Infamous: (A Bad Boy Romantic Suspense)

by Noir, Mila

  The sound of the waves hitting the boat sides was the only real sound, and we didn’t seem to be moving much. I assumed we were anchored in the middle of Nowhere, Ocean, for a reason.

  I walked up to the upper deck and saw Tina napping by a comically large steering wheel that I suspected was mostly for show. This was clearly a modern yacht that likely had a fancy engine room somewhere. Robert’s assistant was having a siesta on a pile of pillows, a stack of glittering pink candies near one tiny hand. I was glad to see her alive and well.

  It was strange to be on a boat after everything that had just happened. It was so quiet and peaceful, sunny and balmy. It was like being in a dream or on vacation. But then I looked at my wounded arms and things felt a lot more real.

  I didn’t wake Tina; I had a feeling she’d been working overtime with my disappearance. I wasn’t really looking forward to explaining to anyone what had happened because it had been partly my own fault. I’d made it a lot easier for Stoller and crew to nab me, and I wasn’t thrilled with my brief stint as The Stupid Girl in a Story Who Does Exactly What It Is Obvious She Should Not. No one likes that character. They yell at her on screen or throw her book across the room.

  I wanted to be like Elizabeth Bennett, plucky and smart, maybe a little too clever and judgy, but who ends up with a great guy at the end based on the fact that she’s just too awesome even with her (let’s face it, minor) flaws. Instead I was heading towards more of a tragic gothic novel sort of future, and those really only sound romantic when you’re thirteen and don’t know any better. When you’re an adult they seem awful.

  I figured I had a few hours before Dimitri or Robert got up. I wasn’t sure whose boat it was, though with Tina there, it seemed likely it was Robert’s. I hoped wherever Dimitri was he was safe. I had a feeling he could take care of himself, but still. I worried.

  I wandered into the galley and found a fridge that was well stocked, especially with sweets. Given the trauma of the last few days, I was heartily glad that Tina was clearly the one doing the shopping. I grabbed a vat of chocolate ice cream and some whipped cream, dumped them in a bowl, and ate until I felt sick. It was a strangely comforting sort of nausea. A reminder that I was alive and could do things like eat too much ice cream. Which is a lot more fun and less serious than, say, getting cut up or eaten.

  After that I drank water until it felt like I might be able to float away on my own, and headed back to my cabin. I was exhausted again and ready to sleep for several days if anyone would let me.

  I collapsed into my bed and was asleep in no time. I don’t remember any dreams.

  It was warm and smelled like cloves. I burrowed into it, breathing deep, feeling safe and comforted. Hands held me, rubbed my back, and gently caressed my face. I sighed, not wanting to wake up from this dream. I wanted to stay warm and held forever.

  “Emma.” Robert’s voice, deep as the darkest chocolate, flowed over me.

  “Mmph,” I said, burying my face against a broad chest.

  “Emma, wake up, love,” he said again. Something about the way British men say “love” just kills me.

  “No, I don’t want to,” I said stubbornly. I kept my eyes shut and breathed in his scent and covered my face with my hands.

  They were gently pried away and I felt lips pressed to my forehead, cheeks, lips. I couldn’t help but smile. He kissed my eyelids and I opened them, looking into that strongly etched face and those intense blue eyes. They were kind, concerned, and something else. Something I didn’t really want to think about.

  He kissed my mouth and ran his fingertips over my eyebrows, down to my cheekbones. I was in his arms, looking up, incredibly happy to see him but more than a little afraid of what he might say. That I was more trouble than I was worth, probably.

  “Oh, Emma. Your poor arms,” he said, and held me, kissing the top of my head. It wasn’t fatherly, thankfully, but he cradled me gently, almost reverently.

  “I’m okay, Robert,” I said, trying to be reassuring. I was, really. I mean, yes, my arms hurt like hell. But they’d heal. I’d have scars, but that was better than the more permanent issue of being dead.

  “You aren’t. We promised to keep you safe, and that…thing…did you serious harm,” he said. I nodded.

  “Yes, but I left. I made it easy. And I put you, Dimitri, Tina, Solosha in danger. I know it’s not my fault Stoller is a psycho, but I knew better. I just felt trapped. I’m sorry,” I said, looking away.

