Hard As It Gets: A Hard Ink Novel

by Laura Kaye

  Rixey shook his head and hoped the distraction had worked. Even if only a little. “Nothing. Eat up.”

  They’d just finished their seconds and carried their dirties to the sink when Jeremy walked in. “Dude. You made sloppy joes and didn’t tell me? You better’ve saved me some.” He stepped up to the stove and peered into the pan. “Aw, yeah.”

  Becca chuckled.

  Jeremy’s gaze cut to her and froze, then he looked at Rixey. Shit, Nick recognized that glint in his brother’s eyes. Jer was about to be a pain in the ass. Since Nick had returned to the real world, he hadn’t once brought a woman here, let alone cooked for her. No doubt his dipshit brother was reading all kinds of significance into that.

  “So, Becca, did you enjoy the sloppy joes Nick made for you?”

  “Yeah,” she said, leaning against the counter. “They were great.” She didn’t seem to hear the innuendo dripping from the guy’s words.

  But Rixey did. And he knew his smart-ass brother enough to know he was like a dog with a bone. Wouldn’t stop until they were squirming. Which would undo the relaxed rapport he’d finally managed to achieve with Becca. “Jeremy,” he said, lacing the syllables with a warning his brother sure as hell would recognize.

  Grinning, Jeremy started in. “Wow, that was really nice of Nick to—”

  Rixey swiped the pan out from under Jeremy’s nose and crossed to the trash can. His foot depressed the pedal and the metal lid flipped up.

  “Hey!” Jeremy whirled, following Nick’s quick movements.

  Nick tilted the skillet at a forty-five-degree angle and paused, ready to scoop the leftovers into the trash. “You were saying?”

  Jeremy gasped and threw his hands out. “What the hell are you doing, man? You can’t . . . that’s sloppy joe!” Mouth agape, eyes wide, his expression was almost comical.

  Becca glanced between them, a confused smile on her face.

  Nick winked at her, then arched a brow at Jeremy. Boy damn well knew what this was for.

  Jer rolled his eyes. “All right, all right. Just”—he gestured to the stove—“step away from the trash. Slowly.”

  Settling the pan back on the burner, Nick glared, then finally let go of the handle. Jeremy pulled it close and shielded it with his body like it was his firstborn child. Rixey snickered.

  “If I hadn’t known you two were brothers before this moment, I would know now.” Becca grinned.

  Building his sandwich, Jeremy glared out from under his long hair. “Why? Because he’s such an asshole?”

  She laughed, but then her smile turned sad. “No, because just then you reminded me of my brothers.”

  “You have more than one?” Rixey asked, not remembering Frank ever mentioning a third kid. Rixey had known her father for five years, though Frank had never been the most verbose when it came to his personal life. Wasn’t unusual. A lot of guys compartmentalized their real-world lives while they were in the field. Thinking about everything and everyone you were missing back home was exactly the kind of distraction that got you injured or killed.

  “I did. My older brother, Scott, died eight years ago this summer. He was twenty-one. Heroin overdose.” She blinked up at him. “Anyway, Scott and Charlie were in a perpetual competition to annoy one another. I just tried to keep out of the way.” She lifted one shoulder in a small shrug, a faraway look in her eyes.

  “I’m sorry to hear that, Becca.” Damn if the sadness in her voice didn’t cut right into him.

  “Thanks,” she said.

  Jeremy slid around to the bar and pushed onto a stool. He bit into his sloppy joe with a loud moan. When Becca chuckled, Rixey found himself glad his brother was there. Losing his parents had been horrific enough. He sure as hell couldn’t imagine losing his kid brother.

  Pain in the ass or not, Jeremy was a good guy through and through. Would do anything for a person, and often did. Which meant Nick had been remiss in not explaining Becca’s presence. “So, Jer, I should’ve mentioned it earlier, but Becca’s here because someone broke into her house today.”

  Jeremy’s gaze cut to hers, his eyes scanning over her face and landing on the scratch. He frowned. “Shit, seriously? I’m sorry. That sucks. Does this have something to do with your brother?”

