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Christmas with Her Bodyguard

Page 18

by Charlotte Hawkes

For himself as much as for her.

  He owed them both that much.

  She deserved someone who could give her so much more than he could offer right now. But as that old, familiar, lost grit began to burn inside him again, Myles knew that he was ready to stand back up, to fight, to be the kind of man worthy of a woman like Raevenne Rawlstone.

  He had one more shot at living. He wasn’t going to mess this one up.

  * * *

  ‘So what did you talk about with your brigadier?’

  ‘Too many things to explain now. Old missions. Old buddies. Guys who are no longer here. It wouldn’t make sense to you if I told you now. It wouldn’t...mean anything to you. But, if you like, over time, I can tell you the stories. Even introduce you to some of the old guys.’

  A part of her wanted that, wanted to talk to people who knew another side of Myles. But then she thought of her brother, and how closely he guarded some of his stories. Things he knew that she could never fully understand if she hadn’t been out there with him.

  ‘That’s okay.’ She placed her hand on his chest instinctively. ‘That’s your past. Your memories. Keep them precious. I want your future.’

  ‘And you have it,’ he told her fiercely. ‘I can’t promise that the nightmares are over. Or that I won’t have lapses. But I know who I am now, with you, and I know that I can overcome them. I can’t control everything, not with the villagers or with Mikey. Or with you.’

  ‘Oh, I don’t know about that.’ She blushed naughtily, thinking of the nights together when his unique set of skills had controlled her body most efficiently.

  The difference was, she was beginning to learn that she had her own set of skills to control his body, too.

  ‘I’m here for you, though,’ she added seriously. ‘Whenever you want me. To talk to, to distract, or even just to hold.’

  ‘And I promise you, I’ll always come to you from now on. I’ll never push you away again.’

  ‘I like the sound of that,’ she murmured, pushing him down on the bed and moving to sit astride him. ‘Starting from now?’

  ‘From now.’ He dipped his head in agreement.

  ‘Prove it,’ she murmured, lowering her mouth to his.

  ‘Shh... Listen!’ He grinned suddenly.

  ‘Ten...nine...eight...seven...’

  ‘Myles?’ she blinked, mumbling against his hot, vaguely salty chest.

  ‘...six...five...four...’

  Abruptly, she sat up, finally hearing the muted chanting outside.

  ‘Three...’ she chorused quietly with him, her hands resting on his shoulders as she straddled him and felt him begin to grow hard already. ‘Two...one... Happy New Year!’

  ‘Happy New Year, Rae.’ He lifted up to claim her mouth, his hands gliding up and down her spine to cup her backside. ‘Maybe we should make those promises New Year’s resolutions?’

  ‘I don’t care what you call them,’ she moaned gently, ‘as long as you honour them.’

  ‘Oh, I will. Trust me.’

  And then he obliged, more than happy to begin showing her all the ways he intended to make good on his promises.

  For the rest of their lives.

  * * * * *

  If you enjoyed this story, check out these other great reads from Charlotte Hawkes

  The Surgeon’s One-Night Baby

  A Bride to Redeem Him

  Tempted by Dr. Off-Limits

  Encounter with a Commanding Officer

  All available now!

  Keep reading for an excerpt from Their Christmas to Remember by Amalie Berlin.

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  Their Christmas to Remember

  by Amalie Berlin

  CHAPTER ONE

  DR. ANGELICA CONLEY knocked once before pushing into the room of her very first patient at Sutcliffe Memorial Hospital almost a year after that first treatment in Emergency. A patient she’d been saddened to see readmitted earlier in the week.

  “Hi, Jenna.” She wasn’t Jenna’s doctor now, she’d just had the sad duty of discovering and diagnosing Jenna’s original nephroblastoma, which had recurred after six months of remission. Jenna was now under the care of a pediatric oncologist and the Scottish pediatric surgeon who unknowingly set Angel’s imagination on fire. At least she hoped he didn’t know but, considering the way women seemed to fall at his feet, he probably at least suspected. She was alive, after all. It was one of the only things she had in common with her colleagues. In almost every other way, she stood apart from them, an oddity who didn’t fit in to the Manhattan scene, and never could.

  She really should’ve known that from the start—she’d had three decades to write it into her DNA, but she’d still fallen for the fantasy that things could be different here, that who she was and where she’d come from wouldn’t matter. But within three days at her first New York job, her past had come back to bite her, which was how she’d ended up at Sutcliffe. Fortunate, probably, but still...

  Being human was the only thing she had in common with her colleagues and being subject to the emotions that came with it. Like humiliation. If the serial Scottish flirt hadn’t sorted out her pesky reaction to him yet, she just had to hang in there until January and she’d be far enough away it would no longer matter what he or the rest of her New York colleagues felt about the Kentucky bumpkin who’d taken the turnip truck to medical school. She’d never hear them laughing from eight hundred miles away.

