She dragged the rolling door open. “Couldn’t you join an already established practice?”
He led Tater Tot into the barn but stopped in the hallway, waiting for Shannon as she secured the barn door. “You’re right, I could.” And he had, initially, but the head veterinarian had been driven by numbers, booking appointments on top of each other so none of the doctors had time to provide quality care to the animals. The rush had led to mistakes. Carter had left after a misdiagnosis on his part led to a family pet having to be euthanized. Besides, after growing up under the thumbs of his father and then his stepfather, the thought of placing the control of his career into someone else’s hands didn’t sit well with him. “There are a couple of things I hope to do before settling down, so that’s a part of my choice, too.”
“What type of things?” She passed him and held open the door to Tater Tot’s stall.
Carter chuckled, shaking his head. “You’re just full of questions tonight, aren’t you?”
She rolled her eyes.
He unhooked the lead rope from Tater Tot’s halter and left the horse in his stall to rest. Hopefully, they had worn him down with all the walking and the gelding would fall asleep and wake up on the other side of his bout with colic.
Carter looped the rope over his shoulder. “There was this overseas study program with Veterinarians Without Borders offered my last year at school. They travel all over the world and care for animals in remote places. You get all sorts of hands-on experience with rare animals and illnesses. It’s a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.” He might as well tell her why he didn’t end up doing the program. Because this was Shannon, after all, and she would ask if he didn’t come right out and tell her. “You needed supporters for the program and I wasn’t able to raise the funds, so I didn’t get to go.” He fiddled with the end of the rope. “Dr. Spira did give me paperwork for another similar program the other day. It’s a Christian organization where you go on a three-month-long veterinarian mission trip and assist people with their animals but also talk to them about God. They’re accepting applicants for an Africa trip and a South America trip.”
Shannon lifted the rope from his shoulder. “That sounds like a great program. You should apply.” She hung the rope on a peg along the wall. He hadn’t realized he was following her so closely, but when she turned around they were only inches apart. Her breath caught, and in what must have been a reflex motion, her hands came to rest on his chest. She looked up at him, meeting his gaze, and she didn’t pull away. “You deserve to chase after your dreams, Carter. I get the feeling no one’s ever told you that.”
He had only ever dreamed of making something of himself, but here, with Shannon so close, that dream suddenly felt small and insignificant. For thirteen years Carter had kept his heart safe. By focusing on school and the future he had avoided relationships of all kinds. Because if life had taught him one thing, it was that he was better off alone.
But her words had made him light-headed for a second. Or maybe it was simply how long he had been awake and the amount of caffeine buzzing through his bloodstream that was making his head spin.
Tired. That was all this was. And nothing more.
* * *
Shannon absently shoved chicken pesto pasta around on her plate. She couldn’t stop thinking about everything she and Carter had talked about while they were taking care of Tater Tot last night. And not just talking. She had a suspicious feeling that they had come close to kissing at least twice.
What was going on?
After what she had endured with Cord, she wasn’t ready for a relationship. Honestly, she didn’t know if she would ever be able to trust her heart again. And certainly not with a man she had only just met and who she had to pry personal information from. Carter was her friend.
Just a friend.
He was helping her plan the horse show because Rhett had asked him to, not because he wanted to spend time with her. Any more, people didn’t choose Shannon when they had free time—not her brothers or their wives, not her friends from church, because she had lost them all while dating Cord.
And certainly not Carter.
After all, she had imposed on his time at the barn last night. Not the other way around. Hearing about his past had made her feel closer to him, but she had to remember that she had all but forced him to tell her those things. It wasn’t as if he was readily offering information. And Carter hadn’t gone out of his way to know her.
No one cares about what you have to say.
Everyone would be disappointed if they knew the real you.
She pressed her hand to her forehead. Any almost kisses she thought had happened were in her imagination. Shannon laid her fork down, her appetite gone.
In the past few months, she had thought about joining a support group for survivors of domestic violence but hadn’t done so yet. Maybe it was time. She had the number for a local group in her bunkhouse and she would call them today. She wanted better mental and emotional tools at her disposal so she could cleave and separate out Cord’s voice and the lies he had fed her from her own thoughts. She wanted to be healthy. Not for Carter—they had only just met and he probably didn’t think of her as anything beyond his boss’s annoying sister—but for herself. She wanted to be well and whole and if a man did come along someday, she wanted to be ready. She wasn’t right now, but she could be if she did the work and healed.
Thickness coated her throat and she blinked rapidly. She hadn’t felt a surge of hope this strong since she realized Rhett had made it through the tornado last year.
Shannon and Carter had plans to distribute flyers for the horse show in town together tomorrow. He had confessed that he was decent at drawing and was supposed to get the design to her this evening. Perhaps she would go back to her bunkhouse and sneak in a nap before then.
She stifled a yawn.
Wade dropped onto the seat beside her and poked her in the ribs. “You slept through breakfast and have yawned your way through lunch—what gives?”
