12) A man who encourages education for children.
As you already know, most Russian women have a university degree. Because education is important to them, Russian women want to have an opportunity to give their children quality education as well.
13) A man who values traditions.
Russian women are very a traditional, they respect older people, they know their role in the family, they expect their man to be a provider, they know how to be a housewife, an excellent cook, and a wonderful wife to her husband, how to keep the house clean, and will respect their man. Even women-entrepreneurs or those with a career will maintain traditional values.
14) A man who respects other cultures.
Since you will be in a relationship with a foreign woman, it is important for you to respect her roots and where she came from. It doesn’t mean that you have to love what she cooks, reads or listens to, but you need to be considerate of her choices and avoid criticism. Try to open your mind to new possibilities and new experiences.
15) A patient man who can compromise.
Because you are in a relationship with a woman of a different culture and mentality, you will have plenty of opportunities to exercise patience and tolerance. Your woman will be plunged into a new country with different traditions and mentality, and it will be up to you to make her feel comfortable in the new environment. Because Russian women are very traditional, you will also need to show your ability to compromise in adjusting the two cultures.
The background of Russian women is the reason marriages between American men and Russian women become successful – this is also supported by the latest studies. Practical stability of American men and family values of Russian women help create long-term alliances thanks to the clear distribution of family roles. Many American men have compared Russian women with a breath of fresh air – this becomes only more evident in comparison with career focused American women.
What about Russians, or why American men are a better fit for beautiful girls from Russia
If you wonder why Russian men are selfish, unfaithful, alcoholics, and wife beaters, it is because Russian women made them this way. Because the ratio of men to women is about 1:4 (in some regions it is 1:7!), women have to work hard to keep a man by their side as there always will be another woman who will be ready to please him more. Since Russian women know that it is potentially difficult to find a good man (yes, there are some, but they are far and few between!), they hold on to men in their lives by putting up with many things they don’t like. Naturally, faithfulness is not a high priority for Russian men – they know they can easily find another woman to take care of all their needs.
––––– Resource! –––––—
The explanation of the unbelievable tolerance from Russian women is disclosed in my free video series “The Path to the Russian Heart”. You can get instant access to the series right after registering your free profile at www.OksanaLove.com/gift.
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Still, it is very difficult for Russian women to find a decent man. This is where American men come in. Because most Americans are active, decisive, and can handle responsibility (something that most Russian men can’t do), they are very attractive to Russian women - statistically, American men are among top sought after bachelors on Russian women’s list.
Below is a table where I compare Russian and American men. Aside from satisfying curiosity, I want this table to become a brief study guide for you: as you look for a Russian wife, I suggest you take time to evaluate your personal qualities and make necessary changes or make the most of the qualities you possess that would appeal to a Russian woman.
- Statistics are based on my experience and men that join dating services.
- Highlighted are the boxed with qualities that women like.
- Explanation of points with asterisk is listed under the table.
TRAITS
RUSSIAN MEN
AMERICAN MEN
NEED TO LEARN FROM RUSSIAN MEN?
Drinking
Yes (a lot)
Sometimes
No
Education
Yes
Sometimes
Yes
Smoking
Very often
Often
No
Faithfulness
Very uncommon
Almost always
No
Younger appearance
No
Yes
No
Healthier life style
No
Yes
No
Chivalrous
Yes
Uncommon (10%)
Yes
Poor personal hygiene
Yes
No
Hell, NO!
Sexual health and fitness maintained even after 50
No
Yes
No
Expect a woman to tidy their personal affairs or financial issues
Yes
Very uncommon
No
Help around the house with chores
Very uncommon
Yes
No
Cheating
Very common
Very seldom
NO, NO, NO!
Take care of their children even when divorced
Very uncommon
Very common
No
Cautious about getting women pregnant*
No
Yes
No
Always bears financial responsibility*
Yes
Uncommon
Yes/No
Speak their mind *
Yes
No
Yes
Demanding and in charge in sexual matters*
Yes
Uncommon
Yes/No
Remains involved in raising children
Very uncommon
Very common
No
Flashy, love to show off*
Yes
No
Yes/No
Will defend and protect under any circumstances
Yes
Not often
Yes
Always bears financial responsibility – a small correction: Russian men always bear financial responsibility when they are in love. They never question who will pay for a date (it is nonsense to go Dutch); they will definitely pay for a vacation if it is to be shared with his woman even if the two are not married; they will certainly pay for woman’s shopping, spa, etc. However, when they decide to move on to the next woman, it is highly unlikely for them to continue to support former partners financially. The latter attitude is not something to follow, but it is a good idea to take on the attitude of a Russian man in love.
