Selkie's Song (Fado Trilogy)

by Clare Austin

  “I don’t care,” Muireann said and pressed the fistful of cash into Nora’s hand. “Here, take this and I’ll leave you to your audit.”

  Nora shook her head and slapped the money onto the desk top. “Dammit, take this and get out of here.” Tears filled her eyes and spilled onto her pale cheeks. “I’m probably headed to jail along with Feeney.” Her shoulders trembled and she walked back toward the glass partition mumbling, “What am I gonna do? I’m going to prison with that embezzling crook…”

  ****

  Ty could hear the music as he got out of his car. As though the walls of O’Malley’s could no longer contain the sound, it seeped through into the street.

  As he reached for the door handle, a couple exited past him, greeting him by name. He recognized Simon and Cait.

  With a half-boozy grin, Simon smacked Ty on the back. “Good on ya,” he shouted and Cait laughed as if she thought Simon was the most charming man to grace the planet. “Yer the object of much admiration. Go on in, the pints are on meself.”

  Ty wasn’t sure what he had done to deserve any recognition, but when he found Muireann and told her what they needed to do, he hoped she would think he was pretty special.

  As his eyes adjusted to the light, he scanned the room for Muireann. She wasn’t in her usual corner booth and not behind the bar with her father. He tried to make his way across the room, but each person had a smack on his back or a handshake for him. They were acting like he’d won the lotto. He couldn’t figure how, even in this small town, news could have slipped out about his plan to donate the O’Malley land.

  “What can I get for you, Sloane?” Turlough asked. “The pints are gratis tonight thanks to some bet my daughter made with Si O’Flaherty, so best take advantage while you can.”

  “Sure, a stout then. What was the nature of the bet?” Ty asked as Muireann’s da started to build his pint of stout.

  “I’m not sure about the particulars…some kind of dare he was certain she wouldn’t take on.” Turlough laughed and set a pint in front of Ty. “It’s been a good long time since our Muireann has been willing to get into a dare with Simon.”

  “Where’s Muireann? I have some news for her.” He hoped she would find it interesting but compelling.

  “Oh, I think she’ll be on her way here by now. She wouldn’t want to miss the party.”

  The back door slammed on its hinges. It was Muireann. She looked up and saw Ty but didn’t smile. Ty’s heart gave an extra hard thump. She didn’t look happy but she was still the most beautiful woman he’d ever laid eyes on.

  “Muireann,” he called. She met his eyes and he could see her jaw tighten as he approached. “I have some great news. Come with me somewhere a little quieter?”

  “Ty, I really…I’m not feeling so chipper.”

  “No excuses, beautiful,” he said and took her by her elbow. “I promise you’re gonna love this.” Ty hoped he could keep that promise as they made their way to the back of the pub. “Besides, I need your help.” They had to find some shred of proof they could pass on to the McFallon Trust. Time was short if the O’Malley land was to be preserved.

  They came close to knocking Simon over as he and Cait swung through the door. “Oh, sorry now,” Si said and punched Ty in his upper arm. Tynan did a mental eye roll at the attempt at conviviality. The guy was starting to wear on him like sand in his shoe.

  Muireann shot Simon a look that should have welded the boy’s mouth shut in an instant. But, Simon was beyond sensibility.

  “Hey, selkie, is he a good sport?” Simon asked.

  “Simon,” Muireann shook her head. “You don’t need to be saying anything in your state.”

  Cait laughed, gave Ty a flirty smile, and turned to Muireann. “You got the best of the bet anyway.”

  Tynan just wanted Muireann out of the bar and alone where they could talk. He tried to move her past Simon. “We were just on our way, Si.”

  “Ah, now, Ty, you should at least finish that pint. Without you, I wouldn’t be buying tonight.”

  Tynan could feel the anger and heat coming off Muireann as she balled her fists and spoke through clenched teeth. “Simon, shut your gob.”

  Ty’s stomach went cold at the distress in Muireann’s voice and posture. What made her so visibly upset with her good friend? Curiosity piqued, he asked Simon, “What’s going on here?”

