Romancing the Soul

by Sarah Tranter

  ‘I should have pulled out of the film! I should have sacked Michael and we should be in Peru!’

  ‘See? See what I’m saying! And I wondered when you’d mention Peru. I saw you googling for the driest places on earth last night! You have to snap out of this. I don’t know what else I’m supposed to say or do to reassure you. It is coincidence! Coincidence! History does not repeat itself, love. You know it doesn’t. In your lucid moments, you know… And if that simple fact isn’t enough, Rach is involved. Rach!’

  Rachael was going to regret ever having been born when Susie finally caught up with her. No wonder she’d been in hiding. How dare she do this to George! It was eating away at him and … his nightmares. His nightmares were terrible. And Susie had no idea what she could possibly say, or do, to stop him worrying like this.

  Susie gentled her tone again. ‘I’ve humoured you on the Soul Mates.’ Their eyes met. ‘I want to believe in it too, love, I really do …’ She couldn’t allow herself to be distracted from the task in hand here. ‘But history repeating itself? It is the most ridiculous thing to have ever come from her mouth. It even beats Matey! And to think she’s sucked your sister into this, too.’

  ‘I don’t think history is repeating itself,’ George declared. ‘It’s a ludicrous idea. I can’t – won’t – give any credence to it. And you don’t need to warn me about Rachael bloody Jones, or my sister, come to that. I get it, okay? It’s coincidence. I know it is. Definitely know it is. Totally know it is. But it doesn’t mean, I’m going to tempt fate and—’

  ‘Oh my God! You mentioned Fate! That’s one of Rachael’s too!’

  ‘Susie! You know what I’m trying to say here. While I won’t – don’t – believe it, it doesn’t mean I want to see you near water, near Porsche, or near Michael.’

  His look silenced her intended interruption. ‘That has nothing to do with who they were in the past or history repeating itself, and everything to do with what they’re up to now. The facts remain: you can’t swim and they are evidently trying to split us up!’

  ‘But they can’t! Don’t you see? We’re onto Michael, and we all agreed keeping him on is the best way to watch him. Keeping your enemies close and all that. We’ve always been onto Porsche, and there is nothing, absolutely nothing she can do, or say, now that will make me believe her delusional lies. So exactly what are they supposed to be able to do to split us up? Why should we hide? Why—’

  ‘The horse, Susie! You think it’s safe to be—’

  ‘We’ve talked about this,’ Susie said gently, reaching over to lay her hand over his tightly clenched, now white one. ‘Oh, George, Michael was not involved and—’

  ‘We don’t know that though, do we?’ George ground out, removing his right hand from the steering wheel to scrub across his face. ‘He would have had access to the props … to the gun!’

  ‘All right, all right, let’s look at it this way then. Even if history were repeating itself, they still can’t touch us! Things ended up how they did last time because there wasn’t trust. Don’t you see that? Hannah, no matter her love for Freddie, ultimately didn’t trust him. He didn’t betray her, with your input I can see that, but she betrayed him. If she had only believed in him things wouldn’t have ended how they did. She wouldn’t have been running around that lake at night, not caring whether she lived or died … And Freddie wouldn’t have—’

  Susie broke off the sentence, unable to continue. Hannah hadn’t just betrayed Freddie. She’d killed him. He’d ended his life rather than continuing without her. According to George, Cassie even had the letter Freddie wrote before he threw himself into that same lake that had claimed Hannah. The letter had remained hidden in their hole in the tree for decades. It was so tragic. She and George had shared so many tears over their ‘memories’, but neither of them was prepared to re-read the words. And the tragedy had all been Hannah’s doing, all because she hadn’t trusted him.

  ‘Susie?’ George said gently. ‘You can’t blame Hannah. Everyone and their dog seemed to be working against them, manipulating and feeding them lies. And seeing Freddie and Prudence together was damning. Freddie shouldn’t have been stupid enough to get himself into such a situation. Believe me, he blamed himself for that. And she was so young.’

  Susie met George’s eyes. ‘You know I trust you, don’t you? One hundred per cent.’ He held her intense look, before darting his eyes back to the road, and rapidly correcting his steering.

