by Nicole Dykes
Back to You
Nicole Dykes
Copyright © 2018 by Nicole Dykes
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
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Contents
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Epilogue
Afterword
Other Books By Nicole Dykes
About the Author
Special Thanks
Thank you to everyone who has stood by me and given my books a chance! I can’t thank the members of my group, Nicole’s Novelties, enough. Their participation and support absolutely blow me away! Please never hesitate to share your thoughts and feelings in there!
Thank you so much to my friend, Emma, for always being there for me and for all your help even though you’re super preggers! Still not so patiently waiting to see pictures of that sweet baby boy!
Thank you to Ariadna, who does all my teasers and stays up late chatting about books and everything else! My book Yoda, aka, Boda.
Thank you to all my beta readers! Don’t know what I would do without you and our chats about these characters.
Also, Melissa Teo for being there from the beginning, you can usually find her in her awesome readers’ group, B.A.N.G. (https://www.facebook.com/groups/BookSmackedBangers/ ). I can’t say enough about bloggers and how their passion for books keeps me going!
Also, a VERY special thank you to my sweet, understanding editor, Dena. This woman puts up with my crazy timelines and always takes it in stride. She encourages me to keep going and builds me up!
Thank you also to Veronique, who designs all of my covers and does my formatting. Again, she puts up with my crazy timelines and has never let me down.
Love you all more than words could ever express.
Prologue
Maddie
“This isn't nearly as big as we discussed, and that kitchen is appalling. There's so much that would need to be changed. I thought I made it perfectly clear that we are not looking for a project, Jamie.” Mrs. Winfred condescendingly glares at me, her dark eyes screaming ‘I’m better than you.’ Although, she's technically right about the house being smaller. It is about one hundred-square-feet less than the 12,000-square-foot goal she set. But considering she and her stuffy husband want to stay under three mil, this is a steal.
I purse my painted red lips tightly and put on my most professional smile. “You’re correct, Mrs. Winfred. However, the sellers are quite motivated and have come down on the price quite a bit.” I open the sliding-glass patio door, walking outside, my heels clicking on the cement as I gesture to the underground pool. “And what about this pool? I’d say that more than makes up for the kitchen and a teensy bit less room.”
I can feel Mr. Winfred's eyes sliding along my body, trailing over my legs, lingering over the small amount of cleavage exposed by my satin blouse, and then finally finding my eyes. “I’m not sure there's enough room for all my cars.”
Mrs. Winfred rolls her eyes, clutching onto the collar of her Chanel blouse as she glances out over the sparkling water of the pool. “This won't do. I refuse to hold your hand through this, Ms. Maddison. Make more of an effort, or we will take our business elsewhere.” Her bony hand grabs hold of her husband’s as she spins on her heels. “Come along, Mark.”
Mr. Winfred finally pries his gaze off my ass long enough to follow his stuck-up wife from the backyard and out the front door.
Rich assholes.
I’m surrounded by them these days, being one of the top real estate agents in Kansas City. I only deal in million-dollar listings. At thirty-two, I didn't get where I am by sitting on my ass. Nor do I get my feelings hurt when spoiled, wealthy whiners throw tantrums.
My phone rings in the pocket of my skirt, and I see it’s my assistant, Jessica.
After working together for three years, she and I have developed quite a system and become fairly close. Well, as close as I’ll allow myself to get to anyone. “Hey, it was a no-go with the Winfreds, but I’ll hook them soon. I have an appointment with the Browns in about an hour, and they’re a lot more agreeable.”
“You might want to reschedule that.”
Her voice sounds weird. “What? Why? Is something wrong?”
Her normally confident voice sounds slightly shaky. “There's a Shane Keller here looking for you.”
I nearly drop the phone from my shaking hand when I hear that name.
Shane?
No. It can't be.
But how would she know that name?
“What does he want?”
Her voice whispers into the phone, “I’m not sure. He won't tell me anything other than he needs to see you.”
Sounds like Shane. “Okay. I’ll be right there.”
I hang up, my heart thundering inside my chest as I lock up and climb into my shiny new SUV.
Shane Keller? This can't be real.
I drive across town to my office in downtown Kansas City, pulling haphazardly into my assigned space and nearly running into the building.
My office is on the sixth floor, and the elevator ride is torture. When the elevator dings and the door opens at an achingly slow pace, I’m confronted with my past, standing before me in all his tall, brooding glory.
Shane's bright blue eyes bore into mine, his lips a straight, severe line just like I remember. “Maddie, you miss me?”
