by Susan Reid
This year though, as sophomores, we vowed for more space and privacy. We joined finances to snag a two-bedroom apartment separate from the dorms even though it was still considered ‘on campus living’ since it wasn’t far from the University. China was like a mother hen to me, self-proclaimed actually, given my life circumstances, and though it drove me crazy. I wouldn’t change a thing between us.
III: Starling:
Professor Phillips’ office wasn’t that far from the auditorium where he taught. I had taken the scenic route and took my time at that on purpose.
This corridor wasn’t as busy, but it did maintain a steady flow of traffic since the student store slash textbook and supply store was a part of the cul-de-sac that merged with a row of small franchise eateries. Pizza hut, Subway and several coffee and bagel shops formed a diminutive food court before the set of steps and the extensive, wide corridor that housed a lengthy line of administration offices.
The smell of fresh roasted coffee beans was inviting, since it was chilly this morning now that fall had settled in. It made me debate stopping for a cup and taking even more time to finish it before knocking on his door. I would have if I didn’t want to get this over with. Why did I care anyway? If he didn’t like my paper, it was his opinion. I thought it was good. I put three weeks of research into it. Okay, maybe technically just a week.
I stopped in front of his closed office door, seeing him through the small rectangle of semi-obscure glass set above the door knob. He was sitting at his desk, on the phone when he saw me and beckoned me to come in with the pen he held in his hand.
I hesitated at first, eyeing him to see if I could notice anything peculiar about his expression as I sighed and slowly turned the knob. He was ending his conversation once I stepped inside the warmth of his office. It was a typical, neat and orderly office. Nothing fancy, but many of his degrees, certifications and pictures of his dog were tacked up on one wall that housed a waist high, long bookshelf lined with large bound volumes of encyclopedias and other numerous miscellaneous textbooks and literature. There were two dark-brown standard vinyl chairs placed in front of his plain cherry wood school issued desk, which was equally as tidy as the rest of the office. His orderly desk housed a computer, office phone, a stack of papers, clear report binders, a desk lamp and a small Styrofoam cup of coffee that was still steaming.
I recognized my ten-page essay beneath his elbow with several red marks on the first page alone and no grade so far, so maybe he really did want to discuss my paper. I guess I was just being paranoid. I relaxed a bit, still watching his face as he said good-bye to whoever was on the phone and then placed the receiver in its cradle.
“Miss Roberts, sit down please. Would you like some coffee?” he then offered.
I didn’t trust his tone even if it were slightly more pleasant than it had been during class. I shook my head no while slowly letting my backpack slide down my arm and catching it in my hand as I lowered myself into one of the chairs across from him.
He gave a wide smile that gave me a slight shiver, for some reason, “I’m glad you came; it shows you do have hope yet.” He then commented as he picked up my paper, opened the clear report cover and glazed over it for a moment.
I took that opportunity to carefully study him, to see if I could pick up anything that could be deemed...strange other than his usual façade since seeing that dark shadow disappeared into him during class.
So far, he was being decent so maybe it had left him after all.
“I find your thoughts and ideas fascinatingly unique, and it makes me wonder why in the world, you’re wasting your time and money with college.” He then commented as he set my paper down. He leaned back in his chair as it groaned, giving me that notorious perfunctory ‘professor gaze’ with his head tilted to the side, and his index finger poised under his chin.
I did a quick survey out of my periphery around the entire office actually, in case there were shadows still lingering in a corner or something.
I then looked at him quizzically for a moment, a bit taken aback by his accurate assessment of how I was truly feeling about being in any college period in contrast to the efforts and grades I actually made in his class.
Did my paper suck that badly or was he giving me a compliment?
“I don’t know what you mean. I thought I did well on my paper. I covered all the questions you posted…” I began to explain.
“No, your paper was fine. I gave you an A minus for a few sentence fragments. You in fact write quite well.” He waved and cut me off as he leaned forward and pulled a red pen from his pen holder. He opened the clear plastic report cover again; quickly scribbling an A with an abrupt slash next to it at the very top of the page and then slid my paper back over to me.
I was speechless as I glimpsed it and then reached to take it, not really caring about the notes he had written in the margins.
“Oh, thanks.” I said unsurely as I looked at him again.
He leaned forward and clasped his hands together, “You seem like a very intelligent young woman without a doubt, it’s reflected in your work, but I have to ask… is everything alright with you?” he then asked.
Again, I was taken off guard.
“Excuse me?” I furrowed my brows in question.
He leaned back in his chair again.
“You look a bit…overextended and lately you haven’t shown much interest or participation in active discussions. That counts as thirty percent of your overall grade, it was clear in the syllabus.” He then said.
I paused for a moment.
“There’s not much to add once several others have already covered what I would have said if that’s what you mean.” I answered.
“That’s not what I meant. For the past few weeks, it seems as if my lecturing has been keeping you awake. Normally, I wouldn’t even care whether you manage to take advantage and take notes or catch up on your beauty sleep during my class; it’s your own responsibility. After all, it’s your money and time wasted, not mine.” He began with a chastising flat grin.
