Sarah's Solace

by Sarah's Solace (epub)

  I could feel some of the guys staring at Monica and me as we walked in, especially at Monica in my miniskirt. As they eyed us up and down with smiles, a part of me felt flattered while a part of me felt like a piece of meat.

  “So do you see Phil yet?” I asked Monica once we stood at the side of the room, trying to decide what to do next. I had to yell over Guns N’ Roses, but I didn’t mind. I was actually really getting into the music.

  “No, but that’s OK,” she answered. “I could use some courage first anyway.”

  I smirked at her.

  “Just a little bit. I don’t want to be a drunk idiot when I see him,” she explained. “Do you want anything?”

  I shook my head. “I’ll go look around.”

  While Monica headed toward the keg, I scanned the living room and then headed to the kitchen to look for a Pepsi. That’s when I saw them. Leslie and Craig were standing very close, drinks in hand, with Leslie laughing at every word Craig said while he looked at her like he couldn’t wait to get her upstairs.

  I made a quick escape out the back door for a cigarette. I avoided looking them in the eyes, but I knew that they saw me. They were silent for just a moment before Craig whispered something in her ear, and she pretended to hide her giggles.

  Jerk. She could have him.

  I lit up my cigarette as soon as I was out the door. I didn’t smoke much really, and my parents had known about it, but I knew that I needed to quit. My parents didn’t lecture too much, only because they were happy that I didn’t touch alcohol.

  The backyard was also crowded and noisy. It wouldn’t have surprised me if the cops arrived soon.

  “Hey, girl! I was looking all over for you!” Monica said as she snuck up behind me. “I found the keg.” She smiled and sipped from her red plastic cup.

  “I see that,” I said with a smile. “I came out here to get some fresh air. It was getting pretty stuffy in there.”

  “Monica! Oh my God, you’ve gotta come see this!” Sharla Stevens, who always managed to surpass even Monica’s hyperactivity, grabbed Monica’s hand to go back inside.

  “What?” asked Monica. She looked back at me while she was being pulled back in. “You coming?”

  “In a minute. I’m going to finish this first.” I lifted up my cigarette.

  Actually I thought I might just head back home. I wasn’t in the mood to stay. I was fooling myself to think that I might have had a good time.

  I decided to walk around the yard for a moment while I finished my smoke. Some groups of students were laughing and carrying on, while some were coupled up like they were about to start making out, and others already were.

  I quietly passed by Johnny Putman who was bragging about scoring the winning touchdown against our biggest rivalry a couple of years ago. When was he going to stop bragging about that? I rolled my eyes and continued to walk until he said something that got my attention.

  “Yeah, that was the night I thought I was gonna score with Alexis too, but she was such a tease. Now look what happened. She probably died a virgin.”

  Rage could not begin to describe what I was feeling as I marched right up to him. “What the hell is the matter with you, Johnny? How dare you talk about Alexis like that?”

  At this point everyone’s laughter turned to looks of shame, except for Johnny, who still looked smug.

  “Calm down, Sarah. You know I loved Alexis, but I’m just stating the truth. You gotta live for today, because you don’t know what might happen tomorrow.”

  “Yeah, well I’d rather die a virgin than let you put your hands on me!”

  This caused some more laughter among the group.

  “Burn!” one of them yelled.

  “You don’t have to worry about that happening” he answered. “Besides, someone already beat me to it.”

  What? I could feel my face burning with embarrassment. “Screw you, Johnny!”

  It was the best I could come up with before I stormed off. Everyone could go to hell as far as I was concerned. I searched for Monica to let her know that I was leaving and make sure she had a ride home.

  “Are you OK?” she asked. I found her sitting pretty cozy next to Phil. I was happy for her at least.

  “Yeah.” I was a bad liar. “No, not really. I’m heading out. Will you be able to find a ride home?” I glanced at Phil, trying to help her out.

  “I’ll make sure she gets home OK,” he answered. Phil was a sweet guy, and I knew I could trust him.

  “Cool. I’ll see you guys later.”

  “Be careful, Sarah,” Monica reminded me.

  “Yes, Mom.” I smiled and rolling my eyes.

  I got in my car and slammed the door. It wasn’t easy pulling away. So many cars were parked that I had to pull forward then backward several times to get out from between them.

  “God, just let me get out of here!” I said out loud.

  I slowly started to calm down just a little once I was on the road. I didn’t feel like going home yet. I just wanted to drive, play some music, and be alone with my thoughts…or maybe not.

  The radio station unfortunately was playing love ballads. At first, the sad song fit my mood, but as soon as I started tearing up, I searched for another station. Heavy metal was better. I turned it up loud, trying not to think about anything but the music and the beat. At that point I was enjoying the drive. I headed toward the closest country road, rolled my window down a little to get some fresh air, and kept driving.

  I knew that something had to give and soon. I needed to get out of Willows. I needed a change of scenery, a change of life. I wanted to submerge myself into something that would occupy my mind and not give me enough opportunity to think of painful memories. Only where would I go? Would my parents let me go? Would it even work?

  I decided that I would have to take action and research my options. I would open up to my parents, and hopefully they would support me and not be clingy for fear of losing me.

