Her Convenient Cowboy

by Lacy Williams

  She received her answer from the awkward silence and took the girls away, leaving Rose at the counter with the dirty dishes.

  Her rioting emotions made her unable to rejoin the table. She knew they would see something wrong on her face. She wasn’t good at hiding her feelings. So she plunged a plate and her hands into the hot dishwater and began scrubbing.

  Was that what Davy thought she expected of him? In the midst of her desperation, she’d had a very fleeting thought that he would make a fine husband, but she had no expectation of that from him. Why would he attach his life to hers when all she could offer him was a burden?

  Hot tears pricked her eyes, but she fought them back with all her might.

  Was Davy’s family really talking about him like that? Saddling him with her? If so, was his mother offended?

  He’d been a friend since she’d met him, even when she’d tried to keep her distance.

  And this was how she repaid him? By ruining his reputation? What about when they went into town? When she tried to find a job? Would people there hear about their nights spent at the cabin and think the worst of her? Even though Davy had slept in the lean-to, people could talk. Would she even be able to get a job that she desperately needed?

  With her thoughts spinning and the slosh of water to distract her, she didn’t hear an approach. When a male voice spoke, she jumped and splashed water on her skirt and his trousers.

  “I’m sorry,” said the youngest brother, the one named Seb. “I guess it’s so noisy you didn’t hear me.”

  He must’ve been close to her age, maybe a little younger.

  He stood at her elbow and picked up a towel from the counter, holding out his palm for the plate she clasped as it dripped down into the dishwater.

  She gave it to him, and tears threatened again. She sniffed valiantly and swiped at her cheeks with her damp forearm.

  “Are you crying?”

  The horror in his voice made her laugh, though it was a thin, tremulous sound.

  “I’m getting ready to have a baby.”

  Maybe she meant that her emotions were in an uproar. Maybe it was the uncertainty in her situation, the desperation that she was trying to explain.

  He took the next plate from her wobbly fingers. “Don’t worry so much. Davy will take care of you.”

  That was what she was afraid of.

  Chapter Nine

  The morning dawned cold but clear. Davy worked outside the barn harnessing horses to two wagons. He would go up the mountain after he got back from worship at the Bear Creek church with the family.

  Cold air bit his exposed skin, and the horses’ breath fogged out in clouds. But the morning sky was clear as he smoothed leather straps and buckled the horses in. Chickens clucked in the pen off the side of the barn, a familiar sound of home.

  His ma had offered to introduce Rose around at church, but even though he should be on his way, some part of him hesitated to just leave her.

  Matty had ridden in during breakfast. He must’ve left at full dark this morning to get back in time to attend worship with the family. But he loved being around people and no doubt had wanted to see his friends from town. He’d mentioned that he’d tucked the dog back in the lean-to.

  Davy’s thoughts circled back to Rose. She’d seemed so subdued last night, even when Oscar’s girls and Seb had made strides to reach out to her.

  He didn’t want to leave her. Maybe a part of him didn’t want to go back up the mountain alone, but there was more to it than that. He’d promised her his friendship, and he couldn’t just walk away when she was in such desperate straits.

  But his pa had reminded him of the plans he’d made and the investment he’d put in. Those cattle wouldn’t last the winter without some human help.

  It was a conundrum. He hoped to help her find something in town. If she was in Bear Creek, she would be close enough that he could keep their friendship after he’d finished the winter.

  And maybe in time, when she’d mourned her husband and was ready to move on, she would be open to his courtship.

  He hadn’t slept last night for thinking of it. He knew it was too early to be entertaining thoughts of marriage and a family with Rose. They barely knew each other. She was still mourning her husband. She would become a mother soon.

  His thoughts about marriage from yesterday had stuck with him, but he didn’t think she was ready for that.

  She’d shared a room with Breanna last night, and hadn’t joined the family for breakfast. He hoped she was resting but had a suspicion that his family had overwhelmed her last night.

  He had both wagons hitched when there was finally movement from the house. His pa and ma and the three youngest kids emerged with Breanna and Rose behind. He let out the breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding.

  She met him at the second wagon, wearing his ma’s dress, her hair up. She had shadows under her eyes and was biting her lip.

  Her smile was subdued as she allowed him to boost her into the seat next to him. He got a whiff of something flowery and knew the girls must’ve bathed last night in preparation for services this morning.

  “We’ll pick up Oscar and his crew on our way to town,” he explained when she gave him a curious look. “Did you grab something to eat?” he asked, because it seemed too intimate to ask her how she’d slept.

  “Your mama took care of me,” she said quietly.

  And then there was just the silence between the two of them, the soft clop of the horses’ hooves in the snowpack. He missed their easy conversation from that last night at the line shack.

  “Breanna keep you awake talking?”

  “Has she always been so...”

  “Rambunctious? Tomboyish?”

  “Independent?” she offered with a half smile.

  “Always. She was four when Jonas found me and Ricky and took us in. She already had five older brothers and thought she was one of us.”

  “I like her.”

