Gabe, however, eased his way up her body and kissed her gently. “I could get lost in your body for years, and it still wouldn’t be long enough to learn all I want to know about it.” He searched her face, his hand still sliding over her hip. “For a thousand years, all I cared about was the Order. Everything was a means to that end. I still have those goals, but right now, touching you is simply about this moment. I’ve never been in the moment before. Not like this. Not simply because it felt so damn good.”
She raised her chin, trying to find the willpower not to fall into his arms and just surrender to his strength, shocked by how much she wanted to simply stay there with him, and never move. “We don’t have time for this,” she said reluctantly, forcing herself to say words she didn’t want to say. “People are counting on us.”
“I know.” He kissed her again, harder this time, deeper, a kiss of possession and ownership, but also a kiss of tenderness and intimacy, a personal kiss, one that was about the two of them, and no one else.
She gasped, shifting as desire began to pulse through her. Not just lust. Something deeper. Something more powerful. Something that seemed to sear her veins, burning through her. “What are you doing?”
“We’re about to face a significant opponent.” His hand slipped from her hip to her belly. He spread his fingers across the flat of her stomach, and then moved his hand lower, cupping her body where it curved, his fingers lightly resting on the folds of her body, but not invading them. “We need you at full strength.” He slipped his fingers inside her, and she gasped, twisting restlessly as sensations flooded her. Heat, passion, need, and something more, something that seemed to pry apart the shields she kept wrapped around her.
She clasped his wrist, trying to still his hand. “It’s too much,” she gasped. “I can’t stay in control—”
“Good.” He caught her mouth and kissed her more deeply, shattered the walls she’d lived behind for so long, until there was nothing left protecting her. Her heart, her soul, her very being were exposed and raw, surrendered to Gabe, entrusted to him. She tried to hold on, she tried to keep herself distant, but with each kiss, with each movement of his fingers deep inside her, with each whisper of her name on his lips, she fell harder under his spell, until she was consumed by the sheer power of his presence, his kiss, his power.
“That’s my girl,” he whispered, as he slid his knee between hers.
She locked her knees behind his back, gasping as he slid inside her, an invasion that was perfect and right…an invasion that seemed to tear apart the walls she held so dear, catapulting her into a free-fall of sensation, need, desire, and emotion. She felt the tears warm on her cheeks, but she had no time to think about them, swept away on the tide of his lovemaking.
He drove deep, again and again, but he never broke the kiss, a sensual, intimate connection that kept her grounded in him, even as sensations were exploding through her body. She wrapped her hands around his neck, holding on desperately to him, afraid to let go, afraid—
“Let yourself go, sweetheart. Just go with it.” He unclasped her hands from behind his neck and pinned them above her head, giving her nothing to hold onto, nothing to ground herself in, nothing to anchor her—
You don’t need an anchor. Your power is so much more than that. Feel how much you are, Maria. Gabe’s voice filled her, rushing through her like a warm, turbulent wind, sweeping aside the noise, the grief, the years of hardness, until there was nothing but him, nothing but her, nothing but the sensation of freedom, of flying, of power, of more.
She took a deep breath, and suddenly, the tension left her body. The weight of hundreds of years vanished, and she felt lighter, brighter, joyous. Laughter bubbled up through her, and she tilted her head back, surrendering to the emotions pouring through her.
So beautiful. Gabe’s awed voice whispered through her mind, and then he drove deep, a final thrust that tore her from the final, tattered tethers holding her back. She screamed as the orgasm tore through her, throwing her head back as he took her over the precipice of sensation, ecstasy, and illumination.
Maria. Her name tore from his very soul as he bucked against her, the orgasm gripping him as ruthlessly as it had her. Together, they flew, unfettered, free, and exultant, as the orgasm catapulted them from their foundations and sent them spiraling into the unfamiliar, exhilarating rush of the world they’d never experienced.
Chapter 25
It felt like an eternity before Gabe could think again, before he could summon the energy to move. He was still buried deep inside Maria, his cock still hard for her, despite the fact he’d poured everything he had into her. He’d made love to Maria to empower her, but it had rocked his foundations in a major way.
