“Why? For falling in love? I wouldn’t call that stupid. I’d call it being human. And God knows you haven’t allowed yourself to be human in a long time.”
“Yeah, well, look what it’s done for me,” she said in a voice heavy with sarcasm.
“As far as I can see you’re still upright and breathing.”
She grimaced. “I don’t care about me anymore. It’s my darling little Hannah that worries me. She wants a father so much. She wants siblings. And when I started dating Sawyer, I could see her getting her hopes up. Now—I just can’t bring myself to tell her that Sawyer is out of our lives.”
“Damn it, Viv! You’re not going to tell her any such thing. You’re going to get a grip on yourself and quit being a fraidy-cat. If you really love Sawyer then you need to put your fears behind you and go after him. Grab on to him and don’t let go.”
Her tears vanished as she stared incredulously at her brother. “Fraidy-cat! Just where do you come off calling me that? And you have no business telling me what to do about my love life. You’re the biggest tomcat that’s ever prowled the state of Arizona.”
He chuckled. “That’s a mighty big area. But thank you for the compliment.”
“You’re insufferable! And you make me furious! And I—” The cocky smile on his face doused her anger and suddenly she was laughing and sobbing at the same time. “I love you, Holt.”
He drew her up from the chair and hugged her. “Of course you do. And you love Sawyer, too. I could see that even before he came to visit Three Rivers. Don’t pass this chance by, my sister. Or you’ll regret it from now on.”
Holt was right. She truly did love Sawyer. And if she didn’t fight for him now, she might as well tattoo the word coward across her forehead and cry away the rest of her life.
She kissed her brother’s cheek. “Thank you, Holt. Let’s go in and see if there’s any of Reeva’s coconut cake left. If I’m going to put my fighting gloves on tomorrow I’m going to need my strength.”
He laughed. “Now you’re talking, sister!”
* * *
The next morning, Sawyer was up early, hammering steeples into the fence posts surrounding his grandmother’s chicken house, when he caught the sound of Nashota’s voice behind him.
“I think you’ve driven enough steeples to hold that wire in place for the next ten years.”
Lowering the hammer, he turned around to see she was dressed for going out. “I don’t want it to sag. If a coyote sees a space he can get through, he’ll take it. Then you won’t have a hen left.”
Moving closer, she frowned at him. “You’re going overboard with precautions, Sawyer. When are you going to start trusting yourself?”
Trusting himself? What did that have to do with keeping these damned laying hens safe from coyotes?
The morning was unusually warm for January, causing sweat to collect on his forehead. He used the forearm of his sleeve to wipe it away before he said, “I want things protected.”
“Yes,” she said sagely. “Especially your feelings. I’ve always known that.”
Bemused by her offhand remarks, he shook his head. “What are you doing dressed like that? Are you and Anita going to town?”
She clasped her hands together. “No. Anita has gone to Flagstaff to see her daughter. You’re going to take me.”
Other than the monthly market at Camp Verde where she sold the jewelry she crafted, his grandmother rarely went anywhere. And he knew for a fact that the market wasn’t going on this weekend.
“I am, am I? Where to? The grocery store?”
“No. We’re going to Three Rivers Ranch. That is where Vivian and her daughter live.”
If Sawyer hadn’t been leaning against the cedar fence post, he would have fallen face forward. “Grandmother, what in the hell has come over you? We’re not going to Three Rivers! And that’s that!”
The look she gave him made Sawyer glad she didn’t have a hoe or rake in her hand. Otherwise she would’ve been flogging him with the wooden handle.
“You have never told me no before,” she said flatly. “And you are not about to start now. Go change your clothes. We’re going.”
Frustration swamped him, yet he did his best to hold on to his temper. “You don’t understand, Grandmother! Viv and I aren’t seeing each other anymore. That’s why I transferred away from Lake Pleasant. So I wouldn’t have to see her. I don’t want to go to Three Rivers and be humiliated all over again.”
“I know why you aren’t at Lake Pleasant. And I know why you ran away from Vivian.”
He didn’t know where or how his grandmother got her information. She rarely used the phone and she didn’t often question him about his personal life. Yet somehow she seemed to know these things about him without him saying a word.
He let out a cynical grunt. “I don’t call it running away. I call it using good sense.”
Ignoring that, she said, “For years you’ve believed you would end up like your father—hurt by an unhappy woman. I’ve never tried to change your mind because I could see the women you dated were not important to you. Now you’re in love and I can see you are hurting. The pain won’t go away until you show Vivian what’s really in your heart.”
He studied his grandmother’s wise face as her advice circled around in his tortured thoughts. The pain inside him wouldn’t go away, he conceded. Not unless he had Vivian back in his arms.
“Vivian is from a wealthy family. She has everything she wants or needs.”
“She doesn’t have you.”
Sawyer groaned as he felt his resistance crumbling like a piece of old adobe.
“All right, Grandmother. I’ll take you to Three Rivers. But don’t be embarrassed when Vivian orders me off the place.”
“When you get as old as I am, Sawyer, you don’t get embarrassed.”
