Nothing to Lose

by Clare Lydon

  “You’re sure?”

  Joy smiled. “Never been surer of anything in my life, and you can thank Steve for that. Steve and this wise old bird.” Joy placed a kiss on Clementine’s cheek.

  “Steve? I was thinking about slapping him when I saw you in his arms last night.”

  Clementine turned to Joy, alarmed.

  Joy shook her head. “That was nothing — that was just two friends hugging. He’s splitting up with Sharon because he’s not sure about her. And he asked me if I was sure about you — and that’s when I realised I’ve never been surer about anything in my life.”

  Scarlet glanced from a teary Joy to a beaming Clementine, then back to Joy.

  Joy had changed her mind. Joy wanted to come to the wedding with her, as her girlfriend. Scarlet couldn’t help the grin that broke out on her face. Then she glanced at her watch one more time.

  “Well, if you’ve never been surer of anything in your life, I can hardly say no, can I? Only, it’s 12.15 and you’re not even dressed yet, so we better get a move on if we’re getting you home, changed, and then to the town hall in time for the wedding.”

  Joy stepped forward and took Scarlet’s hand in hers, then planted a gentle kiss on her lips.

  For Scarlet, it was a kiss of reconnection. A kiss with a promise of far more to come, coupled with a rush of relief. She hadn’t wanted to face life without Joy, didn’t even want to consider it — and now she didn’t have to.

  Now, Joy was back in her arms, where she belonged.

  “Thank you for giving me another chance,” Joy said, her eyes searching Scarlet’s.

  “How could I not?” Scarlet replied, her lips burning onto Joy’s again.

  “And you look absolutely ravishing,” Joy whispered in her ear.

  “Don’t make me cry again,” Scarlet replied, holding Joy as close as she possibly could.

  Scarlet never wanted to let go, ever.

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  Scarlet would never put herself down as the romantic type, but after everything that had happened this week, her emotions were like a leaky tap, overtaking her at every turn. Seeing Steph walk in resplendent in her delicate white dress and Eamonn all dapper in his blue suit, she wasn’t embarrassed to admit she’d shed a tear, and even glanced at Joy, wondering if she was also entertaining the idea this might be them one day.

  Scarlet didn’t want to ask — seeing as they’d only just reconciled, it seemed a little forward to be talking about marriage. But this wedding couldn’t have been better timed for making her want to proclaim how she was feeling, too. Because since Thursday, and despite all the obstacles, Scarlet was as sure as she could be: she was falling for Joy, hook, line, and sinker. Which made it all the more glorious that Joy had decided to come back to her.

  And now they were back at Grasspoint, saying hi to Joy’s gran before heading into the reception. Clementine was chatting with her friend Carol when they approached, and when she saw them, her eyes lit up.

  “How are you two doing?”

  Scarlet grinned shyly at Joy. “So far, so good,” she replied.

  “My favourite granddaughter and Scarlet, the town hero — you make a lovely couple.” Clementine gave them both a hug. When she let Scarlet go, Clementine held her at arm’s length. “You were splendid on the news, you know — I forgot to say earlier. You brought a tear to my eye.” She turned to Joy. “And you,” she said. “I love you in a dress, even though they’re not your favourite things.”

  “I said the same,” Scarlet told Clementine, smiling at Joy. “She looks gorgeous, doesn’t she?” Joy’s dress was a flowery number and she’d paired it with some tan shoes, with matching handbag and jacket.

  Clementine eyed Scarlet, smiling. “She does indeed, as do you.” She paused. “And how was the ceremony?”

  “It went really well, Steph looked radiant,” Joy said. “You’re coming later, aren’t you?”

  Eamonn and Steph had invited a fair smattering of the home’s guests to the evening as a thank you.

  “Just try and stop us — we’ve been planning our outfits all week, haven’t we?”

  Carol nodded. “I don’t get to dress up in my finery that often anymore, and it’s not far to walk to get home either, is it?”

  Scarlet laughed. “Sounds perfect,” she said, taking Joy’s hand. But once she did, she froze: Joy had said she was fine with everything, but was she really? Scarlet had no idea and it was still such early days.

  However, as if reading her mind, Joy brought Scarlet’s hand up to her mouth and kissed it.

