WithHerCraving

by Lorie O'Clare

  She knew her sire’s breed had originated on that island, hence the name. Katrin knew little about the details that had led to packs agreeing her breed was too dangerous to live.

  “The past is the past. It isn’t what matters.” She sifted out the negative thoughts that had festered in her brain and promised herself they would never return. Having the gift was a privilege, and one that needed to be treated with great care and respect. “What matters is this day forward,” she whispered under her breath.

  Forcing her attention to her task, Katrin dipped her hand in the water in the cauldron. It was warming up, definitely not ice cold anymore, but would feel that way if she dumped it over her head. It would be nice to have shampoo, even conditioner. A bar of soap would be wonderful. Katrin imagined it would be a while before they had luxuries like that. Some werewolves roughed it daily in the mountains. Katrin never had. Any time they needed toiletries, her sire had always done some task for one of the old widows who spent their days making soap and other items, such as lotion, shampoo and conditioner, and even aftershave. In return for the items, litters on the mountain provided these women with fresh kill.

  Would it ever be that way for her and Jarvis? Were there even still litters living on the mountain? If so, there were undoubtedly quite a few less than there had been when she was growing up. Her mountain wasn’t too far from here.

  She remained lost in thought until, testing the water again, Katrin decided it was warm enough. She’d mastered tearing limbs from trees without any thought. It had come naturally. However, she couldn’t pour the water out of the cauldron and into the jugs with her mind. But then a week ago she hadn’t known this gift existed inside her.

  Katrin suddenly saw how this gift might be dangerous. A werewolf might smell too much of a good thing. Already she had tried making something other than wood move through the air. It had taken several tries, with her staring hard at the cauldron and trying to lift it without touching it, before understanding hit her.

  “You just told yourself you’d respect your gift then you turn around and believe you should be able to do more than what you can already do,” she scolded, wrinkling her nose in disgust.

  “Katrin.”

  She jumped at the sound of her name. She’d been too lost in thought to smell Jaeger approaching.

  “What?” she snapped.

  “Impressive setup.” Jaeger wrinkled his nose and sniffed the air. A small scar across his nose looked like a tiny streak of lightning.

  Katrin hated to guess what emotions he might pick up in the air. No way the fire would hide the smell of all of them.

  “What do you want?” she asked, forcing herself to sound calm.

  Jaeger took in the two fires, the clothes drying on sticks alongside one of them. A moment passed before he returned his attention to her. She’d never noticed before how alert his gaze was. Jaeger studied her face with bright eyes. His eye color was an opaque shade of hard, flat blue. She barely smelled him over the two piles of burning wood. Katrin hated not being able to sniff out another werewolf.

  “Jarvis asked me to come over here.”

  “Oh really?”

  She was naked, but he would have known that when he approached her. It was too late to cover herself, not that she had anything to put on. Her clothes wouldn’t be dry for a while. Males and females in packs saw each other naked in their human form many times during group runs. There was a difference between being naked as part of their culture, and being naked sexually. Katrin wouldn’t be prissy and cover herself. But she wasn’t going to stand and give him an eyeful either.

  “Yes, really,” he snarled, matching her biting tone. “The male cares about you.”

  “So he sends you to howl at me?” She wouldn’t let him smell her pain and clamped down on her emotions. Then squatting in front of one of the fires, she picked up a stick and began poking at it. Already the heat from the flames made her flesh tender.

  “Yes.” Jaeger didn’t elaborate.

  Katrin finally sighed, deciding if he were waiting for her to stand and face him, this would be a very long, drawn-out conversation. When she glanced over her shoulder, Jaeger’s attention was no longer on her face.

  “There a reason why he sent you to me?”

  “I’m running down the mountain.”

  “Why?”

  “I have some cash. We need supplies to rebuild.” He tilted his head and this time his dense blue eyes noticeably took their time traveling down her body. He smelled curious, almost fascinated. “I’ll be gone a while. You two need that time.”

