Liv, in the Moment

by Dale, Tracy

  "I hope you don't mind," she said when they were on their way, "but is it okay if I'm all over you in the movie?"

  For the first time ever, she saw Connor's jaw drop. "I'm pretty sure there's no bugs in here, but you never know," she said.

  He grinned, and then quickly sobered. "I'm not going to pressure you, Lucky. Ever. I mean it. If you want to wait until marriage someday--" He swallowed and looked pained. "--I'll accept it."

  She sighed. "You're so amazing."

  His eyes flicked to hers uncertainly. "I'm being serious. I know Jackson made you really uncomfortable. I don't want to do that."

  "You won't."

  He wanted her badly though. "I could get carried away--"

  "Me too." She really could with him.

  "Liv! I'm being serious. Still."

  She tried to look dutiful and appreciative but she was floating on Cloud Nine-Thousand.

  He continued, "Just tell me to stop, and I'll stop. No matter what. I promise."

  Love him.

  He parked outside the theater and they sprinted to the movie that had already started. He started to take a seat towards the back, but must have changed his mind and chose a side row instead.

  Liv was already refusing to look at the screen. She kept her shoulders scrunched to her ears to keep from hearing the music.

  He moved the armrest up and pulled her half onto his seat. She immediately buried her face in his neck. Nice.

  She stayed like that for a while, before she started to stroke over his chest and abs, tracing the ridged muscles.

  He tensed.

  She leaned back to look at him.

  He stared back, paying no attention to the movie.

  She traced his features softly; the line of his nose, the sharp angle of his cheeks and jaw, the seam of lips. "I've wanted to do that from the first day we met," she whispered.

  He kissed her, sweeping his tongue into her mouth. His arm went so tight around her she was practically draped across his chest.

  After a while, he pulled away. His expression showed what a supreme effort of will that had taken. "Don't want you uncomfortable," he rasped.

  She wanted to laugh. Uncomfortable? When she'd been longing for this for forever? She didn't say it though. Although she was drunk on his taste and the heady sensation of being in his arms, she knew once she came back down to earth, she'd say she didn't want to rush anything.

  She was pretty sure anyway.

  But it didn't really matter, she realized. Because he loved her--or almost did--and wouldn't push her. Rush had no place in this equation.

  For the first time in her life she liked an equation. Her math teacher would be proud.

  She curled against his chest again, slid her hand under his shirt, stroked his smooth skin before resting her hand above his heart.

  Connor was still for a moment, and then he put his hand over hers. "It's yours."

  She smiled. Then she laughed. And then she cried a little. "It's about damn time, Connor."

  * * * *

  As soon as Liv closed the front door behind her, she said, "So how upset would you be if I said Connor was head over heels for me?"

  Mom had come to the door of the den. Now she just...stared. "Define 'upset'," she said slowly.

  "Worried. Or Ecstatic."

  "I would be upset."

  "Worried?"

  "Or."

  Liv squealed and launched herself into Mom's arms. They both laughed and maybe Mom cried, but the tears were wiped before anyone could see. Dad practically burst out of the den, wearing an expression somewhere between concern and amusement. "What's all the ruckus about?"

  "Connor finally told her how he felt about her," Mom said.

  Liv practically jumped out of her arms. "What do you mean, 'finally'?"

  "We're not blind, Livvy," Dad said.

  "You knew?"

  "I knew ages ago," Dad said. "Without your mother mentioning it, which should tell you something."

  "Did he tell you he loved you?" Mom said.

  Liv quickly got over her shock. "He said he thinks he does."

  "Good man," Dad said.

  "I would have preferred certainty, Dad, but I'm not complaining."

  "He's a good man for being honest with you."

  "And when he finally is certain, you'll know he means it." Mom sighed happily. "I love that boy. I'm so glad everything got worked out."

  "Know what this means?" Dad put on a dour expression. "No more time alone in the house."

  Mom patted his back. "Goes with the territory."

