SWAY (Part 1)

by Jennifer Davis

  “I gave her fair warning not to. Besides, as soon as you walked in the door that weekend I knew I’d made the right choice.”

  I lost my composure for a moment, because for an instant, Justin’s confession felt intimate, like there was an underlying reason he’d chosen me that had nothing to do with friendship.

  “You did?” I bashfully asked.

  Justin shook his head “Yeah, of course.” He looked at me as if I was an idiot. “I gotta pee,” he announced, climbing over me to get out of the tent. I laughed at myself. I felt stupid. I’d completely misjudged that one. I blamed it on lack of sleep and decided to forget about it.

  31

  I squealed, scrambling backward as soon as my eyes broke open, scaring Justin, who sat straight up.

  “What is it? What’s wrong?”

  There was a squished up, distorted face pressed against the net window on my side of the tent. “There’s somebody out there,” I screamed. Then I heard riotous laughter.

  “Ugh, Larry!” I moaned, realizing it was Justin’s dad. Justin immediately started laughing and he hadn’t even seen what he’d done.

  I threw myself out of the tent, heart still pounding from fear. “What was that?” I questioned Larry as he stood there, still laughing at me.

  “I’m sorry, hun. It was just too good to pass up.” He pulled me to him and hugged me hard. “Merry Christmas,” he chuckled.

  “Merry Christmas,” I grumbled.

  “So what’s up?” Justin asked his dad, covering his eyes with both hands, deflecting the sun. Larry looked at me. “Your mom called, said she wants you to come on home. Some of your family is already there.”

  I knew it was my aunt Phoebe. She was my mother’s half sister and she always showed up early, claiming it was to “make herself useful,” but she never helped with anything. And her children, whom I only saw at Christmas, liked to rifle through my things and talk about how everything they had was so much better.

  “Dinner’s at seven,” Pam called as I was leaving. “Be sure and remind your parent’s that they’re always welcome, too.”

  “I will.”

  Pam had a huge dinner party every Christmas, catered of course. I’d been to every one since I was eleven and was looking forward to it.

  Christmas day was the only day my parents didn’t go to their office, but they were still on call in case of an emergency. It was also the one day of the year that we had dinner together, or any other meal for that matter.

  Although I was sort of dreading it, dinner at my house turned out to be better than I expected, even though my father had missed most of it. He was on the phone with a patient. Phoebe’s children weren’t so little anymore and they texted most of the day on their iPhones, ignoring everyone.

  About five o’clock I went upstairs to get ready to go to Justin’s. I took my hair down—out of the knotted bun it was in and showered. I felt like I smelled like ham and scalloped potatoes.

  I rolled my hair, put on fresh makeup and the blue, silk blouse with rhinestone buttons my mother had given me. I slid on a pair of dark rinsed jeans and high-heeled boots that I’d bought on a whim a few weeks earlier.

  When I left, my dad was still on the phone, my mother was halfway listening to Phoebe gripe about her ex-husband, and her children were still thoughtlessly texting. I almost felt bad for not wanting to be there, but I imagined the rest of them felt the same way, so I left.

  At Pam’s, there was a man in uniform holding the door open, offering to take guests’ belongings.

  Once inside, I couldn’t believe my eyes. I had just been here seven hours ago. It didn’t look like the same place at all. Pam’s Christmas dinners were always a big event, but this year took the cake. All the furniture had been moved out and there were eight, large, round tables in their great room beautifully decorated and set. There were servers, also in uniform, carrying trays of tinted champagne; red, green and gold.

  Pam skated over and handed me a flute of green champagne. “You look beautiful,” she said, before kissing my cheek.

  “Thanks, so do you.” Pam looked like a sparkly tree ornament. “Wow,” I gasped, looking around the room.

  “I know,” she smiled. “I used a different company this year.”

  “They did an amazing job.”

  “I agree.” She winked at me. “You should go see the patio—two words,” she paused arching an eyebrow, “love beds.”