Sawyer tossed the hammer he’d been holding into a wooden toolbox, then reached for his grandmother’s arm.
“We’d better get started. It’s a long way from here to Three Rivers.”
In more ways than one, he thought ruefully. But could Nashota be right? Could Vivian want him just as much or more than everything she had at Three Rivers? He’d soon find out.
Chapter Fourteen
Vivian glimpsed at her image in the vanity mirror one last time. A pair of skinny jeans, cowboy boots and a bright yellow sweater wasn’t exactly a romantic outfit or one that shouted seduction. But this trip to the reservation to see Sawyer wasn’t about luring him to his uncle’s old house for a romp in the bed.
She had to use this opportunity to convince him that she truly cared about him. She had to make him realize they were meant to be together and that nothing about their pasts, or age difference, or the money in their bank accounts should stand between them.
With a determined glint in her eye, she turned away from the mirror and grabbed her handbag and jacket off the bed.
She was halfway down the staircase when her mother appeared at the bottom step.
“Viv, are you ready to leave?”
Vivian paused. “Yes. Why? The kids aren’t whining to go with me, are they?”
“Oh, no. They both understand you need to be alone when you see Sawyer today. In fact, they’ve already left with Matt to go gather cattle.”
Vivian breathed a sigh of relief as she descended the remaining stairs to join her mother. “That’s great. So was there something else?”
“I know you’re in a hurry to leave, but I need a favor—if you don’t mind.”
Vivian couldn’t believe her mother was doing this. “What is it?”
She held up a manila envelope. “Blake is already at his office to meet a cattle buyer and he needs these registration papers so they can be attached to the transfers. Can you run them down to the ranch yard for me?”
Vivian frowned while thinking t
his whole favor of hers sounded contrived. Blake never forgot things he needed, and if he did, he’d walk back to the house to fetch them himself.
“I suppose I can take them.”
Maureen handed her the envelope. “I realize you’re in a bit of a hurry and I’d do it myself, but my knee is giving me fits. I twisted it yesterday when I was climbing out of the saddle.”
Vivian’s skepticism grew. Less than thirty minutes ago, she’d seen her mother racing through the kitchen with the spryness of a twenty-year-old. Obviously Maureen was trying to detain her for some reason. A fact that hardly made sense, but she wasn’t going to waste more time pressing her mother on the matter.
“Don’t worry, Mom. I’ll get them right to him and then I’ll leave.” She leaned over and kissed her mother’s cheek. “Wish me luck.”
“I wish you all the luck in the world, darling. Drive safely.”
Vivian dashed away and walked in record time to Blake’s office. The cattle buyer had already arrived and with the two men in deep discussion, she discreetly placed the envelope on the corner of her brother’s desk and made a quick exit.
She was halfway back to the front of the house when she spotted a pickup truck rounding the circular drive. Most all the visitors who had business dealings with the ranch drove straight to the ranch yard rather than stop in front of the house. Which made her suspect her mother was about to receive company.
Hurrying forward, her thoughts strayed to Sawyer and exactly what she was going to say to him. She didn’t expect anything about seeing him again to be easy. No. She figured his initial reaction would be to tell her to get lost. But she wasn’t going to let that put her off. Her love for him was too deep, too precious to simply toss away as though it could be easily replaced. Nothing about her feelings for Sawyer could ever be replaced.
She was almost to her vehicle when she caught a glimpse of her mother walking across the front porch and down the steps. Without the slightest hitch in her knee, Vivian thought wryly.
Curious, her gaze strayed to the truck that had parked near the front gate and suddenly she stopped dead in her tracks.
It was Sawyer! And Nashota was with him! What were they doing here?
Her heart suddenly hammering out of control, she moved slowly forward until she was standing a few feet away from where her mother was welcoming Nashota with a hug.
Was this why Maureen had been trying to detain her? Because she knew Sawyer and his grandmother were coming? But why? How?
Her mind whirling with questions and a faint ray of hope, she forced herself to join them.
“There you are,” Maureen said, acknowledging Vivian’s arrival. “As you can see we have company.”
She darted a wary glance at Sawyer before gathering Nashota in a gentle hug.
“Hello, Nashota,” she said. “It’s wonderful to see you again.”
She patted Vivian’s cheek. “I’m happy to see you again, too.”
Before anything else could be said, Maureen took the older woman by the arm. “Let’s go inside, Nashota, and leave these two to talk.”
Stunned by this turn of events, Vivian watched the two women disappear into the house before she turned back to Sawyer. His expression was stoic, almost like he was numb. Vivian couldn’t blame him. Not when she felt just as numb.
“I don’t understand, Sawyer. What are you doing here?”
He glanced in the direction of the house. “I think I’ve been manipulated by a pair of women.”
Her heart sank. “Oh. I thought—” She broke off as all the words she’d been rehearsing in her mind flew away with the wind.
A pained look came over his face. “Thought what? That I should know better than to return to Three Rivers?”
Seeing that his thinking was still way off track, she stepped closer, while trying to collect her scattered senses. “No. Actually, I was about to climb into my truck to head to your house. But I think—Mom must have known you were coming. She sent me off on a useless errand to detain me.”
