To Write a Wrong

by Jen Turano

  “You barely know her.”

  “Odd as this may sound, I feel as if I’ve known her for years, not simply a few weeks.”

  “I’m going to need my smelling salts.”

  He arched a brow. “You don’t look like you’re about to faint. In fact, your cheeks are flushed, and your eyes seem to be holding what almost appears to be temper.”

  Mildred withdrew her hand from his. “I don’t get in tempers when it comes to you.”

  “I’m fairly sure the expression on your face right now says differently.”

  She narrowed her eyes. “My face wouldn’t be saying anything at all if you would have only settled your affections on one of the many darling and, need I add, adventure-less young ladies I invited for you to our house party. Instead, you seem to have settled your affection on the one woman who seems to land herself in the midst of danger at the drop of a hat.”

  “It’s not as if she does so intentionally. However, since I’m not going to deny that I hold Daphne in a great deal of esteem, along with affection, you’re going to have to reconcile yourself with that. And if she returns my affections, you’re going to have to learn how to get along with her since she’ll become a part of both of our lives.”

  Mildred immediately snatched up the fan she always kept on her bedside table and began waving it furiously back and forth in front of her face. “I definitely need my smelling salts now. I feel an anxiety attack coming on.”

  Herman reached out and stopped the fan mid-wave, catching his grandmother’s eye. “You don’t need your smelling salts. You’re merely using an anxiety attack as a way to avoid a conversation that’s not to your liking.”

  “You’ve never questioned my anxiety attacks before,” Mildred said, tossing aside her fan.

  “I’ve never questioned your attacks before because I’ve always known you use your nerves as a way to ascertain I’ll stay out of harm’s way. Up until now, I’ve never taken issue with your tactics, but that’s because the circumstances you’ve taken issue with over the years are normally centered around activities you consider dangerous, such as traveling. Traveling is relatively inconsequential to my life. Daphne, on the other hand, is anything but inconsequential.”

  Mildred scooted to the edge of the bed, swung her legs over it, then got to her feet, moving to look out the window. “I didn’t realize you knew I’ve been using my nerves to manipulate you.”

  “I wouldn’t say you’ve manipulated me.” Herman smiled. “You’ve acted like the overly protective grandmother you are, and for good reason. Both of us suffered tremendously after the ship accident, and I’ve never begrudged you for wanting to keep me safe.”

  Mildred turned from the window, her eyes suspiciously bright. “You’re far too considerate for your own good, Herman. You should begrudge me because I’ve taken great pains to stifle the adventurous spirit I know you possess.”

  “You haven’t stifled my spirit,” Herman countered. “It’s not as if you locked me up in my room and threw away the key.” He moved to stand beside his grandmother. “You’ve never made a big fuss over most of the questionable activities I enjoy, such as boxing. If you’d truly wanted to stifle my spirit, you’d have put your foot down over those activities.”

  “I never made a fuss because you went to such lengths to assure me you’d put protective measures in place with all those activities, those lengths making it impossible for me to protest because I would have ended up looking completely unreasonable.” She gave a roll of her eyes. “You’ve tried to convince me boxing with Sheldon is perfectly safe because he’s smaller than you. I do have eyes, Herman. Sherman’s not been smaller than you in quite some time.”

  “Which proves without a doubt that you’ve not stifled me as much as you evidently believe you have. I do have to wonder why you never said anything, especially when you must know I would have discontinued some of my more questionable activities if I’d known you were aware of the danger they present me.”

  She released a sigh. “As I said, protesting would have made me look unreasonable. But, besides that, it wasn’t worth the risk of having you realize how much of a burden I can be to you at times, or worth the risk that you would become annoyed with me and decide to embrace your adventurous spirit instead of curtail it in order to spare my nervous condition.”

  “You’ve never been a burden to me.”

  “Of course I have, and I’ve been unfair to you by taking to my bed whenever I felt you were considering venturing farther into the world.”

  “It’s my choice to keep close to you, Grandmother, and I do so because you’re the most important person in the world to me. You’re the one who read books with me as we tried to manage our grief all those years ago, which allowed me to develop a love for reading, which then led to a love of writing, which then eventually led to my becoming a novelist. I never would have discovered the profession I love if not for you.”

  “But you might have discovered real adventures if I’d given you space to spread your wings.”

  “My wings are hardly fettered, and I don’t long to experience adventures like my parents did. As I told someone recently, I’m perfectly content to live those types of adventures vicariously through my books.” He took hold of her hand. “Yes, there are times I dream of taking a few trips here and there, but everyone dreams, Grandmother. You obviously believe that I’ve forgone trips because you forced me to stay close to you, but that’s not true. I choose to stay near you. I enjoy your company. I love you more than life itself, and if not for you, I don’t know how I would have survived losing my parents.”

  Mildred swiped away a tear that was trailing down her cheek. “I don’t know how I would have survived losing them, and William, without you either.” She blew out a breath. “Right after they died, I found myself questioning what I had done to deserve such a punishment from God, and truth be told, I was furious with God for taking them away. I felt as if He’d taken the light from my life and deprived you of parents who would never get to see you grow into a man. I began blaming myself for the accident, and I believe that blame is what led to the first of my anxiety attacks.”