  I giggled. There was no telling what she had going on out there.

  I made my way to the back door and went out. There were white twinkle lights draped throughout the pergola and mistletoe hanging everywhere. The faint sound of Kenny G flowed through the outdoor speakers. I stifled a laugh. It would have been romantic overkill if he hadn’t been playing Christmas music.

  There was a wood fire crackling in the stone fireplace, dispersing the scent of hickory in the air, my favorite scent. Then, I spotted them—the love beds. They were huge, tightly woven black wicker and looked like a tilt a whirl car from behind. The arched top covered a quarter of the bed for privacy. The cushions were thick, fluffy, and bright red with white faux fur pillows and blankets lying across the ends, ready for snuggling couples. She definitely meant business out here. Pam’s makeout headquarters. I giggled again and went back inside to find Justin. He was in his room.

  “What are you doing in here?”

  He held up his phone. “It was too loud out there to hear.”

  “You okay?” I got the feeling he wasn’t.

  “Yeah, fine. I just got an unexpected call.”

  “Like a girl unexpected call, or something’s wrong unexpected call?”

  Justin mashed his lips together. “It was Eve.”

  That surprised me. “Oh,” I muttered. “You need to talk about it?” I asked, feeling awkward about getting in the middle of that.

  “No, doc. I think I’ll make it,” he snickered.

  “I was only trying to be nice,” I snapped.

  He smiled. “I know. She’s called me a few times since we broke up, actually.”

  “You thinking about getting back together with her?” I wondered if that was why he’d come clean about the reason for their breakup last night, because he wanted her back. “If that’s what you want, I would be nice to her and I wouldn’t wear your shirts anymore and I promise I would—” He cut me off. “No, I’m not getting back with her. It’s not what I want. I don’t love her anymore,” he said quietly.

  “Oh.” I was relieved, but at the same time, after hearing his confession, I actually felt sorry for Eve. She must have still loved Justin if she was calling him.

  Once Justin really looked at me, he seemed to stall for a second. I smiled.

  “What’s with the shiny disco shirt?” he asked, his tone critical.

  “You don’t like it?” I glanced down. “It was a gift from my mother.”

  “It’s nice,” he noted nonchalantly.

  “I like how it feels,” I said, rubbing the fabric.

  “It does look pretty soft.” he grinned. I couldn’t read his face. I didn’t know if he was trying to be rude or what.

  “Well, for your information Pam said I look beautiful.”

  “You do,” he breathed, and instantly looked regretful that he’d said such a thing to me. My face flushed. I was…blushing? Because of something Justin said to me? In my defense, I’d never heard him refer to anything as beautiful that didn’t have four-wheel-drive before.

  We heard the muted tingling sounds of small bells ringing. Realizing it was time for dinner; we went and sat together at the table Pam had assigned us. The food was so amazing. I tried to take a bite of everything, but couldn’t do it. There was so much that there was no way I could taste it all.

  After a couple hours of mingling and several glasses of green champagne, I needed a break and went out on the back porch. Justin followed me. The chilly air felt good. Our warm snap was over. I propped myself against the railing and sighed.

  “Wh
at’s with you?” he chuckled.

  “I’m a little bit tired. Someone decided to take me camping late last night.”

  “Aw, poor baby,” Justin whined, and patted his chest. I leaned against him and closed my eyes. “You’re turning soft on me, Reynolds.”

  I pinched his side. “Ow,” he griped, and then laughed.

  “Yeah well, behave or they’ll be more where that came from,” I playfully threatened, looking at him. I couldn’t get over how different Justin looked to me. Stronger, bigger somehow since the last time I’d seen him. I leaned back against him, enjoying his warmth, and toying with the idea of running my hands up his arms to feel how muscular they were now.

  Then Pam came bursting through the door, giving me a good reason to stand up straight and stop thinking about feeling up her son.

