Summer Shifter Days

by V. Vaughn

  “Can I—?” He shuffled his feet back and forth, looking nervous.

  “Can you what, Toby?” I would have crouched down beside him, but I couldn’t quite manage it anymore, and I was pretty sure if I tried, I wouldn’t be getting back up any time soon.

  “Feel the baby,” he finally blurted out, staring at the ground.

  “Of course you can!”

  His little hand reached out and gently smoothed over my stomach, a laugh escaping as the baby kicked at his hand. “He smells like me,” he murmured.

  Of course—he was a lion shifter, too. He had the gold tips to his hair, though his eyes were more of an aquamarine. My heart twisted a little at the reminder of Zane.

  Toby mumbled his thanks and scurried off down the corridor, most likely seeking the delicious smell of food that wafted from the cafeteria. I continued on my journey, following a little more slowly in Toby’s wake, my mind still picking at that night from months ago.

  When I had asked to see Zane, the girl at the front desk had informed me that he’d left strict instructions for me not to be allowed in. That he didn’t want anything to do with me— didn’t want to see me, didn’t want to talk to me. I was not welcome. I didn’t miss the flash of satisfaction in the girl’s eyes as she told me this, or the flash of dismay when she caught my scent. I had forced myself to write down my new number, knowing if I didn’t, my conscience would force me to return. Turned out I didn’t need to see him to let him know I was pregnant; my scent was like a calling card, advertising my status to the shifter world at large. His staff would tell him, and if he changed his mind, he’d know where to find me.

  That had been months ago.

  It had taken me about two weeks to face it—he had moved on.

  My appetite suddenly deserting me, I veered off course, heading outside. Maybe some fresh air would do me some good and pull me out of this funk. After all, I had a lot to be thankful for, and a lot look forward to. Light blinded me for a split second, the afternoon sun still bright in the sky. Shading my eyes, I stepped out onto the path that led to the courtyard, winding around the groomed flowerbeds and shrubs in a meandering path. Shrieks and giggles of children playing drifted on the warm summer breeze, catching my attention. The children would cheer me up. I followed the sound, taking the path around the corner.

  I rocked to a halt, unable to believe what my eyes were telling me. A large gaggle of kids crowded around a tall, well-built man, each squealing with excitement as he singled them out one by one, giving them hugs, ruffling hair and bumping fists with the older ones.

  Zane! Any hope that I had embellished my memories of him, making him even more handsome, even more attractive, fizzled into nothing as I stared at him. Broad through the shoulders and trim through the waist, he was made up of long, lean muscles. Raw, sexy, and hot. My pulse thundered in my ears, my palms sweating as my body screamed at me to move closer, to wrap myself around him.

  He crouched down next to one of the younger children, lifting them up onto his shoulders in a smooth swoop. He looked happy. Relaxed, like he didn’t have a care in the world.

  Why was he here? What was he doing? A thousand questions piled in on me, screaming for an answer. Why was he happy, when I hurt? The ground lurched beneath me, my vision blurring, everything going numb. I’d been fooling myself thinking that he didn’t mean anything, telling myself that it was okay. That it was okay if he didn’t want me—that I could raise his baby on my own. That I was better off without a man in my life. That I didn’t need another Archie telling me what I could and couldn’t do, telling me I was an idiot, that I was worthless. That I couldn’t even do the one thing I had been made for.

  Sucking in a deep breath, I grabbed at the wall. My hand stroked over my belly. It was real, I reassured myself. I had proved him wrong, and the look on Archie’s face when I had told him had been priceless.

  The baby kicked inside of me, as though sensing his father was near. It was as if my soul screamed for Zane, calling out across the courtyard, telling me to go to him. I couldn’t tear my eyes away, couldn’t stop myself from drinking in every detail. Thank God he hadn’t seen me, I still had chance to—

  Black crept in, blocking out the sun, the ground rushed toward me.