  Dad wrapped his arm around Mom's shoulders and led her back into the den, murmuring softly. They were having a moment. Liv smiled and ran upstairs.

  Once she was ready for bed, she picked up her phone to send a text.

  we r ovr.

  She kept it simple, mostly because she didn't want to think about Jackson long enough to compose something more detailed.

  She hit send.

  He immediately called.

  "What do you mean? What's wrong?" Jackson sounded confused. And pissed.

  Liv sighed. Simple wasn't going to happen. "I heard about your chick at the skate park," she said.

  Brief pause. "So?"

  Not even a little bit of guilt. He just made it that much easier for her. "Uh, okay, cheater--"

  "I didn't cheat. We aren't exclusive."

  "Oh, we aren't. Good to know."

  "C'mon, Liv. We aren't boyfriend and girlfriend yet--"

  "Ever."

  "We're just getting to know each other. There's nothing wrong with dating other people right now."

  "So you rub--" She couldn't say monster "--up against people you're just getting to know all the time?" She was pressing on principal, because really, she was just glad she had an easy out.

  "I care about you. You know I do. But if we aren't exclusive, I'm going to see other people."

  "You should have told me."

  "Oh yeah, I can just picture that conversation."

  Definitely awkward. Still. "You were making out with me--trying to get with me, when I wasn't the only one."

  "Don't be like that. I really like you."

  "And another girl apparently."

  "Liv--"

  "You kiss me, then go and kiss someone else who could have herpes--"

  "They don't have herpes!"

  "They? How many are we talking about here?"

  "It doesn't matter."

  "To you." She paused, trying to find the best thing to say. "Jackson. It's over."

  She could hear him take a deep breath.

  "Homecoming too?"

  "Yeah." She shouldn't say, oh she shouldn't, but it was just too good. "You could always take Ana."

  "Wait. Is that what this is about?"

  Her mind caught the implication. "You hooked up with her too." She deliberately made it sound like she already knew.

  "No. This is about Connor, isn't it?"

  Bingo! Too bad she never liked that game. "This is about you cheating on me. I get I wasn't your girlfriend, but you deliberately mislead me, made me think we were heading toward something, when all the while you were screwing around with herpe-chicks."

  "Okay fine, I'll admit it. I let you think I wasn't seeing anyone else. But you've gotta admit this is also about Connor."

  She really wanted to say, How did you know? "I always said how important he was to me."

  "It's way more than that. Before we even got together he was telling me to stay away.--"

  Her heart sang.

  "Now he suddenly dumps Ana, and you're breaking things off with me... Admit it, Liv."

  "Why?"

  "Because it pisses me off that I was screwed from the beginning."

  "Not by me." She refrained from snickering. "From another chick for sure though, according to Jayden. I mean, out in the open, in a skate park? So wrong. And nasty. Think of all that dirt."

  Somewhere in all that, he got angry.

  "You know
what." Not just angry, make that uber pissed. "Maybe I will take Ana to Homecoming. Or one of the other girls I've been hooking up with since I started dating you."

  Liv gasped an astonished breath. "I am so glad I didn't fall for you. Go. Me."

  She hung up.

  It was satisfying.

  Then it occurred to her that people always got a bad rap for dumping someone through text or the phone. She'd done both. She cringed for a moment, until she remembered that he'd cheated on her. Sort of. So he didn't deserve the courtesy of a face to face.

  Her phone buzzed with a new text. She really hoped it wasn't Jackson.

  i cant wt 2 c u 2mrw.

  Connor.

  She fell asleep with a smile on her face.

  And woke up at the butt-crack of dawn to a ringing phone.

  "Run with me," he said when she answered on the third ring.

  "Or. Give you a kiss to get started."

  He laughed. "Both."

  "Ugh." She rolled out of bed. "Why am I such a sucker for you?"

  "See you when you get down here."

  She dressed quickly and hurried downstairs. He was waiting with three pink roses in his hand. "Not as good as a latte." He wore a nervous smile. "But I didn't want to get unoriginal. That's why these are pink too."