  Before Si could answer, Muireann grabbed Ty’s arm and hustled him toward the door. “Simon’s full of shit. He’s being an arrogant jerk because he lost a bet.”

  It should have been a lighthearted matter, but Muireann wasn’t laughing as she let the door of the pub slam behind them. Out on the street, the wind blew her hair in a wild mess about her face and she pushed it back with an irritation he’d not seen in her before.

  The cold knot in his gut solidified and Ty had never seen Muireann this upset. Even when they were confronted by Ian Feeney behind O’Malley’s the night of the bonfire, she had not reacted quite like this.

  Then she was furious.

  Now, she was afraid.

  He’d never thought to see fear in this staunchly independent and determined woman. He tried to pull her into his arms to shelter her from the wind. “Let’s get out of this weather. My car’s up the street.”

  But she pushed him away. “Listen, Ty. I’m a horrible person and you should get the hell away from me.” Her words pierced him and he could feel stabs of fear in his own heart.

  “Why can’t you tell me what’s happened?” he shouted over the howl of the wind. “Tell me. What’s frightening you?”

  Muireann shook her head. “I can’t. You don’t understand. You won’t understand!” She tried to back away from him but Tynan gripped her upper arm.

  “You’re not running away. It doesn’t solve anything.”

  “Please,” she begged and tears started to pool in her eyes. “Don’t make me. It was a stupid mistake. You don’t need to be part of it.”

  A flash of lightning brightened the sky over the sea and thunder rattled the glass in the store window behind Muireann. She jumped toward Ty and he caught her in his arms, but she pulled back before he had a chance to comfort her.

  In that moment he knew he needed to back off with his questions. She was truly afraid to tell him what was going on. “Listen for a minute,” he said in her ear. “It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about this.”

  Muireann’s eyes widened. “Stop being so fuckin’ nice,” she shouted. “It’s a serious problem, you being such a gallant man. People will always take advantage of you.”

  “That’s me, a nice guy and, so far it’s worked for me.” Ty almost laughed. “No one has ever taken unfair advantage.”

  “I have,” Muireann muttered and backed away as though she thought he would strike her for telling the truth.

  A chuckle of relief rumbled in his chest. “Please, take advantage any time.”

  His attempt at a jovial comment only brought a grimace to her strained face. Muireann’s throat tightened and she closed her eyes. Ty thought she looked like she was waiting for a guillotine to come down on her neck.

  “It was a dare,” she said.

  “I know. Your da told me.”

  “He told you? And you’re still standing here pretending like you care about me?”

  “I’m not pretending.”

  Ty heard a tiny breath of relief escape her lungs. “He told you Simon dared me to have sex with you?”

  A knife-like stab of hot pain pierced Tynan’s head and traveled down to his gut. “What did you just say?” He was sure he’d misunderstood her.

  Muireann’s face went blank and her eyes dilated. She had the look of a trapped animal. “I—uh…What did my da tell you?”

  Ty searched her face for a sign he’d misheard her.

  “Say something,” she demanded. “Tell me how despicable I am.”

  “You…were playing me?” Ty couldn’t remember pain like this. Was she saying this was all a game for her? �
��You seduced me? As a joke?” he said. Emasculation and shame simmered through his veins. “And you talked about us to your friends?”

  Rain pelted him, but he didn’t feel it. He only felt the sting of Muireann’s words. His beautiful, passionate lover had been pretending.

  “Unbelievable,” he whispered. “Fucking unbelievable.”

  Muireann reached for his arm. “It was a mistake,” she offered.

  Her touch burned him, and he lurched back stumbling over the uneven sidewalk. “Fuck.” Ty caught his physical balance, but his emotional equilibrium teetered. The only salvation was to walk away from her, from the pain, from the betrayal.

  “I didn’t think. I didn’t think you’d care,” Muireann called to him over the storm’s rage.

  With one last glance over his shoulder at her pale and tearstained face, Tynan walked in the direction of his car. The sky opened and a sheet of rain hit him full on. Icy needles of sleet that stung his skin. “I cared,” he said, and his words were swallowed up by the roar of the storm.