  9

  Zane

  Seeing the kids always cheered me up. There was something about the way they threw themselves into everything with joyful enthusiasm, no inhibitions or awkwardness, just plain ear-wrenching fun. I should have come sooner. I’d meant to, but the weeks had passed, turning into months, and then I’d been deep in the hole, unable to find a way back out.

  Gretchen had begged me to go back to the house, to seek Lara out and just ask her what she wanted. But I hadn’t, it wasn’t my right—screw it, it wasn’t my choice to make. If we were meant to be together, then we would be together. If she wanted me, she would find me. I wasn’t going anywhere.

  I did return once, though I didn’t tell anyone. Even before I had set off, I’d hated myself. But I’d needed to see her, to catch a glimpse of her big brown eyes, or perhaps hear her laugh. It sickened me, how weak I was, but it was the only way to keep my lion from driving me insane. As it was, he already scratched and clawed at me, refusing to give up hope no matter how many times I told him it was out of our hands.

  The husband had spotted me. He had marched over and informed me that Lara was pregnant, and that she sent a message. Leave me alone.

  The nail in the coffin. She was having another man’s baby.

  After that… I hadn’t gone back, instead spending weeks—months—searching the bottom of a bottle, snapping and snarling at anyone who dared to get too close.

  It been Sarah’s phone call that had pulled me out of the pit of misery, reminding me that I hadn’t visited in ages. That I had a duty of care to these kids, that they needed me.

  So, here I was.

  “Zane!”

  I turned my head to see Sarah strolling across the grass toward me, her smile one of welcome. “It’s great to see you.” She squinted at me, her smile flickering. “Though, to be honest, you don’t look that great.”

  “I’m fine,” I said, fighting back a snarl. Knowing she wasn’t likely to let it go—Sarah was too good a friend to let that happen—I tried to head her off. “So, how’s it going here? Are the kids making good progress? How many new ones have you taken in?”

  She laughed, punching me lightly on the arm. “Why all the questions? Don’t feel like talking, do you?”

  I shrugged. Hopefully she knew me well enough to know not to keep digging.

  Surprisingly, she dropped it, shaking her head then proceeding to answer my questions. “Everything is great, actually. We’ve got six new kids and a new staff member. A teacher. She specializes in disadvantaged kids, so we’re really lucky to have her here.”

  “Really?” I tried to inject appropriate enthusiasm into my question, but I wasn’t really listening, my mind elsewhere. That had been a big problem recently, my mind drifting, spiraling off into thought. Dammit, I wasn’t even coping at work, and the sympathetic looks grated on me.

  It was as if they’d never seen a man partially mated before. Yeah, I was pretty sure they hadn’t. I knew I hadn’t before. Until me.

  I tuned back in to what Sarah was saying, still only half listening.

  “…She’s really nice. I think you need to meet her.”

  “Uh huh,” I said noncommittally. Whatever. It didn’t really matter.

  “No. I think you really need to meet her, Zane!”

  Her insistent tone finally caught my attention. Crouching down, I lifted one of the younger kids up onto my shoulders in a squeal of laughter. I wanted to frown, but kept the smile on my face for the kids’ benefit. “Why, what’s wrong?”

  Her mouth twisted, an indication that she was clearly fighting an internal battle. “First, let me tell you, I wasn’t one-hundred percent sure, otherwise I would’ve called you. You’ve got to believe that, but now…” Her voice
trailed off, guilt coloring her face red.

  “Just spit it out, Sarah,” I grunted, setting the kid back on the ground.

  A muffled thud reached my ears, the sound indistinct and coming from the other side of the courtyard. I froze. A light breeze carried a multitude of scents and smells, but underneath that, was that—?

  “Her name’s Lara.”

  Sarah’s words echoed in my ears. The soft thud, the scent—it was her. She was here!

  Urgency tore through me. I strode across the courtyard, distantly aware that Sarah and the children followed behind me. I sped up into a jog, unease threading through me. The thud, the quiet gasp that hadn’t even registered until right now.

  Rounding the corner, I ground to a halt. Sprawled before me on the ground was Lara, her belly big and round, swollen with child. Her face was pale, her chest rising and falling in ragged breaths. Her eyes were closed, head lolling to the side.