  I tried to concentrate on the music again. I turned it up even louder. It was drizzling outside, so I turned on the wipers. I realized that I probably should head back home, but I wasn’t ready.

  Where were my cigarettes? Weren’t they in my jacket pocket? I felt around the passenger seat. Where was my jacket? Maybe it fell on the floor of my car. I unfastened my seat belt and leaned down to pick it up then put it on my lap. I felt around until I found the cigarettes, but I couldn’t get them out of the pocket. I took my other hand off of the wheel and looked down to unzip it. As I glanced back up, I noticed there was a deer standing in the road right in front of me. My heart jumped out of my chest as I took in a sudden deep breath, feeling nothing but pure fear and adrenaline.

  It’s amazing how everything seems to happen in slow motion in a moment like this. I swear the deer was looking right at me. Why wouldn’t it move? I braced myself and slammed on the breaks. Big mistake.

  3. Crush

  When I woke up and slowly opened my eyes, there was broken glass all over me. I lifted up my head, which was leaning against the steering wheel. Panic hit me when I realized what had happened. I crashed into a tree.

  It all came back to me then. The drive, the deer, trying to stop, and then swerving all over the road. My first thought was that my parents were going to kill me, and then I realized they would be grateful that I survived. I couldn’t believe it myself. Nonetheless, my car was totaled.

  I tried to open my car door, but it wouldn’t budge. I climbed out through the broken windshield and onto what was left of my smashed up hood. I couldn’t believe that I didn’t even feel sore. Talk about lucky. Did I have a guardian angel? I thought of Alexis and smiled for a moment, and then my smile quickly faded.

  “It should have been you who survived, Alexis,” I whispered softly as if she could hear me.

  I took a deep breath, wondering where I was. I obviously had blacked out for a while, because it was almost daylight. I didn’t see any sign of life around me. No houses close by. I could see I was
fairly close to the road, but I didn’t see any cars. So what could I do? Wait by the road? Let some psycho pick me up? I looked around the area again and noticed a trail. I realized that I was at the edge of the forest, but the trail might lead me to something.

  It was a spooky walk. A young woman walking alone in the forest before daylight was never a good idea. However, one couldn’t live in Willows without being aware that it was hunting season. There had to be some hunters around, hopefully not crazy ones, who could take me to a phone. Suddenly, I wished I was wearing some of the fluorescent clothing that Monica always wore. I had forgotten my jacket, but I wasn’t cold.

  After walking for what felt like a couple of miles, I still didn’t see anyone, so I decided to pick up my pace. I had to get help soon. My parents had to be going crazy worrying about me.

  “Hey!” I heard a male voice yell. It scared me to death, especially since I couldn’t see him. I looked all around.

  “Up here!” he yelled.

  I then noticed the camouflaged tree stand he was in.

  “Are you lost? You could get shot out here! Don’t you know it’s hunting season?” he said, appearing really annoyed.

  I could barely see him, but I could tell he was a young guy, maybe just a little older than me.

  “I’m aware of that,” I answered, glaring at him, “but I need some help. I need to get to a phone.”

  “Is someone hurt?” he asked, suddenly concerned.

  “Amazingly, no, I’m not hurt, but I crashed my car.”

  He didn’t answer, but he slowly climbed down and walked toward me. I was speechless as I just stared at him. I was sure I looked like an idiot just staring at him like I was, but he was the most attractive guy I had ever laid eyes on.

  “Sorry to hear that,” he finally answered. “Are you sure you’re OK?”

  “Yeah, I’m fine.”

  He was taller than me, but not so tall that I felt too short. He had short dark hair, but long enough that it fell carelessly over his forehead. He also had the kind of eyes that would make any girl surrender. They were a piercing, deep blue.

  I noticed that he was staring at me as well, but not like he was checking me out. It was more like he was studying me.

  The silence was getting awkward, so I finally spoke. “So can you take me to a phone? I need to call my parents and a tow truck. My car is totaled.”

  “I don’t have a car,” he answered.

  “OK,” I said slowly, letting him know that I thought it was strange. “How did you get here?”

  “I’ve been…out here for a while.”

  That didn’t explain much. I had the feeling he was hiding something.

  He looked away as if he were in deep thought for a moment. “There’s a cabin further up," he explained, “but we’ll have to hike a while to get there. Sorry.”

  “OK, well, I guess that’s my only option.”

  “It’s this way. We just keep following the trail.”

  “Cool, thanks. I appreciate you walking with me. It’s spooky out here.”

  He smiled. His smile was beautiful and sexy. This guy was too good to be true.

  “You’re welcome,” he answered as we started walking. “By the way, what’s your name?”

  “Sarah. What’s yours?”

  “Ethan. Pleased to meet you, Sarah.”

  “You too.”

  “I just wish it were under better circumstances,” he added.

  “Yeah. Really.”

  I suddenly felt guilty again. I should have been thinking of my parents instead of being distracted by the thoughts I was having about this guy.

  We walked in silence for a while, but I couldn’t help glancing at him often. Being close to him felt strange, yet really nice. I felt warm deep inside just being near him. I was usually very leery of people, but I could sense he was looking out for me, even though he was holding back something. I could definitely sense that as well.