  “Suddenly you’re an expert on relationships.”

  “It doesn’t take an expert.” He sighed and his curiosity faded. “Are there any supplies in particular that you’d like to have?”

  “Toiletries would be nice. Of course a bathtub and toilet would be nice too.” She managed a smile. Jaeger was sent by her mate, his intentions sincere. “I admit I was just wishing I had shampoo and conditioner and soap.”

  Jaeger nodded toward where the burned den was. “There’s a bathtub and toilet over there,” he told her, and offered a small half-smile. “Our sire had brought them to our den but never was able to give our mother indoor plumbing.” Instead of sounding sad, he made a face at her and his tone turned teasing. “Of course they’re covered with soot. Maybe you can put your talents to good use and lift them from over there to underneath the waterfall and clean them off.”

  “Only if they’re made out of wood.”

  “You can only move wood? Fucking tail. The howlings were right.”

  Jaeger shook his head but then met her gaze. He didn’t smell guarded anymore. Her gift fascinated him. If only Jarvis would feel the same way.

  “I’d heard that Malta werewolves have specific gifts. Some can make it rain or throw water from creeks, others can cause avalanches, and apparently you can break trees.”

  So she had some kind of an explanation now. Did Magda and Leisa have the gift the same way she had? Although thinking back, it seemed her sire had been able to do anything, move anything, build anything faster. Maybe he had simply been a super Malta werewolf. Or maybe it diluted down through generations.

  “Wait a minute,” he said, and wagged his finger at her. “My littermate isn’t made out of wood.”

  She almost cringed remembering how she’d sent Jarvis and McAllister flying away from each other when they’d been ready to fight because of her. “That was the first time I’d used my gift.”

  “Gift?”

  She sighed, shaking her head. Katrin didn’t feel like explaining how blessed she was to have part of her sire in her to Jaeger. “Thanks for asking if I needed anything.” Then after a moment, muttered, “I’ll thank Jarvis.”

  “Jarvis also said I was to ask how to reach your littermates.”

  “He did? I’d love them to be on the mountain with me again.”

  She shifted more to face Jaeger. “Please try and find them. They ran the same day they left me at the Toubec Ranch. There is a sanctuary run by owls in Washington State. We’d heard it howled that all breeds were welcome there as long as they didn’t smell of trouble.”

  “I’ve heard of this sanctuary.”

  “Magda and Leisa were going to run there first. Once in America they had planned on remaining in their flesh and taking a bus to northern Minnesota. There are leopards in that area but my littermates didn’t think it would be a problem if they kept a low profile and stayed in their flesh. My littermates were pretty sure that the leopards also have a sanctuary.” Katrin wished she had demanded more information from her littermates before they had run, leaving her on her own. “It might take a while to sniff them out. There is one way to find them faster but it might also bring danger to both of them.”

  “What’s that?” he asked.

  “My littermates won’t be accepted in any community the same way others are accepted if they run into new territory humbly.”

  “Why is that?”

 
There wasn’t any reason not to tell him the truth. Jaeger was running on her behalf and if he were going to try to sniff out her littermates, it was important he understood.

  “Magda and Leisa look like Malta werewolves.”

  His expression didn’t change, nor did his scent. Jaeger did tilt his head and appear to digest what she’d just told him for a moment.

  “Why weren’t they spotted in Prince George when they brought you to Toubec’s?”

  Katrin smiled. “Disguises,” she explained. “They wrapped their hair up and both of them wore hats. All three of us dressed like that after we came off the mountain. No one questioned us.”

  When Jaeger only nodded, Katrin finished telling him all she knew about her littermates.

  “They discussed crossing back into Canada after taking the American bus transportation. I’m not positive that they went to either sanctuary.”

  “They probably intentionally didn’t tell you their exact route to protect you.” Jaeger wasn’t looking at her now, but nodded once as he stared at the waterfall behind her.