  “Oh, you two are so cute!” she gushed. “And look where you’re standing,” she practically sang the words her tone was so melodious. There was no place you could stand on the porch without being under mistletoe. It was completely booby-trapped.

  “Pam, how much have you had to drink?” Justin questioned her.

  “Not nearly enough, sweetie.” She looked serious, ignoring his assumption. “Now, you two have to kiss.”

  Justin glared at Pam. I giggled. I couldn’t help it. I was a touch tipsy and the thought of Justin and me kissing was downright funny.

  “It’s Christmas law that if you’re standing under mistletoe with someone, you must kiss them. Now, I love you both, so I would really hate to have you arrested.”

  We both cackled. That sounded so ridiculous. She cocked an eyebrow at us. “We kiss all the time, Pam,” I blurted, without thinking.

  “Not on the mouth,” she reminded me. “So smoochie poochie,” she said, wide eyed.

  “Come on Pam, leave us alone,” Justin whined.

  “I’ll leave you alone right after you kiss her. On the mouth,” she added quickly, touching her index finger lightly against her muted red lips. She had a huge sloshy smile on her face, waiting for us to comply with her demand.

  “Go on,” she wiggled her fingers toward us.

  “No,” Justin answered sharply.

  I almost felt offended, as if he found kissing me a disgusting thought or that he might contract cooties.

  “You two are about a couple of chickens. Just do it already!” Pam howled.

  Justin quickly grabbed my shoulders and smashed his mouth against mine without any notice at all. “There. Now go away,” he ordered Pam.

  “Well, I bet that really made Annie weak in the knees. You didn’t kiss her, you accosted her!” She looked at me, her eyebrow arched. “Did he take your wallet, too, sweetie?”

  Pam and I hooted with laughter.

  “Fine,” Justin growled and turned back to me, taking my face in his hands, pressing his lips to mine, less forcefully this time. His mouth gently isolated my bottom lip between his. It felt nice. Like a sexier version of a peck. His hands moved down my back, pulling me until it was impossible for us to be any closer. Then his tongue brushed over my lip, making me feel like I was being electrocuted. My heart instantly reacted, thumping wildly. Justin’s warm breath against my mouth, and the soft sound it made as it exited his throat sent a chill up my spine. My skin flushed, my head was swirling. I wanted to push through the cloud of confusion in my brain, but it was too hard for me to think. It was happening so fast, but I still felt there should have been a greater force yanking me away from him, registering that it would be wrong to respond. That I shouldn’t want to respond.

  I breathed out, twisted my fingers in Justin’s hair, and kissed him back. His mouth moved slowly, softly. He kissed me in a way that I knew intended to make me weak in the knees—per Pam’s request.

  Mission accomplished.

  I knew I should stop. That I needed to stop. That this shouldn’t have been happening, but kissing Justin shouldn’t have made me feel like this either.

  I was so distracted that I had forgotten all about Pam. Justin must have, too. Her clapping and squealing caused us to release each other immediately. I clutched the railing behind me, still feeling woozy. I never expected Justin to kiss me, so the last thing on my mind was how it would make me feel. The fact that I had felt something confused the hell out of me.

  “No, don’t stop! That was good! Do it again,” Pam raved.

  “You said you’d go away Pam,” Justin complained, his breath staggered.

  “Alright, alright, I said I would go.” Then she disappeared without another word.

  Apparently neither one of us knew what to say, which was even more obvious once we’d been left alone. I was too freaked out to even look at Justin, much less speak to him. “I’m going to get us a drink,” he mumbled.

  Once he was out of sight, I took a few deep breaths as my thoughts raced. I groaned, shaking my head like an etch-a-sketch, trying to erase our kiss from my mind. When that didn’t work, I considered making a run for it, but talked myself out of it. I didn’t want him to think that I couldn’t handle it, or that something was wrong. Then I wondered if he might decide not to come back. I would look stupid for staying if he didn’t. But, this is his house, he wouldn’t just leave on Christmas, I rationalized.