  “Oh my God, Lara!” Sarah screamed, running toward her while quickly giving instructions to one of the older children to run and fetch help. “Zane! Snap out of it! Can you carry her inside?” She motioned me over, her face etched with worry.

  I was frozen, unable to move. That was my true mate lying there. But she wasn’t mine; I wasn’t allowed to claim her. If I touched her, how could I let her go again? And she didn’t want me, her stomach making that fact very clear. “I—I can’t.”

  “What do you mean, you can’t?” Sarah snapped out.

  “She—” I gestured at her swollen stomach, hoping that Sarah would interpret what I couldn’t seem to find the words to say.

  “What’s wrong with you? Even if she isn’t your mate—”

  “She is.” My voice sounded hollow, even to my ears.

  She snarled at me, temper lighting her eyes. “What is your problem then? Come and help your mate—and your baby!”

  At her words, I stiffened. “My baby? It’s not my baby; it’s her husband’s.” Couldn’t she tell it was taking everything I had not to scoop Lara up and take her away? That if I did, it would be for good. Forever.

  “For God’s sake, Zane. Use your nose. This is your child growing inside of her! She’s not married, and from what I’ve managed to piece together, she’s just escaped a nasty divorce.”

  At that moment, I realized I hadn’t been breathing, my control teetering on a knife’s edge.

  Hope soared inside of me, along with the devastating knowledge that if everything she was saying was true, I had let my mate go through this pregnancy alone.

  I sucked in a deep breath, bracing myself.

  It was true! Lara’s scent filled my nose, along with a new one mingling and intertwining with hers—the scent of a lion—the scent of my cub.

  I was going to be a father.

  My lion roared inside of me.

  We would never be alone again.

  LARA

  The room was pitch black, the darkness swallowing me. No, that wasn’t right. My eyes were shut. I had to open them. I tried to blink, but nothing happened. I was being sucked back under.

  Low murmurs grew louder as I struggled, trying to make my way back to consciousness. What had happened? I remembered everything going dark and the ground hurtling toward me…then nothing.

  Zane! He was here! Determination to find out why spurred me on. I focused on the voices, using them as an anchor.

  A door clicked shut, and the room fell silent.

  No! I needed the voices. Needed them to help me open my eyes. But everything was silent.

  “Lara?” a deep voice called to me, and I felt a whisper of skin feather over my cheek. “Lara, you’ve got to wake up,” the voice said urgently. “I can’t stand this—I have so many questions. Just please wake up.”

  “I’m awake,” I whispered, my throat dry and scratchy. Gritting my teeth, I finally managed to peel my eyelids open. Bright green eyes met mine, though they were cloudy with worry and…something else? What?

  My breath hitched as my heart thundered in my chest. He was really here, which meant—now he knew.

  “Hey,” he whispered, suddenly looking uncomfortable. “You had us all scared. How are you feeling?” His eyes darted down my body, and I knew what he was looking at, his gaze riveted and unblinking.

  My baby! My hands flew to my stomach, cradling the bump. “Is he—?” If anything had happened to him, I wasn’t sure if I—

  “He’s fine. Tough little guy you’ve got in there.” He was staring at me, as if waiting for me to say something. Hunched over in the chair, he looked miserable, lines of fatigue etched around his eyes.

  The worry dissipated, replaced by confusion. Why was he here? Had he found out about the baby? Did he want to be a part of his life?

  “So, were you ever—” “Why are—” We both spoke at once.

  The corner of his lips twitched. “You go first.”

  “Why are you here?” If he said it was because of the baby, then that was good, right? It was what I had wanted. What a load of utter rubbish! Who was I trying to kid? My hand itched to touch him again, to have him hold me and tell me everything was going to be okay. To stroke me, and kiss me, and— Heat flooded me at the thought of what I really wanted, him buried deep inside of me, taking me on a slow ride of passion and tenderness.