  "Connor," she said softly. "I am really. Really. Crazy about you."

  His nervous smile transformed. He handed the roses to her and wrapped his arm around her waist to pull her in close. His kiss was soft and gentle. An exploration of her mouth. She almost felt as though he was reassuring himself that she were really his.

  When they separated he confirmed it. "I can't believe I get to have you."

  Maybe she was still dreaming.

  She put the roses in water, while he put Darcy on a leash. When they were outside, he kissed her again, and took off running. She laughed and sprinted after him.

  She passed him, and stayed ahead for about a minute. She was starting to feel really pleased with herself and called back breathlessly, "Gotta work on your training!"

  He plowed passed her and left her in the dust.

  He went so fast, Darcy almost couldn't keep up and had nearly disappeared from view before he turned back for her.

  "Yep," Liv said when he joined her again. "Definitely need to work on your training."

  He laughed and kept pace with her. "You run like a girl."

  "I'll take that as a compliment."

  "It definitely is."

  She didn't hate this run.

  They ran back to her house, and then he went on to his to shower. By the time he came back, Liv had showered and was waiting for him--along with her parents.

  When he walked in the door, Mom gave him a hug and Dad pounded him on the back and said, "'Bout time."

  Then life went back to normal. Which was nice and a little weird.

  The Unrequited Love of Her Life was suddenly not Unrequited--the Angels were still singing for Heaven's sake--and yet off they went to the kitchen for breakfast. They shared the same easy talking before a game came on. The real standout difference came when Connor wanted her to watch the game with him.

  She brought a book and curled into his side, and thought it was interesting how the friendship they'd had for years still felt entirely intact, just now with a wonderfully deep undercurrent that tied them that much closer.

  When he left that evening, she walked him completely out of the house instead of just to the door. They stopped at the front of the garage, out of view from the windows.

  He brushed her hair out of her face and stared at her for a moment before softly kissing her. It was over way too quick.

  Liv frowned.

  Connor said, with a laugh, "Your parents are right there."

  "I was that obvious?"

  "I kind of like it."

  He kissed her again, another too-quick-but-still-delicious kiss. "I've been wanting to ask you about something."

  She wasn't sure she liked the sound of that. Especially since he was so clearly uncomfortable. "What is it?"

  "You're...uh...not going to Homecoming with Jackson anymore, right?"

  She forgot she hadn't told him about their conversation. Because she'd completely forgotten about Jackson. Hadn't thought about him at all. "Of course not."

  Relief flashed in his eyes. "Then will you go with me?"

  She smiled. "But you've already seen my dress."

  "I can't wait to see you in it again."

  He said it in a growling sort of way that made her shiver. He immediately shook his head and stepped back. "I'm sorry."

  She blinked in confusion. "For what?"

  All he said was, "I'll see you in the morning." One more soft kiss and he left.

  Liv went inside, still wondering about his hasty apology. She wondered if it had something to do with how...proper he'd been all day. Like one of those Disney movies he accused her of watching, come to life. She figured it was because her parents were around. She hoped it was. Because she didn't want G-rated all the dang time.

  Day one, she reminded herself as she got ready for bed. Connor couldn't know how long she'd wanted to touch him. He always thought her innocent, and she was, but she trusted him enough that she knew she could go all PG-13 on him and stop there.

  Just as she was drifting off to sleep, he texted her. Ive got it bad. Miss u alredy.

  She fell asleep with a smile on her face again.

  The next morning, while they were eating breakfast before school, he said, "Maybe we should hang out somewhere else today."

  "Because of Ana?"

  "And Jackson."

  "Jackson hasn't always been a part of our group. And Ana was gone last week--"

  "She was?"

  Liv took a drink of her tea. "I thought you might have been together."

  He looked at her like she was crazy. "No. Why didn't you ask me?"