  Becca sank onto the stool next to him, as if Jeremy’s outrage on her behalf put her at ease. And it probably did. Jer had that way about him. “I don’t know. But we’re going to find out.” Her blue eyes cut to Nick, filled with equal parts determination and question.

  Rixey nodded. He’d do everything he could to keep the darkness from closing in over her.

  Her expression brightened, and some of the stress seemed to bleed out of her shoulders. She cast a sideways glance at Jeremy. “Can I have a bite?” He jerked his sandwich to the side, away from her, and she gave a soft laugh. “Just kidding.”

  He mock-scowled at her, then smiled when she bumped her shoulder into his.

  “So, you like sloppy joes, bacon, and walking around naked. What else do I need to know about you?” Becca asked.

  Jeremy frowned. “Bacon?”

  She pointed. “Your shirt.”

  He looked down at himself and chuckled. “Oooh. Right.” Damn boy and his funny-ass T-shirts. This one read, “This Guy Loves BACON” with two hands pointing their thumbs back at himself. After that, they fell into an easy conversation.

  As Rixey watched the two of them together, resolve threaded through his very bones. Becca had lost one brother to tragedy. No one should have to go through that once, let alone twice—even if she was related to the man who’d ruined so much for him. But she wasn’t responsible for the sins of her old man. So he was going to do everything he could to make sure it didn’t happen again.

  Chapter 7

  Becca couldn’t sleep. Despite being more exhausted than she’d maybe ever been in her life, she’d tossed and turned for hours. She couldn’t get her mind to stop racing from one question to the next. Where is Charlie? Is he okay? Could he have run, or was he taken? Who ransacked his apartment? Who broke into my house? How are we going to figure all this out?

  We. As in, her and Nick.

  God, the man kept her on edge. One minute polite and helpful, the next cold and moody. As if her head wasn’t spinning enough from the mystery of Charlie’s disappearance.

  Sighing, she turned on her side. She’d wanted Nick’s help—no, more than that, she needed it. Still, she couldn’t help but feel like she was getting in way over her head.

  The image of the soldiers inked on his right bicep came into her mind’s eye, their silhouettes dark and still. Six soldiers. Why six? Seven men on her father’s team had been killed in that enemy ambush. Maybe it wasn’t the memorial she’d first thought? Or maybe it was just symbolic of those who’d gone before him? The thought touched her heart. That day, she’d lost her father, but Nick had lost a whole family of people who no doubt meant the world to him. In that moment, sitting at the bar eating the meal he’d made for them, she’d realized they were connected in the grief born from the events of that day, and it had made her feel they weren’t strangers after all.

  Except, really, what did she know about Nick? Ex-Special Forces. Had been with her father when he died—which made her eyes sting if she thought on it too much. Lived with his brother. Did occasional tattoos. Made kick-ass sloppy joes. Had a dimple on his left cheek and at least one tattoo. Helped her when he didn’t have to.

  Actually, she supposed she knew more than a little.

  And, geez, she’d come at him with a butcher knife.

  He’d disarmed her in a flash of movement and muscle. In her terror, she hadn’t fully registered that moment, but her mind went back to it now. Replayed it. Resurrected the feel of his tense, hard body trapping hers against the counter, his masculine heat and the soft caress of his breath washing over her.

  And now that hard body lay sleeping just down the hall.

  A flush ran over her skin, and Becca tossed back the covers.


  Sitting up, she reached for the lamp and squinted against the light when she turned it on. Lying there was no use. Her brain felt like that of a kid who’d consumed too much sugar, bouncing from one thing to the next, and her body was wired to the point of being jittery. There wasn’t much she could be doing for Charlie in the middle of the night, but that didn’t stop the urge from flooding through her.

  Out of bed, she slipped on some sleep shorts under her old tee and stepped to the door. It opened with a click that revealed nothing but quiet darkness on the other side.

  Keeping one hand on the wall to guide herself, she made her way to the big open kitchen and living room. At a panel of switches she’d noticed earlier, she tried each one until she turned on the cool, industrial fixture over the breakfast bar. It threw a wedge of gold on each side, casting illumination over both the kitchen and the closest edge of the living room.

