Three Plays: The Last Carnival; Beef, No Chicken; and A Branch of the Blue Nile

by Derek Walcott

  Nile. Now, how that bird reach here, I self don’t know, and

  I ain’t see no need in asking, personally. But the bird live

  here, like the same bird in Egypt. Neither bird is more

  beauteous than the next. But, like all natural things,

  mister, it have a certain sadness to this bird…”

  [His own voice]

  Of course the man know, but he still ask him what it is.

  So the tourist ask him: “What is this sadness, man?” And

  the boatman answer: “She loses her colour in captivity.”

  [Offers the script]

  So I guess you don’t feel black, hiding in church.

  SHEILA

  [Not taking it]

  You wrote it in Barbados? It’s for Marylin. She’s redskinned.

  She’s the ibis, except she isn’t fading.

  [Silence]

  CHRIS

  Type it for me, then. I going back on stage. That is my place. Just type it. Two-fifty a page. Three-fifty!

  [Puts script down]

  I trying to be something more serious, Sheila.

  [BROTHER JOHN enters]

  You back again?

  SHEILA

  Christopher!

  CHRIS

  We still talking business.

  BROTHER JOHN

  I could well imagine.

  CHRIS

  I doubt that. This place ain’t have much imagination.

  BROTHER JOHN

  Ready, Sister? You’ll miss the bus.

  CHRIS

  Don’t mind the bus, pardner, I’ll give she a lift.

  BROTHER JOHN

  You want to talk business? It have a little cemetery back of the church. A brand-new burial ground that we just buy. Nobody ain’t there yet. Is a set of fresh plots. Talk business out there, because that’s where the Sheila you used to know is buried.

  CHRIS

  Who kill she? You? All you turn she into a mummy. Look!

  BROTHER JOHN

  Why you don’t ask her if she’s dead?

  Are you dead, Sister?

  SHEILA

  Brother John, this man and I …

  BROTHER JOHN

  Look, Brother …

  CHRIS

  Eh-eh, not Brudder, all you ain’t baptize me yet.

  [BROTHER JOHN points the umbrella at CHRIS]

  Who you is, James Bond?

  [BROTHER JOHN walks toward CHRIS, the umbrella pointed]

  Ay, ay, watch it, Reverend.

  BROTHER JOHN

  [Jabbing CHRIS with the umbrella]

  I suggest.

  [Jab]

  It would be a good idea.

  [Jab jab]

  To conduct your business outside.

  Or I may find it necessary

  [Points umbrella to his face]

  To take your eyes out.

  Which. Wouldn’t make much difference.

  Since you already blind.

  [CHRIS takes up his script]

  CHRIS

  I didn’t come here to shake your faith, Sheila.

  BROTHER JOHN

  Well said.

  CHRIS

  I ain’t talking to you, man!

  But ask yourself if you acting, that is all.

  Because it would be worse to fool those people than yourself.

  I see you need an umbrella to make your point.

  [Exits]

  BROTHER JOHN

  Stay here, and pray a little. Lock this door.

  [He exits]

  SHEILA

  [Kneels, praying]

  This isn’t my place. You know that. It doesn’t work.

  [She rises from her knees]

  There is no audience. There’s no one to play to.

  And suppose that row of pews out there,

  suppose those rows of empty pews out there

  started suddenly to applaud your prayers, eh, Sheila?

  Give me a sign, tell me where to go?

  [She kneels, then rises. Turns around. Silence]

  SCENE 5

  The stage, prepared for Antony and Cleopatra. Stage work light only. SHEILA, in plain street clothes, is waiting in the wings. She’s dimly seen. MARYLIN enters, searches, calls.

  MARYLIN

  Sheila? You in here?

  SHEILA

  Yes. Over here.

  MARYLIN

  You’re lucky I’m a Christian or I wouldn’t a’ come.

  You phone me to meet you here. I’m here.

  [She sits. Waits]

  Don’t be ashamed to come out. I forgive you.

  You called me a harlot. You called Harvey names.

  But we forgive you.

  [Shades her brow]

  Come out, Sheila.

  It’s lunchtime, and I have to go back to the office.

  Thank God, they took me back. I resigned, you know?