  "It never seemed like the right time." She grinned. "Didn't feel like it mattered anyway after you declared your undying almost love for me."

  He laughed but it was a little awkward. "I'm sorry. I don't want to say for sure until--"

  Liv was still smiling as she grabbed his head and pulled him down for a kiss. "You are so adorable."

  She knew he had absolutely no idea what she was talking about/thinking/feeling/referring to. But she knew he got that she wasn't upset with him.

  He convinced her to leave her car at home and ride to school with him. They held hands as they walked on campus. When she saw Ana and Jackson with the rest of the group, Liv let go.

  Connor immediately grabbed her hand again and pulled her toward Jayden's group.

  "Hey, bro. Liv, right?" Jayden greeted them.

  Liv gave him an enormous smile. She liked him already because of how happy he made Chelsea. The dozen text messages she'd gotten from her friend after their date proved it.

  Before Liv could say anything, he said, "Chelsea here yet?"

  "I was just about to call her," Liv whipped out her phone and dialed. "Walk towards the girl's bathroom," she said when Chelsea answered.

  Chelsea was there a moment later. Her eyes widened when she saw Liv and Connor with Jayden. But she got all sorts of happy when she locked gazes with Jayden. Liv was pleased to note that Jayden did too.

  Chelsea casually situated herself next to him and said to Connor, "Good to see you two together."

  "You said 'finally' the other night," Jayden said.

  Chelsea blushed and laughed and playfully nudged him. "You weren't supposed to tell them." She looked back at Connor. "I always knew you two were perfect for each other."

  Jayden's other friends included them in their conversation. Liv had always thought they looked like types who wouldn't want anyone around other than skaters but she realized she was wrong. They were friendly and she didn't feel out of place.

  On their way to the school entrance, she and Connor crossed paths with Ana. Liv started to let go of his hand again, but he held it tighter.


  Ana's face contorted with disgust but Liv saw the agony in her eyes.

  "I knew there was something going on," she spat. "Some friend you are, Liv. Chelsea better watch out before Jayden is next."

  Connor's jaw flexed. "Nothing happened while we were together, Ana."

  She laughed without humor and said to Liv, "Does Jackson even know you ditched him? You don't care how many people you hurt, do you?"

  Liv kept telling herself not to respond. It was getting difficult.

  Connor said, "Liv did nothing to you. And Jackson hurt her."

  The agony in her eyes got worse. "Defending her. You never would have defended me." She abruptly took off, but not before Liv saw tears overflow.

  Connor cupped her cheek and kissed her. "I'm sorry."

  Liv tried to smile. "Not your fault. I'd better get to class." She hurried away.

  Connor worried all morning she would decide he was too much trouble and change her mind.

  He didn't see her at break, and couldn't get her on the phone, and his worry amplified, until he felt like his heart was being crushed.

  When the bell rang for lunch, he walked toward the class he knew she was getting out of. As soon as he saw her, he grabbed her hand and dragged her to the most secluded place he could find. He caught her close and kissed her. His tongue swept in her mouth. His arms were so tight around her that her body was plastered against his.

  When he finally pulled back, Liv slumped against him. "I would definitely like fries with that."

  Connor was still too anxious to laugh. He wanted to ask if she was changing her mind. Wanted to tell her that he wouldn't let her, even though he knew he didn't have a choice. "Where were you at break?"

  "You didn't get my text?"

  She'd texted him? "Did you get mine?"

  "No." She made a disgusted sound. "I keep telling my dad we need to switch providers."

  He was boneless with relief. "I thought--"

  "What?"

  "I bring nothing good to the table."

  She must have finally noticed how anxious he was. "You bring yourself, and that's everything I want."

  He was frozen for a moment. Then he crushed her to him again. "I love you so much, Liv. I thought I was going to lose--"

  "Are you sure?" She pulled back just enough to look at him. "Not 'you think so' but sure?"

  He thought of how wrecked he'd been all morning, thinking he'd lost her. "Liv. I am very, very sure."