  “Emma, no,” he almost whispered.

  “You just…you don’t know how hard it’s been. My life is completely upside down. I can’t go anywhere, I can’t talk to the people I care about. Any minute some new thing could swoop in and end my life. Which, let’s face it, hasn’t been stunningly interesting up until now. I don’t want to die before I’ve had a chance to really do…anything,” I finished. I’d finally admitted to it. I’d been trying to snark my way around it, but it all came down to a pretty simple thing: I didn’t want to die having never lived.

  In answer Robert kissed me, full and hard, with a passion I’d never quite experienced with him before. He was careful of my arms, laying me down and covering me with his body, letting his hips thrust into mine, sending a shock of warm pleasure through me. His hands slid up my legs, tickling gently at my thighs, making me smile and squirm a little. He nuzzled my neck, finding the spot I liked behind my ear, biting gently. More shocks and shivers.

  He kissed up my legs, finding a sensitive spot behind my knees I hadn’t been aware of. His hands rested between my legs, gently stroking across my underwear, teasing me deliciously. When he pulled them aside and pressed his mouth to me, I arched, sighing. It felt good to be loved like this.

  Parting me, he whispered that I was beautiful, then claimed me with his lips. I gasped as his tongue found my sensitive bud and swirled. He pulled me close, going slow, circles of flesh making me weak with need.

  I surrendered to it, I let my body flow with pleasure, and Robert brought me high. I came with a cry, back bowed, nerves on fire.

  He entered me slowly, with excruciating care. He bit my neck as he did it, filling me up so fully I wrapped my legs around him to contain the sensation. We rocked together, our bodies slick and warm with passion. I felt myself cresting again, riding a wave of shattering pleasure. It peaked, then peaked again, and I clung to him like a drowning woman. He held me there, coaxed my body back up again and again. Then he finally came with me, flowing too, crying out my name into my hair.

  We lay together after, not speaking. He stroked my hair and kissed my injured arms with reverent, fluttery kisses. I drifted, then fell asleep in the crook of his arm.

  When I woke up this time, there was food by my bed. I ate it ravenously, my stomach an aching pit. I showered, arms stinging, but as I watched away the old blood, I saw that the wounds were already starting to heal. No sign of infection, which was a relief. I wouldn’t have put it past Stoller to make the knife dirty or poison it. But it had been two days now and I wasn’t sick. Small favors.

  It was late afternoon when I emerged, feeling clean and almost “new” in a strange sort of way. I was wearing white again, loose pants and a vaguely transparent top, the kind I never would have worn before. But now I liked the feel of it against my skin and the way it flowed over my breasts, hinting at their shape, which I hadn’t bothered to restrain. It wasn’t like I had an audience to worry about and I’ve never really liked bras all that much. I wanted to be comfortable and no longer cared what anyone thought about it.

  I sat by a railing and looked out at the water. We were moored again, but where, I couldn’t say. I thought we had moved sometime in the night, thought I’d heard engines, but I was too wiped out from lovemaking to register much beyond that. The ocean in this spot looked much like it had before. The whole world seemed to have slipped away. At that moment I didn’t mind that idea at all.

  Lying back, I looked up at the clear blue sky that was just starting to become rosy around the edges as
the sun set. A few birds coasted on high winds but there wasn’t a cloud to be seen. The air moved lazily, not exactly a breeze but not truly still. I remembered flying with Solosha and wished I could have enjoyed it under other circumstances.

  I’m not sure when I dozed off, but I must have, because the next thing I knew I was being awoken by a soft kiss against my lips. I opened my eyes, smiling, expecting to see Robert. Instead, Dimitri was leaning over me, pushing the hair back from my forehead, and touching my cheek. I sat up, surprised, but glad.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked as he sat down beside me. I felt a little embarrassed. I mean, I’d been expecting another man entirely. I didn’t want him to think I wasn’t pleased to see him.

  “We felt it was best if we all stuck together from now on. Leaving you alone was a mistake,” he said. I nodded, knowing what he meant.

  “Look, I’m sorry. Really. It was stupid and thoughtless of me to leave like that. I wasn’t thinking. I told Robert last night, I just felt so trapped. But that’s not an excuse,” I said. He looked at me for a minute, not saying anything.

  “Emma…” He shook his head and looked away. There was a bright moon out, not quite full, and the air was still warm from the day. The waves were calm and the boat rocked gently from side to side. I waited.

  “Emma, what you did…yes, it was a mistake. But it happened because you’ve been treated like a caged animal just for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Robert and I know that. We were just too worried to see it until you left,” he said. I was stunned. I’d been expecting a lecture; Lord knew I deserved it. Instead I was getting understanding and an apology. It was a little too much.

  “Dimitri, no. I’m a grown-up. I should have talked to you both. Instead I just packed up and left, not really considering the consequences. Something awful could have happened to Solosha. Well, more awful. I’d understand if she hated me now, even though she did literally swoop in and save me…” He took my hand and I bit my lip. My cheeks were flushed with embarrassment.

  “She doesn’t hate you, Emma. Solosha knows better than anyone how important freedom is.”

  “She does?” I asked. That was interesting.

  “You should ask her about it sometime. All I can tell you is that out of anyone, she knows what it’s like to be trapped. And for a sylph, a wind sprite, to be forced to stay anywhere? It’s worse than anything. Like being suffocated but kept alive,” he said. I swallowed. I wasn’t sure I wanted to know now.

  “I appreciate the understanding, but still. You and Robert could have been killed. That necromancer…what was he? He looked like he was some kind of Frankenstein patchwork person,” I said, shuddering.

  “You’re not far off. He is made of different people, different dead people. Necromancers attach parts of the deceased to themselves to increase their control over the dead and undead. It’s a brutal, unpleasant process. Most don’t survive it,” he said.

  “Well, ew, is all I can say. I don’t understand, though. Wasn’t he controlling you both? How did you break that spell?” I asked. He smiled and it wasn’t really a pleasant one.

  “We suspected something like him was waiting for us, once we found out it was Stoller who had been contracted to grab you. He has a reputation,” he said, but didn’t elaborate.

  “If his reputation is ‘Gigantic Asshole’ it’s being too kind,” I said sourly. I wouldn’t be forgetting the man who had cut me any time soon. Or how happy he’d looked doing it.

  “I can’t forgive myself for what happened, Emma. I can’t,” Dimitri said, and put his head in his hands. I didn’t understand.

  “It’s not your fault. And I’m okay. A few scars, but life leaves a scar,” I said, smiling. He looked up at me, eyes shining and full of pain.

  “It should never have happened. I promised. I know I can be a flippant ass, but I meant it. I meant to protect you,” he said, taking my hands, looking at my arms with a profound sadness.

  “You can’t control everything. I made my own choice. And Stoller made his. It’s not anyone’s fault he is how he is,” I said. And I realized I believed that. Whatever mistakes I’d made in leaving, I didn’t deserve what had happened. It had been traumatic and horrifying and not my fault. I still felt guilty because people I cared about had been put in danger. But in the end, they’d been endangered not by me, but by horrible things I had no control over. No matter what I had or hadn’t done, in the end, I was the victim. I didn’t like it, but there it was.

  “Let’s go for a swim,” Dimitri said, standing up and holding out a hand. It was an abrupt change of subject, I felt.

  “Uh, now? It’s like…the middle of the night. And anything could be in that water,” I said, eyeing it dubiously.

  “Don’t worry. I’ll be with you,” he said. There was something in the way he said it that sent pleasant chills up my spine. I nodded.

  “Shirts or skins?” I asked, laughing a little self-consciously. In answer, Dimitri stripped. I looked at him in the moonlight and sighed. I seemed to be doing that a lot lately, looking at beautiful men and sighing.

  And he was beautiful. The lines of him, the finely chiseled face, the way the soft, silvery light glanced off of him, making him unearthly and resplendent. It was like looking at a statue, carved to perfection.

  I stripped down to my underwear and started for the ladder. Dimitri swung me into his arms and kissed me soundly in the moonlight, hands buried in my hair. I held on to his neck as he swept me up and carried me to the edge of the boat.

  He then unceremoniously tossed me into the water.

  I came up sputtering, angry and amused at the same time. It was such a juvenile trick. I watched him arc into a perfect dive (of course) and slice into the water beside me. Damn vampires, always doing everything with grace and ease. I pushed my heavy wet hair back and hoped I looked less like it was plastered unflatteringly to my head and more like when models have it carefully styled for a photo shoot. It was dark, though, so it probably didn’t matter that much anyway.

  I swam out a ways but not too far. I was feeling only moderately brave and I didn’t really want to encounter a shark or shrieking eel or something. At this point, anything was possible. I frankly wouldn’t have been surprised if the Loch Ness Monster had suddenly shown up and started singing.

  The water was cool but not entirely cold. I hadn’t been swimming in years, too afraid of bathing suits. And now I was mostly skinny-dipping, just some thin cotton between me and nature. It felt good.

  Dimitri swam out to me with sure, easy strokes. I looked back at the ship, realizing for the first time how big it was. But maybe not big enough for the three of us in this unconventional relationship, plus Tina and Solosha, whenever she showed up. I had a feeling a cruise ship with no one else on it would have felt tiny with the mountain-sized interpersonal relationship and history issues we were dealing with.

  As I watched one of my lovers swim towards me like a merman, I had a disturbing thought: were there actually merpeople? No, scratch that, let’s not go there. Instead, I thought about how I wanted him to kiss me again and maybe try some aquatics that skewed into the territory of naughty.

  Something like that seemed to be on Dimitri’s mind because the look he gave me as he swam near was nothing short of hotly determined. We circled each other for a bit, wet skin sliding across one another, then away. I felt his fingertips graze my breasts, and I let mine sweep across his taut lower belly.

  I began to swim back towards the boat, Dimitri following fast. He caught me just before I reached the ladder and pulled me to him as I laughed, breathless. He kissed me, skin warm and wet, lips firm and sure. His hands rested on my hips, keeping me close. I wrapped myself around him, enjoying the smooth feel of his skin in the water. He tasted pleasantly salty and I put my hands in his wet hair.

  It was easy after that. He touched, I touched, we explored each other in this sea world of sensation. Nothing felt quite real except the way he was touching me. Especially when h
is fingers slipped into my underwear and found me, hot and aching and wanting.

  I held on to him as he let his fingers glide along me, then inside, with a little gasp. I was ready for more. He positioned me over him, then thrust a little way, then fully. I arched, tightening. I let myself lean back, half-free, half-rooted to him as he moved inside me. The water kept me buoyed, and he kept me from floating away. I let my mind wander, feeling the water around me, this man filling me, my body working towards a high and relentless peak.

  I arched out of the water as I came, my nerves singing, my voice crying. Then I watched Dimitri as he rushed towards his own orgasm, face taut, arms holding me, head thrown back. I will never forget his face in that moment, painted with moonlight, silver and dark.

  We climbed back onto the boat, slipping a little and giggling. He wrapped me in a robe and led me back to the cabins, but instead of going to my room, he brought me into his, which was one section down. There were heavy black curtains on the windows, but they’d been pushed back so there was a view of the water from below. Softly glowing lights had been installed so I could look out into the ocean. At the moment it was just a soft, hazy blue-green, no fish or sharks or merpeople to be seen. It was peaceful, soothing, and I found myself growing heavy-lidded and -limbed.

  Dimitri put me in his bed, then spooned me, an arm over my naked belly. I let myself drift, feeling warm and postcoitally satisfied. If I ever wrote a memoir I could now say I’d gone skinny-dipping and had sex in the deep, wide ocean. With a vampire. It would probably be one of the more interesting autobiographies available that absolutely no one would believe.

  The next few days dissolved into a dreamy, hazy mix of sunny days spent sleeping or eating, and nights full of sex with two men. It didn’t feel quite real but I went with it, my body slowly healing under their tender care.

  Maybe a week passed before, one night, I got up to find both Dimitri and Robert in the main sitting area, arguing. They stopped when I walked in.

  “Carry on. It sounds interesting,” I said, folding myself up on a couch. Tina was in a corner with her arms crossed and she rolled her eyes at me and shrugged when I looked over. Clearly whatever was going on had been going on for a while and she wasn’t super thrilled about it.