  I thought I saw him glance at me occasionally too, making sure that I was still close behind him. I smiled, and he smiled back at me before he spoke. “You seem pretty happy considering you were just in a car accident.”

  “I was just remembering something my friend said earlier,” I answered, thinking again of Monica’s ‘gorgeous’ comment, and that I might meet someone that night.

  “What was that?” he asked.

  “Oh, um, she told me to be careful driving.” She did say that too I suddenly realized. Was Monica psychic?

  “She must have sensed something would happen, or maybe she was worried that you had too much to drink?”

  I stopped smiling. “I wasn’t drunk.”

  He looked at me as if I might not be telling the truth.

  “I don’t drink. My sister was killed by a drunk driver.”

  He looked guilty. “I’m sorry.”

  “It’s OK. It was over a year ago, but you understand the urgency to call my parents.”

  He stopped and turned around, looking very concerned. “You and your sister?”

  “Tell me about it. They are surely thinking the worst right now.”

  “Sarah,” he said as stared at me very intensely. Then abruptly he added, “We better keep walking.”

  He continued to head down the trail with me following behind. We walked for a good while. It became daylight, but there was overcast.

  “We’re almost there,” he finally said.

  “Thank God,” I answered.

  “Well, I wouldn’t say that.” He pointed to the small cabin nestled in the woods.

  I followed him to the door, for which he had a key.

  “So this is your cabin?” I asked.

  “Yeah, well, it belongs to my father, but he doesn’t come out here anymore.” He seemed sad about that. “It’s a good location, though, secluded but not too far from the county road.”

  I was glad to hear we weren’t too far from civilization. Close enough to have a phone at least. It was a very small cabin, with just some necessities, but it was cozy.

  “So where’s the phone?” I asked.

  He pointed to it, and I quickly started calling my parents, but there was no answer.

  “Damn!” I let out deep breath of frustration.

  “No answer?” he asked.

  I started to tear up, but tried to keep it together in front of him.

  He tried to console me. “They’re probably out looking for you. Don’t they have an answering machine?”

  “The stupid thing broke last week, and they hadn’t bought a new one yet.”

  Suddenly my brain started working again. Monica. I quickly dialed her number, and her mother answered.

  “Mrs. Richards! This is Sarah!”

  “Hello?” she said again.

  “This is Sarah! Can you hear me?”

  “Hello,” she said again, sounded irritated. Then she hung up.

  “I don’t believe this!” I yelled as I slammed down the phone. “Who should I try next?” I asked myself out loud.

  “It won’t do any good,” he said sadly. “There must be a problem with the phone.”

  “Great. So what do I do now?”

  “I think you should rest, considering you were in a car accident and then went hiking for miles.”

  “How can I rest when my parents are worried? By the way, how did you get to the forest without a car?”

  “I got a ride.”

  “When are they coming back?”

  “I don’t know.”

  I was getting more and more frustrated. “So how long were you planning on staying out here by yourself?”

  “I didn’t plan on staying…like this,” he explained.

  I shook my head in disbelief. “Look, I really need your help,” I told him, tearing up again.

  “I know. Give me your parents’ and friends’ phone numbers. I’ll go find a phone.”

  “I don’t want to stay here by myself!”

  “I’ll hurry back. Try to take it easy,” he said as he placed h
is hand on mine for a moment.

  His touch was comforting and warm. I felt bad for getting so irritated. It wasn’t his fault, but I sure wish I knew what his story was. I wrote the numbers on a piece of paper and handed it to him.

  Before he was almost out the door, he turned to me. “Promise me you won’t leave this cabin.”

  “Where am I going to go?”

  “Just promise me. I promise I’ll be back.”

  “OK. I promise.”

  “Looks like it might rain,” he announced as he stepped outside. “I’ll hurry back.”

  I was actually really nervous about him leaving. “Ethan, wait!”

  “What is it?”

  “Do you have a cigarette?” I asked.

  He chuckled. “No, I don’t.” Then he said more seriously, “You’ll be alright, Sarah.”

  I sat inside for what seemed like a long time, just trying to make sense of everything. I felt as if I were living in a nightmare. The only good thing about all of it was meeting Ethan.

  I wandered around the cabin. I didn’t want to snoop, but he was so mysterious. I wanted to learn more about him. The waiting was driving me crazy.

  There wasn’t much to look at, though, just a couple of beds, a few cabinets, and a wood burning stove. There were some canned goods and bottled water, but I wasn’t at all hungry or thirsty. Then I noticed a picture of Ethan with an older man in their hunting gear. I assumed the man was his father. Ethan looked really happy.

  I picked up the only book I saw. It was a book on how to dress a deer. Not really my thing. I decided to lie down on the bed and try to rest, like Ethan suggested. I closed my eyes and waited.

  After a while, I heard the sound of thunder and lightning. I looked out the window and realized that Ethan was right. It was pouring down rain, storming actually. Where was he? So much for wanting to get out of Willows. I couldn’t even get out of the woods.

  A few minutes later, I finally heard a key turning in the door. Ethan rushed in.