Her Silent Burden_Seeing Ranch series

by Florence Linnington

  One… two… three…

  She doubted she would be calm by the time she got to ten.

  Jacob had tested her patience many times before in the past, but never like this. Never to such an extreme. And the ways Rosalie found herself reacting frightened her.

  No longer was she only wondering what was happening to her son. She was left wondering what was happening to her, as well.

  “Jacob,” she said, looking straight at him. “I understand that you are frustrated right now, but if you insist on being constantly antagonistic with others, I am going to have to take drastic actions.”

  Jacob would not look her in the eye. “Did you invite Noah to the play?”

  “Yes, of course. He’s a member of this town.”

  “I don’t want him to come.”

  Rosalie’s inhale was hot. “He is coming as my guest.”

  Finally, Jacob looked at her, but instead of the fiery gaze Rosalie expected, she instead found eyes containing deep sadness. “Stop seeing him, Mother. Please.”

  Rosalie blinked, stunned at the pain in his voice. “Jacob… Why?”

  “Because you don’t need him.”

  “Oh, Jacob.” Rosalie felt all her strength leave her. It was a surprise she still managed to stand.

  “I mean that. Aren’t you…”

  “What, Jacob?” Rosalie held her breath, afraid to even exhale lest she scare away this rare moment of honesty.

  “Shouldn’t we go into school now?” Jacob asked, shouldering his bow. “It’s time for writing.”

  A punch in the stomach wouldn’t have hurt more.

  “We can talk about this after school,” she said.

  Jacob shrugged, already walking away.

  Rosalie bit the inside of her cheek, holding back the scream that wanted to rip loose. Just when she thought she was making some progress with Jacob, he retreated yet again, leaving her desperate and frustrated.

  As far as she was concerned, the conversation was not over. She would bring the topic up again that night. But whether or not Jacob would respond, who really knew?

  Chapter 13

  things would only get better

  13. Noah

  Chapter thirteen

  Putting the last chair on the floor and wiping its seat, Noah checked the clock. Fifteen minutes till the play started. He’d closed the saloon early for the day, not so the miners and Outpost’s other regular patrons could go to the school play, but so he could.

  The move to close on a Saturday had caused plenty of grumbles, but the men could take it. Most of them had liquor to drink at home, and if they didn’t and that caused chaos, well, maybe it was about time they rethought their habits.

  With the free morning, Noah deep cleaned the bar. It had been good keeping his hands busy. Not only was he excited to see Rosalie and the play, but he was nervous about something else as well.

  For years, ever since he left Virginia, he’d carried his mother’s wedding ring with him. She’d died years before, and as her only child, it had been passed down to him.

  Noah knew his ma wanted him to give it to the right woman someday. Finally, Noah had found that woman.

  It didn’t matter that it had been only a month. This was right for him. Noah couldn’t explain how he knew it, but he did. Course, there was still the whole issue with Jacob to contend with. That was the only reason Noah hadn’t bought that plot of land and got down on one knee in front of Rosalie. He didn’t want to mess things up further for them all.

  Jacob needed time to accept Noah into his life. All right then. Noah would give him that time. He would wait to make his move.

  But he couldn’t completely hold back. He needed Rosalie to at least know how serious he was about her. That’s why, that afternoon, though his mother’s ring still sat in the little box upstairs, Noah would be honest with Rosalie. He would tell her he’d fallen hard for her, and he hoped the relationship would one day go past a simple courtship.

  The thought of being so honest made Noah both excited and nauseous. He’d never said something like that to a woman. He’d never felt something like that.

  With one last glance at the clock, Noah let himself out the front door. A small group of people had already gathered in front of the schoolhouse, and they stood around chatting.

  Noah caught sight of Wakefield, Thea, and Aria, but he kept walking. There would be time for socializing after the play. Right then he was a man on a mission. Besides, right then he was practicing what he would say to Rosalie in his head. He couldn’t afford to talk to someone and to get distracted.

  The school’s backyard was set up with a small stage. Though it was roughly made, there was a curtain made from old quilts and even a rope to open the curtain with. In front of the stage, stumps were set up as seats. The schoolchildren milled about, some in costumes, all of them talking excitedly.

  Rosalie, wearing her blue Sunday dress, was the easiest to spot. She shone like the brightest star in the night sky, flitting around talking to this child and adjusting that child’s hat. Jacob wasn’t to be seen anywhere, and Noah assumed he was behind the curtain or somewhere else getting ready.

  Seeing how busy Rosalie was, Noah hesitated at the edge of the yard. It seemed he’d best save the speech he’d prepared for later.

  He started to walk away, but Rosalie had already noticed him. Leaving the children, she came forward.