  Muireann’s legs were immobile stone as she watched Ty walk out of her life. She should run after him and explain. Explain to him how she felt now, how special he was in her life, even after such a short and confusing few days.

  Her chaotic reality had reached out and hurt a decent man, a man she could love for the rest of her life.

  Rain and tears blinded Muireann. Instinct alone found her van.

  The village always appeared empty when the rain was spitting sideways. Everyone kept inside. But today it looked as though a neutron bomb had cleaned the town of all living things. Even seabirds huddled, silently, under eaves and in the shelter of the dock pilings.

  Her chilled fingers ached. The ignition switch was hesitant. The motor grumbled and refused to turn over. A scream of reproach caught in her throat.

  This was no time to count her screw-ups. Tynan would never want to see her face again. For that she felt a bone-cold sorrow.

  All her efforts merited no congratulation. Sure, she had found the money she needed, sold Ronan’s harp, scraped all her resources together, planned and schemed. She hadn’t counted on the pain all the machinations had brought.

  What had Nora meant about it being too little too late?

  Muireann turned the ignition key again and the old van coughed to life. She pulled out and headed west into the storm.

  The ancient chimneys were obscured by the low-lying clouds churned by gale force gusts off the sea. The derelict fortress appeared in a black and grey scene reminiscent of an old photo. No hint of color could be detected until the wipers on the van windscreen slashed its path and Muireann caught sight of a splash of red.

  Tynan’s hire car.

  She did not need another confrontation with Ty. Every time she opened her mouth, she made the situation worse. She should just drive away.

  The engine idled and died. Muireann turned the key. The ignition only clicked. The worst ominous, vacant sound imaginable at this moment. Click.

  She waited, prayed, damned the old van for its lousy timing. Muireann rested her forehead against the steering wheel and fought off the hysteria that formed a cold ball in her chest. A scream of recrimination choked in her throat.

  Everything she had ever dreamed, worked toward, fought for, everything she touched tarnished like her aunt’s favorite silver milk pitcher. Muireann could see her smudged fingerprints on every tainted spot.

  She held her breath and turned the key in the ignition. The old engine coughed. Muireann’s heart ratcheted up in hope, but the van refused to start. Tears of frustration pinched the back of her eyes, not from the annoyance of failure of automotive technology or even the rotten weather. This ache went deeper than everyday inconveniences and it cut hard into a part of her where she wanted never to feel raw again.

  Muireann had thought she’d sewed her heart closed and shielded it with plans and expectations. She’d not think past the next project, the next cause. She had kept busy as the savior of the west so that nothing would gain ground on her and pull her under the tides of grief again.

  What had Tynan done to her? What had she done to him?

  A tap on the driver side window made her jump. She wiped the mist from the inside of the glass with her sleeve.

  Tynan. Tynan like she had never seen or even imagined him.

  With a cold stab of realization, Muireann knew this was a side of him not seen very often.

  The gentle, chivalrous, always calm and courteous Ty Sloane was steaming mad.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  “Get out of the goddamn van before it blows off the cliff with you in it,” Ty shouted with anger to match the howl of the wind.

  His tone should have sparked Muireann’s own frustration to a peak, but a chill of fear ran up her spine and shut off her voice. Tynan wouldn’t hurt her physically, but she wasn’t sure he wouldn’t wound her emotionally. Tit for tat. She’d cut him deeper than any knife could penetrate.

  He tugged on the door. A gust pulled it from its rusted hinges and it took off like a sail and crashed onto the gravel roadway. Ty grabbed Muireann’s arm with a bruising grip and dragged her from the driver’s seat.

  She stumbled and would have fallen if he hadn’t had a tight hold of her. “What the hell are you doing?”

  A nettle torn from the earth by the storm whipped into Muireann, stinging her face. Ty didn’t even try to deflect the assault. He half carried, half pulled her into the east end of the fortress where they would have a little shelter from the wind that rushed sideways off the sea.