And he was okay with it.
More than okay.
He always felt strong and powerful. He always knew he could handle anything. But now? He could hear more clearly. His muscles pulsed with energy they’d never had before. He could discern every scent down to its microscopic nuance. He was more than he’d ever been, and it was because of Maria.
“Maria?” He pressed a kiss to her hair, breathing in the faint scent of roses clinging to the strands. How did she smell of roses, when she’d spent her life in the demon world?
“Mmm…” She was nestled against him, tucked in his arms, her face pressed against the curve of his throat. It was intimate perfection, and he tightened his arm around her.
“Even though I won’t let you kill for me, I would wipe the earth clean of your enemies to keep you safe.” Shit. That wasn’t what he’d meant to say. Hell, he didn’t even know what he’d meant to say, but that wasn’t it. “How are you feeling?” Yeah, that was better.
Maria didn’t answer for a long moment.
He frowned, tension suddenly settling in his muscles. He moved fast, faster than he’d intended, rolling on top of her so he could see her face. “You okay?”
She looked up at him, her beautiful blue eyes searching his face. “I’ve spent my life having sex to power myself, but I’ve never felt like I do now. I feel energy vibrating through me so intensely, I feel like I could split a boulder in half just by sneezing on it. What happened? Why was it different?”
He grinned, inordinately pleased by her question. He wanted sex with him to be different. He needed it to be different. “I used our sheva bond to connect us. We merged when we made love. Since we both have demon heritage, we were able to feed off each other’s strengths. We took what we needed from each other, and it made us both stronger.”
Her eyes widened. “I made you stronger?”
“Yeah.”
“But how? I mean, I understand that sex makes me stronger, but why did it help you?”
He couldn’t stop himself from smoothing a lock of hair off her face. “I’m not sure. I was just trying to strengthen you, but it worked for me, too.” He grinned. “Maybe my demon ancestry is lust demon, as well.”
Heat flushed her cheeks. “I hate being a lust demon,” she said quietly. “I hate having to feed off men for sex.”
His amusement faded at the idea of her having sex with anyone else, but he didn’t comment. She didn’t need shit from him about sleeping with other men right now. She needed to cut herself a break. Instead, he simply said, “I’ve killed rogue Calydons who were my friends. I’ve killed women. I’ve watched good men die. I stood over them, knowing that I caused their deaths, and I took their pain into my heart. I had to do it, to save the innocents they were going to hurt, but it fucking sucks.”
She watched him, listening. “It does,” she agreed. “I’m sorry you had to do that.”
He shrugged. “It’s no different from what you’ve done. We’re the same. I killed friends. You did what it took to be able to save the innocents who were counting on you. You’re a warrior, Maria. You’ve spent your life sacrificing yourself to protect the innocents. You’ve done whatever it took to make that happen. That’s admirable as hell. You should be proud of what you’ve done.”
“Admirable?” He snorted. “Fuck that. You almost died saving Sophie, Vlad, and me today. You’d lay down your life for those you protect. You’re the hero, sweetheart.”
Tears filled her eyes, and she looked away. “I’m not that special.”
“You are.” He slipped his hand into her hair, palming the back of her head gently, forcing her to look at him. “There are very few warriors with true honor in this world,” he said, opening his mind to hers, wanting her to feel the truth of his words. “You’re one. You are unique and incredible.”
Heat flared in her cheeks, but a small smile played at the corner of her mouth, and he knew she’d heard the truth, that he meant every word. “You’re trying to butter me up for something, aren’t you?” she said, raising one eyebrow at him. “Spill it, Gabe.”
He grinned, and let her change the subject. He knew she’d heard what he’d said, even if she wasn’t ready to own it. “I’m not holding any secrets, babe. I need to find Dante and bring him out of the demon world. That’s all I need from you.”
She nodded, her smile fading as the reality of their situation descended upon them again. “And I need your help with the women.”