  Her simple statement warmed him. Breanna had been special to him since he’d arrived on Jonas’s doorstep with Ricky. Knowing that Rose thought she was special, too, even though the girl could be abrasive and tomboyish, made him like Rose all the more.

  He cleared his throat. He had something he wanted to say before they arrived at Oscar’s place.

  “I want you to know that I’ve felt what it’s like to be truly alone. And I want you to know you’ve got a friend at your side.”

  She turned her head to him, and though he kept his gaze on the horizon just above the horses’ ears, he could feel her perusal. Probably she was remembering everything he’d told her about being thrown out by his uncle.

  “Thank you,” she said quietly.

  He found the courage to glance at her and found her watching him with the most open expression she’d shown him since they’d met.

  He held her open, warm gaze for long moments until he had to pull up the horses outside Oscar’s place. The door snapped open, and the girls spilled out of the cabin, followed by Oscar and Sarah and their toddler at a slower pace.

  The womenfolk and the toddler piled in the back, and Oscar mounted up on the horse he’d tied outside the corral.

  With the others present, there wasn’t an opportunity to continue talking as they had.

  Likewise, the churchyard bustled with people. He was gratified that Rose stayed close to his side as he escorted her inside. It was a tight fit in the family pew, and they ended up thigh to thigh, shoulder to shoulder.

  She sang the congregational songs quietly, her voice a sweet soprano. Her head was near his shoulder when they stood to pray. It made him want to close her hand in his. He gripped the pew in front of him to stave off the urge.

  After the service ended, he caught sight of the man who ran the local mercanti
le. It was likely the man would have a lead on a possible job for Rose. He knew everyone in town.

  * * *

  After the worship service concluded, Rose swallowed back the knot of trepidation that clogged her throat as the sanctuary burst into a cacophony of conversations.

  The press of bodies and noise were almost unbearable, and she allowed the comfort of Davy’s hand at her elbow. Something indefinable had changed between them this morning in the wagon.

  What he’d shared as he’d escorted her down the mountain had touched her deeply. He’d been abandoned. Like she had.

  Even though her papa’s death and Jamie’s hadn’t been intentional abandonment, the fact remained that she had no one else in the world to lean on.

  And he hadn’t said so in so many words, but the undertone of emotion in his voice had conveyed enough. She didn’t want to need him. But she did.

  “Mr. Sands!” Davy called out and a man with salt-and-pepper hair turned away from the mass of people exiting the church.

  “I’d like to introduce Rose Evans. She’s new in town and looking for work.”

  Rose shook the man’s meaty hand, saw his eyes drop briefly to her stomach, where her shawl only partially obscured the baby’s girth.

  “I’m sorry, Davy. Emily’s still helping me part-time at the store. Last I heard, the boardinghouse was looking for a helper, but I think Mrs. Tavish filled the position.”

  Undeterred, Davy next accosted the boardinghouse proprietor, who confirmed that she’d already found someone to help her clean and cook.

  He hailed a handsome man about his age with a lovely dark-haired woman on one arm and a toddler on his hip.

  “This is Sam and Emily. Emily is Mr. Sands’s daughter, and Sam is Penny’s younger brother.” Davy introduced them to her. She didn’t miss the speculation in their eyes, especially when his hand came to rest on her lower back.

  Did they think she and Davy were...together? Heat rose in her face.

  “Is there any chance you’d be looking for a clerk at the bank, even part-time?”

  This Sam was a banker? She looked frantically at Davy. “I told you I can’t cipher!” she hissed.

  “You picked up the game of checkers quick enough. You’re a fast learner.”

  His quiet words of praise were like a sunburst in her heart, sending warmth throughout her.

  But it was short-lived. Sam shook his head, his expression showing what seemed to be genuine remorse. “Even if she was trained, I don’t have any open positions at the bank. I’m sorry.”

  He clapped Davy on the back. “I thought you were wintering up in the line shack? You dig yourself out just for Sunday services?”

  Davy looked down on her, his eyes warm and open as they had even this morning. “Something important came up. I’ll get back up the mountain eventually.”

  He excused them from the conversation—it seemed as if Sam would’ve stayed and chatted a bit if he’d hadn’t.

  “Don’t fret,” he said and steered her toward an elderly woman.

  Who turned out not to need a companion. The way she’d looked down her nose at Rose’s belly made her think she doesn’t want a pregnant companion.

  With each person they spoke to, Rose’s disappointment and desperation grew.

  Davy didn’t falter in his faith that she would find employment, even when it was only his family left in the churchyard as the last of the rattling wagons departed.

  The sun shone brightly in the clear blue sky, almost as if mocking her upset. Her nose burned. The cold wind stung her hot cheeks and made her eyes tear. She wasn’t quiet enough to keep Davy from hearing her sniffle. He took one look at her face and pulled her behind the wagon, out of hearing range of the others.

  He took her upper arms in his big palms, and she was thankful for the way he shielded her from the wind and prying eyes.

  She shouldn’t lean on him, but she was so tired, and the hopes that she’d held earlier had melted like snow on a warm day.