Cautious about getting women pregnant – Russian men believe that it is a woman’s responsibility to be careful when it comes to getting pregnant; men don’t believe they have to stay around or participate in the upbringing of children if a woman becomes pregnant.
Speak their mind – American men are often afraid of hurting people’s feelings so they try to be diplomatic, but it is not always the best way to communicate with Russian women. Culturally, Russians are rather blunt; if you are not clear in your opinions or statements, there is much room for interpretation (read: misunderstanding).
Demanding and in charge in sexual matters – American men are more mindful of women’s wants and desires, but it isn’t always a good thing. Russian women like when a man takes the first step and shows initiative (a good thing about Russian men), but they like to be treated with respect and consideration once the relationship progresses (something Russian men lack).
Flashy, love to show off – Russian men are known for their bravado, they are like peacocks with their tails spread out. However, most of it happens when they are drunk. Russian women like some of such attitude – in their mind it is a sign of “manliness”, but you do
n’t want to overdo it as it will have a reverse effect.
Myths Russian women have about foreign men
Many Americans think Russia doesn’t have running water and that bears walk on the streets of Russian cities. But stereotypes go both ways, and there are some myths circulating about foreigners as well. When you hear them, you might get a better idea as to why Russian women react a certain way to foreign men.
Myth 1 - Foreigners are stupid.
One of the main causes for this is… Hollywood. Many American films and shows that have reached Russia are full of slapstick humour which is not really accepted by Russians. The result: Russians think that Americans laugh at stupid things. Some Russian comics have taken full advantage of this and have contributed by further inflating this idea through making fun of American culture (i.e. strange laws, habits, etc.).
Myth 2 – Foreigners always smile, even without any reason.
You will not see many smiling people on the streets of Russia, and it isn’t because Russians don’t like to or don’t know how to have fun. Most people in Russia think a person must have a good reason to smile, unless he or she is up to something or is making fun of somebody. It is very much a cultural thing – there is a time and a place for smiling and having fun, it is not something that happens commonly.
Another reason for such attitude is that ongoing challenges of life have also left a definite imprint on people’s attitudes – when a person is constantly occupied by trying to find ways to make both ends meet, he/she is not very likely to look at the brighter side of things.
Myth 3 – Americans are arrogant and cocky.
Unfortunately, many visitors from the US were the ones that created this stereotype. Many American visitors have often harshly criticized the way things are in Russia and have made loud claims that the United States is the only nation that has it right. Russians are very sensitive when it comes to criticism of their home: they know very well it is a mess, but it is theirs, and no one from abroad has room to criticize. As a result, Russian people have grown to resent Americans for such attitude and often transfer this stereotype on every visitor from the US, even if the person does not share such views.
Of course, things you find in Russia may often seem unusual or even strange to you, but the best thing you can do is ask about it and smile politely. Under no circumstances you should compare it to the way it is done in your country and claim that your people have the right solution, as this will most likely offend your hosts or native friends.
Myth 4 – If a man is using an online dating service to look for a wife (especially if he has never been married), there has to be something wrong with him.
Of course, there is little logic behind such thinking since thousands of Russian women are using the same services to look for a husband abroad, but, on the other hand, it is completely justified as Russian women know there is nothing wrong with them, but who knows about those foreigners? After all, many men from overseas wonder the same thing – why is it that beautiful, smart women look for partners outside of their home country? Negative publicity has significantly contributed to women fearing that a guy from a dating service will turn out to be a maniac or someone looking for a housekeeper or a babysitter for his children.
When you are corresponding with Russian women, be frank in explaining why you are still single, find a tactful way to mention that there is nothing physically or mentally wrong with you, and do not bring up sex or intimate subjects until you and your lady are comfortable with your relationship.
Myth 5 – Living abroad is a fairy tale; foreign men are stable, honest, generous, and kind.
While this idea has been slightly tarnished by select negative stories, Russian women still believe that living abroad will be a step above their life in Russia and that foreign men appreciate women more than men at home. However, do not think that Russian women expect something extraordinary from men – they simply want a normal relationship. They want for their mate to have good education and stable employment, they want him to take care of his family, to be attentive, and not be a drunkard.
Now, when you communicate with someone from Russia, you will know why people react funny when you smile at them or why they are shocked you haven’t been married by the age of 30. If you explain why you are the way you are, how things work in your country, and what you think/feel, you will avoid being labeled a “typical” foreigner and will be able to have a much better relationship with a Russian woman.