  Scarlet was so touched, she had to hold in a gasp. If she’d been in any doubt, she wasn’t now: Joy had meant it fully, just like she said.

  “So we’ll see you later — just thought we’d pop in to say hi before the meal,” Joy said.

  “See you at seven,” Clementine replied, taking Joy’s hand. “Have a love-filled afternoon,” she added, looking from Joy to Scarlet.

  They gave Clementine a hug goodbye, then hurried nextdoor, stopping en route for a brief kiss in the empty corridor that linked the venues. The weight of Joy in Scarlet’s arms was divine.

  “Was that okay, holding your hand?” Scarlet asked. She didn’t want to push Joy harder than she was ready for, despite what Joy had said.

  But Joy just nodded her head. “You can hold my hand all night if you like.” She paused. “Although that might be a little overkill.”

  Scarlet smiled, giving Joy a kiss. “I totally can if you want me to.”

  “You know, I never used to hold Steve’s hand much, if that makes any difference. I’m just not a hand-holder.” She paused, pulling back slightly. “Or perhaps it’s more, in the past, I wasn’t a hand-holder. But then again, I wasn’t much of a corridor-kisser, either, and look at me now, so who knows?” Joy kissed her again. “The fact that every time you hold my hand, I go weak at the knees makes the deal sweeter.”

  “I make you weak at the knees?” A 100-watt grin split Scarlet’s face. Knee-weakening at such an early stage of a relationship was a good sign. A very good sign.

  “Apparently, you do.”

  “Glad to hear it,” Scarlet said, easing Joy backwards. “And I know we talked a little back at the house, but are we okay? You sure this is all good with you?”

  Joy took a deep breath and nodded firmly. “You know what, we’re better than okay: we’re amazing. Nothing felt right yesterday with you gone, nothing’s felt right at any moment when I haven’t been with you. This past week has been a blur, but it’s righted my life. You right my life, you make it make sense.” Joy exhaled. “I’m just so glad you wanted me back after me being so stupid.”

  Scarlet shook her head. “I didn’t have a choice in the matter. My heart had already chosen you.” Scarlet was shocked those words had tripped out of her mouth, but she wasn’t scared by them, and the way Joy’s face softened, it looked like she wasn’t either. Scarlet was done pussy-footing around and she didn’t want any more misunderstandings when it came to her and Joy: she wanted to be clear, concise, and understood.

  “Is it too soon to be saying stuff like that?” Scarlet asked. She really hoped it wasn’t.

  Joy shook her head. “Nothing about us is too soon. We can’t come soon enough for me.”

  “I’ll hold you to that later,” Scarlet replied with a wink. “But no more soppy talk in this corridor because I don’t have waterproof mascara on. I think we should make an appearance at the wedding, seeing as that’s what we’re here for. Ready to drink free bubbles and eat sub-standard, mass-catered food?”

  Joy laughed. “When you put it like that...”

  ***

  The reception went off without a hitch, which was all anyone could ask for after the week the town had endured. The sun shone so the happy couple could have some photos taken in the grounds outside, and the dessert was the highlight of the meal: Joy never could resist profiteroles.

  Both Eamonn and Steph gave speeches, thanking everyone for rallying round
to save their day, including Celia for providing the hall for free, and Maureen Armitage for stepping in at the last minute to make the delicious Victoria Sponge wedding cake.

  And now the tables had been pushed back to turn the hall into a dancefloor, a local band were playing classic covers, and the home’s residents were pouring in, congratulating the couple of the moment.

  Scarlet and Joy were standing by the bar, chatting to Scarlet’s other football buddy Matt and his wife Viv. And after all her hesitation, Joy was going with her heart: she and Scarlet were now officially out, standing hand in hand.

  “So is this new, or have you been holding out on us at the football?” Matt asked, pointing to their clasped hands.

  Heat crept onto Joy’s cheeks: yes, they were out, but it was still going to take some getting used to. However, far from feeling nervous, every sinew of Joy’s being finally relaxed: and after 38 years of clenching, that was both freeing and exhilarating. Despite what she’d thought, the world hadn’t stopped turning as people found out, and Joy wasn’t as fazed as she thought she might be. Rather, she was proud of being with Scarlet. Who wouldn’t be? She was drop-dead gorgeous.