  ‘I did before, too, if I’m honest with myself,’ Susie continued. ‘My heart did. But since you filled me in on things, since I now know Freddie didn’t do the dirty … well, I don’t fear betrayal at all!’ Susie suddenly realised what she’d admitted and decided a caveat was needed. ‘Having said that, if you ever—’

  George managed a laugh – oh this was better – and stretched across to give her a kiss on the cheek. ‘You’ve nothing to fear there. And I trust you, too.’

  ‘As long as we trust each other we are invincible, George. Do you see? We don’t need to run. We don’t need to hide. We can sing from the rooftops. As long as we trust in us, then there is no chance at all history can repeat itself. In fact, Michael and Porsche can screw themselves! And it’s liberating. I want you to be feeling it, too. It’s an incredible sensation. We will not lose each other. I’ve been haunted by loss and betrayal and insane eye obsessions for ten years, but now, for the first time, I can—’

  ‘Insane eye obsessions? Whose eyes were you obsessed with?’ George growled.

  Susie stared at him. He was jealous! It made her feel all gooey inside. How could he think she could possibly have been interested in someone else’s eyes? They hadn’t met, she supposed, but she realised now, once she’d seen …

  ‘Whose eyes?’

  She grinned. She couldn’t help it and it got broader as the furrow in George’s forehead deepened.

  ‘You’ve got beautiful eyes, George,’ she ventured.

  ‘Susie!’

  ‘Oh yours, for heaven’s sake! Your eyes do something to me and have done for a decade.’

  ‘But I haven’t known you for a decade.’

  ‘Hence the “insane” bit,’ she murmured.

  ‘Susie?’ George prompted when she didn’t continue. ‘Susie!’

  ‘All right! Ever since I saw you in Dalek Zombies, I’ve—’

  ‘Dalek Zombies?’ he groaned.

  ‘Rach had just done her freaky regression thing …’

  He looked at her too intently for someone who was supposed to be driving. ‘And …?’

  ‘The road – please! And … I thought your eyes were … beautiful.’

  ‘In Dalek Zombies? Weren’t they bloodshot or something?’

  ‘They were beautiful. You’re going to think I’m nuts, but—’

  ‘Sweetheart, I’ll never think you’re nuts. You are the sanest and wisest person I know.’

  Under the circumstances she was glad he thought so. She beamed at him.

  Grinning lopsidedly, he continued, ‘Not hard, of course, when you see what I’m surrounded with. Cassie, Michael, Porsche, Rachael blo—’ He broke off on a chuckle as Susie thumped him on the shoulder.

  ‘Owww! I was serious though. How the hell you managed to keep your sanity living with that woman, I’ve no idea. Anyway, how nuts can it be with what’s been going on lately?’

  A most valid point. ‘I thought they were beautiful, but also …’ She sat back in her seat and shut her eyes. She’d never ever told anyone this and admitting it to George, even with the Freddie and Hannah thing, it still sounded crazed.

  ‘Susie?’ he prompted, gently.

  She clenched her eyes more tightly shut. She had no choice here. ‘I thought I was going mad because whenever I saw your eyes it was as if … as if they were trying to tell me something. Every time I saw you on the scree
n, or in a magazine, or even on the side of a bus, I got this feeling that … Well, like I said, I thought I was going mad.’

  There was silence. A long silence. Too long a silence. Susie winced. There had been a very good reason for not telling him this. She braved turning her head to open her eyes a crack.

  George had his seat belt off, was turned in his seat and was staring at her. Confused, she opened her eyes fully, shot a look out of the windscreen and saw that they had arrived at the hotel. She hadn’t even realised they’d left the motorway, let alone stopped.

  ‘I told you it was insane,’ she groaned. ‘Even now, knowing what we do.’

  He slowly shook his head, not removing his eyes from hers. ‘You’re telling me you had a reaction to me for ten years – ten years! – and you did nothing about it?’