Seated across from them, Rhett lifted his head, clearly listening in on their conversation. As head chef, Cassidy was busy in the kitchen and Rhett had told them earlier that Macy was at home resting. Due to her pregnancy, she had been very tired recently.
Stifling another yawn, Shannon laid down a fork. “Tater Tot had colic, so Carter and I stayed up to take care of him.” She stretched her arms. “I think that was my first all-nighter since high school.” She yawned again. “Feeling my age today.”
Wade closed his eyes and put out one of his hands. “Hold up.” He opened his eyes, his brow lowering. “The head wrangler? You spent all night with him...alone?”
Of course her brother would jump to the absolute worst conclusion. “Um, the horse was there. And Wing Crosby and Sheep and Romeo, too.”
Wade’s frown deepened. “Animals don’t count in this equation.” He swung in his seat so he was facing her. “Listen, I love you, Shannon, but we don’t know this guy beyond his credentials and he could have done anything—”
“Carter is a good guy,” Shannon said, cutting off whatever he was about to say. Wade was usually the most patient and understanding of her siblings, but he had stood shoulder to shoulder with her in the trenches when she broke up with Cord. He had seen the worst of it, so of course he would be hyperaware of any potential threats to her now. She loved her twin so much but she wanted him to know he didn’t have to worry about her. By now he should know he would be the first person in the family she would run to when she needed help.
“He seems decent so far, but we’ve been burned by staff members before.” Wade snapped his fingers. “Are you hearing this, Rhett? She spent the night alone with your new wrangler.” Rhett’s eyebrows rose as Wade kept talking. “What all do we know about him?”
Elbows on the table, Rhett pressed one of his fists to his lips. “We verified his credentials and work hist
ory and he had to be fingerprinted since he’s working with juveniles.”
Wade tapped the table. “Couldn’t we have Donnelley do some checking?”
Jack Donnelley had grown up in the foster system and during that time Red Dog Ranch had been a big part of his life. Their father had personally mentored Jack and he had often been treated as a part of the family. In the last year, Jack had become one of Rhett’s best friends. If Shannon remembered correctly, Jack was now a sergeant in the aircraft operations division for the Texas Department of Public Safety. A lot of words to say he had the means and ability to do some checking as long as he had signed permission allowing him to do so. And everyone who worked for Red Dog Ranch signed the form saying that clearance checks could be conducted on them if the need arose.
Covering her face, Shannon groaned. “You guys, don’t. Just please, don’t. Carter is only a friend and you have nothing to worry about.”
Wade pried her hands away from her face and gave them a gentle squeeze. “I don’t ever want to see you hurt like you were again.”
“I’m a big girl, Wade.” Shannon slipped her hands out of his hold. “I can take care of myself.”
“I know you can.” Wade nodded. “But that doesn’t mean I still can’t look out for you. Shannon,” Wade said, leaning forward. “I will always look out for you. For the rest of my life. That’s my job as your twin, your brother and your friend. I care about what happens to you and I’m going to be worried about any guy you hang around.”
How was it possible to want to both hug and throttle her brother at the same time? He was so sweet but he was also making her doubt herself.
Rhett sighed heavily. “Carter is a great employee but I don’t know how he is on a relational level. We just want to make sure you’re being careful with your heart, Shannon. Carter is the first single guy we’ve hired here since your breakup with Cord.”
“I broke up with him nine months ago. And Carter... Carter’s a great guy. He’s the first person outside family who has helped me find my strength after everything.” She hadn’t felt more confident in herself and her choices since long before Cord Anders entered her life.
Wade and Rhett exchanged a worried glance.
Rhett sighed. “Your strength is yours, Shannon. You don’t get it from some guy.”
“I know that.” Sometimes talking to them was like running up against a brick wall. She wished Boone was home because he was more rational. He wouldn’t jump to the same conclusions as Wade and Rhett. “But sometimes we need to be reminded. Isn’t that the whole reason why God says we’re supposed to live in community? So when we’re struggling or doubting something, a friend can point us in the right direction and remind us about what is true?” She stressed the word friend.
It was high school all over again. They might be well-intentioned, but she wasn’t a kid any longer. Their protective-bear mentalities had ruined all of her friendships with guys when she was a teenager but she wasn’t about to let them wreck whatever tentative relationship was beginning between her and Carter.
Now would have been the perfect time to follow Carter’s advice and tell them exactly how their actions made her feel, but she chickened out at the last moment. Wade and Rhett loved her and they would never hurt her. Besides, when she did finally get up the nerve to have that conversation with them, she wouldn’t have it in the middle of the dining hall surrounded by other staff.
Shannon shoved up from the table. She wanted to run to the big house and talk to her mother. Growing up, she’d found that their mom always had the best advice. If Shannon told her everything about Carter, Mom would know exactly what to say.
Shannon reeled back around, her gaze directed at Rhett. “How’s Mom today?”
Rhett rose slowly. “Regarding that, there’s something I need to talk to you about. Wade already knows.”
Shannon’s gaze ricocheted between her brothers. “Wade already knows what?”