  The west coast of Ireland was famous for wind, rain, and unpredictable weather, but with the intensity of this upheaval the universe itself was determined to rip her to shreds.

  Ty pinned her against the stones with his body. She could feel his heart bang in his chest and his hot breaths come in rapid bursts against her cheek. He exuded menace, transformed into a stranger.

  Struggle was fruitless against his physical hold. “What do you want from me?” she asked.

  Ty shook his head. “All of a sudden you want to know what I want?” He spread his feet and braced his pelvis against her. “I can count on one hand the times in my life anyone has asked me what I wanted.”

  Arousal conquered fear. Muireann had to fight the temptation to respond to her fickle body. “I understand why you’re angry. Will you give me a chance to explain?”

  “No. I don’t think you deserve that chance.” He loosened his grip on her shoulders, but kept her pinned against the rock wall with his body. “All I want to know from you now is what proof you have.”

  The raw stones dug into her shoulder blades and the pain focused Muireann’s thoughts. “Proof of what?”

  Ty glanced around the room. “This place. This so-called fortress. I need concrete proof, not stories and legends. What’s your evidence?” He turned back to her, blue eyes blazing. “Then I’ll at least know why I changed my plans for you.”

  Muireann lowered her eyes in an attempt to avoid the anger in his. Ty cupped her chin and turned her face up. He was millimeters from her lips and the invasion of her personal space intimidated her. “Please,” she said, trying not to incite more wrath than she already had. “It’s just what I’ve been told. I’ve searched everywhere Bertie said and I can’t find anything.”

  Ty backed up and gave her breathing room. He ran his hand through his tousled hair in frustration.

  “I’m sorry,” she insisted. “I needed this place, this land. It’s the only barrier to the cliffs.” She stepped to him. “I never meant to hurt you. Can we start over?”

  Cold blue ice reflected in his eyes when he looked back at her. “Start over?” He shook his head. “Maybe you are some creature from the sea. You think you can play fast and loose with me and then just ‘start over’ when things don’t go your way?”

  Every muscle on his frame clenched in unmasked anger as he approached her again, held her immobile. His heart beat a tattoo in his chest so intimately with h
ers, she couldn’t differentiate their pulses.

  Naked fury emanated from him and at once chilled her soul and ignited her passion. Muireann struggled free. “This isn’t like you.”

  “Like me? You have no idea.” His hands bit into her shoulders. “All my life I’ve accommodated everyone else…my parents, teachers, priests. I left everything behind, including you, and moved to Boston because it was the right thing to do for my family.”

  Her nature was to challenge him, but this alter ego, Ty Sloane’s hidden self, excited her. She wondered where this latent spark buried deep in his soul might take him.

  “I thought you liked being the sensible big brother. What? Now it doesn’t suit?” she taunted. “You can’t tell me this is the first time you’ve done anything spontaneous.”

  Ty pushed away but left his hands on her shoulders. He shook his head. “I was so sure you were different. Is this all you want from me?” He leaned in and kissed her hard on her startled mouth.

  The assault angered Muireann. How dare he? She struggled to pull her mouth away, but was too late to prevent her blood from coursing hot.

  “You wanted me then. Why not now? Maybe because you’re not in control.” He pressed her back against the remains of the fireplace. The stones shook with his sudden move. “I was ready to give up everything I ever dreamed. For what?” As he spoke his hips ground into her, threatening to dislodge more than the crumbling wall at her back. “For you.”

  Muireann’s heart thundered beneath her ribs. Though she fought her arousal, the want sizzled from the tips of her nipples and scorched a path to the cradle of her pelvis.

  Like a spiral of clockworks, desire began to wind tight, and Ty’s ragged breaths against her neck were the watch keys only he had the power to turn.

  “You asked me what I want,” he whispered as though the ghosts might hear and object. “I want you.”

  “Not here, Ty. Not like this.” She didn’t sound convinced, even to her own ears.

  “Why? Because you’re not calling the shots?” He nipped at her ear. “This time, selkie, I’m the one taking advantage. I’m in control.”