  ‘I should have got help, I know. I told you it was mad, but I promise I’m not—’

  ‘Susie!’ he cried, reaching out to cradle her face in his hands. ‘I’m not talking about getting help. I’m talking about getting in touch with me! How could you have let ten years go by? Ten years in which we could have been together.’

  Susie shook her head now. ‘It wasn’t like that. How could I possibly know we’d hit it off, that we had … history! I just thought it was about losing my mind.’

  ‘No,’ he rumbled, shaking his head forcefully. He moved his face closer while one of his hands unclipped her seat belt. ‘It was about you being mine.’ His lips were against hers. ‘Always mine.’

  Oh she was.

  Hand in hand they walked past the fountain and across the crunching gravel towards the hotel reception. George swallowed hard as Susie slowed. He attempted to keep her moving, but she was resisting his tugs on her hand, and was now giving the fountain her full attention.

  And perfect! Bloody perfect! She had turned, keenly taking in the wider grounds and … He started to rub his forehead. He hadn’t spotted the pond off the main driveway … but Susie evidently had.

  She snatched her hand from his and faced him. ‘George?’ she asked, in an overly calm voice, not at all an appropriate accompaniment to the hurricane storminess of her eyes. ‘Why are the water features boarded up?’

  And what the hell could he say? He decided to say it how it was. ‘It’s sensible. It’s better to be safe than sorry. I challenge anyone in my position not to do the same! And I’d do it all over again!’

  She stared at him long and hard, before she slowly shook her head. She then spun herself around and started marching furiously towards the hotel.

  His actions were sensible! History repeating itself? It was coincidence. He had to tell himself that if he had any hope of keeping his sanity here. But what if it wasn’t? What if …? And then there was that little matter of what felt ominously like a sixth sense. He knew history didn’t repeat itself. He knew that. Yet past lives existed so … he could not take the risk. Would not take the risk. Not where Susie was concerned.

  Rachael bloody Jones’s most recent words replayed over in his head. ‘Do what you must with the lake,’ she said. ‘Just know, if history is repeating itself and she’s fated to drown, there’s nothing you can do about it. And really it could as easily happen in a bath than in a lake. There will be no cheating it.’

  George sprinted into the hotel.

  Oh my angel, my dearest, darling angel

  I am coming for you, my love. With or without breath, I will allow NOTHING to part us. Know I was true to you, how could I ever not be?

  Be ready for me.

  Yours forever, Freddie

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  ‘Remind me why you’re here?’ Susie asked, moving her eyes from the lake in front of her to look from first one, and then to glower at the other.

  ‘He’s my brother. And until this has stopped …’ Cassie’s words died away.

  ‘Lake scene?’ Rachael declared, as if she couldn’t believe the stupidity of the question.

  ‘How did you get in here?’ Susie narrowed her eyes on Rachael. ‘Surely security knew better. I’m assuming you got my voicemails? Only you would be stupid enough to appear before someone who wants to—’

  ‘George sorted it,’ Rachael interrupted, pointing to her security pass. ‘I told him I wanted to patch things up with you and, after I solemnly vowed not to talk to you about “history repeating itself”, he rolled over. He thinks you still love me and miss me and wants to see you happy. So I’m officially here. And I do miss you, Suse.’

  Susie took a deep controlling breath but knew her eyes were glinting. She missed her, too. But this wasn’t just about Rachael lying to her for a decade, which she had by not telling her about Tessa, or even about her not revealing what happened in her consulting room. It was about what she’d managed to do to George.

  He wasn’t even sleeping. And when he did, he’d wake screaming, heart pounding uncontrollably, drenched in sweat, and it would take hours for Susie to calm him down, reassure him she was there. To attempt to convince him, all over again, history did not repeat itself. George asserted he didn’t believe it, but his subconscious and his actions spoke far louder than his words. And nothing Susie could say or do seemed capable of relieving him of his fears.

  Rachael continued, ‘I couldn’t, of course, tell him I refused to miss him emerging from the water all wet, clothes clinging … Never thought I’d say it, but eat your heart out Colin Firth.’

  Susie’s eyes narrowed to slits and she found herself needing to consciously take very deep breaths.

