I didn’t know he was her son until months after we met, and we were already seeing each other when he finally told me. He also told me how much he hated her, which proved to only bond us further – mutual hatred will do that to you. Then he started giving me ways to push her buttons, and I used them to my full advantage.
Katherine was furious when she found out Jason and I were together, and things only got worse from there. But I didn’t care. I was so heavy into partying at that point that all I cared about was having fun. My career was tanking, I was a media spectacle, I’d been arrested a few times, and I was about to crash and burn. I think Katherine must have realized how far gone I was and that even she couldn’t spin what I was doing into something positive. That was when she’d excused herself from my service.
I was fine with it. I was planning to quit at the end of my contract, and I didn’t really want a publicist anyway. I’d lost the ability to care about most things related to my career. I’d already made a ton of money, so I could have endless fun, my family was gone, I had no real friends except Jason, and I had no ambition. Getting high, partying, and pushing the limits on what illegal things I could get away with were my motivators back then. I considered Katherine quitting to be a blessing in disguise.
Then everything went to shit in a short amount of time. After Jason died, and I lost complete control of my life, I knew it was over. That was when I’d gone to rehab. I knew if I didn’t, I was going to lose more than I’d already lost, and just the thought of that was unfathomable. I’d already sunk lower than I’d ever thought possible, and I knew that if there was anything left of my pathetic life to salvage, I needed to at least try to get it back.
Making that decision was the hardest thing I’d ever done, but it was also the best. I’d been so lost and alone. Losing Jason had devastated me, it had eaten away at me, and it had almost destroyed me.
That was why I knew we had to find Phillip. The fact that he was alone terrified me. I had no doubt he was on a precipice, and with the pain and anger and confusion that were probably flooding his every thought, there was a good chance he could fall and no one would be there to catch him.
I wanted to catch him. I wanted to be there for him. I wanted to make sure he knew that for as much as losing Leah felt like the end of the world, it wasn’t, and he would get through it. He would always hurt, and he’d probably always feel like there was a void in his life, but he’d survive – if he wanted to – just like I had.
I looked up to see Van watching me and met his gaze. He gave me a look that told me he was thinking the same things. It didn’t comfort me to know that. It only made my heart ache worse and my worry increase. My fears weren’t irrational. They were completely logical.
A few seconds later my phone rang, and I felt a flutter in my stomach when I saw that it was Greg. I’d just talked to him fifteen minutes earlier, and he’d been calling on the hour. I knew he had to have news.
“Hello?” I said quickly as all eyes in the room shifted to me. We were all waiting for word of any kind.
“His phone came back on,” Greg said quickly, forgoing a greeting.
“Did you talk to him?” I asked quickly, feeling emotion well up in my chest at the thought that Phillip might be okay.
“No, he wouldn’t answer.”
“I’ll try him,” I said quickly.
“Don’t bother,” Greg said, sounding defeated. “It’s off again.”
“Oh,” I said as tears pricked the backs of my eyes, my frustration getting the best of me.
“But I know where he is,” Greg told me.
“You do?” I asked, sitting up straighter as hope enveloped me. “Where?”
“He’s at his dad’s condo – or at least he was five minutes ago.”
“His dad’s condo?” I questioned. “But you said you went there. You said he wasn’t there, that no one was home.”
Kelsey had said it was a long shot, but Phillip’s dad had a condo on South Beach that he now used when he came to Miami on business. He’d had it for years, and she said they used to party there sometimes when they were in high school. It was one of the places she told Greg to look for Phillip, but the condo had been empty when he and Chris, Cam’s bodyguard, had gone two hours earlier. They said it didn’t look like anyone had been there in months.
“Yeah well, that’s where the GPS on his phone said he was, so that’s what I’m going off of,” Greg said. “I’m going to head there now. I’m about thirty minutes away, but I want to stop him before he goes anywhere else and we lose him again.”
“I’ll go,” I offered, knowing that thirty minutes away could turn into longer with traffic. It was too long to wait, and Greg was right. Phillip could leave at any minute, and we could lose him again.
“You’ll go where?” Van asked, coming to stand in front of me. “Where is he? Is he okay?”
I waved him off and plugged my ear with my finger in time to hear Greg ask, “Would you? It’s just a few blocks from the hotel.”
“I’m on my way,” I told him, standing up. There was no question in my mind that I’d go.
“Where are you going?” Dixon asked me.
I sighed. “Greg, I’ll call you when I’m in the car,” I told him, realizing I was going to have to answer the questions of everyone who was looking at me in anticipation before I’d be able to leave the room.
“I’ll call a car for you,” Greg told me. “It’ll be downstairs in the garage in five minutes.”
“I’ll be there,” I told him as I hung up, and then I told everyone what Greg had told me as quickly as I could.
“I’m going too,” Van insisted.
“Me too,” Cam and Dillon said in unison.
I sighed, knowing there probably wasn’t any use in arguing. I didn’t think it was a good idea to bombard Phillip, but I’d deal with that when I had to. It wasn’t like I was going to be able to prevent the guys from following me, and it was unlikely that I’d be allowed to go alone, given what was going on with the media. Arguing was going to be a waste of time that was too precious to squander.
“Anyone else want to come?” I asked, looking around the room.
Damon looked like he wanted to say yes, but I really hoped he wouldn’t. I knew Phillip wouldn’t want him there.
“You’re not coming,” Van told him before he could get the words out, proving how well he knew his best friend.
“Well, I’m not letting you four go out unsupervised,” Damon said tersely.
“Fine, then figure something else out,” Van told him sharply.
Damon narrowed his eyes at Van, and I could tell there were too many unsaid things between them. I was glad they were letting them go for the sake of the situation.
“I’ll ask the hotel to send two of their security guys down to the garage,” Damon said coolly.
“Works for me,” Van told him.
“Okay, great,” I said, already feeling the adrenaline bubbling in my veins. “Glad that’s settled, because we’re wasting time. We have no idea if Phillip’s going to stay where he is for any length of time. We need to go now.”
I was irritated that we were arguing about security. I could have already been on my way. If we missed Phillip because of this, I was going to have someone’s head.
“Go,” Van told me, and that was all I needed to hear.
We left the suite before Damon could stop us or anyone else could ask any more questions and took the elevator down to the garage. The car was waiting, as promised, as were two of the security guards employed by the hotel. I had a feeling they weren’t exactly trained for the kind of security Westside might need, and I hoped we wouldn’t end up needing their service. Things might go to hell quickly if we did.
The ride to Phillip’s dad’s condo was ominously quiet, and I had a feeling we were all thinking the same thing. Talking about it wasn’t going to do any good.
“I think I should go up alone,” I finally said when we were half a block away.
/> I knew the two security guards would do what I asked, but I had a feeling I’d get an argument from the guys. I didn’t want to waste time debating with them when we got to the building and all tried to file out of the car at the same time.
“No way,” Van insisted.
“Yeah, you shouldn’t go alone,” Cam told me.
“Why not?” I questioned. “It’s not like Phillip’s dangerous. He’s not going to pull a gun on me.”
“Yeah, but you barely know him,” Van told me. “I know you’re supposed to be his shrink or whatever, but just because he’s told you a few of his secrets and you’re sleeping with him, it doesn’t mean you know him. I’m going. He needs his friends.”
I didn’t like the way he emphasized the word ‘friends’, like I didn’t fit into that category, so I fixed a glare on him as I said, “For the record, I know him a lot better than you think. I am his friend, and this morning at the hospital, Kelsey asked me to find him, not you. He could be high out of his mind up there. He could be in a completely reckless state of mind, and given your history with similar situations, I’m not sure you’re the best person to handle something like that.”
I knew it was cold to bring up Phillip’s overdose and how Van had panicked when he’d realized what was happening to his friend. He hadn’t known what to do, so he hadn’t done anything. Had Cam not gotten there in time, Phillip probably would have died. But I was desperate, and I needed my point to hit home, so I went there.
“Fuck you,” Van snapped at me, probably hating that I knew about that night. “Just because you’re a junkie too doesn’t give you the authority on what to do if he’s high.”
“Actually, it probably does,” Cam interjected, earning a glare from Van.
“Van,” I said, trying to remain calm as we pulled up in front of the building Phillip’s dad’s condo was in. Time was ticking. “Please. I know him a lot better than you think, and if he’s in a bad place, I can talk him down. I’ve done it before. I don’t want to shut you out, and I know you’re his best friend, but please let me go alone. Please.”
Van didn’t look convinced.
“Van, please. All I care about is helping him. I’m terrified about where his head’s at, and I just want to help him.”
Van still didn’t look convinced as Cam said, “You love him.”
“Yeah, I do,” I said as I looked over at him.
“You do?” Van questioned.
I turned back to him. “Yes, I do. It’s probably not smart given the state of things and the fact that Phillip doesn’t do love, but it’s how I feel. I can’t help it, but because of that I’d do anything for him.”
Apparently that was all it took to convince Van because he said, “Fine. But if you can’t handle him alone, or if he doesn’t want you there, you need to call me.”
I nodded, hoping like hell that wouldn’t be the case. “I will. Just give me time to talk to him. Don’t go barging up there. If I need you, I’ll call you.”
“He could be fine,” Dillon interjected. “He might have just needed some time alone.”
“Let’s hope that’s the case,” I said as I opened the door, even though I didn’t believe that for a second. I honestly didn’t think any of the other guys did either.
As I got out of the car, I pushed the thought aside and made myself focus on the task at hand. It was a nice building, so they would no doubt have security. I probably wouldn’t be able to just waltz in like I owned the place, so I had to figure out how I could convince the guy at the front desk to let me in. Maybe he would know who I was and I could bribe him with an autograph.
Or maybe I could try a different tactic, I thought, as I walked up to the front door, and a resident walked up at the same time. He was a few years older than me, and when he saw me, he looked up and smiled in a way that told me he wasn’t just being polite.
“Hi,” he said in a flirty way as he held the door open for me.
I knew I had a golden opportunity as I watched his gaze rake down my body and back up, so I flashed him a wide smile. “Hi yourself.”
He gave me a questioning look like he recognized me, and if he did, I might be screwed. I wasn’t wearing any make-up, but I knew my face was still recognizable. Even if he didn’t know who I was from my current rise to fame, he could easily remember me from my fall from glory. As much as I hoped my new success would overshadow my past, I knew it never would, and the last thing I wanted was him to be inclined to start asking about it. I didn’t have that kind of time or patience.
“You’re not Sabrina Tyler, are you?” he asked, and my heart sank.
Luckily, though, I’d taken enough acting classes growing up that I could pull a few skills out at a moment’s notice. I knew that was what I was going to have to do to throw him off my trail. The less people who knew what I was doing and where I was going, the better off I’d be.
I laughed. “No, I’m not. I actually get that all the time, but I’m definitely not her.”
The guy smiled in what looked like relief, and a part of me wanted to wipe it off his face – especially when he said, “Good, because although she’s hot, she seems a little crazy.”
Instead I bit my tongue and laughed, “Yeah, well, you don’t have to worry about that with me.”
“Good to know,” he said as we stepped inside the building. “So do you live here?”
“I do,” I told him, lying through my teeth. “I just moved in.”
“Well, isn’t that nice to know,” he said in a suggestive sort of way.
I smiled. “I like it so far,” I said as we walked by the front desk.
The guy nodded to the security guard who greeted him in return, and I was able to walk right by without being stopped. As I’d hoped, the security guard assumed we were together. Now I just had to ditch this guy as fast as I could.
“What floor are you on?” he asked me as we stepped into the elevator together.
I pressed the button for the twenty-first floor and smiled at him.
“Touché,” he said when he realized I was headed to the penthouse.
I shrugged and stared straight ahead as he pressed the button for the fifth floor. As the elevator started to quickly rise, I found myself thankful that I’d be losing him soon enough.
“Could I get your number? Maybe we could grab a drink sometime,” he said, most likely realizing the same thing.
“I’m sorry, but I don’t think my boyfriend would like that very much,” I said, right as the elevator opened on the fifth floor.
“Oh, your boyfriend?”
“Sorry,” I said again, urging him to get a move on. “See you around.”
“Yeah, I’ll see you,” he said as the doors closed, erasing him from my view.
I let out a breath as the elevator started to rise again. This was it, and I could only hope I was going to get there in time. I sent a silent prayer up to any deity who might be listening that Phillip was okay. I figured after all I’d been through I deserved at least a little goodness to fall my way.
There were two condos on the top floor, and according to Greg, 2102 belonged to Phillip’s father. When I got to the door, I figured I could knock, but then I worried that Phillip might not open the door. If he was still there, surprising him might be best. Or it could be a bad move. Either way, if the door was open, I was about to find out.
I took a deep breath, reached out and tried the knob, letting the air in my lungs rush out as it turned in my hand. Either Phillip was there, or he’d left and forgot to lock the door. I was hoping for the former, but as I walked into the condo, I didn’t see any signs that anyone was there. Everything seemed quiet and undisturbed.
I was glad my sneakers made little to no sound on the tile floor as I walked from room to room, feeling more and more defeated with every glance into more emptiness. The place was huge, but the rooms were big, so I was able to make my way through the condo quickly. But I was also rapidly realizing that Phillip wasn’t there. I sighed as I walked
over to the last room I needed to check. It was in the far corner, the door was closed, and with my luck, it was probably a closet. But I was going to look there anyway.
With a pounding heart, I reached out and twisted the knob, opening the door. I was surprised to see that it was actually an office, and at first glance, I thought the room was empty. No one was sitting at the desk, and dim light from the setting sun was filtering in through the large picture windows on two walls, casting an odd mix of light and shadows into the corners.
I stepped into the room, and when I turned, my heart stuttered, and a rush of breath left me. There was a dark leather couch on the same wall as the door, and hunched over in the corner of it was Phillip. The dark hoodie he’d had on the night before was pulled up over his head, and the parts of his face I could see were mostly shadowed. His eyes were surrounded by dark circles, giving him a haunted look.
“Phillip,” I said softly, because he hadn’t looked up. His gaze was fixed on the coffee table in front of him, and even though I knew he’d heard me, he didn’t react. “Phillip?”
“What are you doing here?” he asked with practically no emotion in his voice, his gaze never leaving the coffee table.
“I was so worried about you,” I told him, afraid to move and afraid to look away.
The disconnected look in his eyes scared me. It was like he’d crawled into himself, and I was only catching glimpses of the guy I knew. He looked like a ghost.
“You should go,” he said, dismissing me.
“No,” I said softly, but my voice was firm enough that he had to know I was serious.
“I don’t want you here. I want to be alone.”
“No, you don’t,” I told him. “Phillip, you need your friends right now.”
“You’re not my friend,” he said, piercing me right in the heart with words I hoped he didn’t mean. He couldn’t mean them.
“I am your friend,” I told him firmly. “And I’m not leaving.”
He finally looked up and met my gaze, and the emptiness I saw there unsettled my stomach.
“You should go,” he said flatly. “You’re not going to want to see this.”
Westside Series Box Set Page 104