  And in Atlanta, no one knew her or her history. Especially not old boyfriends she’d once been young and foolish enough to share with. Turned out New York really wasn’t that big if you shared the same profession.

  But this was about Jenna. Not about Angel’s own problems. Or the Scotsman.

  Although it was hard to fake a smile in the face of bad news, that didn’t mean Angel couldn’t try and put the twelve-year-old at ease, especially since she’d heard there was something more amiss today.

  Jenna lay in her hospital bed, swaddled in extra blankets, the dark, sunken shadow below her brown eyes an unfortunate and telling symptom of a wasting disease along with the natural exhaustion and fear that accompanied it.

  She didn’t bother turning her attention to Angel, who she usually called her favorite doctor. The lack of response and her dull stare at the television could mean anything; the trauma swirling around her was as much emotional exhaustion as physical.

  “I heard you’re not feeling well today.” Angel tried anyway, praying she had some leverage. It was only three days since surgery, and Jenna needed to eat to get better,
which had been the day’s report: Jenna’s refusing to eat.

  “No.” The one-word answer set her alarm bells to full volume. No matter what was going on, Jenna tended to maintain a generally happy outlook, regardless of her difficult diagnosis and obstacles. Today, there wasn’t even a hint of a smile on her face.

  This could take a while. And that was okay. Angel’s shift was over; she had time for however long her quick visit became. Her tiny, half-empty apartment wouldn’t miss her.

  The door to the bathroom was closed. Angel tilted her head to listen and look for light beneath, but there was nothing. “Your mom here today?”

  “No.” Another single word answer. Whatever was wrong, there would be no quick solve.

  Angel snagged a chair and slid it up to the bedside, indicating her intention to stay. “Did she have to work?”

  “No.”

  “Has she already left for the day?”

  “No...” This time the admission came with a little quiver to her lower lip.

  The weight and tightness blooming in Angel’s chest had her leaning forward, trying to keep alarm from entering her voice. Something must have happened. Nothing insignificant would keep Mrs. Lindsey away from her daughter’s bedside for even a day.

  She took a moment and studied the girl’s position in the bed. She’d considered it a hallmark of weakness and exhaustion, but since they’d started to speak, Jenna’s arms had crossed over her chest. She also avoided eye contact. The teariness wasn’t worry, she was angry. This was not the product of an emergency.

  Just narrowing the options away from fear to anger eased the alarm roiling through her. Angel sat back up, allowing a deep breath. Sometimes she was glad for the survival skills her earliest education had given her. She might’ve been born far from any kind of city, but she could read people well enough to catch the first whiff of danger and knew when to depart before situations escalated to the need to run. It also came in handy in normal conversation or treating kids who really didn’t want treatment.

  “Where is she?”

  “With Mattie.” Jenna looked as far from Angel as she could then, out of the windows to the flurries blowing around in the late November chill.

  Did that mean outside? “Where did they go?”

  “It’s his birthday,” Jenna murmured, then added, “and it’s on tree day this year.”

  The lighting of the Christmas tree at Rockefeller Center was happening today. Always the first Wednesday after Thanksgiving, which Angel had celebrated last week with the best turkey sandwich she’d ever tasted, purchased the night before from an authentic New York deli.

  “Is that what he wanted for his birthday?” Hard to believe—the kid was four. Would be easier to believe if he wanted to visit the tree at the local pizza arcade.

  “We always go. Every year.” Jenna’s voice wobbled.

  Every year. Except this year she didn’t get to go. This year, which had been a bad year. And this week had started with her losing one of her kidneys along with the tumor that had reached her spine with enough pressure to corrupt her balance and the ability to control her legs. Her second such surgery this year, and it promised another round of chemotherapy after Christmas. Her hair had only just gotten long enough to begin styling again.

  It was a lot for a child. It would’ve been a lot for an adult.

  “Next year you’ll get to go again.” Angel heard the words come out, knew it was wrong to say it—no one could promise this child she’d be alive next year—but the defeat she saw in the slope of Jenna’s frail shoulders and the pain in her voice had the words flying out of Angel’s mouth before that logical part of her brain kicked in. All there was in that second was the need to comfort, connecting with the part of her own soul that knew bitter disappointment and wished to soothe that hurt so hard that any heart could hear it.

  “No, I won’t.” The softly spoken words dropped like stones in the room. “No more holidays after this year. Maybe Valentine’s Day, not that any boy would want to be the Valentine of Baldy.”

  “Now you’re just talking crazy.” Angel snagged Jenna’s bony hand and squeezed, and, though she’d yet to get any eye contact from the girl, took it as a small sign of hope when she didn’t pull away. “You know tomorrow you’re going to feel a lot more like yourself. What can I do to make today better?”

  “Take me to the tree.”

  She’d been told No so much lately, but Angel had to say it again. “Sweet girl, you know I would do that if I could.”

