Not for a Moment: One Moment, Book 3

by Toni J Strawn

  “That might work.” Tash still looked dubious.

  “Now you’re thinking,” Joshua yelled out encouragement. “Work together.”

  Jess’s attention had already skipped to the wall. She really wanted to attempt it, especially because it looked next to impossible.

  “Go on,” Joshua called out. “What have you got to lose?”

  Everything. If she couldn’t do it, Jayne and Tash would give up too. Jess refused to let that happen. Her mother wouldn’t have. Her mom would have taken to the wall with a chainsaw. That was how Jess needed to be. They needed to believe they could attempt the impossible.

  “Too easy.” Jess flashed a grin. “I thought this was going to be a challenge?”

  With a roaring war cry, she threw herself at the nine-foot wall.

  And kept trying until it was the end of the day and the light was fading. Tash and Jayne had departed, along with strict instructions on what time to pick her up on Saturday.

  Jess was muddy, sore, and pissed off. Thomas had been quiet—too scared to say anything after Jess had bitten his head off when he dared question the sanity of the girls’ competing.

  She’d been so close. Okay. Closer to the bottom than the top, but Jayne had mastered the ladder swing with her help, so that was something.

  It was only the wall that remained to be conquered.

  * * * * *

  Van checked his watch again. She was late. Damn it.

  He pulled back his shoulders, easing the tension that had built into a knot that sat at the base of his neck. He’d been looking forward to relieving it with Jess. But either she wanted to be here or she didn’t. Van refused to babysit a twenty-three-year-old woman. She had to commit to this.

  It didn’t help that he was already in a foul mood after calling his mother earlier when his conscience had prodded him into picking up the phone.

  “Hello?” It had taken an age for his mom to answer. She sounded so much older, her voice thinner somehow. Less real. It was hard to reconcile with the woman who’d bellowed at her two boys from clear across the yard when he’d been growing up.

  “Hey.” He had swallowed back the bitter taste of despair that stuck in his throat.

  “Van?” A hint of pleasure had sparked in her voice. “I’m glad you called.”

  “How have you been?”

  “Good. I’m good. Actually…” Her voice had faltered. “I’ve been waiting for you to call. I need to tell you…I’m moving into a home.”

  “What’s wrong?” Panic had spiked and Van’s stomach had clenched. He hadn’t wanted to think the worst but was expecting it. Still, he wasn’t ready for her to give up. He would never be ready.

  “All of your stuff is here,” she’d come back, the familiar sadness weighing heavy in her voice. “And Ryan’s… I need you to go through things.”

  Ryan’s things. Van had rubbed at his chest. To sift through the memories of the life they used to have—a better life—and pack them away.

  “I’m finished here in a few weeks,” he’d told her. “I’m coming home then.”

  “Good. Yes. That would be good.” His mom had paused. “I’ve missed you, Van,” she said, her voice cracking. “There are things I need to tell you.”

  Van had closed his eyes, feeling like she was saying good-bye. “I miss you too.”

  Van missed who his mother used to be. Who he used to be, before Ryan’s death had stolen his family from him. He always felt worse after talking to her. Guilty. He’d promised to call her when he was on his way. Home.

  He didn’t want to go back. He wanted to stay here. With Jess.

  Van had rocked back in his chair, hit with the overpowering need to see her. Waiting for the clock to tick around to eight o’clock.

  When she’d failed to show, Van had gone back to typing up his notes, bashing the laptop keys so hard the letters kept doubling up.

  It was well after eight when Jess knocked at the door.

  “You’re late.” Van opened it with a scowl.

  “Sorry.” Jess waltzed inside, not looking sorry at all. She grimaced at the look on his face. “I had to walk and it took me longer than I thought.”

  Van took an involuntary step back as he looked at her properly for the first time. “What the hell have you been doing?” His temper disappeared and he tipped her face to the side, examining the bruise on her cheek.

  “Nothing.” Her face grew hot under his fingertips, stained with red. “I’m just a bit stiff from the other day when we were sparring.”

  Van frowned, thinking back over their time in the gym. He couldn’t account for the bruise, but things had gotten a little out of hand when they’d returned to the apartment, so he couldn’t discount it either. He cleared his throat.

  “You shouldn’t be, unless you didn’t do any exercises yesterday,” he said. Her cheeks grew even brighter. “Damn it, Jess, you know you need to stretch it out, especially after using muscles you haven’t before.”

  “I hardly lay around,” she spluttered.

  “What did you do then?”

  Jess took a deep breath, then shook her head. “None of your business.” She stuck her nose in the air. “It wasn’t your day yesterday. And even if I did tell you, it wouldn’t be right. Too much. Too little. It’s always my fault when the results don’t work out how you want them.”

  Van rubbed at his forehead, the beginnings of a headache forming. Ultimately, he was doing this for Jess, but she was hell-bent on bringing out the worst in him.

  “What are you talking about?” He tried to remain patient.

  “I know how you work. Do this. Do that. Oh, you’re not fixed? Well it’s obviously because you didn’t do your exercises. Or, maybe you overdid them—”

  “Don’t put your bullshit on me, Jess.” Van wasn’t in the mood for this. The conversation with his mom had been draining enough—guilt always bubbled close to the surface. He didn’t need that from Jess. For her. For him. For them.

  He stalked closer, continuing to stare her down. A spark flared to life in her eyes, the embers licking out to catch the tinder of his own desire. His breath came faster, mingling with hers, anger and frustration melting away until there was nothing left but lust. Want. Need.

  Van lunged across those last few inches and claimed Jess’s mouth, pulling her against him, rubbing his aching cock into her belly. He’d been hard since the moment he opened the door and saw her there.

  What was she doing to him?

  Jess moved her hands up to tangle in his hair. She melted into him, offering her mouth to him as he thrust his tongue inside. