Romancing the Soul

by Sarah Tranter

  George looked into his sister’s eyes and could see she was telling the truth. Bloody hell, she was telling the truth! He’d assaulted a woman. He couldn’t remember a damned thing, but he had assaulted a woman! He urged himself to stay calm and take several deep breaths in an attempt to slow his frenetic heartbeat. Deep breath. Deep breath.

  When he finally felt able to talk, he asked in an urgent whisper, ‘Did I hurt her?’

  Cassie shook her head, no longer meeting his eyes. ‘But she passed out too.’ Her hushed voice sounded anguished. ‘You weren’t giving her much of an opportunity to breathe with your tongue down her throat and I think—’

  George shot forward and hammered on the glass between themselves and the driver. ‘Fifty quid if you get us there within sixty seconds.’ To Cassie, as he sat back, he said, ‘I don’t have my wallet, so you’ll have to sort it.’

  George leapt out of the taxi before it fully stopped. The door to the building was closed. He pushed it hard a couple times, but it didn’t budge. He pressed the buzzer. It was after office hours. He pressed the other two buzzers … and kept his hand on them.

  ‘Sounds like someone’s keeping their finger on the frigging thing,’ Rob muttered.

  Susie sat bolt upright and looked at Rachael and Rob in horror. ‘It’s not the police is it?’ What if he had remembered and reported it and they’d come to arrest her?

  Rob, who had headed over to the window to view the entrance below, started chuckling. ‘It’s all right, Suse. I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t be laughing right now but this is too much. It’s not the police. George Silbury is trying to get in.’

  Susie slowly turned to Rachael. ‘You told me he didn’t remember.’

  ‘He didn’t. I don’t know if he does now. I’ll go down,’ Rachael said, standing up.

  ‘I’ll come with you,’ Rob promptly said, already moving towards her. ‘He’s most likely not going to be happy with you.’

  Susie was now on her feet, too. ‘Don’t. You. Dare. Nobody is going downstairs.’ She spoke with deliberate calm.

  With a grin, Rob plonked himself down on the sofa again, crossed his arms, and looked expectantly at Susie and Rachael.

  ‘We’re going to pretend none of this has happened,’ Susie continued. ‘We’re going to pretend George Silbury is not at the door downstairs. We’re going to pretend I have not brazenly assaulted him. And then he’ll go away. When I know I can trust you to stay put, I will take a shower.’

  Susie walked to the flat’s main door, turned the key in the lock, removed it, and pocketed it. She went to Rachael’s handbag, found her key in the midst of all her crap, and pocketed that, too. Rachael stood motionless throughout, her indignation evident from the sounds that kept escaping her.

  Susie headed for the shower. Even if they buzzed him in, he couldn’t get through the inner security door. Sorted. If the police were called, of course, that would be another matter. But she wasn’t going to consider that right now.

  As the water rolled over her she attempted to come to terms with what she’d done. And couldn’t. She tried again to remember what had happened after she’d entered Rachael’s consulting room. And couldn’t. All it did was give her a blinding headache. She turned the flow of water down. It was too much for her overly sensitised body. She was beyond sick. Her body had reacted to her assault of George Silbury. She had a history of abnormal reactions to the man, but evidently she wasn’t just screwed in the head: she was dangerous.

  She could never see George Silbury again. In 2D or 3D.

  ‘He’s still down there,’ Rob advised from his perch by the window. ‘And he doesn’t look happy. Drenched and smouldering more like. I’m surprised there’s not steam coming off him.’

  ‘I know he’s still down there,’ Rachael muttered. ‘He’s still leaning on the flaming buzzer! Can you believe she locked the bathroom door? She must have got the lock fixed. I can’t even get in there and retrieve the keys. She has no right. This is not meant to happen. How are they supposed to get together if she does things like this?’

  Rob swung around to look at her intently. ‘They are supposed to get together? What are you up to, Rach? I can’t make head nor tail of what’s going on right now and—’

  The buzzer stopped.

  Rob abruptly turned to the window again. ‘He’s still there, talking to that woman you say is his sister. They look like they might be arguing. He’s got his mobile out, is dialling a number and …’

  Rob spun around as Rachael’s mobile began to ring. He slowly shook his head at her.

  ‘Yes! Yes! Yes!’ she cried, scooting across the room. There was a yelp. ‘Matey! I’m sooo sorry. I didn’t see you there. Please forgive me.’ What had she done with her phone? It had been on her desk downstairs. She’d had it to call 999. ‘I gave my card and number to his sister … Yes!’ She found her phone in the pocket of the suit jacket she’d been wearing, and immediately accepted the call.

  ‘I have no idea what you did to me, but I do know I owe an apology to Susie. So will you please open the damned door?’

  No introductions. Straight to the point. Assertive. He was angry and definitely smouldering. His voice was … Along with his looks, it was why half the planet lusted after him.

  ‘I’m afraid Susie is indisposed,’ Rachael said, meeting Rob’s narrowed eyes from his new position back on the sofa. She looked away quickly.

  ‘Don’t give me that. Open the door. You can’t do something like this to me and then not let me attempt to put it right. You are dangerous. Playing around with people’s heads and—’

  ‘You have no right to take that tone with me. You were past life regressed, as simple as that. Your actions during that regression may have been … unusual, but had nothing to do with me. They were down to you. You got it into your head to launch yourself at my best friend and no one’s to blame for that but you. I’ve never experienced anything like it. It was shocking. If you have some kind of …’ Dare she? Would this work? ‘… repressed psychotic tendencies then—’

  ‘Repressed psychotic tendencies?’ he spluttered.

  She couldn’t believe she’d had the balls to say it, but hopefully it would have the necessary impact. She refused to look at Rob.

  ‘I can’t even remember what I did. I let you hypnotise me and the next thing I know …’ There was a pause. ‘Did I scare her?’

  Rachael smirked and, signalling with her hands for Rob to move over, dropped onto the sofa next to him. She leant back to get comfortable, and absently stroked Matey who had leapt into the overly large gap that had formed between the two of them. Matey purred and moved on to her lap, while Rob sat with his arms crossed, shaking his head. Rachael focused on her hands as she continued the conversation. ‘I wouldn’t worry. I doubt Susie will press charges. She wants to put it all firmly behind her. Her regaining consciousness to find you pinning her to the floor though was the stuff of nightmares.’

  There was silence as he evidently absorbed the new information. ‘Is she seriously indisposed, or is she avoiding me? God knows I don’t blame her.’

  ‘Both. But give it a few days and she may be more amenable.’

  ‘I don’t know what came over me.’

  ‘You don’t remember then?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘Could you put your sister on?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘I want Susie’s number first.’

  Rachael rattled it off with a smug grin and, after listening to his request that she relay his mortification to Susie, was put through to Cassie.

  ‘I just blurted it out. I’m not thinking straight.’ Cassie didn’t sound good. ‘He’s beside himself. I just wanted him to stop going on, but didn’t mean for this. All he needs is an opportunity to apologise.’

  ‘No can do, I’m
afraid. It didn’t go too well this end either, but I’ll work on her. Look, I know all this is freaking you out, but I can help. I’ve been there myself. I know we didn’t hit it off in the past, but let bygones be bygones and all that malarkey. Getting Susie and George together will help us both, I promise. Just call me when you’re ready to talk, yeah?’

  As the call terminated Rachael sat for a moment with the phone resting against her mouth. She was still stroking Matey and took a moment to absorb the reassurance his presence provided. When she had found out Susie was Hannah … Holy moly, freaking out hadn’t begun to go there. That night ten years ago hadn’t been good for either of them. She’d had her suspicions, but confirmation had been something else.

  Rachael took a deep breath and shook her head. Finally though, there was a chance to put things right. She caught Rob’s eye. His intent gaze changed to a more quizzical one. No, make that suspicious. And disapproving. She wished he wouldn’t look at her like that.

  ‘What are you up to, Rach? What aren’t you telling me?’ His look changed to one of concern. ‘I don’t want to see Susie hurt. This talk of getting her together with George Silbury? He’s George Silbury! While Suse is a looker, she was hardly looking her best earlier. And it doesn’t even sound like she wants to get together with him. And he’s connected with Porsche Sutter-Blythe.’

  ‘You don’t need to worry. I know what I’m doing. I don’t want to see Suse hurt either. She won’t be hurt. Quite the opposite. And now they’ve met, it should happen with or without me. It’s down to what they are. But with Susie’s hang-ups … I need to ease the process along and make sure all runs like clockwork. I owe them at least that much.’

  He was frowning. Rachael refocused on her hands, still stroking Matey. She shook her head and smiled ruefully. She knew the answer, but asked the question anyway. ‘Do you believe in Soul Mates, Rob?’

  And yep. She’d glanced up and his face had blanked. Rachael sighed. ‘I knew the answer to that one. And I also know you humour me. Past lives, Soul Mates, Matey – the lot. And I’m afraid if you don’t believe in that stuff, you’re not going to understand the explanation. You don’t, do you? I’m right, aren’t I? I know I’m right.’

  His lack of belief in past lives was why she’d not told him they’d encountered each other before. There was humouring and then there was humouring, and the last thing she wanted was to risk their friendship. Her life had been so enhanced since he and Matey had arrived. Not everyone welcomed being told about a past life. And, in any event, it’s not as if he’d come to her to be past life regressed. He knew where to come if he wanted to be.

  There was a guilty grin on Rob’s face as he fixed his eyes on his own hands. They rested together on his long muscular legs. With his head looking down like that, his blond hair had flopped over part of his face but she could still see his dimples. It’s a shame she couldn’t tell him she remembered him. She’d have happily described how he’d been admired from afar. How good he’d looked in breeches. How hot he’d been then … too.

  Rachael felt heat rise to her face … and guilt. She snapped her eyes back to Matey who she began to stroke with renewed vigour.

  ‘It’s not humouring, Rach. It’s for you to believe what you want to believe. It’s not for me to judge.’

  ‘Thank you,’ she said. And it was heartfelt.

  ‘But no, I don’t believe in past lives, reincarnation, Soul Mates and …’ She noticed his threaded hands upon his lap, clench tightly together. She thought he may have glanced up at her and then back down again. His upper body moved as he took in a deep breath. He raised his head to look at her. She felt obliged to meet that look. ‘You really believe Matey is your Soul Mate, don’t you? The one destined for you?’

  She couldn’t quite make out the expression in those eyes of his but it was disconcerting. She looked back down at Matey. She recalled the moment that he’d leapt into her arms and how she’d just known. It had been an OMG moment, just as she’d expected it would be. Of course things weren’t exactly as she’d expected them to be … She swallowed painfully. ‘I do,’ she said quietly. ‘I really do.’

  There was a long pause from Rob as he concentrated on his hands which were now flexing and un-flexing themselves on his lap. He must have seen her watching them, as he murmured, ‘Cramp,’ before asking, ‘Who was he?’

  ‘I’m sorry?’

  ‘Who do you think Matey was? Who is this long lost Soul Mate love of yours you are convinced has come back …’ He inhaled deeply and audibly, ‘… as a cat?’

  ‘I don’t know.’

  She felt his eyes drilling into her. ‘You don’t know?’

  ‘No,’ she confessed quietly. ‘I’ve most likely not recalled that past life yet.’

  ‘You don’t remember him? So how on earth can you know he’s your Soul Mate?’

  She shook her head and smiled, raising her eyes to meet his. ‘You don’t have to remember your Soul Mate like that to recognise him for who he is. And you most definitely don’t have to have been regressed. You simply need to meet. I’ve always known what to expect, but with Matey it’s not … With Matey it’s … complicated.’

  ‘What had you expected?’ Rob asked quietly. ‘What had you always known to expect because I so get that Matey might be complicated!’ He abruptly lowered his head again, this time, shaking it, too.

  And Rachael knew how this was going to sound. Explaining about Soul Mates as she knew them to be was difficult enough as it was. She didn’t understand why people seemed to struggle with the concept. Indeed, why everyone didn’t know about them. She couldn’t remember a time she hadn’t. Her best guess was that everyone did know about them – the potential for ultimate love – but that they simply didn’t listen to their heart and soul. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Because with Matey on the scene it made such explanations … all the flaming harder! She didn’t even fully understand Matey herself, so how could she possibly expect others to? And this was Rob. She really didn’t want him to think she was mad. She took another deep fortifying breath and said, ‘Thunderbolts.’

  Rob remained focused on his hands. After a pause, he said, ‘Go on.’

  ‘You’re asking what I expected, right?’

  He nodded. ‘Go on.’

  ‘Okay. Thunderbolts as I’ve already said. But with Soul Mates we’re also talking of the force of your reaction to each other, the depth of what you feel being so extreme it might not even be of this world. Soul Mates aren’t like mates in an animal sense – or shouldn’t be,’ Rachael added defensively, pre-empting any reaction Rob might have felt inclined to give at that point. ‘It’s beyond that. But look what an animal will do to secure and protect its mate? And once you’ve experienced the total sense of rightness, the ecstasy, the bliss, the enhancement upon every one of your senses, the sheer joy in living and loving and being loved – a Soul Mate will attempt to overcome anything to keep it. Even death. It may take time. It may take lifetimes. Some may never find him. But you’re not completely whole until you’re united. And so often you don’t know what you’ve been missing until you find each other again. It’s so way beyond love per se. It’s “the love”. Love with otherworldly, supernatural cherries on top. Love between the one you were always meant to be with. It’s ultimate. It’s extreme. It’s … The Real Deal. I’ve never been good at explaining it, but that’s how it goes.’

  Rob was silent. She braved a glance at him. ‘I know what you’re going to say,’ she said.

  ‘Just bear with me a moment,’ he said, apparently struggling with his words. But he was shaking his head forcefully. He now raised it and said, ‘It’s no good. I’ve not a hope! I cannot possibly react to this diplomatically and humour you.’

  ‘Rob—’

  ‘You are saying you feel that for Matey? That Matey feels that for you?’

  ‘Yes, No. Not
exactly. I told you he’s … complicated and quite possibly a blip. If he’s not a blip, then it raises—’

  ‘Have you any idea how you are sounding?’

  ‘I know exactly how I’m sounding and just knew how this conversation was going to go. But please don’t let Matey affect your belief in—’

  ‘How can it not? I couldn’t possibly believe in Soul Mates anyway, but with—?’

  ‘I feel it, Rob. Don’t you think it would be easier for me to deny it? I know how I sound. But I feel it, I do, and I can’t possibly deny it. It wouldn’t be fair on me, or him. What he’s come back as isn’t his fault. It’s not as it should be, I know that, of course I do. With what he is, the lack of reciprocation, how can it possibly feel as it should? It’s all so bittersweet and frustrating. So frustrating! But it’s there. There’s no mistaking it. Millions of Buddhists believe souls aren’t just reincarnated into humans but animals too. It just never featured in what I’ve always known. But I felt the thunderbolt, Rob. It was plain as day. And while this is difficult, what I feel is still so much better than nothing. I can’t feel it all, of course I can’t, but he comforts me. Emotionally, it’s as if he supports me. I want reassuring right now because I don’t want you to think I’m mad. Not you. And he’s providing it. Right this very moment. I feel it. I feel what he is … here.’ Rachael placed her hand over her heart.

  Rob stood up abruptly. ‘I’ve remembered I need to be somewhere.’

  Matey promptly leapt from her lap to join him as he began to walk towards the door.

  ‘Rob?’ she pleaded. ‘I know I sound eccentric, kooky – just plain mad! But I’m not, I promise you. I really don’t want you to think that. It’s all really confusing, but I can’t deny how his presence makes me feel. And I’m right about Soul Mates. I so am!’

  ‘I know you believe what you’re saying,’ Rob said softly, still walking to the door. ‘And I don’t think you’re mad … although I haven’t a clue why not.’