  A chirp from the neglected laptop on Jenna’s bedside table interrupted Angel’s train of thought, then she remembered. “They’ll broadcast it tonight, the whole ceremony with the singers and the Rockettes. We could watch it together? I’ll go get us some dinner, and we’ll sit here and soak up Christmas spirit with whatever you want.”

  “It’s not the same,” Jenna grumbled. “They do those shots from far away. They don’t get up close and look way up at the top. One time, I even crawled below the barrier rails and almost got to the tree before they caught me.”

  The tree could be leverage to get her to eat.

  Sometimes she still thought like the criminals who’d raised her, and even if this was a con that was being used for good, that pang of self-disgust still stabbed cold into the back of her neck for the briefest of moments. Before she used that leverage anyway.

  “What if I took my phone to Rockefeller Center and went to the base of the tree, and live streamed it for you to watch, right from the thick of things? You could tell me what you wanted to see, and I’d go film that.”

  Jenna finally looked at her, and a little zing of triumph negated that lance of less positive feelings about herself.

  “You would?” Voice so hopeful, but her expression shouted worry this was just something else she couldn’t have. “Would you bring me a peppermint hot cocoa and a snickerdoodle from the cookie shop?”

  Got her.

  “I absolutely would do that for you. Would you do something for me if I did?”

  “What?”

  “Eat some lunch?” Angel phrased it like a question and pretended even to herself that she’d had no ulterior motive for visiting the little patient, that she’d have come and visited anyway because it was the kind thing to do. That was what good people did, and it was something she was working on. Might always be working on. “I’ll tell them to bring up something good. You eat it, and I’ll live stream the tree lighting and bring you goodies afterward.”

  Jenna looked for a moment as if she didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, but then smiled so wide Angel could ignore the regret she should feel for her terrible adulting skills. “I will!”

  She did better in her daily life and in her practice, but Jenna was special. And Angel knew a whole lot about disappointment and deprivation, which colored her actions. She might not be able to cure Jenna today, but she could make today better.

  Angel rounded the bed to fetch the laptop, and they took a moment to link to her social media account, then checked the schedule for the tree ceremony.

  “Lasses.” A deep, deliciously resonant voice came from the open door behind her, announcing the arrival of the brain-scrambling Scotsman.

  He did that on purpose, she was just sure of it—the man’s brogue got thicker when he wanted to pour on the charm, as he apparently now did.

  She was yet another weak creature who responded. Oh, she tried not to like it, and usually failed. Like right now, she failed completely to control her smile reflex. No matter how hard she willed softness and relaxation into her cheeks, they fired anyway. The best she could do was try to twist it into a rueful grimace as she made room for the surgeon.

  “Jenna, my love, I’m hearing rumors you’re no’ eatin’.” Dr. Wolfe McKeag hit the Rs in his speech so hard they seemed to keep on rolling even after he’d moved on to lavish his attention on other words.
Did he do that with his family? Dr. Lyons McKeag, his brother, worked in the ER with Angel, and he seemed to have become much more acclimatized to the sound of American vowels. And Rs.

  However Wolfe McKeag liked to live his life, it wasn’t her business. But how strange it must be to be so proud of where he came from that he’d play it up instead of hiding it completely. To not live in perpetual fear of being found out if anyone got close... She’d told one person and lost her first job. The possibility that he’d tell someone here and get her fired again always sat in the back of her mind.

  Angel couldn’t imagine life without that edge. Being so comfortable with herself, her past. Even a decade after removing herself entirely from the place and the people of her early life, all that came to mind when she actively tried not to think back was the lone pair of pants she’d had to wear one year.

  What kind of demented designer even made camouflage-patterned corduroy? Certainly not one who had ever worn camouflage in a practical sense. Not even the stealthiest hunter could sneak up on a deer if every step announced their arrival. Not that she’d been able to shoot the deer that time she’d tried to help her father hunt when the larder ran bare.

  And none of that had any bearing on her day, or the evening’s tasks ahead of her. McKeag could stay here and sweet-talk Jenna all he liked, but Angel had already solved the problem. She might not have had to if she’d waited—even a twelve-year-old couldn’t help but cave when McKeag came cooing.

  Shooting the kid a surreptitious smile, she made her way toward the door, greeting him in passing. “Dr. McKeag.”

  “Dr. Conley,” he returned, and she chanced a glance to find his pale blue eyes fixed on her. Just for a second. Just long enough to awaken the bitey critters in her belly. Some people had butterflies, Angel had things with teeth. And they roused so infrequently she’d have sworn they’d died off long ago, except for McKeag.

  “Dr. Wolfe, I’m going to eat. Dr. Angel is going to get me peppermint cocoa and snickerdoodles.”

  Kid made it sound as if that was the food she’d agreed to eat...

  “Dr. Angel?” he repeated.

 

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