He frowned at her statement, wanting to understand what it was that drove her, what she was defending. He wasn’t deviating from his mission to get Dante, but if these women were in need of protection, he wanted to know about it. “Tell me about the women. What’s your role with them?”
She surveyed him for a long moment. “It’s surreal to be having this discussion with you. You actually care about what’s important to me, don’t you?”
“Of course.”
“Of course,” she echoed softly. “As if the entire world was like you.” She traced her fingers over his whiskers, her touch soft and intimate. “A man of such honor,” she said softly. “I’ve never met anyone like you before.”
He kissed the tips of her fingers. “Nothing special about me, babe. Just doing my job, which includes the Order, and you. Two jobs now. Tell me about the women.”
She watched him kissing her fingers, her features soft. “The demons steal women from the earth realm, and bring them here to be their lovers. Unfortunately, demon semen contains the same toxin that is in their claws, so, over time, they poison their lovers.”
His lips stilled on her fingers as an icy cold fury settled inside him. “Do they rape the women?”
“No, no.” She shook her head quickly. “The women bond with them. They don’t want to leave them.” She sighed, the weight heavy in her eyes. “I cleanse the poison from the women. I can keep them alive for a while, but they keep going back until eventually, even I can’t save them.” She looked at Gabe, sadness etched on her face. “They stay with the demons until they die.”
He swore, his grip tightening on her hand. What the fuck? No sex was worth death. “So, it’s some kind of psychic control they have over the women?”
“No.” Maria shook her head. “I asked my brother about it. He’s a lust demon. He said he doesn’t do anything. He just craves them, and they crave him.” She sighed. “My brother, Damon, is a good guy. He has a good heart. I can see it in his eyes that it tears him apart each time one of his women die, but he can’t stop it. Not all demons care, but he does. I…I don’t know what it is. Neither does he.” She sighed. “Maybe they stay just because demon sex is amazing?” She looked at him, heat flushing her cheeks. “You’ve had demon sex. Is it addictive? What would you do for more of it? “
“Demon sex? You know damn well I didn’t succumb to the demon part of it. I’m too tough for that.” He raised his brows. “Sex with you isn’t amazing because you’re a demon. It’s because we’re just that damn good together, and you know it. “
She laughed. “It’s too bad you’re so lacking in self-esteem.”
He grinned. “No warrior can afford anything less than arrogance. Otherwise, you lose the first time your ass is on the line.” His smile faded as he revisited their discussion. He was in warrior mode, and he wanted to know what he was facing. “So you want to get the women out of here?”
“I wish I could.” She sighed. “Most of them don’t want to go. But Sophie must leave.” Her face fell, and Gabe felt a wave of genuine sadness from her. “She doesn’t want to leave me behind, but it’s too dangerous for her to stay. The entire demon kingdom is hunting her.”
Gabe lightly grasped a strand of her hair and tucked it back away from her face, wanting to connect with her, to ground her over the sudden sadness consuming her at the thought of Sophie leaving. “So you want me to kidnap her and take her out.”
Maria bit her lip, but she nodded. “Yes.”
He met her gaze. “And what about you?”
“What about me?”
“She seems to think you won’t be okay without her here. Is she right?”
Maria shrugged evasively, brushing a piece of lint off his bare shoulder. “I’ll be okay—”
“Don’t lie. We don’t have time.”
Maria shifted uncomfortably, all too aware of the ruthless intensity of his question. She bit her lip, not wanting to articulate the depth of pain in her heart, because that would make it too real. “I told you. I’m fine—”
“Maria.” His voice was unrelenting. “I need the truth. I need to know what we’re dealing with.”
She glared at him, chafing under his demands. “Fine. You want to know the truth? The truth is that I’ll be devastated when she leaves, but I’ll do my best to stay alive. If I die, the women have no one to help them. I owe them, and I will see it through until I die.” She bit her lip at the sudden ache in her chest. “A part of my soul will shatter when Sophie leaves,” she said quietly. “She’s my best friend, my only real friend, and without her, life here is going to feel like an abyss of loneliness.”