  “Why would you have blamed yourself for a ship going down in a storm?”

  “I blamed myself for not stopping them from getting on that ship in the first place,” Mildred said. “Your grandfather was always a man with wanderlust, traveling about on his own when your father was young, and then taking Evan with him once your father was old enough to travel. He encouraged Evan to explore the world and encouraged him to embrace a life of adventure. I didn’t like it, but I never stepped in and asked either of them to temper those adventures.”

  She dashed another tear from her cheek. “I was hopeful when Evan married your mother that he would settle down, embrace a life of domesticity, but Sarah enjoyed adventures as well, a characteristic that drew Evan to her in the first place. Even when you came along, their taste for adventure didn’t abate. They frequently left you with me to travel the world, until finally, their travels resulted in death. I thought I should have done more, perhaps used guilt to persuade them to stay close to you, to raise you as parents are supposed to do. I became incredibly angry that your parents and William had been so careless with the lives God had given them, seeking out adventures instead of living normal lives. It was while I was so angry that I decided I was going to do everything in my power to suppress what I knew was an adventurous spirit in you, using your considerate nature as a way to keep you safe.”

  “I don’t possess the same adventurous spirit my parents did.”

  “Adventure is in your blood, my boy. That’s why you’re attracted to Daphne Beekman. She’s an adventure in and of itself.”

  Herman smiled. “She’s really not, Grandmother. As I’ve tried to explain to you numerous times, she was merely adopting the persona of a sophisticated woman of the world. She truly does keep smelling salts at the ready because she suffers from nerves as well.”

  “I find it dif
ficult to believe that an inquiry agent possesses a nervous constitution.”

  “One of the things I admire most about Daphne is the fact that she seems to want to overcome her nerves and has done so by placing herself in uncomfortable situations. If nothing else, you should also admire her for that.”

  “Or perhaps use her as an example to overcome my own nerves?”

  “I don’t think you need to use anyone as an example of how to do that, Grandmother. Your nerves didn’t come into play at all during the house party, even when you were presented with unexpected and difficult situations. If you ask me, that suggests you’re far stronger than you think.”

  Mildred began blinking rapidly, probably to keep the tears that were shining in her eyes at bay. “You are far too good to me, Herman. You should be angry with me and yet, here you are, being considerate and encouraging.” She patted his hand. “I told you I was furious with God for taking your parents away from me, but what I didn’t tell you was that my fury faded after I realized He’d left you to me. You’ve always been a great source of comfort, a light shining into my world even during my darkest days.” She drew in a ragged breath. “I think it’s past time, though, that you stop coddling me. Maybe I am stronger than I know, but I’ll never know that for certain if I don’t learn how to deal with the nuances and, yes, dangers of everyday life.”

  “Does that mean you’re ready to abandon your bed and return to the city, as well as abandon your preconceived notions about Daphne and give her a chance to show you who she really is?”

  “I suppose, because Daphne is apparently important to you, I can try my best to give her a chance. But if she stabs you again, all bets are off.”

  “I’ll make certain to keep all rapiers out of sight when I’m in her company.”

  “A prudent decision,” Mildred said before she sent him a rather sheepish smile. “I wasn’t actually keeping to my bed because of Daphne this time, though. That decision revolved more around Dr. Gibbons—or more around the idea that he’s disappeared on me.”

  Herman settled back in his chair. “Is this where you’re about to disclose that there’s something more between you and the good doctor besides a doctor-patient relationship?”

  “Of course there’s something between us. We’ve known each other for over twenty years.”

  “I may need to borrow your smelling salts before you expound on that.”

  Mildred stared at him for a long moment before she suddenly laughed, her laughter increasing so much that she had to pluck a handkerchief from her bedside table and dash it over eyes that were now watering.

  A full thirty seconds passed before she gave a last hiccup of amusement and grinned. “Good heavens, that something isn’t a romantic relationship, Herman. James is merely one of my best friends, but one who is being incredibly neglectful right now. He’s gone back to the city and hasn’t bothered to return to check on me, even though he must believe my nerves are suffering because of the attempts on your life. He’s never neglected my nerves before.”

  Herman returned the grin. “You have no idea how relieved that makes me.”

  “You’re relieved I’m being neglected by my best friend?”

  “I’m relieved you’re not romantically involved with Dr. Gibbons.”

  She waved that aside. “I’m sure it would be disconcerting to think about me, your grandmother, in a romantic relationship. However, just so you know, I’m only seventy, dear. There are many gentlemen out there who’ve made it known they’d be more than happy to spend time in my company. Maybe now if I’m not keeping such a close eye on you, I’ll have more opportunities to spend with them.”

  “I think this is where we return the conversation to Dr. Gibbons.”

  “Don’t be squeamish, dear. It doesn’t become you. As for Dr. Gibbons, I don’t know what else to say about that matter. I have no idea why he’s abandoned me.”

  “You did snap at him to stop coddling you.”

  “I didn’t think that would have him fleeing to the city, never to return.”