  “We’d learned of a pack just outside of Kenora in Ontario.” Katrin sighed. Her littermates had discussed their plans openly around her. Now that she howled what she knew, it dawned on her the information they’d given her would have had them zigzagging here and there. “I guess you might be right,” she conceded.

  “I know some males in a few packs down in the States. I’ll howl discreetly and see what can be sniffed out.”

  “Thank you.” She still searched her brain, doing her best to remember exactly what her littermates had said prior to leaving her at Toubec’s.

  Leisa and Magda wouldn’t lie to her about where they were going. They didn’t need to lie to protect her. Katrin would never howl anything to hurt either of them. Her insides were suddenly in knots over the prospect of finding her littermates.

  “How long will you be gone? Will you bring them here?” she asked. Katrin would end up running in circles with worry if she didn’t know Jaeger’s intentions once he found her littermates.

  “Shouldn’t be hard to find them. And I will if they’ll run with me.” He gave her a crooked smile. “Any message for your littermates?”

  Katrin thought for a moment. “Tell them to never let their guard down and be ready to kill before they are killed.”

  Jaeger nodded, smelling of approval over the words of advice. He didn’t ask, so she didn’t tell him it was what their sire had always told them. This way, if he found Magda and Leisa, they would know he had run to them on her behalf.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Katrin refused to sniff the air to see where Jarvis was after Jaeger left. Her thoughts remained on her littermates. She worried for their safety, but had since the day they’d left her at the ranch.

  Would they be willing to run back to the mountains? Magda was so damn stubborn at times.

  She couldn’t focus on anything without worrying. Her littermates, and Jarvis, who was now her new litter, both had her upset. She relied on Magda and Leisa both being incredible hunters. Both of them knew how to fight. Wherever they ended up, it would be similar to how it had been for Katrin on Toubec’s ranch. And hadn’t she survived staying there?

  Barely.

  Katrin wouldn’t dwell on what she didn’t know. She would go nuts. She had to accept that they were fine.

  Shifting her thoughts, she focused on her own situation. How would she run by a male who only loved half of whom she was? It made matters even worse the moment she discovered why Malta werewolves had been marked for extinction. Katrin had controlled her desire to push her gift to deeper levels, to places that could make her dangerous even to herself. If she crossed over that line that hovered so close, she would no longer run with honor. If that happened, Jarvis would despise her, as so many others despised her breed.

  Her hands shook as she dipped the jugs in the cauldron. The water was nice and hot now—perfect bathtub temperature. She thought of the tub Jaeger had mentioned. That would be a task for another time but it would be so wonderful to soak in a full, hot tub.

  Katrin knelt at the edge of the bank, over the cold water swirling from the waterfall, and bent forward. After gathering her hair over her head, she reached for the first jug.

  Another hand took the jug from her. Katrin yelped.

  “Let me help,” Jarvis said, his tone soothing and his scent suddenly everywhere.

  She fought not to smell embarrassed. Her thoughts distracted her too much. Katrin hadn’t smelled Jarvis approach. Up in the mountains, letting her guard down might be a death sentence. It would be wise to remain focused only on whatever she was doing at that moment and not let her mind stray again. Her littermates weren’t the only ones who knew how to survive. Although the way she had just cried out like a stupid pup, Jarvis would have a hard time believing her capable of surviving up here.

  Katrin breathed in Jarvis’ scent as if it were her lifeline and relaxed. Although Jarvis wouldn’t be her backbone. Not that she wanted him carrying her through life by the scruff of her neck, but he especially wouldn’t be once he knew her thoughts. Already he hated how she moved wood. If he learned of her efforts to try to move the water, to understand where her gift could take her, the smell of his disgust would destroy her.

  She brushed hair from her face, turned and looked at him. Jarvis lifted a jug of water over her head.

  He simply muttered “let me,” and pulled her hair over her head again then slowly began pouring the water.