The words hung out there in the darkness, suspended by the pain in her heart, gaining strength with each moment. Sophie leaving her? How could she do this alone? How—
Gabe sighed, and took her hand, pressing a kiss to her palm. “A heroine who is willing to sacrifice everything for those under her protection.”
The reverence in his voice and the feel of his touch somehow stabilized her, catching her before the anguish of losing Sophie could take root. She managed a smile. “Thanks—”
She stopped suddenly, staring at him, realizing that it wasn’t just Sophie she was going to lose. Gabe was going to leave as well.
Her heart seemed to freeze in her chest, and she coughed, trying to get air. How could she survive life without Sophie or Gabe? He had changed everything for her. He’d redefined what it meant for her to be a lust demon. He’d given her peace, freedom to heal, he’d empowered her, and he’d made her feel cherished and admired as a woman and a warrior. Dear God, how could she possibly go back to frenzied sex with random demons after this?
He narrowed his eyes, searching her face with so much intensity she felt like he was stripping her bare and exposing her soul. “So, you want to stay here for eternity and heal women who get poisoned by their lovers?” he asked.
“Do I want to?” His use of that word made her hesitate. No, she didn’t want to stay here and live this life, especially without Sophie, and without him. “No. What I want to do is go with Sophie…” And with Gabe, not that she would ever admit it, even to herself. “I want to leave the demon world, and live another life, with people who matter to me. I want to breathe fresh air. Feel the sun on my face. Taste fresh fruit. I want to sleep at night without worrying about demons sneaking in, or women dying on my doorstep—”
She stopped suddenly when she saw Gabe staring at her, his eyebrows raised in surprise. Heat flushed her cheeks, and she grimaced, already regretting that she’d said it aloud. She’d heard about the blue skies and warm sun from Sophie and the wome
n, and she’d always dreamed that someday, even for one day, she’d get to see what life was like in the earth realm…but she never articulated those dreams. Ever. They were a fantasy, not a reality. Dreaming of something she could never have made her own life intolerable. She knew that, and yet Gabe had tempted her past her shields.
Hardening her heart, she managed a dismissive shrug. “But I’d never go. If I leave, and there’s even one woman left here, then she has no one to save her, so I’ll stay. It’s what I do.”
He nodded, trailing his finger over her breast. “A warrior to the heart,” he said softly, unmistakable admiration in his voice.
Sudden tears sprung into her eyes, and she slapped his hand away. “I’m not a warrior. I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to keep being strong.” She sat up, pulling away from him. “You’re a warrior because you consciously chose that path. I just…I don’t know. This is just my life, and so many times every day, I wish it wasn’t. I’m not a heroine! I’m not a warrior! I just—I just have to help them. I’m all they have.” She stared at him, tears spilling down her cheeks. “I’m so tired,” she whispered. “Every day it gets more difficult to get up. So much death. So much coldness. So much darkness. It never ends. Ever. There is no ending…except death, either for me, or the women.”
Gabe gently clasped her wrist and gave a quick tug, pulling her against his chest. She closed her eyes and sank into his embrace, burying her face in his chest while he stroked her hair. “Sometimes,” he said, “we’re heroes not by choice. I became an Order of the Blade member because my neighbor, who was a Calydon, went rogue and killed my dad, my mother, and my two sisters.”
Maria went still, shocked by his story. “Oh, Gabe, I’m so sorry—”
“I attacked him, trying to save my sister, and he threw me across the room. I broke my leg when I hit the wall. I couldn’t move as he charged across the room. He grabbed me by my neck, dragged me off the ground, and reared back to slam his axe into my stomach, when Dante showed up, and killed him. My neighbor died just as he shoved his axe into my gut.” Gabe’s voice was soft, not hard, not cold, and he was rubbing his hands through her hair almost restlessly, as if he was using her to distract himself from the emotions of his memories.
Hunt the Darkness (Order of the Blade Book 11) Page 23