“Okay, I get that. So, am I passing?” I then asked nonchalantly, quelling the irritation that I’m sure he could detect in my tone.
This time he seemed affronted, and he instantly frowned as he leaned forward, elbows folded on the desk.
At first, I figured that he was offended at my response, taking it as me being a smart-ass, and I admit that yes, I was being one. He had already taken his pot shot at making a fool of me in front of an audience, and I wasn’t about to let him do it again even if we were alone.
Suddenly, I instantly tensed seeing a flicker of shadow pass in the whites of his eyes and then…there was no light in either of them anymore. They looked flat, like two light brown discs devoid of any kind of reflection. It was then that my skin began to crawl with the feeling of a thousand ant legs, my insides clenched with dread, my pulse quickening. He slowly grinned, “Passing yes…surviving, well that leaves much to question…” he hissed in a low whisper. His eerie eyes were intensely boring into mine as if trying to read my thoughts.
Though Professor Phillips was as charming as a three bean salad, he had never spoken disrespectfully to me like this before, and I knew why now.
“Surviving college?” I asked slowly in a normal tone, careful not to show any kind of nervous reaction or fear to what I was seeing and hearing. Professor Phillips may be oblivious to the shadow that had taken up residence with and was now using him as a mouthpiece, but I wasn’t.
He chuckled, “College?” He bellowed with a short quipped laugh, “Not even close! We both know this is all irrelevant. There’s no need for you or anyone else for that matter, to be here at all.” He then rasped with glee.
Now this was getting creepy and serious I thought as I braced myself, feet planted firmly and backpack ready to hitch back up onto my shoulder as I scooted forward in the chair, about to stand.
“No you’re right actually…” I began as I slung my backpack over my sho
ulder and stood up with my paper in hand, “But I made a promise to someone special, and I don’t plan on giving up regardless, even if it is all for nothing.” I finished as I turned to leave.
I heard the wheels of his chair roll backwards quickly, and it made me jump in surprise as I spun around to face him. I was stunned to see him leaning over the desk on his hands, palms flat as he glared at me angrily. “We agree, but college isn’t the kind of survival we meant, it’s nothing compared to what comes. He wants you alive, and we won’t stop until he has you…Starling.” He said in the voice no longer his own. It was an ominous and malevolent tone. He sing-songed the pronunciation of my name in a teasing and mocking way almost the same way that dark angel in my dream had, and it made the tiny fine hairs on my arms stand on end because I had heard it before.
This was really scaring me now, and I swallowed hard, wincing because my mouth and throat had gone nearly bone dry, but I refused to show fear on my face. Not only was it the sound of his voice and what he said, but that he had even called me by my full name too. He wants me alive? Who was ‘He’? The dark angel?
Fear had me backing up to the door briskly while keeping my eyes on him. I reached a hand out behind me to feel for the door knob. “No point in running, you will never be able to escape or hide from us. It will benefit you to come willingly for he has no patience nor does he know any mercy!” He hissed with an evil grin, showing all of his teeth like some rabid Jack-o-lantern. This couldn’t be real. That’s what my brain kept assuring me over and over, but I knew it was. I felt the slick cool metal of the doorknob hit my palm as I closed my fingers around it tightly and turned, but it didn’t move. It was apparently locked, but I hadn’t locked it…had I?
I turned it harder, keeping my eyes on him while trying to maintain my calm as he continued to glare at me. A flicker of shadow passed behind both of his eyes again. It was still in him. The air in the office suddenly became heavy and oppressive with an invisible energy that weighed me down, and seemed to be literally draining energy from me. I felt hot, dizzy and nauseous as if I’d throw up at any moment. I thought of my parents, my grandmother and the disaster that took place back in Louisiana.
I had witnessed in helpless horror, all the masses of shadows provoking, teasing and overtaking so many so easily yet they had been oddly unable to get remotely close to my grandmother and I. Alligators swarmed around our nearly sunken home and perched nearby for hours; someone had tried to shoot at us for God knew whatever reason— only to be attacked by one of those alligators, and rocks were thrown but nothing had ever hit us directly…none of it had worked then, and I’d be damned if I let any of those tactics work now.
I squared my shoulders, sucked in a breath and stood straighter, chunking my backpack and paper. I marched right back over and slammed my own hands, palms down on the top of his desk. He stayed his position firm as I leaned forward and looked up at him, directly into his lightless eyes with resolution and anger...looking for that shadow.
Just then, the expression on his face changed. He looked surprised though the malevolence still remained swirling and coiling within him.
“I’ve been waiting for the last fifteen years for you guys to do something, and if you could you would have by now. I’m not afraid of you so if you know I’m going to die or you guys are going to be the ones to do it—, then bring it on because I’m not going anywhere with you, got it?” I stated firmly. I didn’t blink or waver as we stared each other down.
Professor Phillips snarled and in the next instance, his eyes rolled back so far in his head that only the whites shown. I jumped backwards and took a few steps towards the door, watching him. His large body trembled and he forcefully threw himself back into his chair. It slid backwards and hit the wall behind him with a hard thunk that rattled the framed degrees and certificates that had been hanging, and then he was still.