A shudder takes over my body hearing his deep voice again, cloaked in seriousness.
He wouldn't be here unless something went horribly wrong.
One
Sixteen years earlier . . .
Logan
“I’m gonna grab another beer. Watch my girl. Don't let anyone play grab-ass.”
My brother, Shane, slaps my back after his command and then walks through the back door of the old farmhouse, heading where the still-thriving Friday night party is taking place. Now that school is almost out and it’s getting warmer, these parties are becoming more and more frequent. Maddie and I are left alone on the porch, looking up at the bright stars, uninhibited from any other light.
Maddison James is my best friend since I can remember, the girl that stole my heart when I was six, who has been with me through everything, including my dad dying in a work-related accident when I was twelve. My mother lost it, overcome by grief, and it’s been up to Shane and me to keep her as sane as we can since. Luckily, I’ve had Maddie to help get me through it.
“Man, the sky is pretty fucking cool tonight.” I poin
t from my spot on the top stair to a bright cluster of stars shining brightly in the dark midnight-blue sky.
Maddie looks upward, her honey-brown hair shimmering in the moonlight and her small arms shrugging upward. “I don't know. I'd sure love to see something else on that horizon once in a while.”
I slide down to the bottom step where Maddie sits and settle in next to her. Her long, tan legs are stretched in front of her in those short cutoffs that drive me fucking crazy. “Like what?”
“I don't know. A skyscraper or five? Hell, anything besides barns, cows, and tractors.”
“Hey, that’s what built this town. That and blood, sweat, and oil.”
“Exactly.” Her pretty, green eyes meet mine. Fuck, she's almost too perfect. Her face is gorgeous, nearly angelic, but she has a sexy edge to her that has me, and most of the guys in our high school, drooling. I have to remind myself she’s with Shane as I’m hypnotized by her full and pouty pink lips as she speaks. “Blood. Lots of it. Not to mention souls. This town steals your soul.”
I look out over the flat wheat field directly in front of us that stretches for miles. “You really want to leave?”
“Don't you, Logan?”
I turn to face her. It’s never even crossed my mind, but I can see it in her eyes now. She has adventure in her eyes and a restless spirit. I shrug my shoulders and nudge her bare arm with mine, the contact nearly too much for my teenage brain to handle. “This town's not so bad. I mean hell, we know everyone. It's far away from any big city. It's safe.”
“It’s too safe.” Her face nears, her lips alarmingly close to mine. “And it’s dangerous all in one.”
I swallow the lump in my throat. My brain is starting to short-circuit from the citrusy fresh smell of her. “Your dad getting worse?”
She shakes her head the way she always does when I mention her father. He's a drunk and the worst kind because he doesn’t want to hurt just himself. He has a nasty habit of also taking out his aggression on Maddie, her younger siblings, and their mother. “I don't want to talk about it.”
My forehead rests against hers, trying to be comforting, but my body has way too many other ideas as she gnaws on her lower lip and her eyes stay focused on me. “You don't have to leave to escape him.”
“I just want so much more than this town, Logan. I can't become my mother.”
I smile and brush some of her unruly hair out of her eyes. “That will never happen.”
“I’m terrified it will. I think that's why I won't give into Shane.”
I pull my forehead from hers and look at her, confused and trying to decipher her statement. They’ve been officially dating for a year and a couple months. Seems to me she's given in.
Then it clicks.
“Maddie . . .”
She stands up, walking to the ledge of the porch, leaning forward on her arms. “I just can't seem to go there. What if I get knocked up in high school just like my mother? It would all be over.”
I clear my throat, so fucking uncomfortable with this conversation. I’m stalling until I figure out some words to say.
I know Shane got laid before he started dating Maddie. Guys talk. I’ve had sex with a few chicks, just passing the time. But Maddie and I don't really talk about this shit.
And if anyone, including my brother, ever talked about her that way, I’d put their head through the wall.
So, when it comes to Maddison James's sex life, I’m pretty clueless.
I climb off the stair and lean on the ledge with her. “Maddie, you have to do what's right for you.”
No fucking way I’m telling the girl of my dreams to fuck my brother.
“Shane doesn't see it that way. He's getting bored with me, Logan. I can tell.”
A single tear slides along her cheek, and I urge her up, my hands grasping her shoulders as I look into her eyes. “How could anyone be bored with you?”
“I’m not putting out. He's a senior about to graduate. and he’s dating a sophomore. He's going to stray if he hasn’t already. I know he will, and I don’t . . .” She pauses and bites her lip again.