  Scarlet nodded. “It’s new — it’s our debut as a couple today.”

  “Congratulations,” Matt said, holding up his glass. “It’s been quite a week. First, you get flooded, then you become the poster girl for flood optimism, and now you’ve bagged yourself the mayor as your girlfriend.”

  Scarlet laughed. “When you put it like that, I guess it has been a pretty good week.” She clinked her glass to Matt’s. “But the poster girl for flood optimism? I’m not sure I’m happy about that.”

  “Believe it, that’s exactly what you are. From hard-boiled pessimist to flood superstar, all in the blink of an eye. You might have to stop swearing so much at football now, seeing as you are a public figure and shagging the mayor.”

  Scarlet roared with laughter at that. “Shagging the mayor? I’m sure we can come up with a more elegant way of saying it, can’t we?”

  “It is what it is,” Joy replied, with a smile that butter couldn’t melt.

  Matt grinned. “Eamonn’s married, you’re loved up — now we just need Dulshaw to win the league and it’ll be the best year ever.”

  “They have to get somewhere to play first that isn’t waterlogged.”

  “Minor detail,” Matt replied.

  Their conversation was interrupted by Clementine and Robert walking up to them, Clementine eyeing Joy and Scarlet, a wide smile on her face.

  “Hello, lovely ladies,” she said, giving them both a kiss once more, beaming.

  “Hello, you,” Joy said, returning the greeting and also hugging Robert.

  “Have you had a good afternoon?” Clementine asked.

  “It was fabulous, wasn’t it?” Joy said, giving Scarlet a heated glance. And it had been. Just having Scarlet by her side and being with Scarlet had been the best reward of all.

  “Today’s been a day where love wins,” Matt added.

  “Love should always win,” Clementine replied with a shrug. “I’ve been on this earth long enough to know that it really is all you need.” She paused. “Well, that and money,” she added with a grin.

  “Love failed to win earlier when that wedding singer was belting out Up Where We Belong,” Scarlet said. “I almost died laughing she was so out of tune.”

  “Me, too,” Matt said, laughing all over again. “But you couldn’t say anything seeing as the singer was Eamonn’s aunt. So if anyone asks, it was grand. I just hope they didn’t catch me laughing on video.”

  Matt and Viv saw someone they knew, so excused themselves, which left Scarlet and Joy, Clementine and Robert.

  “Talking of love winning the day — I’ve also got news.” Clementine took Robert’s hand in hers and all of a sudden looked bashful. “Seeing as you’re announcing your relationship today, we’re going to announce ours. Robert and I are officially together.”

  Robert buffed up his chest and stroked his shiny head. “And I’m thrilled to have her,” he said.

  “You’re a sly fox,” Joy said, hugging Clementine. “And you’re a brave man,” she told Robert.

  “Oh, I know,” he replied. “But also a lucky one.”

  “And how do you think Michael will take all of this?” Clementine asked Joy. “Or Christopher, come to that?”

  Joy rolled her eyes when she thought about her brother and her dad. “I’m sure Michael will have loads to say, possibly along the lines of ‘Robert’s after your money’, and ‘have you really thought through this idea of being a lesbian, Joy’? But he can lump it — it’s our lives after all, isn’t it? As for dad, he won’t care, so long as it doesn’t interfere with his sun-splashed lifestyle.”

  “True enough. Anyway, I say carpe diem. Isn’t that right?” Clementine said to Robert.

  He gave her a nod. “Every day, Clem. Every day.”

  Clementine looked over at the band, a smile on her lips. “So lovely to have live music, too. I used to love going dancing and seeing bands when I was younger, and it’s something I really miss. You forget what you like to do after a while, once you get out of the habit.”

  Joy could definitely relate to that. She’d forgotten she liked to be wooed, be kissed, be loved liked she’d never been loved before. And she’d also forgotten the luxury and comfort of companionship — especially with the right person.

  “You’re so right,” Joy said. “Scarlet’s a terrific guitar player, she’s been giving me special concerts for one at home.”

  Clementine’s face perked up. “We used to have someone come over and play piano for us, but she had to stop. It was a real shame.” She paused. “Would you consider coming over and playing for us sometime, dear? I know the residents would love it. And you wouldn’t have to just play old songs — we like modern music, too.”