  Now I’m saving my money. It’s tough going, but …

  [SHEILA emerges. She leans against the flat]

  Your eyes look wet. Okay … Don’t pose, Sheila.

  You thinking of coming back, right? Not true?

  You didn’t impress God. You played the part wrong,

  and I could tell from your voice on the phone

  that you want to make back. I have nothing against you.

  I learnt to be tough in this business, strengthen myself

  until I’m ready for the States, and when I’m there,

  next year, year after next, wherever it is,

  this go be one hardhearted high-yellow bitch,

  because I know that’s the only thing they respect.

  And that’s what’s wrong with you, Sheila.

  The theatre ain’t no religion, it’s a whorehouse;

  so you were right. Well, if they want a whore,

  like the great queen, they’ll get it. Till I’m ready

  to find my virtue. Harvey taught me that.

  Speak. You choked up? Speak.

  Call us degenerates, harlots, sodomites.

  [Long silence. She stands up]

  So now there’s only me and Gavin, the ones with guts,

  the ones who don’t quit, who deserve to win, sweetheart.

  I can’t give her up. You called too late, Sheila.

  Go back to Him. I’m sure He’ll take you back.

  I’m sure you’ll be thankful that I spared you

  the embarrassment of begging. Well. I gone. God bless!

  [She exits. The work light fades]

  SCENE 6

  The theatre. IRIS and WILFRED waiting. PHIL, drenched, enters.

  PHIL

  Forgive the intrusion, but I sure you’d grant some shelter. The front open. I’da stay under the awning, but the wind blowing, too, and the rain falling slantwise. All you doing a show here, or what?

  IRIS

  “Or what” is right.

  PHIL

  I hear you, sister. Who here know what they doing? Just two of all you?

  IRIS

  Is twenty of us. But rain. A drizzle, and people staying home.

  PHIL

  ’Tain’t rain they ’fraid, nuh, sister, ’cause if it ain’t rain, the sun too hot. People always have a excuse, is natural. Like if it don’t rain in London or New York! Rain don’t stop white people, snow, tornado, what they have to do they does do. Here, if a butterfly fart, they jump. They would dance in the rain Carnival time, though. They would roll in the mud self. But all you doin’ something serious, you see. I was in that scene. Is to go ’way, that is all. Leave them home sheltering, and head for greener pastures. Give up early, or they kill you self in this place, yes. Slow death. Something in them out to kill you, dead or alive. I living, but they kill me. Dead of alive. I’se just a mummy now. Preserved in rum. Thank God for rum!

  [Takes out a cigarette pack, offers. IRIS and WILFRED refuse]

  IRIS

  Who kill you? Dead of alive?

  PHIL

  In specific, nobody
. In reality, everybody. In the end, the grog. I don’t touch a drop now. Just the bottle. But when I was high, I was high. You ever hear about Phil and the Rockets?

  WILFRED

  I think so. Which one you was?

  PHIL

  I was Phil. Three next tests was the Rockets. Remember this?

  [He croons]

  Shubee, shubaah, shubee, shubaah.

  A shit song, but the biggest local hit in ’63.

  [HARVEY enters, waits, listens]

  Wha’ happening, chief?

  WILFRED

  The Rockets bust, nuh?

  PHIL

  Money reach, quarrel start. Ego trip. Phil solo. It have

  two ways to dead in this business, success and neglect.

  [Suddenly, maniacally]

  All you wasting time, you wasting my time. You wasting my

  time. You think I ’fraid rain? If Phil and the Rockets ain’t

  make it, you think all you stand a snowball chance in hell?

  Is God rain! I hate idleness. Let me help all you

  move the sceneries.

  [He lifts a flat]

  HARVEY

  Wait. Rest the flat down. Hold on.

  [PHIL waits. HARVEY sits down]

  Show me what you used to do, Phil.

  [Places a crate on centre stage]

  PHIL

  With no music?

  HARVEY

  Why not?

  PHIL

  Nah. I need backup. The voice gone, you know.

  Besides, too much rum mash up my memory.

  HARVEY

  Ah, go on. There’s nobody here. Try.

  PHIL

  To tell you God truth, pardner, I frighten.

  He give me a talent and I blow it ’way.

  I ain’t have the right.

  HARVEY

  When last you try?

  [Long silence]

  PHIL

  You making me cold sweat. The rain too loud.

  HARVEY

  Ever thought of seeing a doctor, Phil?

  PHIL

  Doctor? For what? You know somebody who sick?

  HARVEY

  About what goes on in your mind, you know?

  [Silence. The rain]

  PHIL

  I sorry I does scream outside when all you does be rehearsin’. And the rain can cool my head sometimes, which does get so hot. This walking I does do all over town is like some fellows who does catch the spirit and start preaching to the traffic. Some of them mad, they look mad, they talk mad, but what they saying, sometimes it ain’t always madness. That the government ain’t care, that this one in racket, this one is a thief, this one forget where he come from, that there is a spirit overhead does guide us and does catch us safe in his palm, like my hand could catch this drop of rain. But all that walking around the streets and shouting, “You wasting your time, you wasting your time,” is not walking but running, running from the stage, from my gift, from the past, and that is why, I suppose, I does summon brimstone and ashes on everybody head. On a government that don’t give a fart—excuse me, miss—for its artists, on a people you have to remind to find some pride, but, ay, the rain stopping. And I go stop, too. But if it was in my power to sprinkle benediction on your kind, to ask heaven to drizzle the light of grace on the work you trying to do here, to waste your time and, in fact, your life, in making people see, and feel, and remember, you knows I would, and I would do the same for every actor, every entertainer, because they do incorporate man’s suffering inside their own; they does drive theirselves to the point of madness to make confusion true, because Phil know show business, but he also can tell a angel when he meet one. And you, sir … [Shakes HARVEY’s hand] you ain’t nothing less than that. Well, I got my part to play, and you got yours. [Takes up a piece of board and exits from the theatre. Sings] I know that my Redeemer liveth … [His voice fades]

  IRIS

  We going on, Harvey?

  HARVEY

  What?

  [Silence]

  Yes. Set up the stage.

  No. Why kid myself? I’ve had it. Go home. I’ll call you.

  IRIS

  But we came in all this rain.

  HARVEY

  Go home and shelter, then. Forget this.

  [Exits]

  WILFRED

  Harvey …

  SCENE 7

  WILFRED sets down two steel-and-leather chairs and stage becomes Piarco Airport, morning, a week later. An announcement comes over the system, as MARYLIN enters, in a blue office dress. She sits, waits, rises, sits again during the announcements.

  SPEAKER

  Attention, please! British West Indian Airways wishes to inform those passengers on Flight 900 …

  [The scream of an arriving jet blurs the announcement]

  MARYLIN

  [To the speaker]

  What?

  SPEAKER

  Your attention, please! British West Indian Airways wishes to inform those passengers on Flight 900 to London that there will be a further delay. Flight 900 will now depart at …

  [MARYLIN sinks in a chair, crosses herself in relief]

  MARYLIN

  Thank God …

  SPEAKER

  … nine-forty-five. We regret the inconvenience. However, those passengers who have still not yet checked with Immigration are requested to do so immediately, as the only further announcement …

  [HARVEY enters, in suit, tie, light spring coat, carrying small travelling bag]

  HARVEY

  Marylin? What you doing in here?

  MARYLIN

  Aren’t you on standby? What are you doing in here?

  SPEAKER

  … will be made immediately before boarding. Standby passengers are asked to remain in the main lounge or within audible distance of these announcements … [HARVEY holds up his hand to MARYLIN, listens] and prepare to board as soon as their names are called. We regret the inconvenience and apologize for the delay. Thank you.

  HARVEY

  Who let you in? This is for passengers only.

  MARYLIN

  I have a friend. You shouldn’t be in here, either.

  HARVEY

  I have a friend, too. You’ll be late for work.

  MARYLIN

  I nearly quit my job, you know that? I was prepared to live on nothing. For a while. Why’re you going, and so quietly, Harvey?

  HARVEY

  I am dying, Egypt, dying.

  MARYLIN

  You say it better than me, you old queen.