  She opened the fridge and surveyed the shelves and drawers. After all, the last thing Nick had said to her before they’d gone their separate ways at bedtime was “Make yourself at home. What’s mine is yours.” Which had left her mind churning on exactly what the full practical application of that principle might include . . . But, at the very least, she assumed it included midnight raids on his fridge. One of her worst and most favorite habits.

  But the contents primarily fell into one of four categories: beer, other drinks, restaurant takeout and general leftovers, and meat.

  Wrinkling her nose, she closed the lower door and opened the upper one. Icy air blasted out as her gaze landed on a two-deep stack of ice cream tubs, the double chocolate fudge brownie catching her eye in particular. “That’s more like it.”

  She pushed the door shut and turned to the counter. And screamed.

  Nick was standing like a silent phantom at the edge of the dim light. The half-gallon container flipped out of her hands and did a triple somersault in the air before she dove for it at the same time Nick did.

  They crashed and she shrieked, her hands flush against a mountain of bare, hard flesh, and the tub of ice cream fell at their feet. His arms came around her, his greater weight nearly knocking her over and making them stumble until he’d all but pinned her against the counter.

  Time froze for an instant, then Becca burst out laughing, the ridiculousness of the past ten seconds growing in hilarity the more she thought about what had just happened. She covered her mouth with one hand as her head fell back and her laughter devolved into a series of choked chortles she couldn’t control. She gasped for breath, her forehead falling against Nick’s chest.

  His chest. Holy crap, the man was half naked and she was touching him. Her hand. Her face. Her stomach against his. The details of their position finally registered in her sleep-deprived brain.

  He was all over her.

  She lifted her gaze over the hard planes of his chest, getting snagged for a long moment on the swirling tribal pattern of black ink that ran over the bulge of his shoulder and down his arm. Finally she met the light green of his eyes. Nick stared down at her, one eyebrow arched, one corner of his mouth lifting enough to bring his dimple out to play.

  “Hi,” she whispered, the release of the laughing fit making her shoulders lighter, less tense.

  “Hi,” he said. He didn’t move away or drop his arms from caging her against the counter.

  Heat bloomed over her skin. Becca released a shaky breath, one that emphasized just how close they were. Her hands, lying flat on the pads of his pecs, itched to move and explore. And her tongue volunteered to follow close behind.

  What was it about this guy that made her brain shut off and her body turn on? Way on. Her nipples went tight, liquid heat gathered low in her belly, and her hips were a breath away from grinding against his. Wanting this man—and acting on that desire in any way—was a really bad idea. All her energy needed to be focused on finding Charlie. But when she was around Nick, need vibrated through her veins and lust became a living thing inside her. And, oh, how she wanted to let herself go.

  As if he’d picked up on the shift in her mood, Nick’s gaze went molten and he leaned in, just the smallest bit, his line of sight zeroing in on her lips. Oh, God, he’s going to kiss me. She swallowed hard, her mouth going dry.

  “Hey, is everything okay—oh. Oh, shit. Sorry. Carry on.” Jeremy’s voice retreated as quickly as it had appeared. Down the hall, his door clicked shut.

  Nick wrenched back, leaving Becca frozen and breathless and hungry against the granite. As much as part of her absolutely loathed the distance between them, his position several feet away allowed her to soak in the whole of him. The broad, muscled shoulders, the cut definition of his chest and abdomen, the way his unbuttoned jeans hung on his lean hips. Unbuttoned. Like he’d just pulled them on. And, with how low they sat, no way he was wearing anything underneath. Even his bare feet, sticking out beneath the ragged hem of the denim, were sexy.

  “Becca, what are you doing?”

  Busted. Her gaze whipped up to his. The heat absolutely blazing in his eyes did nothing to help pull herself together. She bent down and retrieved the fumbled ice cream. What she really needed was a cold shower. With a handheld showerhead. And really good water pressure. The thought was so not helpful.

  “Midnight snack,” she said as she placed the tub on the counter’s edge, hoping he believed the rasp in her voice was left over from sleep. “Want some?”