  Surprise crossed Scarlet’s face, but within seconds, she was nodding. “If you’d have asked me last week, I might have said no. But this week, having lost everything, I’m beginning to agree with your carpe diem statement. So, why not? I need to play more and you need entertaining. I’m sure we could marry the two needs up.”

  “Splendid!” Clementine said, squeezing Scarlet’s arm. “I’m liking you more and more every time I see you.”

  “The feeling’s mutual,” Scarlet replied.

  The band began to play a version of Andy Williams’ Can’t Take My Eyes Off Of You, and Clementine spun round to Robert, holding out a hand. “Now this is one of my favourites,” she said. “Shall we?”

  “We shall,” Robert said, leading her slowly onto the dancefloor.

  “And I’m expecting you two up here in a minute,” Clementine shouted over her shoulder.

  Joy laughed, before turning to Scarlet, rolling her eyes. “Sorry,” she said. “She can be a bit bossy when she wants to be.”

  Scarlet shook her head. “She’s great, I like her. I hope I can be just like her when I’m her age.”

  “I don’t know about the ‘just like her’ bit,” Joy said. “We can’t have both of us being quite that feisty, can we?”

  Joy followed up her comment with a laugh, but it stuck in her throat when she realised she’d just committed to her and Scarlet being together for the next 40 years. Were they even a couple yet? Joy had no idea; she hadn’t dated anyone in 15 years.

  She risked a glance at Scarlet, wondering what she was going to find. But all that was there was Scarlet smirking at Joy, a shocking grin on her face.

  “So you’re expecting us to be in this home together, or were you picturing us elsewhere?” Scarlet asked, putting a hand on Joy’s back.

  Want rippled through Joy’s body at her touch.

  “I don’t know. I wasn’t really looking that far ahead. It was just a figure of speech.” Joy doubted the make-up she’d applied so carefully was doing much to protect her flushed cheeks.

  Scarlet leaned in and kissed Joy lightly on the lips. “I don’t mind. It’s kind
of cute picturing us your gran’s age, still together. Makes me feel all warm inside. So long as we’re still having sex as hot as we did the other night.”

  Joy let out a bark of laughter. “Of course we will be, goes without saying.” Her gaze drifted onto the dancefloor. “But if you make one mention of my grandma having sex, I’ll slap you.”

  Scarlet laughed. “I promise I won’t say a word.” She held out her hand. “Now, may I have this dance?”

  Joy hesitated for a moment, but it was a brief one. This morning, she hadn’t been sure how it’d feel being out with Scarlet, being a couple for the whole world to see — but now she had her answer.

  It felt natural. It felt exactly right. It felt like all the moments leading up to this one had been slightly skewed, off-centre. But walking onto the dancefloor with Scarlet, and allowing herself to be held in her arms — Joy simply didn’t care what anyone thought.

  Joy was finally comfortable in her own skin; it was like she’d stopped running. Scarlet was her chequered flag, her gold medal. Dancing with Steve had never felt like this: he’d always trodden on her toes and made jokes in her ear. Kissing Steve had never felt like kissing Scarlet. And making love with Steve: well, there was no comparison.

  Standing in Scarlet’s arms, breathing in her scent, touching her soft shoulders, Joy was 100 per cent Joy, something she’d never been with a partner before.

  “Okay?” Scarlet asked, understandable concern lingering on her face.

  Joy nodded her head. “More than okay.” And she finally was: Joy saw it now more clearly than she ever had in her whole life. This is where she always should have been, and it’d taken Scarlet to show her. After the flood, Joy thought she’d rescued Scarlet by giving her somewhere to stay, but it was actually Scarlet who’d rescued her from a life stuck in a rut. A life unlived. In Scarlet’s arms, Joy was finally who she was meant to be.

  When Scarlet gazed into Joy’s eyes, before pressing her lips to hers, Joy worried the floor around her was shaking, such was the magnitude. The band faded out, the room went blurry, and Joy responded with gusto, clinging to Scarlet, kissing her as if she’d just been told she had moments left to live. If Scarlet was surprised, she didn’t show it. If anybody else was surprised, they said nothing.