  It felt beyond good. Katrin relaxed, letting him soak her hair. She closed her eyes, willing all of her problems to flow away with the water. He used his free hand and combed her hair with his fingers. His gentle touch, the hot water and his confident, strong scent helped carry her to a place where she could almost believe there were no problems.

  Jarvis took his time, letting the water flow from the first jug slowly. His strong fingers massaged her scalp. And when all of her hair was wet and hanging around her face in long, thick strands, he gripped her neck, putting the jug down. His touch scorched her flesh.

  “Already you smell like my mountain.”

  “That’s because I need a bath,” she said, trying to keep it light so he wouldn’t smell her conflicting emotions. Was he trying to make up?

  Her insides burned. Wouldn’t it be the perfect cruel twist if Jarvis had finally decided that she still smelled like the same werewolf she had been when he first met her? There was no way she could harbor her sudden revelation from him. It would stink worse and worse until he demanded to know her thoughts. And he had a right to know the truth.

  “That’s because this is where we belong—together,” he added after a moment of silence.

  “Jarvis.”

  “Let me howl for a minute,” he said, although there was no bite in his tone.

  Katrin squeezed her eyes closed. He wasn’t issuing a command, demanding she hear how he, the male, had decided how it would be. Jarvis would never be that type of mate. Which was what made him so damn perfect.

  “I can smell how upset you are.” He pressed warm lips to her naked shoulder.

  Katrin shivered. Her nipples were hard and suddenly incredibly sensitive to every little sensation. Not from the cold, or the almost hot water pouring over her head. With that one kiss, a simple press of his lips against her wet, bare flesh, he had the power to create a burning frenzy inside her. Her breasts were swollen. Her nipples puckered and ultra-sensitive. Every inch of her body reacted to the slightest breeze, each tiny stream of water that dripped down her exposed flesh, and to Jarvis, who was inches away. The tiny hairs on her body stood at attention and leaned toward him like so many exposed nerve endings. If he would only rub against her, let her feel his hard-packed body press into her tortured flesh…

  “I have shampoo and conditioner.”

  There she went again, running away with her thoughts. This time when she inhaled, she smelled her lust. It was pointless trying to stifle her needs. Katrin saw no
point in denying that she physically wanted him.

  She smiled and water streamed over her lips. “I never thought two basic items would ever sound like such a treat.”

  Katrin smelled the strawberry-scented shampoo at the same moment the cold, thick liquid hit her scalp. Jarvis rubbed it into her hair, gathering her long strands until soapy streams spilled down her face. His fingers were rough and stimulating. Jarvis massaged, rubbed and stroked until she relaxed into a trance where finally no thoughts plagued her.

  Then he stopped. His fingers left her. Katrin remained where she was. Her arms were crossed over her breasts. Her puckered nipples remained excruciatingly tight even as they pressed into her arms.

  The sound of the waterfall suddenly reached her. While Jarvis had massaged her, all her other senses had receded. Katrin hadn’t heard or smelled anything.

  “Hopefully the water isn’t too hot.” His voice was low, not quite a whisper, but soft enough to tickle her flesh.

  Jarvis’ boots barely made a sound when he walked to refill the jug, then returned to her side a moment later.

  “I like it hot,” she murmured.

  It seemed as if he washed her worries away with the hot water. He poured it over her head and she blinked. She felt more than saw the many trails of soap rush out of her hair. Nothing had ever felt better.

  “When Jaeger and I left Toubec’s ranch and we ran to join you, I believed I had peace with our relationship.” Jaeger left her with soap racing off her body. His footsteps were faster now when he stepped away to refill the jug. “Let me know if the water gets too hot,” he whispered over her head, then spilled the jug’s contents over her, rinsing more soap away.

  Katrin shivered, and a moan escaped her lips. The water was hot, and the breeze around her cold. Her insides tensed. With each rush of water it was hard to smell Jarvis’ emotions. She didn’t want to miss anything he said, or any scent he released.

  “It feels fine.” She brushed wet hair from her face. “Go on,” she prompted.