Rhett motioned for her to follow him outside. Even with his much longer stride, she kept pace beside him. Rhett cleared his throat. “Mom’s getting worse. These last few months—her decline has been sharp.”
Shannon nodded. Even with nurses on staff to care for their mother, Shannon knew the situation was a lot for Macy and Rhett to handle since she lived in the big house with them. Any more, her bad days far outnumbered the good ones and she had recently become an escape artist, slipping away from her nurse to wander the ranch. Even with a GPS watch she wore that linked to an app on Rhett’s phone, their mom had wandered into dangerous situations.
“What are you trying to tell me?” Shannon hugged her middle.
Rhett rubbed the back of his neck. “Wade and I think it’s time to consider moving Mom to a memory-care facility. Somewhere that’s better set up to provide a safe place for her.”
The muscles across her back tensed as she worked her jaw back and forth. “Are you sure this is about what’s best for Mom and not about what’s best for you?”
“Shannon.” Rhett flinched and lowered his head. The action made Shannon want to take back her words.
But she was tired and her emotions were running high. Her voice shook a little. “Because first you shoved me out of the house I’ve lived in my whole life. And now you think it’s best for Mom to be moved elsewhere conveniently when you have a baby on the way.”
“I’m sorry if I made you feel that way.” He met her gaze with a long, pained look before finally breaking eye contact. “But that’s not fair. You know I want what’s best for her and I want what’s best for you, too.”
“Being in her home is what’s best for her, Rhett.” Rhett reached out but Shannon sidestepped him. “I have to go. There’s a lot to get done for the horse show.”
Rhett ran his hand over his jaw. “We’ll talk more later. I love you, Shannon. I love you so much.”
Shannon jammed her hands into her pockets to keep Rhett from noticing her arms were shaking, and then she headed to her bunkhouse. She knew he loved her and she loved him, but love didn’t mean she couldn’t be upset with him.
Minutes ago she had been filled with hope, but it was quickly trickling out of her. Sadly, hope was like a balloon—beautiful when full and floating, but easily busted and guaranteed to leave a person deflated in the end.
Chapter Seven
The next day, Carter discovered that the Spiras were an animated couple who had recently celebrated their fiftieth wedding anniversary. When Carter had told Dr. Spira that he and Shannon were going to be in town, the vet had insisted on them coming over for dinner.
Carter and Shannon had spent the afternoon entering every business in town to let people know about the upcoming horse show, see if they were interested in signing up for a vendor booth and asking permission to hang a flyer in their storefront windows. Much of Stillwater was now effectively wallpapered with advertisements for the horse show.
After they arrived, Shannon had stayed in the kitchen with Dr. Spira, but Carter followed Mrs. Spira into a wide sitting room. A rich, super sweet aroma wafted through the air.
Carter sucked in a lungful of the delicious scent. “Whatever you guys are cooking, it smells delicious. Thanks again for having us.”
“That would be Paul’s pecan pie. He’s won the blue ribbon at the county fair for that recipe four years running.” She leaned forward in a conspiratory manner. “But don’t tell him I told you that. It’ll go to his head and he’ll start making pies every week.” She put a hand to her chest. “And I love pecan pie as much as the next person, but a body gets tired of eating the same dessert all the time.”
“I think it would take me a long time to get sick of something that smelled that good.”
“Give it fifty years and you just might.” She grinned, letting him know all the teasing was good-natured. It was clear she loved her husband. She gestured toward a wall of photos hanging above a blue couch. “Al
l my grandchildren.” She folded her hands. “Most of them live near Galveston. I so wish they were nearer.”
“Have you ever considered moving?”
She sighed. “Paul would have to give up the practice first, of course.”
There must have been sixty different framed pictures on the wall. Carter leaned closer. A photo on the edge had Dr. and Mrs. Spira and five grown-ups, all with their arms around each other. Carter assumed those must have been their children. A large picture in the middle showed the doctor and his wife surrounded by seventeen kids.
“That one’s old.” She came up beside him. “There have been two more since that photo was taken and we have another grandbaby on the way.”
Every single picture showed children happy and loved and thriving. What would it have been like to grow up in such a family? His life could have been so different. Carter’s throat burned. “You have a beautiful family.”
“I’ve been incredibly blessed.” She touched his shoulder. “Paul says you two have been talking on the phone each day. I think it’s lovely.”
Carter ducked his head. Since their first meeting, the doctor had been calling him each day under the guise of discussing interesting cases he thought Carter could learn from. But each talk turned into speaking about other things, too. While Carter had never felt comfortable opening up to someone his own age, the older man had treated him in a grandfatherly way that had loosened Carter’s lips. He had ended up telling Spira about his family and his upbringing. Carter had also confessed to him that he lacked both the funds and the confidence to start his own practice at the moment. And Spira had listened to everything without any judgment in his voice.
Their easy conversations might have been what had propelled Carter to call his father the other day. If he could talk so effortlessly to a veritable stranger, then it stood to reason that he should be able to have a meaningful relationship with his own father.
The Wrangler's Last Chance Page 9