He looked as if he were sound asleep. I watched in both awe and guarded fascination as the haze of dark shadow poured out from his nostril, forming a cloud of churning shapes that slid up the wall above him and then slithered into the corner where the wall met ceiling. I waited to see what it would do as it seemed to sit, watch and wait for me to move or say something else.
“Nice try.” I said giving it a stern look of indignation as I reached down to pick up my back pack and my paper, still trembling on the inside at the unexpectedly frightening scenario. Professor Phillips’ chest was rising and falling in a steady rhythm, but since he looked like he could be dead, I figured that I should at least check on him to make sure.
Keeping my eyes on the shadow mass that still hovered I moved around his desk and gently grasped his shoulder, giving him a slight shake.
“Professor Phillips?” I asked cautiously.
His head lolled, and he groaned.
“Professor Phillips, are you okay? Do you want me to get the nurse?” I asked more loudly into his ear.
He remained unresponsive with eyes closed, but he was breathing steadily.
I’d get the nurse anyway. I headed back to the door.
The next instant was a blur, and it happened so incredibly fast, that I barely had time to turn around when an enraged, low inhuman sounding growl took me off guard and made my skin crawl. I don’t know how I managed to move that quickly. Gasping, I partially dove and half fell backwards against the wall beside the door as something solid came flying at me with such intense speed that it embedded itself in the wall just where my head had been with a sharp thud.
It took me a moment to regain my thoughts and senses as to what just happened as my eyes immediately flicked to Professor Phillips, who was standing again. His rage was reddening his normally pale face, and his whole body heaved with anger as he scowled and stared me down.
I shivered, swallowing and then biting my lip as I quickly scrambled back up to my feet, adrenaline pumping and heart hammering.
“That was simply a warning…I could kill you easily if I wanted…” The dark, malevolent entity half hissed; half growled through Professor Phillips clenched, coffee stained teeth.
I did the only thing I could think to do that I believed would have any kind of remote effect as a defense.
I began to recite an old prayer my Grandmother used to say when we were sitting atop our roof in the hot, mosquito infested rain that third night after the hurricane.
“There is only one true God, and he is almighty. Led by faith I am in your hands; Give me the strength and the will to fight against the darkness as I walk…” I began to whisper and with each word Professor Phillips seemed to get angrier. His body jerked in awkward spasms like some sort of a crazed marionette. It was almost as if he were trying to fight against whatever took possession of him just then too.
I continued and spoke even louder, “You are the only God of this world, use me to fend off the darkness and the dark ones during the final hours of this earth…” I said as I rose to my full height in defiance to the heavy, pressing energy overtaking the office and stared the thing in Professor Phillips down.
Instantly, I felt a peculiar and different energy begin to rise all around me. The air grew warmer, feeling charged with static and laced with the distinct scent of ozone electricity. It was like the sensation that hits you in the face when you first open the dryer without having used fabric softener right after the dry cycle.
I could sense it was something else supernatural in the room with us now but of what source I didn’t know. I couldn’t tell if it were evil or not either. Though I couldn’t see it, it seemed to have a dramatic...opposing effect on the current draining energy that overtook the air in here. The dizzying feeling I’d been having also begun to subside slowly but gradually. The shadow screeched, this time flying out of Professor Phillips like a gunshot and directly out of the window to the right behind his desk and then disappearing altogether.
Had God answered my prayer?
Slowly, the room regained its normal pressure, and both the biliousness and fatiguing feeling cea
sed miraculously. Professor Phillips collapsed again into his chair with a coughing fit.
I watched and waited for a moment, holding my breath for a beat before slowly moving back over to him.
The cold pin pricks along my skin had turned into chilled beads of sweat, and I felt icky and damp all over beneath my red IU sweatshirt. The now cool, wet, camisole tank top I wore underneath practically melded uncomfortably to me.
“Professor, are you okay?” I asked as I studied him.
He finally cleared his throat, sweat beading over his wide forehead and upper lip as he looked up at me with a confused expression. His eyes were bloodshot and glazed over as he wrinkled his brow and then looked around his office as if he couldn’t remember where he was much less how he had gotten here himself.
I looked around too for good measure, still sensing something in the room and though really powerful, I don’t think it was a negative presence anymore.
Was it an angel standing guard? The one who intervened just now? I wondered and then assumed so.
“I’m…fine… I think. What…” he breathlessly began and then trailed off, rubbing a hand over his face and forehead.
“I’m gonna get the nurse for you.” I told him as I turned to grab my things and then stopped short as my mouth fell open. I caught sight of what the object that had been aiming for my head had been. Something metal was jutting from the wall— as a reminder that what happened really did just take place.
It was a metal ruler.
I was stunned at the tremendous amount of force it took to embed it eight inches into the wall. That would have really hurt if it didn’t kill me instantly but then again, that or scaring me had been the sole purpose. It worked… I swallowed hard, unable to believe what just happened and still shaking inside.