  “Have you considered that you might have hurt his feelings?”

  “I snap at him all the time. I would have thought he’d be used to it by now.”

  “I doubt you’ve ever told him to stop coddling you before. That was rather harsh.”

  Mildred released a sigh. “I suppose it was at that, which means I’m going to have to muster up a sincere apology, as well as beg his forgiveness.” She caught his eye. “Would you mind terribly if we would return to the city soon so that I can make amends? Good friends are difficult to come by, and I wouldn’t want to lose his friendship after all these years.”

  “Cooper has been champing at the bit to return to the city, so I won’t mind at all. But while we’re on the subject of Dr. Gibbons, you don’t think there’s an ulterior motive behind why he’s always coddled you so much, is there?”

  Mildred blinked before her lips twitched. “Do not say he’s on Daphne’s list of suspects.”

  “I’m afraid so.”

  “Oh, he’ll enjoy hearing that. But you can tell Daphne, when you see her next, that I can personally vouch for James. He coddles me because of his mother. She died when he was a young man, and he pursued a degree in medicine because he felt she died a needless death.” She leaned closer. “She suffered from nerves as well, you see, and became a victim of a questionable tonic that was given to her by a disreputable doctor.”

  “I’m sure Daphne will take him straight off the suspect list after learning that.”

  “I would think so, and with that settled, we should begin making preparations to return to the city so I can set matters right with my friend.”

  “I’m sure we’ll be able to manage those preparations within a few hours, but will you be all right if after I get you back to the city and settled, I travel on to Boston to check on Daphne? I’ll have Cooper call for a Pinkerton to watch over you until whoever is out to harm me is caught, even though no one seems to have you in their sights.”

  “I’ll be fine. I’m not sure I’d enjoy having a Pinkerton trailing around after me.”

  “But you’ll agree to that or else I won’t feel comfortable leaving you.”

  “Of course I’ll agree to it because I can see you’re anxious to check on Daphne.”

  “I must admit that I am, because her secret would never have come to light if she’d not agreed to take on my case. I can’t help but think the summons from her publishing house isn’t going to bode well for her.”

  Mildred smiled. “And here’s where I feel compelled to point out that you do indeed possess an adventurous spirt, because racing after a woman is an adventure if there ever was one—and one I’m not going to deny you this time.”

  “And here’s where I point out to you that even if I do hie off on an adventure every now and again, and even if I learn Daphne might hold me in at least a smidgen of affection, I’ll always come back to you, and you know I’m always good for my word.”

  After exchanging smiles with his grandmother, and after Mildred shooed him out of her room, saying she needed to pack, Herman headed for the Gentlemen’s House, where he knew Cooper was going to be delighted to learn they were leaving the Hudson estate, even if leaving could possibly set him in the crosshairs of a would-be-murderer once again.

  CHAPTER

  Twenty

  “After going over all the notes you compiled on possible suspects, I’m confident with saying that the most likely of perpetrators has to be one of Herman’s author friends.”

  Daphne looked over her shoulder as Mary, her mother’s lady’s maid, wrestled another enormous bustle on her behind, smiling at the sight of Eunice sitting by the window, her veils shoved away from her face in a haphazard fashion.

  “You know you could abandon your veils while you’re in my old bedchamber, don’t you? It’s an unusually warm day, and it can’t be comfortable having all those layers covering your head.”

  Eunice waved that aside. “I’ve gr
own accustomed to the veils, and there’s no saying that those brothers of yours won’t show up at the house today to see you, now that your mother has gotten the word out that you’re home again.” Her forehead wrinkled. “I’m still not certain why she waited three days to inform your brothers about that, though.”

  “She wanted to spend some ‘quality time’ with me, which roughly translates into her wanting a few days to interrogate me over what she’s taken to calling my ‘unfortunate circumstances.’ My brothers can usually be counted on to take my side when Mother and I are at odds.” Daphne winced. “She is certainly at odds with me right now because of all those articles Charles sold to every newspaper outlet he could find.”

  “He does seem to have been diligent in getting his story spread.” Eunice took a second to write something in the notepad she’d commandeered from Daphne. “Seems to me his obvious animosity toward you and your success as an author makes him a lead suspect in Herman’s case because Herman is a successful author as well, whereas Charles’s sales are more questionable.” She tapped the pencil against the notepad. “But if we may return to your mother for a brief moment. I know you’re at odds with her, but from what I’ve observed, she seems genuinely concerned about your situation and is merely trying to convince you to move back to Boston because she wants to make certain no further harm is done to you or your reputation.”

  “I’m not that concerned about my reputation, given my advanced age of twenty-five. Besides, it’s not as if I actually did anything to tarnish it. Writing is not a tawdry occupation, nor is being an inquiry agent.”

  Eunice laid aside the notebook. “But those are both occupations that could discourage gentlemen from courting you, something your mother is definitely worried about.”

  “I’m fine not being courted by a gentleman, and I’m reconciled to the idea that I’ll probably end up a spinster.”

  Eunice rose to her feet and nodded to the lady’s maid. “Would you mind excusing us for a moment, Mary?”