“You don't what?”
My heart is pounding like crazy, my stomach in knots as she leans in closer, her nose brushing mine. “I’m not sure I care.”
Damn it. I should push her away. I should stop her, say something, but I don't.
Instead of doing any of that, as her lips meet mine, I fully embrace her. My hands slide along her sides and down to her hips, pulling her in close. Her arms wrap around my neck as our mouths intertwine, our tongues desperately seeking each other’s in a passionate, hungry duel.
And then, it all comes to a halt as a metaphoric bucket of cold water is thrown over us when I hear my brother's angry low growl. “What the fuck is this?”
We both release our grips and slowly turn to see Shane standing there, a furious scowl on his face.
“I . . . Shane . . .” Maddie is frozen in place. The need to rescue her, the one I’ve had since we met, kicks in.
I take a step forward, shielding her from my brooding brother. “I kissed her.”
I hear Maddie trying to speak, but I hold my hand up, silencing her.
Shane takes another step toward me, his slightly larger body standing in front of me. “Why?”
“You know why.”
It's no secret that I’ve been in love with Maddie for years, at least not from Shane. Yet he still went after her.
We managed to stay close, but when they went on their first official date, I thought my heart would explode with jealousy.
It’s been torture watching them together for the last year. But because he’s my brother, I swallowed the pain and anger.
“She's mine, goddamn it. You better keep you fucking hands and lips off her.” I can see his rage rising, his fists clenching at his sides.
If I were anyone else he would have laid into me, without question.
“I love her.”
I hear Maddie's soft gasp behind us, but I don't acknowledge it.
“So, do I. And I had the fucking balls to go after what I wanted.”
“You guys, stop.” Maddie walks between us, where she's been for so many years, whether she's known it or not. “Please don't fight.”
“Do you love him?” The question makes my tough-as-nails brother sound more vulnerable than I've ever heard.
“Shane . . .” It’s clear she’s unsure of where she was going with her reply.
“Answer me.”
Her eyes drift to me, sadness and uncertainty in them. She looks at Shane and nods her head. “Yes.” Her voice is a whisper as she weakly adds, “I love you both. I always have.”
“Well I don't fucking share, sweetheart. So, you're gonna have to pick. Which one of us do you want to be with?”
I want her to choose, but I hate the look of uncertain fear on her face. “Shane, back off. Give her a second to process it.”
He moves by her, his hand shoving my chest angrily. “Fuck you. What kind of man goes after his brother’s girl? Dad would be so disappointed.”
A growl bubbles up in my throat as I shove him back, his body colliding with the siding of the house. “Fuck. You.”
He pushes me back. “Pissed because it's true?”
“You guys, stop.” Maddie is pleading in the background, but this is between us now.
My fist lands against his cheek just as his body slams into mine, sending us through the old boards of the railing and off the porch.
Fucker.
His fist connects with my nose, a deafening crack ringing out.
I pummel him with my fists, and he lets loose with blow after blow until we’re both bleeding and broken and eventually pulled apart by mutual friends.
A trickle of blood oozes from his cheek as he turns to Maddie, who looks fucking terrified. His chest is heaving with rage. “Choose.”
I’m panting as my swollen right eye struggles to focus on her pretty face.
It’s all worth it when
I hear her sweet voice. “Logan. It’s always been Logan.”
I don't smile, even though I’m happier than words could explain, mostly because I know I’m losing my brother.
She's worth it.
Two
Maddie
“Hey, I gotta get going. Gotta go feed.”
I smile, my eyes still closed tightly, not wanting to open them and wake up from the beautiful dream, praying that last night was real.
I open only my right eye and see Logan's handsome face hovering above mine with his bright smile and light brown hair tousled from the night before. I open my other eye to fully take in the whole picture of his toned, naked torso and strong arms holding him up over my body so his full weight won’t crush me. My finger lazily traces over the sexy tattoo swirling over the muscle of his bicep, following the sinewy vein that’s bulging from pulled tight skin.
Last night was real.
Logan and I have been together since that horrible night at the party a year and a half ago. Everything has been perfect. He’d always been my best friend and my rock, and when he blurted out he loved me, everything just clicked in place for me.
I always knew he was attractive, but somehow, we’d never crossed that line. He dated a lot of other girls, so when Shane asked me out, I said yes. Shane was the hot, older guy I'd always had a juvenile crush on, but the feelings for him were different.