  Calm down, Annie, I told myself, pacing around the big fluffy chairs before I finally sat down on one.

  “Wow,” I breathed, touching my still tingling lips, which curled into a huge smile, leaving my fingers stranded on my teeth. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it, I repeated in my head, scooting back in the seat, forcing my brain to try and put the memory away. I grabbed the white, fuzzy blanket at the end of the seat and covered up with it.

  When Justin reappeared, I laughed so loud that I startled him. “What are those?”

  “I thought we might need something bigger than a flute.” My eyes widened in agreement. He’d filled monster margarita glasses with so much champagne that it was spilling over the sides.

  I steadied the glasses while he got under the blanket with me. “I hope were not breaking some kind of Christmas Law by drinking champagne from these glasses instead of a proper Champagne flute. I don’t know if I can take any more of Pam’s interference,” I mumbled.

  “I’m sorry,” Justin said sincerely. “I shouldn’t have let her push me like that…” He looked at me. “I shouldn’t have kissed you like that.”

  “I kissed you back,” I said shyly. “It’s my fault, too.”

  His eyes cut away from mine. “Well, we shouldn’t have any more problems out of Pam. I threatened to go back to school early if she comes out again.”

  I was relieved, but Justin seemed so unaffected that it almost hurt my feelings. Here I was, all weak and mushy because of our kiss, and he wasn’t anything—just normal.

  Once I had a sufficient amount of my drink, I brought up my favorite subject.

  “What happened with you and Denise?” Talking about her would surely distract me.

  “It just didn’t work out.”

  “Pam said you took her home the next day.”

  “Yep.”

  “Do you not want to tell me why or was that one my fault, too?”

  “I just don’t know if you want to hear it. It’s pretty twisted.”

  “I think I can take it.”

  “She didn’t like you.”

  “Big surprise,” I grunted.

  “Ironic. Huh?”

  “Yeah. Ironic,” I smirked.

  “She said to tell you Oodles Castlegate is her stripper name.”

  “She knew what I was doing?” I thought she’d be too bubble headed to figure it out.

  “Everybody knew what you were doing.”

  “It’s not nearly as funny as I thought it would be. Hers is actually kind of cute. Mine sounds like a cross-dressers stage name.”

  “What is it?”

  “Frank Fanning.”

  Justin laughed. “You named your goldfish Frank?”

  “So. I was five. I had no idea what I chose to name that f
ish would be of such great importance later.”

  “Frankie Fanning would work for you. It sounds hot.”

  “Uh huh. I remember you had a dog named Bubba when we met.”

  “Doesn’t matter.” He shook his head. “Boys don’t have stripper names.”

  “Boys can be strippers, too.”

  “Not this one.”

  I laughed at the thought of Justin on a stage somewhere in a thong prancing around to a techno song. He shook his head at me as if he’d seen my vision. I stopped laughing, put an apologetic look on my face, and moved the subject back to Denise.

  “Why didn’t Denise like me?”

  “She didn’t like that you and I are so close.”

  “What’s so twisted about that?” It sounded like the usual problem to me.

  “She said she saw us in the yard arguing.”

  “And that bothered her?” I thought it would have made her happy.

  “Sort of,” he said hesitantly. “She said we fought passionately.”

  “Huh?” I giggled at the sound of his voice attached to that word. It resonated in my brain. “She broke up with you because you and I were fighting. With emotion.”

  “Not exactly.”

  “What then?”

  “It’s nothing.”

  “You lie, and not well, so spill it.”

  “Well…she said there was no way that you and I didn’t have feelings for each other and that she didn’t want to stick around for the day when we figured it out.” Then he added, probably for my benefit. “Whatever that means.”

  “Oh.” My tingly brain caught up. That explained his carefulness in telling me. I thought about it for a second. I’d never considered that before. Of course I had feelings for Justin—just not those feelings. Well, at least I didn’t think I had those feelings for him.

  “She’s right, you know—about the feelings.” I intentionally slurred the word.