  ‘Although,’ Rachael said innocently, ‘I must ask. Why are we so far away from the lake?’

  Susie shut her eyes. Breathe in. Breathe out. In. Out.

  Rachael knew damned well why they were so far from the lake. And it was all her fault! Just like the bath! All that was presently off in her and George’s lives was down to Rachael. Or at least that’s how it felt.

  Not that technically only being able to have baths with George was unpleasant. She concentrated on stopping the tingling hot flush she could feel spreading. But she liked having baths on her own! It was her right!

  And after all the issues Rachael had caused, she dared to stand before her talking of watching George come out of the water all wet and … Her George.

  ‘Looks like Slutty-Blythe is going to have a far better view than you. And I bet his clothes cling in all the right places. Not that you’ll see that right back here. Unlike her.’

  ‘Rachael,’ Cassie growled.

  ‘Trust me,’ Rachael murmured. ‘I know what I’m doing.’

  Susie snapped her eyes open and scanned for the bitch.

  Yes. There she was. No more than ten metres away from the way-too-small-from-this-distance George and in prime viewing position.

  ‘I never thought you’d be someone to do what a man told you. Or to let that witch catch an eye full.’

  ‘What are you doing?’ Cassie hissed. ‘You know exactly why she’s back here and there can be no better reason! How can you possibly—?’

  Susie stopped listening.

  As if Porsche had sensed Susie’s eyes on her, she had turned, held her look – if the raised hairs on the back of her neck were anything to go by – and was in the process of … smirking! Oh, Susie was sure it was a smirk, even from this distance. How dare she? How bloody dare she?

  Rachael and Cassie had evidently stopped arguing to observe the interaction. ‘Look away,’ Cassie instructed quietly.

  ‘I have no intention of cowering from her,’ Susie replied, giving the impression of calm. ‘He’s mine. And there’s nothing she can do about it.’

  ‘Unfortunately, she doesn’t seem to have grasped that. There’s no point in winding her up. You need to stay away from her. And … you should know my brother is watching.’

  Susie immediately looked away to focus on
George. Oh my love. He was looking straight at her. She knew that for sure because she felt their eyes connect and then there was that injection of neat need she simultaneously received. But she could tell from his body language he was stressed. Even more stressed than his normal stressed-out status at present.

  He’d obviously just witnessed things. Like Cassie, and indeed Rachael on earlier occasions, he insisted Porsche and Michael should be avoided like the plague and was not remotely approving of Susie’s less passive inclinations.

  Susie smiled ruefully and placed her right hand over her heart. George did the same, before he bowed to her, all the time keeping his head up, their eyes locked.

  She should still be angry with him – the bath, the desecration of water features, Tom, Dick and Harry in Duracell mode – but it was impossible. She knew why he was doing what he was. Damn Rachael!

  ‘How attractive can a human male get?’ Rachael muttered. ‘There is something seriously wrong here. You end up with that and, in the very best case scenario, I end up with Puss in Boots!’

  Perhaps there was some justice in the world, Susie thought … before she saw red.

  Porsche had moved over to George. She was clearly attempting to talk to him, having to nearly jog to keep up with his long strides. But she’d cornered him at the water’s edge and he’d had to stop to listen to her.

  And she had her hands on his arms!

  ‘Are you going to let her get away with that?’ Rachael exclaimed.

  ‘Oh God,’ Cassie murmured.

  Rachael continued, ‘She’s no doubt coming on to him in a way only one of the most beautiful women in the world can. I wonder … does being a Soul Mate male automatically qualify one for sainthood status or does temptation still come into play?’

  The last thing Susie heard as she marched determinedly in George’s direction was Rachael saying, ‘I guess we’re going to find out. Don’t look at me like that, Cassie. She’s safe. And she’s going to be even safer after this. It’s a means to an end. She might hate me right now, but believe me I’m acting out of love. There’s a little bonus thrown in, too. I get to learn a bit more about Soul Mates. There are evident gaps in my knowledge and I can’t help but worry just how big they might be.’