Russian woman will never be yours, if…
By now you know that a Russian woman is perfect for any man, but if you think that any man with a foreign passport is perfect for a Russian woman, think again. While a Russian woman will always stand by her man and can forgive many things, some categories of men will never appeal to her.
Group 1. Arrogant men thinking that any woman would jump into their arms when they flash an American passport. What a huge mistake to think so! I’ve lost count of how many men were told off, wasted money and, most importantly, never found a decent bride because of having this attitude.
Group 2. Close-minded men. Marrying a foreign woman means that you have to be open-minded – you can’t expect your Russian wife to isolate herself from her previous life, roots, culture, and traditions. I know many American men who demanded that their Russian wives stop listening to Russian songs, stop eating and cooking Russian food, and stop talking Russian to their friends. Seriously?! Russian women will change and adapt to American culture, but it will not happen overnight; and they will never give up their heritage, period.
Group 3. Messy men. There is nothing wrong with keeping your high-school memorabilia or your drawings from primary school, but if this stuff is piled up in your garage among dirty pizza boxes, you’ve got a problem (and not just from Russian women’s point of view). Russian women are very neat; they are excellent housewives, who keep clean, organized houses. If your house looks like a hurricane went through it when your woman comes to live with you, she is not going to be very happy. She will not make a scene, but she will clean and re-arrange everything. Don’t try to stop her, instead try to support her. If you are not ready for it, be prepared for a relationship disaster as your lady will not tolerate it for long.
Group 4. Overweight + sloppy + lazy + couch potato.
I don’t mean to offend anyone, but this issues has to be addressed. I understand that obesity can sometimes be a result of serious hormonal problems, but this is not what I am talking about. I am referring to eating-pizza-and-fast-food-all-day-long-followed-by-containers-of-beer type of obesity.
You picked up this book because you want to find a beautiful girl. It is only fair that a beautiful woman would want to see by her side a presentable, clean man who takes care of his health. After all, it requires a lot of work for any girl to stay beautiful and fit for her man, so why can she not expect that her man would want to do the same for her? If you were a beautiful woman, would you want to date a guy in the photo? No one would ever believe you if you said “yes”! Appearances don’t really matter to Russian women, but there is a certain level of self-respect that will keep any woman from being with a man so extremely neglected.
LESS EXTREME GROUPS:
Group 5. Men who don’t want to have children. As Russian women are generally very traditional, they almost always want to have children when creating a family. If you have children of your own and don’t plan to have more, but want to marry a young woman, you should seriously reconsider your position or look for a woman in her 40’s who has had children already and will not mind your choice.
Group 6. Hairy Harry. This is not a joke. Russian women do not like moustache and beards. They are sensitive, with very gentle skin, and don’t like kissing a man with hair on his face. They are not into long hair either – to them, long hair is a privilege of a woman and not something men should have. What they like is a classic European clean-cut look.
Group 7. Men who wear bad cologne. Again, this is not a joke. Russian men often
don’t smell very good because they don’t shower often, but they have figured out how to use fragrances. Russian women are very sensitive to smells, so the way you smell is important – if you don’t smell good, you won’t be attractive.
Give preference to smells like “Chanel Egoiste” or “Givenchi Blue” – these smells are sexy, business-man like, and very charming. If you tend to use “sweet” fragrances, get rid of them once and for all when meeting Russian women – such smells remind them of their grandfather’s colognes (they are even called “grandpa” fragrances).
Group 8. Men who dress badly. Russian women can tolerate many things, but they definitely aren’t fond of the “comfortable American style” – especially when it comes to favourite jeans and t-shirts, wrinkled and with holes. The best option is to wear a clean ironed shirt and slacks (maybe jeans) – it might seem like a small thing, but it helps to create a good impression. Once again, if you are looking for a beautiful woman who pampers and grooms herself to make you proud when you walk next to her, it is only fair that you do the same.
CHAPTER 4: A PERFECT START
Long before dating a Russian woman
You are certainly familiar with the term “the power of thought” – if you visualize something clearly, persistently, and long enough, your dream will come true. While I believe in this concept, it often acts as a stumbling block for men in their search – they become content with thinking and forget to act. If you truly want to find a gorgeous, smart woman as your partner, you need to be active, and you can easily achieve this goal in 90 days.
As with any other goal, you first need to decide on an acceptable timeframe. Instead of saying that you might meet your perfect woman someday, you need to set a specific date – after all, YOU are driving the process and making the decision as to when you want to meet her. This simple change will set your mind into an active mode, thus making your search more successful.
Russian Allure Page 4