  “Hello,” she smiled. Was it his imagination, or did she seem to shine a little brighter once she spotted him?

  “I was only coming to say hello,” Noah said, then cleared his throat. “I see you’re busy, so I’ll, uh, get on out of here.”

  Rosalie’s smile flickered. “I can talk for a minute.”

  Noah’s mouth was suddenly dry. Since he couldn’t talk, he nodded.

  Her eyebrows rose. “Noah? Are you well?”

  He opened his mouth, testing out his dry tongue. “Uh, well. Yes. Fine.”

  “You look a bit peaked.”

  “Do I?”

  “How do you feel?” She reached up and rested her hand against his forehead. Noah ached to draw her against him but kept his arms firmly at his sides.

  “Nervous,” he answered.

  Rosalie blinked in confusion. “About the play?”

  “No, about…” Noah swallowed. He might as well get this over with. “About telling you what you mean to me.”

  Rosalie’s eyes widened.

  “The truth is, Rosalie, I came over here because I couldn’t wait any longer to tell you how serious I am about you. I don’t know if you want this, but I see something more permanent for us. And I know this looks like strange timing, and we’ve only known each other a month, but I had to step in and declare myself before some other man did. I hope you can understand that and forgive me if I’m coming across too blunt.”

  Time seemed to stretch out, all the sounds around Noah slowing down. The children laughing. The birds singing. It all took on an eerie, extended quality as he waited for Rosalie’s response.

  Finally… she smiled.

  “Noah,” Rosalie said, “I… goodness.”

  “I only wanted to tell you that. I’ll go now.”

  “Wait.” She touched his arm. “I feel the same way about you. I see… us together.”

  She bit her bottom lip, suddenly looking shy. Pride rose in Noah’s chest. This beautiful, amazing, strong woman wanted him.

  Still, the conversation was odd. They were talking about marriage without really saying the word.

  “Miss Flinn!” one of the little girls called. “Help! My flowers are falling off!”

  “Stop tugging on them,” another girl responded.

  Rosalie gave Noah an apologetic look. “I must go.”

  “I know. I’ll see you after. Have a good show.”

  “Yes,” Rosalie agreed. “Thank you. And we can continue this conversation.”

  The earnestness on her face made Noah smile. “Absolutely.”

  Rosalie hurried away,
going to tend to the girl with the flowers falling off her costume. Out of the corner of his eye, Noah caught movement behind the stage’s makeshift curtain.

  When he looked directly at the stage, though, no one was there. The curtain swung like someone had just touched it, and yet no one was in sight.

  Noah frowned, an odd feeling entering his gut. For some reason he couldn’t explain, something felt off.

  Likely, he was still experiencing some nerves. His body hadn’t caught wind of the good news yet: Rosalie wanted him. From here on out, things would only get better.

  Chapter 14

  unbelievably helpless

  14. Rosalie

  Chapter fourteen

  Though Rosalie’s hands were busy tending to costumes, her mind and heart were elsewhere. She should have been wholly focused on the play, but she could not help but think about Noah’s declaration.

  Noah! She could not stop thinking about him. The anxiety he’d displayed upon showing up had seemed odd, but it made perfect sense now. He was nervous because he wanted her.

  Well, she certainly understood that. Their relationship, wonderful as it was so far, was entirely new to her. Every once in a while, she got to wondering herself whether or not it could last.

  But now it seemed it could. Because both she and Noah wanted it to.

  “Are you happy, Miss Flinn?” Minnie asked her.

  Rosalie laughed. “Yes, I am very excited about the play.”

  “And about her beau,” Margie added.

  Rosalie gasped. “Margie, were you eavesdropping?”

  “No, Miss Flynn. I promise. It’s that everyone knows Noah Hahn is your beau.”

  Rosalie felt her cheeks grow warm at the same time pride filled her. “Hush now. It’s time to get behind the stage. Your parents are starting to show up.”

  Done with Minnie’s costume, Rosalie stood and ushered the last of the children behind the stage. A couple of the actors, Jacob included, plus the stagehands had been waiting there for a good while now, ready and eager to put on the play.

  Smoothing her hair from her face, Rosalie turned and smiled at the parents walking her way. Hand after hand she shook, as what seemed to be every person in town came into the yard. Not only were all the parents there, but many of the miners had come as well. It seemed Whiteridge was ravenous for a little bit of entertainment.

  As the townsfolk either settled on the stumps or found places to stand in the yard, the children whispered behind the curtain. The line of people waiting to greet Rosalie dwindled, and she found Noah standing at the end of it.

  “Oh, hello,” she said. “Haven’t we already shaken hands?”

  “I’d like to do more than that,” Noah said in a low voice, so no one else could hear.