  He remained silent until she looked at him. “Maybe I do.”

  The words hung in the air between them, seeming to answer a question she hadn’t asked. Or maybe she had. If they were playing chicken, she definitely lost, because she was the first one to turn away.

  A moment later, he stepped to the counter, then leaned onto his elbows next to her. The position bunched his biceps, pulling her attention to another piece of ink he wore there. Toward his shoulder, above the band of fallen soldiers, a silver knife lay atop a pair of crossed arrows. The inner part of the Special Forces crest, readily familiar to her from her father’s service—except this was different. A black circle surrounded the weapons like a shroud.

  “Trouble sleeping?” he finally said.

  She dragged her finger through a bit of condensation on the ice cream’s lid. “Yeah. I’m wired. Too much nervous energy. Didn’t mean to wake you, though.”

  He shook his head. “Wasn’t asleep.”

  “Oh.” She wondered why, but since he hadn’t offered, she didn’t want to push. She blew out a long breath, trying to get her body to settle down. His proximity wasn’t helping. Heat poured off his arm into hers.

  “I might have a better way to blow off some steam.”

  Her heart tripped in her chest. His expression was serious, challenging. “Better than chocolate ice cream?”

  “Yep. You game?”

  She pushed the container of ice cream away. “Depends on exactly what it is you’re proposing.” Her mind reeled with the possibilities. Anticipation spread a shiver over her skin.

  The smile he unleashed was a complete killer, part smirk, part smolder. Twin urges coursed through her—to smack it off him or kiss it off him. Just then, both urges ran neck and neck.

  Rixey grabbed the double chocolate fudge brownie and chucked it in the freezer. “I’ll show you.” He made for the front door.

  Becca frowned. “Uh, where are you going?”

  “Come find out.”

  Gesturing to herself, she stepped around the counter. “I’m not exactly dressed for a middle-of-the-night stroll.”

  His gaze dragged over her, and she felt it like a physical caress. “You’re fine. Except, um—” He cleared his throat. “You might want to put on a bra.”

  Put on a bra? Hands on her hips, she watched him attempt to keep a straight face, then she turned on her heel. “Not what I expected you to say.”

  “What’s that?” he called.

  “Nothing,” she muttered. Put on a bra. Hmph. Apparently their ideas about good ways to blow off steam differed. Clearly, she wa
s way more affected by him than he was by her. And just as well. In her room, she slipped a bra on under her sleep shirt. Shouldn’t even be thinking of anything else while Charlie was missing. No matter that Nick made her feel more like a woman than any other man ever had. Selfish much, Bec? Guilt settled over her like a lead blanket.

  From the moment she returned to the hall, Nick’s gaze was on her. Leaning against the front door, he watched her walk the straight line to him. And, damn, even though she was trying like hell to ignore it, he was sex on a freaking stick, his folded arms emphasizing the inked and stacked muscles of his biceps and shoulders, and leaving bare the trail of dark hair that disappeared into his now-buttoned jeans.

  “All right, lay it on me. What kind of big surprise requires a bra at two o’clock in the morning?”

  “This way,” he said, holding the door for her. He followed her out and gestured to the door opposite their apartment, where he entered a code into another electrical panel.

  “What’s with all the keypads?” she asked.

  “Secure. Easily changeable. Not easily picked.” A metallic click sounded and he stepped inside, into the yawning darkness. He reached to the wall, flipped some switches, and light illuminated a mostly unfinished, cavernous space. One they used as a gym, judging by the machines, free weights, and other equipment within.

  But Becca couldn’t focus on the details of the huge space. Because all she could see was the magnificent expanse of Nick’s bare back.

  Running almost the whole length of his spine, a dragon wrapped itself around a deadly black sword, hilt just below his neck, point at his lower back, ending near a mass of scars that traveled outward toward his hip and disappeared below the waistband of his jeans. The dragon’s wings spanned his shoulder blades, and the movement of his muscles made it appear alive, actually struggling to hold its perch on the steel. The red of the beast’s eyes looked out from the image, holding her gaze.