  But what we had shared hadn’t been slow or tender; it had been a fast, hard fuck. And that was all. Just like all men, out for a good time. If I’d never gotten pregnant—if there wasn’t a baby involved—he wouldn’t be here right now. I had to remember that.

  “I…it’s kind of hard to explain.” He paused, suddenly looking a little cagey.

  My mind spun, jumping to a hundred conclusions. If he’d come here to see me, then he’d just say it. Which meant… “Are you here to see someone else?” It had to be a shifter; did he think he’d found his mate? “Sarah?” I forced my friend’s name out, already dying a little inside.

  “Not exactly,” he muttered, looking like he’d rather be anywhere but here.

  It was like a stab to my heart, his evasion confirming everything I had guessed. I tugged together the little pride I had left. Who knew, he might not even want to stick around for the baby, and then I wouldn’t have a front row seat when he found his mate. I could only hope. “I’m sorry, you’ll have to be a little more specific,” I stated, sarcasm dripping from my voice.

  He jerked back, a frown creasing his brow. “Hey! You’re the one who didn’t even tell me you were pregnant! If there’s anyone that should be pissed off, it’s me!”

  “No, just you wait a minute! I did tell you!”

  “What? No, I think I’d remember something important like that. Being told I’m about to be a father is not something—”

  I cut off his indignant reply with a slash of my hand. “I came to your club, and was told in no uncertain terms that you didn’t want to see me. Ever.” I folded my arms over my chest, daring him to call me a liar. If he thought just because I was pregnant that I would be a pushover, he had another thing coming. My hormones were driving me crazy, and he was about to find himself on the receiving end, no matter how fuckable and kissable he was. Concentrate, Lara!

  “Who said that?” His words were a low growl, his eyes glowing as they narrowed dangerously.

  He didn’t scare me with his glowy eyes and snarly lips. The way I was feeling, I could eat him for breakfast! In more ways than one… Biting back an inappropriate sigh, and totally blaming it on the hormones, I replied, “It was the girl at the front desk, you know which one, the same girl I left my phone number with. Not that you bothered using it.” Okay, that came out a little snarky.

  His voice was low and controlled when he replied. “I didn’t leave any message for you, and I certainly didn’t get passed your phone number.”

  I stiffened in shock at his words. Why would she—?

  Meanwhile, Zane looked like he wanted to murder someone, and I nearly felt sorry for that little blonde bitch. Nearly.

  His jaw tensed as he swall
owed, clearly fighting for control, reminding me I was sharing the same space as a man who could turn into a massive lion. He looked away, eventually forcing a smile, though it ended up being more teeth than lips. “I’m going to be having words with her. She’s going to…” He didn’t have to finish the sentence, I could read his intention in his eyes. Maybe I did feel a little sorry for the girl.

  I took a deep breath. I had to know where I stood in all this, what his intentions were. “So, at least that explains why you didn’t come find me when you knew about the baby.”

  “If I’d had your number, I would’ve called you that first night.”

  Swallowing a squeak at the intensity of his gaze, I murmured, “Would you have? Why?”

  He answered my question with one of his own, regarding me shrewdly. “Why did you run off that night, Lara? Why didn’t you wait for me to get back?”

  I floundered. How could I explain? “Because…I know you know nothing about me, but I had my reasons.”

  His mouth twisted in what looked like resignation. “Do those reasons happen to include your husband?”

  “My husband! How do you—?”

  “I went to see him. We had a very…enlightening conversation. He told me you were still his wife, and that the baby was his.”

  That sounded like something Archie would do; he had a twisted sense of morality, and the last thing he’d want would be for me to be happy. “And you believed him?”

  “What the hell was I supposed to believe? You ran off!”

  “And from what I knew, you never wanted to see me again. How do you think that made me feel? What about me? I don’t hear from you, so for all I know, this thing between us actually was a one-night stand, and the next thing I know, I’m pregnant! Even though I can’t get pregnant. The reason my husband cited for our divorce, humiliating me in the process, not that he cared. He only cared about his money and his cars and his women and his—”