. “Let’s just say that when I was drinking—”
“Got it.” I slapped a hand over his mouth. Hearing about his sex life right now would kill my mood because the idea of him with anyone else killed me, even though we both had pasts.
Daltrey reached over to the little cubby next to his bed and pulled out a condom. He had it on and was back between my legs. Once he was inside me, the thoughts that had been threatening to ruin this quickly melted away. There was nothing I cared about other than him and me and how he was making me feel. Daltrey had some talents I hadn’t even thought to consider and when he flipped us over so I was on top, he didn’t even bump my head.
I moved my hips the way I knew how. The bunk was full of our soft moans and the sound of our bodies quietly slapping against each other. It was almost time for me to come again when he flipped us around again. He pulled my leg up his waist and hit a really good spot deep inside me. Just as I let go, he did too.
Daltrey pushed my hair away from my face and kissed me long and hard.
“Now it’s a walk of shame,” he whispered against my lips.
I pushed my fist into his stomach, making him grunt, then burst out into a laugh louder than I would’ve liked. Now everyone out there for sure knew we were awake.
“I hate you,” I said with a sigh.
“You love me.”
We both froze. He’d said it to be funny, but I couldn’t deny he wasn’t completely wrong. Could you fall in love with someone in such a short time? I wasn’t sure, but I knew what I was feeling and it was completely different from how I’d felt with anyone else.
Before I’d fallen for the wrong men and I must’ve kept my heart guarded even when I thought I was living in the moment because none of those times ever felt like this.
“You still have to go out first,” I said with an unsteady voice.
“Hey.” He slid his hand into my hair again. “I didn’t mean—”
“I know.” I kissed him softly. “But I also can’t deny it. I’m just not sure I’m ready to fully embrace it, either.”
He nodded then smiled. “Well, whenever you’re ready.”
Daltrey used some tissues he had on the side of the bunk to get rid of the condom before he slid back into his boxer. Then he grabbed a pair of pajama bottoms from that same side cubby and put those on before he dropped out of the bunk. I hurried to get myself back into my pajamas as well.
“Morning,” a chorus of singing voices said when I assumed, he got out there.
“Morning.”
“Anything new?” That sounded like Lexi to me.
“Not really. And Ella would like you all to know that nothing happened last night,” he said in a much louder voice, probably so I’d hear him. “Absolutely nothing. We just fell asleep talking.”
“Sure, it didn’t.” I couldn’t tell if that was Bonham or Van. They sounded exactly alike.
“It didn’t,” Daltrey insisted and he wasn’t lying. Nothing happened until this morning. “Last night.”
The entire room erupted in laughter and I was never leaving this bunk again.
I lay there, mortified that they all now knew what we’d been doing in here. My hands were over my face as I thought about all the ways I could handle this. I could go out there and act like I didn’t care, but since I was pretty sure my face was on fire like the sun had personally kissed it, they’d know I did care. I wouldn’t be able to go out there and own it. That wasn’t me. I’d wanted that moment to be between Daltrey and me and no one else. But living on a bus made that almost impossible.
At least we’d be staying in a hotel tomorrow night, so no one would be able to hear anything.
As I was trying to figure out my exit strategy, the divider was thrust opened and Daltrey was there with his arms on the ledge.
“What are you doing?” he asked.
“Trying to see if I can become one with this mattress and never have to come out there.”
He chuckled deep in his chest and pulled my hands back. I turned on my side so that I could face him. “That’s not how I want to be on top of you.”
Feminine giggles came from the front area. I slapped a hand back over my face. “You’re ridiculous.” My words were muffled, but I was pretty sure he’d heard me because the fucker laughed.
“Come on. Get up. Let’s go get some breakfast.” He tugg
ed on my arm and since I knew I had to get up eventually, I let him pull me out of the bunk.
But I really didn’t want to face everyone just yet. When my feet hit the floor, I slid right into the bathroom so I could delay the inevitable a few more minutes.
When I came out, they’d all left, so I thought I was in clear, but nope. Daltrey told me they’d left so I’d feel more comfortable but we were meeting them for breakfast. I supposed there was no saving face. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders as we walked across the street to the diner-type restaurant for breakfast. They were all seated in a long line of tables that had been pushed together for the big group and the place wasn’t busy, probably because this wasn’t exactly optimal breakfast time.
I slid into a seat next to Lexi and Daltrey was on the other side of me.
She leaned over and whispered, “These guys might harass you, but I swear we didn’t hear anything this morning.”
“Really?” At least this meant I could relax a little.
“Really. They’re going to say otherwise, but you were quiet.”
“Thank you.” My shoulders settled back at the same time Daltrey’s hand met my leg just above my knee.
“But please tell me it was good,” she said. “Even if it was quiet.”
I giggled. “It was.”
“Good. Daltrey looks happy.”
And I really hoped he was because I was getting attached in a way that I knew it would be impossible to ever let go.
14
Daltrey
That day after breakfast, my brothers gave me some shit about Ella in our dressing room. Not bad shit. Just brother shit. If we didn’t tease and harass each other, we wouldn’t know that anybody cared. It was our love language.
Deep down, they each said they just wanted to see me happy and they’d predicted this since we’d met.
Daltrey (Pushing Daisies Book 4) Page 11
