"Wake up, Jake... Wake up! Everything is going to be alright."
After what seemed like forever, Jake's eyelids fluttered open, and he sat up with a start rubbing his face. With furrowed brows, he peered around the room until his gaze settled on her.
"Vanessa... are you alright?"
"Yes, I'm fine. It is you I'm worried about. You had another bad dream." She reached for his hand.
"I was back in Afghanistan, again."
"That's not all. You mention Karen's name."
"I've been dreaming about her a lot lately." Jake hung his head.
Locating the flashlight in a chair, she switched it on and changed the subject. "I don't know about you, but I'm starving. And since we have a gas stove, how about I fix us some scrambled eggs. Then you can tell me about the dreams.
"Maybe it's best if I wait until next week for my appointment with Jim."
Vanessa ignored him and walked to the kitchen knowing he would follow her. As they sat feasting on their eggs in the candlelight, Jake began talking about his dreams. The stories came slowly at first. She could tell he was careful, not wanting to upset her. But after a few minutes, he sighed as if a weight was lifted from his shoulders and began opening up, explaining with more detail.
Jake told her how a few days before when he had used the machete to fashion her shorts, he dreamed about an incident with a rebel. He had cut Jake's arm with a similar long blade. And that he believed the walk in the woods was the basis for the dream, but fear was the emotion that triggered the nightmare. "PTSD is weird. For me, it takes something that is real, like one of my missions then amplifies the fear into a nightmare. Even if in reality, it didn't seem that bad at the time."
"That makes sense." Vanessa wanted to know more. "What about Karen? You were repeating her name... calling out for her."
Jake swallowed hard and looked away. Vanessa knew why. He was leery about upsetting her again over his past relationship with his ex-fiancé. So, she tried to put him at ease. "Look, I remember we had that big blow-up about Karen wearing the same diamond that you gave me —“
"The diamond ring belonged to my mother, Vanessa!"
"I know, I know... I'm over that. I love the ring." She held up her left hand to prove her point. "I didn't understand the whole situation at the time. But after a while, I got over it knowing how much the diamond meant to you... So, tell me what did you dream."
Stretching his arm across the table, he held Vanessa's hand as he told her how, after becoming an Army Ranger his romantic relationships had suffered. "My girlfriends got tired of me, loving them and leaving them... as the saying goes. It seemed every time I found someone I liked, it was the kiss of death, and I would be deployed. They were out of my life. But with Karen, it seemed different."
"How so?"
"She was the love of my life. I thought I was her's too because I received letters from her almost daily. I felt connected to Karen... like she was part of my roots... along with my folks, of course. Well, you remember how that ended. She was just stringing me along for money. But I didn't understand that until later when I was discharged. And then my folks died soon after."
"How does she play into your dreams?"
Jake explained how he had a picture of Karen he kept in his vest — a symbol of his hope for the future. But there was one dickhead, Cumberland, on his team that liked to razz him about Karen's picture and kept making rude remarks. One day they got into a scuffle. It ended with Cumberland promising he would never mention the picture again. "But in the dream, Cumberland takes Karen's picture and tears it up leaving me feeling angry and heartbroken."
The stories came one after the other until it was obvious to Vanessa that his nightmares centered around a couple of related issues. "Jake, I'm so sorry these things happened to you. They are sad and depressing. But it is clear to me, your greatest fear is being cut off from family or losing someone you love. That's what triggers your PTSD."
"Yes, I believe you're right, sweetie. And tonight, I thought I had lost you too. I know, you might think I overreacted by telling you not to go, but —“
"No, I should have listened to you. It's my mistake. I feel bad for Beth, and I had no idea the storm would be this severe. Please forgive me... I never had any intention of leaving you... I just was trying to do the right thing for a friend."
The chair scooted across the floor, and Jake set his empty plate in the sink. "Let's go to bed in our bedroom, shall we? My back is stiff from that lumpy couch."
"Good idea, I'm exhausted. Let me show you the way." Vanessa grabbed the flashlight and took off in front of him.
"I see you're still my trusty trail guide." Jake chuckled.
Chapter 7
The next morning Jake was awakened by a scraping sound that seemed to come and go with each gust of wind. He slipped out of bed, got dressed and headed for the back porch to investigate. It was still raining but the torrent from the night before had weakened into showers. In the muted light, he could see the yard was flooded and piled high with debris from the surrounding trees and shrubs.
Slipping on a pair of old boots, Jake stepped out into the yard to find the source of the noise. Before he took fifty steps, he heard the back door creak open, and Vanessa walked out on the porch still in her robe and slippers.
"How bad is it?"
"Not sure, but from the sounds of it, we lost a piece of the metal roofing over the clinic."
"Oh, God... What part?"
"Hold on a minute." Jake sloshed through the water to get a closer look. "From here, it looks like a large section over the center is peeled back. I need to see what I can salvage, and move the office equipment someplace dry."
"I'm coming. Wait for me to get dressed."
Jake turned to face her and pointed toward the shed. "I have some tarps in there. I'll go get them and meet you in a few minutes."
On his way, Jake looked over the outside of the house and was pleased it was unharmed, though, the stable was a different story. It appeared a quarter of the roof had blown off. At least, the building wasn't finished inside save the wooden floor where his office would be. Their insurance would cover the damage to the buildings, but not an income loss. The extra coverage was too costly. Jake's heart sank. It seemed just when they were about to get ahead something always set them back.
How many days will Vanessa be out of work, he wondered.
With a tarp over each shoulder, he trudged toward the clinic noticing that several trees had fallen across the driveway. And he thought of Vanessa's car. As it was, there was no way they could drive in town and bring it home. From the looks of things, it might be days before the roads were cleared. Rounding the corner, he chuckled to himself. Vanessa was standing out front dressed in cut-off shorts, and a faded t-shirt with a graphic of a sad-eyed beagle on the front.
"Go ahead and open the door."
"I was waiting for you. I didn't want to face this by myself." She slid the key in the lock and stepped inside
"Shit... This is worse than I thought," Jake mumbled.
Vanessa sniffled trying not to burst into tears as they surveyed the mess. Everything in the waiting room and around the reception desk was wet. Wet equipment, wet paperwork, and at least an inch of water covered the linoleum floor. The storm had done more than just blow off part of the roof. It left a gaping hole above the front desk and over Vanessa's office.
"Where do we start?" Vanessa turned this way and that, confused until she dropped her hands to her sides.
"The exam rooms are dry. Move what's salvageable in there while I try to sweep some of this water out the door," Jake told her.
They worked together. Vanessa started in the business office carrying the computer and her files into the exam room. When she moved to the alcove where the printer and fax were located, she clapped with joy. "These are dry! The only thing wet is the paper that was stored on the bottom shelf of the cabinet."
"That is good news."
After they finished wit
h the initial clean-up, Vanessa walked back to the house to gather plastic bins to store her files, and Jake left to check on the stable. Sure enough, it was just as he had feared. Unfortunately, the new wooden floor was ruined — the one project he had completed himself.
Considering the situation, Jake rubbed the back of his neck. Hopelessness began creeping over him. It was as if he was stuck in mud spinning his wheels. Shrugging, he kicked a board out of his way. Jake realized his anger was beginning to spin out of control and practiced deep breathing exercises while visualizing the anxiety exiting his body through his boots. In a few minutes his rage subsided, so he decided to check on Vanessa's progress.
The water in the yard had receded some, and the showers were turning to a mist. Trudging up the back porch stairs, he heard Vanessa's voice and turned to see her running toward him waving a piece of paper.
"Jake... the lights came back on," she yelled, splashing through the mud. "When I went back over to my office the fax from the realtor had come in." By the time she reached him, she was breathless. "The sale of my property and practice finally went through!"
"Just in time..." .
Jake picked her up and swung her around before they walked inside the house. Vanessa explained she needed to sign the papers and send them back to the realtor ASAP.
"That's a problem. We won't be able to Fed-Ex them until I clear the trees from the driveway," Jake said.
"Oh, I can sign digitally. The instructions are in the letter that came with the forms, and the packet was also emailed. The buyer is paying with cash. So, the realtor said we can close in a week."
"Won't you need the computer for that?"
Vanessa's cheerful expression faded for a moment. Then she grinned. "Yes, but my laptop is in the closet here in the house."
Jake pulled her close and kissed her head. "That's my girl. What a relief... and it couldn't have come at a better time. And..," he cupped her chin in his hand lifting her face, "I don't know how to thank you for last night. Talking over my dreams with you was a great relief. I was afraid the Karen thing would upset you."
She patted his chest. "I love you, Jake. Don't forget that. Now, if you will excuse me, I have to go find my laptop."
"While you're busy, I'll go check on the sailboat. I hope it didn't sink."
"Don't forget to take your phone," Vanessa said, over her shoulder heading down the hall.
"Already in my pocket."
Maybe the sale of Vanessa's property is a sign of good luck..
Outside he looked up at the sky. It was still grayish, but the sunshine broke through now and then. The boat wouldn't be a huge loss other than a sentimental one since it was a gift from Vanessa as a wedding present. But he kept his fingers crossed as he walked along the last section of the path, moving aside several limbs and pieces of shrubbery before the boat came into view.
Much to his surprise, it seemed fine other than a few pieces of light debris on the deck. He pitched a few small limbs up on shore before he opened the door to the cabin. "All is well here too," he told himself. Inside, he sat on a bench for a few minutes to rest and collect his thoughts.
They had sustained severe damage to only two buildings. The barn, shed, and house were untouched. But it would take at least a week beyond the weekend just to clean up the mess and clear the trees from the driveway. For a moment, he felt a bit homesick. There were no hurricanes in Arkansas.
Jake hadn't regretted the move to Florida. He had kept his wife safe. After their wedding they honeymooned for the first month, taking day trips around Florida to explore their new home state. During the few months that followed, they lived in a bubble of bliss searching for just the right place to live where they both could work from home. But in the last few days, everything had turned sour.
He missed Tucker, his childhood friend, and ranch foreman. For an instant, Jake wondered if he would ever get a chance to ride Tamara again, his prize barrel racing mare -- and Apollo. He closed his eyes and remembered how it felt when Apollo used to lick his hands when he set out his bowl of food.
On his way back to the house, Jake pulled out his phone and scrolled through his favorites list. Tucker answered on the first ring.
"Hey, man, what's up?"
"I see you kept my number," Jake teased. Just hearing Tucker's voice made him feel better.
"You okay? I see you were hit by the hurricane."
"It left us in a mess. But Vanessa and I are fine."
"We only have falling leaves up here... but glad to hear you two are alright."
"How are my kids, Tamara and Apollo?"
He listened as Tucker told how he rode Tamara almost every day and all Apollo did was sleep until it was time for dinner. After Jake thanked Tucker repeatedly for taking care of his pets, Tucker returned his thanks.
"Look, man, it is the least I can do for the guy that deeded me a cabin and an acre of his woods."
"I still wish you would reconsider coming down here to be my ranch foreman." Jake held his breath hoping Tucker might change his mind.
"Nah. Florida isn't for me... too hot and humid." Tucker laughed. "Hey, have you heard anything from the private investigator?
"Not a word... Of course, I haven't sent him any cash lately either, and he doesn't work for free."
"No worries, I just wondered."
They spent several minutes reminiscing about old times. To Jake's surprise, he learned Tucker no longer worked on the old Renegade Ridge but had bought the local feed store.
"It's just not the same anymore after you moved away."
"Look at you. A businessman! Guess I had been holding you back for years." The thought that he might have been a detriment to his best friend from advancing his career hurt Jake's heart.
"No, you didn't! It was my own mindset that held me back. And after you had the confidence to start over. I figured I’d give it a try too."
"So good to talk to you, Tucker."
"You too... Hey, I got to go. Someone's at the counter ringing that annoying bell. Give me a heads up when you're ready to come up. Maybe we'll take a road trip together back to Florida. I could stand a few days at the beach taking in the local bikinis... then fly back."
"I hope so. Talk to you soon, brother."
Jake was approaching the house when he ended the call. That's when the back door swung open, and Vanessa appeared holding a large glass of ice tea and a sandwich in the other hand.
"I was just heading down your way. Thought you might want a bite to eat."
"Thanks." Jake grabbed the glass and gulped down the tea.
Looping her arm around his, Vanessa walked with him the rest of the way up to the porch. "You know Jake, I really hate the windows being boarded up. Even with the lights back on it seems so dark inside." He nodded chewing his sandwich. "Do you think we can take them down this afternoon. I'll be glad to help."
Jake stepped back when he noticed her devilish grin. "Lady, it will take more than a glass of tea and a ham sandwich to get that job done."
"I have nothing else to barter with, kind sir."
"Oh, I think you do, madam..."
Chapter 8
Vanessa held Jake's hand in the waiting room of the VA clinic listening for her husband's name to be called. It had been almost six weeks since the hurricane, and the first time Jake had a chance to touch base with Jim since. Glancing up from a magazine, she nudged him. "How much longer do you think it will be. Our appointment to pick up my car is in less than two hours."
He shrugged. Without averting his eyes from a fishing show on TV, he said, "Should be anytime now. He's usually about fifteen minutes late."
Vanessa flipped another page. "I never keep my patients waiting unless I'm held up by an emergency."
Nodding dutifully, he half ignored her. The guy reeling in a huge tarpon on the show had his full attention. Jake's monthly visits to the counselor had continued to help with his PTSD. She knew the disorder would never go away on its own, and leaving it unaddressed by a pro
fessional would be a mistake. Since their talk about Karen and the source of the bad dreams, though, they occurred less often. But he was still plagued with them occasionally. Vanessa was surprised and pleased when that morning her husband had invited her to go along and meet Jim.
As she was about to walk to the receptionist to complain, a door opened, and a woman called Jake's name. Inside, they waited again in a small room that could have used a dab of paint. She also noticed the chairs were threadbare, and the narrow window had a slight crack.
I will never let my office go like this... Where is their pride, she thought.
Finally, Jim walked in wearing a pair of tattered jeans. But she was immediately drawn to his eyes; piercing steel blue, kind and wise. He extended his hand. "Hello, I'm Jim. I'm so pleased you decided to accompany Jake today... always wonderful to meet my client's significant other."
Taken aback, Vanessa corrected him. "I'm his wife, not his significant other."
Jake gave her the stink eye. "Vanessa, that is just a figure of speech. They don't put labels on relationships."
Jim smiled. "This day and age we never assume."
"Oh, I'm sorry..." Vanessa felt sheepish. After all, she dealt with animals where labels weren't an issue.
"I'm just glad you're here."
"Me too," Vanessa managed, still a bit undone.
Jim turned his attention to Jake. Interlacing her fingers in her lap, Vanessa listened as he explained how grateful he was that his wife had begun helping him cope with the dreams. The two men discussed not only his experiences during his tours of duty but also what had happened once he had gotten home. Jake spoke softly about his father and Karen. "I'm not mourning them anymore, but I still feel guilty at times. I keep wondering if I could have done more. Maybe Karen would have avoided drugs, and Dad wouldn't have worked himself into a heart attack?"
"Perhaps the reason is you found new love," Jim pointed out.
"I don't understand what you mean."
Mended Hearts: Bad Boy Action-Adventure Romance (Renegade Series Book 2) Page 5