  And then he shocked her by cupping her cheek with one warm palm.

  The action was too intimate, but she couldn’t find the will to push him away.

  She didn’t have to worry that he would take liberties. He only tipped up her face and tucked a windblown stray curl behind her ear before his hand fell away.

  It was hard to look up into his face. His eyes were as steady as ever.

  “Don’t give up,” he whispered fiercely. “We haven’t exhausted all avenues yet.”

  She wanted to believe him. “But...”

  “We’ll find a place for you and your babe, yet.”

  Looking into his face, a face that had become dear to her somehow, she wanted to believe.

  She just didn’t know if she had the strength.

  * * *

  Davy remained in the kitchen after the noon meal to help his ma with the dishes. He also knew she wanted a chance to speak privately to him. He wanted to know what she thought about Rose.

  She told him, almost immediately “She seems awfully frail. How did she even survive up there on her own?”

  “She’s stronger than she looks.” The words were telling and he kept his eyes on the pot he scrubbed out. “I’ve got her to open up to me a little bit. Her pa is gone, so is her husband. And it seems like her family wasn’t close, not like ours.”

  Penny sighed, accepting the pot to rinse it before she toweled it dry. “So there’s no one back home that can help her?”

  “No,” he said. “I talked to everyone I could think of after church this morning, and no one is looking for hired help in Bear Creek.”

  “She can stay with us as long as she needs,” Penny said quietly.

  But he heard something, some tone in his ma’s voice that he wasn’t used to.

  And he remembered the way that Rose had shut down at the table with his boisterous brothers last night. His ma would let her stay, but who would protect her? Comfort her?

  “What about down in Calvin? Your ma has some good connections with the dressmaker, and I’m sure your pa has lots of business associates.”

  Penny’s father owned the bank over in the town of Calvin.

  “That’s a good idea. I can certainly write a letter to my mother. She might know of someone looking for help.” Penny nodded, the tense lines around her eyes easing a bit. “Do you know what skills she has?”

  “She’s a decent cook,” he said. “Seems like she knows her way around the inside of the house, cleaning and such.”

  Penny hesitated, and his hackles rose. “Did anything...? I know we’ve taught you to be a gentleman, but is there anything you need to tell me or your pa about what happened up on the mountain while you two were alone?”

  Davy felt heat blaze up the back of his neck. “Of course not,” he snapped, offended. “I slept in the lean-to every night.”

  Penny gave up the pretense of the dishes and turned to face him head-on, letting the fork she’d been drying clatter to the work counter.

  “It’s just...” She hesitated, and that wasn’t like her. She usually spoke her mind no matter what.

  The back of his neck went from hot to cold. “Just what?”

  “You have...the way you’ve been acting and some of the things you’ve said about her—it’s clear to me that you’ve got feelings for her.”

  That hot flash up his neck was back, but Davy held his ma’s gaze steadily. He’d barely admitted to himself that he felt more than friendship for Rose, but he might’ve guessed his ma would see it. She was perceptive like that.

  But she didn’t seem altogether happy about what she’d said.

  “And if I do?” he asked, voice low. You never knew when someone would be listening around a doorjamb in this house.

  “I would caution you to take th
ings very slow,” she replied. “You don’t know all that much about her.”

  He knew enough.

  “Your pa seemed concerned about how she ended up in the cabin, and her circumstances...”

  He crossed his arms over his chest.

  Penny laid her hand on his arm, beseeching him with caring eyes. “If I were in her position, I wouldn’t be looking for a job. I would be looking for a husband.”

  His chest cinched tight. “I can think of several folks in town who started out in a marriage of convenience or even a marriage based on friendship, who have a good strong marriage.”

  “So can I,” Penny said with a stubborn lilt to her chin. “But there’s no reason to rush into it. I’ve said she can stay here for as long as she likes.”

  Yes, but he would be up on the mountain. And what if Rose decided she didn’t want to be a burden to his family and moved on?

  “What’s different about Rose? You accepted Fran right away, even though she was a stranger to you when she married Edgar.”

  Her expression softened the slightest bit. “They were already married. If your father and I would’ve been here, there would have been no need for them to marry so quickly. We would have taken in Fran and Emma, and your brother could’ve had a longer courtship.” She shrugged. “But by the time we returned from Boston, there wasn’t anything to be done.”

  So she wasn’t outright rejecting Rose for him. She just didn’t want him to rush into it. And maybe Rose wouldn’t want that from him anyway.

  “Nobody said anything about getting married,” he muttered. “Would you excuse me?”

  He shouldered out into the crisp air, heading for the barn. Or anywhere away from his ma right now.

  Part of him recognized that she was right. He hadn’t known Rose very long. He didn’t know much about her family history, only that she was alone and needed someone.

  He couldn’t forget the Rose that he’d found that first night on the mountaintop. The desperation she’d shown.

  Nor could he forget that after several days together she’d become more settled. Not with his family. With him.

  He knew what it felt like to be abandoned. And he didn’t want Rose to feel that from him, not if he could help it.