  Rosalie blushed and shook his hand. “It’s good to see you, Mr. Hahn.”

  “You too, Miss Flinn,” he said, his gaze never straying from her face. They’d been shaking hands for a good thirty seconds, and it seemed he had no intention of stopping.

  “I need to make my announcement now,” Rosalie said, though she did not let go of his hand.

  “You do that,” he grinned, finally letting go and going to stand along the side of the crowd.

  Clasping her hands, Rosalie climbed onto the stage, going to stand in front of the closed curtain. Once there, she saw just how many of the towns people had congregated. It had to be at least a few dozen.

  Her heart pounded in the base of her throat, and she could not seem to find her voice. Never before had she stood in front of so many people. How on Earth would she even find the strength to open her mouth?

  And then she caught sight of Noah. He watched her with a smile on his face, with softness in his eyes. He believed in her.

  With new strength filling her, Rosalie cleared her throat and began speaking. “Good afternoon, Whiteridge. In case we have not met before, I am Rosalie Flinn, the new school teacher. I would like to welcome everyone to our play. The students have been working hard on it for days now, and are eager to perform it for you. I do want to say rest assured: rehearsals have not gotten in the way of regular study time.”

  There were a few chuckles, though Rosalie had not meant to be funny. Still, hearing others loosen up made her do the same. Smiling wider, she went on.

  “The production is called The Magical Forest. It is a comedy the children have written themselves. They have also created the props, the set, and the costumes, with minimal assistance from me. I am very proud of their accomplishments, and I hope you will be too. Thank you, and enjoy the show.”

  There was a round of applause, and Rosalie stepped off the stage and to the side of it. Noah caught her eye and winked, and she winked back.

  The older boys pulled the curtain open, and onto the stage appeared Margie and Minnie.

  “Hark! Who goes there?” little Minnie cried dramatically. “Be you friend or foe?”

  “It is I,” Margie replied. “The protector of this forest.”

  Rosalie glanced at the canvas thrown over some branches behind the stage. It served as a dressing room and place for the actors to hide when not on stage. Jacob would be coming out in a couple lines and making his grand appearance. For some reason, she was nervous for him.

  “Who will test me?” Margie asked. “Will anyone?”

  Rosalie looked at the canvas, waiting for Jacob to come out and cry, “I will!”

  A long moment passed. Margie paled and looked to Rosalie.

  Rosalie pointed upward, signaling for the girl to speak louder.

  “Who will test me?” Margie nearly shouted.

  Jacob did not appear.

  Rushing across the grass, Rosalie ducked under the canvas. “Jacob,” she hissed, “It is your line.”

  “He’s not here, Miss Flynn,” Bobby said.

  “What?” She stared at the three children standing there. “Where is he?”

  “He left,” Anna replied.

  Rosalie’s stomach turned to ice. “What do you mean he left, Anna?” she demanded.

  “Before we started,” Anna whispered. “He made me promise not to tell you.”

  “Right before the play? Where did he go?”

  None of the children answered.

  “Tell me right now,” Rosalie said. “Did he go home?”

  “I don’t know, Ma’am,” Anna replied. “He didn’t say. He had a rucksack with him, though.”

  A terror Rosalie did not know could exist struck her. In horror, she pressed her fingers to her lips.

  “Miss Flynn?” Anna asked.

  Murmurs came from the other side of the canvas. People were wondering what the holdup was. But the play no longer mattered. Nothing mattered but finding Jacob.

  A rucksack? Just where did he plan on going? And why right before the play? Was he attempting to make some kind of dramatic statement by running away right then?

  And where did he go? There was nothing around Whiteridge but woods. And then more woods. That kind of wilderness was far too easy to become disoriented.

  In a landscape like that, Rosalie knew, a child could quickly become lost.

  She didn’t know her knees were giving out until they hit the ground with a hard smack. The force of the impact should have hurt, but if so she could not tell. Her heart was screaming. Her soul was screaming.

  And yet only a strangled noise left her throat.

  “Miss Flinn!” Anna cried.

  Someone opened the canvas behind Rosalie.

  “What’s happening?” Noah asked.

  Strong hands touched Rosalie’s shoulders and helped her to standing.

  “Rosalie?” Noah asked. “What’s going on? What’s wrong?”

  “He--he’s gone,” she stuttered.

  Noah’s face was already pale. “What are you talking about?”

  “Jacob left. He took a rucksack and left.”

  Noah’s brow crinkled. “When?”

  Rosalie looked to Anna.

  “Um, before the play,” the girl
nervously said.

  Rosalie pressed her palm to her mouth. “He doesn’t even know where he’s going. Where does he think he’s going?”