  SPEAKER

  Here is a further announcement …

  [Silence. They wait. The lights go out]

  MARYLIN

  Here is a further announcement: Electricity gone …

  HARVEY

  I left a letter with Gavin for you and the company. I’ve got another letter here … [Takes out a letter, then puts it away] but you can’t read it in the dark. There’s a job in England. The white-people theatre. The experimental stage. Have you heard of the Royal Court?

  MARYLIN

  Yes.

  HARVEY

  Of course. You’ve not only heard of it, you’ve had one. On the Nile. Well, it’s there.

  MARYLIN

  Sheila said once she had a vision in the dark of the theatre. She said you flew out of Victoria Hospital in your bathrobe over the roofs and you appeared to her and told her you were the Son of Man, and that the two of you would go through hell together. Sheila is preaching. This morning, I leapt up from a dream, believe it or not, and something said: Harvey is flying. But this time in a plane. Harvey is going. I called Gavin. He wasn’t there. I called Chris, he’d left for work already. Then I called this girl here, and she’s not supposed to divulge information, but what the hell, who’ll know, and I got in my car, and I drove talking and crying and arguing with myself, and begging God to keep you with us, and I couldn’t find you. I even went into the men’s room. I knew you had to pass by here, that you were on standby
. [The lights come back on] Isn’t that something? Isn’t that a sign? I’m sorry the group broke up. But if you have to go … Who are we? You’re a professional.

  HARVEY

  So are you.

  MARYLIN

  A professional is somebody who makes a living off their art.

  HARVEY

  Who can’t make a living off their art.

  MARYLIN

  And it can’t happen here. Don’t feel bad. You tried.

  HARVEY

  I mightn’t get on. I’m on standby.

  MARYLIN

  I’ve been a standby for years and I got on. You’ll get on. So what play will you be doing in London?

  HARVEY

  Who cares?

  MARYLIN

  Is there a part for me?

  HARVEY

  Is a white-people play, girl. I could put in a nurse, or a maid. Six, seven lines. And you right there on stage with real actors, white actors, real professionals. But you’d need a card. Are you Equity?

  MARYLIN

  Me?

  HARVEY

  You could borrow Gavin’s card. He’s Equity. He paid his dues. I guess we’ve all paid our dues. Fuck this country.

  MARYLIN

  [Weeps]

  Harvey … stay …

  HARVEY

  People will say we’re in love. Anybody watching this will think this is a love scene.

  MARYLIN

  It is a love scene. I love you. I thank you for what you did for me.

  HARVEY

  To what end? Fuck this fucking country. It drove Sheila mad.

  It frightened her. There’s no future.

  SPEAKER

  British West Indian Airways announces the departure of Flight 900 to London. Passengers please proceed to Immigration and then to the Departure Lounge. Standby passengers kindly wait till their names are called.

  [HARVEY stands up. MARYLIN, her head down, seated, holds his hand]

  MARYLIN

  Oh, God, please … stay. Stay with us. Please.

  HARVEY

  [In tears]

  I am dying, Egypt, dying …

  SPEAKER

  Mr. William Nettles.

  Mr. William Nettles.

  Kindly come to the BWIA counter.

  Mr. and Mrs. Harrylal.

  Mr. and Mrs. Harrylal.

  [MARYLIN stands, embraces HARVEY]

  HARVEY

  I’m a Judas.

  MARYLIN

  No.

  SPEAKER

  Mr. George Bascomb.

  Mr. George Bascomb.

  Mr. Harvey St. Just.

  Mr. Harvey St. Just.

  [HARVEY opens his bag. He hands MARYLIN a script]

  Miss Marylin Black.

  Miss Marylin Black.

  HARVEY

  I jumped. I thought it was your name. But your name is now Mary LaLune. Christopher’s writing a play. It’s not finished. You read it? It’s about us. [MARYLIN shakes her head] It’s very clever. He used the tapes, the ones we used for the improvs. He put everything down, as much as he could remember, everything. He’s an accountant, and he has a memory like a computer. Everything we tried to do is in here. The fights. The bad words. Gavin told him everything that happened and he put it in here, even the scenes with the chamber pot, and his breaking up with Sheila. [He holds her by her shoulders] You all deserved someone stronger. Keep shining, Miss La-Lune. [Exits. MARYLIN folds the script]