A look of disbelief washed over his face. “You were coming to my house? Why?”
She groaned as her composure began to break. “To...try to make you understand that I...don’t want to go on without you in my life, Sawyer.”
His brown eyes studied her for long, tense moments and then with a needy groan, his hands reached for her shoulders. She stumbled into his arms and buried the side of her face into the middle of his chest.
“Viv! I thought—I never expected you to want to see me again!”
“I know that’s what you wanted. That’s what you had planned when you asked Mort for the transfer, but—”
“You were right, Viv, when you called me a coward and a user. That’s exactly what I’ve been for all my adult years.” His arms tightened around her. “When I met you I believed everything would be fun and games with us. Just like it had always been with me. But something crazy happened to me along the way. I fell in love with you. And it scared the hell out of me. On Christmas Day—”
“I thought you were happy that day,” she interrupted. “I thought it felt as magical to you as it did to me. And then the next day at work I could feel something was wrong.”
With a thumb beneath her chin, he tilted her face up to his.
“That was me running scared, Viv. And to be honest, I’m still scared. I don’t know anything about being a husband or father. All I know about marriage is that it made my parents miserable. But I had to come see you this morning, anyway. Because I love you. Because somehow I want us to try to fit our lives together. Not just for a while but for always.”
Her heart spilling over with love, she cupped her hands around his dear, familiar face. “I love you, too, Sawyer. So very much. And you weren’t the only one of us who was frightened. All I could think was that I was falling for a man who didn’t need a woman who was six years older than him. Especially one with a daughter nearing her teenage years.”
He smiled and the sight of it chased away all the doubts and fears that tormented her this past week without him.
“Those six extra years look mighty beautiful on you, Viv. And as for Hannah, I’m going to try my best to be the father she deserves. And a good father to the other children we’ll hopefully be blessed with.”
Happy tears filled her eyes. “How did this happen? You never intended to be a family man.”
“This past week and a half without you has shown me that being a family man is the only thing I’ll ever want to be.”
Laughing, she pulled his head down so that she could give his lips a long, lingering kiss.
When it finally ended, she said, “You know, when Nashota told you the job at Lake Pleasant was going to bring you great fortune, she was actually wrong. It brought the great fortune to me.”
“No, my darling. To the both of us.”
The smile on her face came from deep within her heart. “Yes, to the both of us,” she agreed, then slipping an arm across the back of his waist, she urged him toward the house.
Epilogue
Six months later on a hot July evening, the Hollisters were not only celebrating Independence Day, but also the birth of Katherine and Blake’s twins. Three nights ago, Andrew and Abigail had arrived right on schedule and since then, Blake had been practically guarding the door of the nursery to make sure the babies weren’t disturbed by his big, doting family.
As for Vivian and Sawyer, they’d gotten married back in January in the little church on the reservation where Sawyer had attended services since he was a small boy. The ceremony had been simple, but especially lovely with the nave and sanctuary decorated with sunflowers, a symbol of happiness for Apaches. After they’d spoken their vows, the minister had prayed the Apache wedding prayer and in that moment, as the beautiful words had poured over her, Vivian had no doubt that she was with the right man. And he would love he
r for the rest of their lives.
After the wedding, she and Sawyer had managed to get a few days off from work to spend a quiet honeymoon in Flagstaff. Once it was over, she and Hannah had moved in with Sawyer and Nashota in their little house on the Camp Verde reservation.
At first Vivian had been worried her daughter might resist moving away from Nick and the horses, but surprisingly she’d been all for the idea. Since then, Sawyer had built a barn and corral large enough for Hannah to keep two horses and with Nick being a frequent visitor, Hannah seemed more than content with her new home. She had a father now, whom she loved dearly.
“What are you doing sitting here by yourself?” Sawyer asked as he joined her beneath the shade of a cottonwood tree. “Holt says the homemade ice cream is almost ready.”
Vivian laughed. “You can’t trust what he says. He’s too impatient to wait until it’s completely frozen.”
Sawyer surveyed the crowd of family and friends bunched around the patio. “Take a look over there. In the glider,” he said, pointing a discreet finger at an area of lawn behind the patio. “Grandmother and Sam are really hitting it off. Who would’ve thought?”
Vivian eyed the old couple, who were sitting with their heads together, talking up a storm. “I hope he hasn’t offered her any whiskey yet,” Vivian said with a chuckle.
Rising from the lawn chair, she reached for her husband’s hand and squeezed his fingers. “Are you having a good time?”
“I always have a super time when I’m with your family. To be honest, I’m still in shock that Mort gave both of us the day off. The park is running over with guests. And it’s taking every ranger on the roster to make sure no firecrackers are set off to create wildfires.”
So far Vivian and Sawyer were still working together at Lake Pleasant. To their surprise and delight, Mort had secretly torn up Sawyer’s request for a transfer. However, Sawyer had recently finished his college studies and was considering the management job at Dead Horse Ranch Park.
A Ranger For Christmas (Linda Lael Miller Presents; Men 0f The West Book 40) Page 19
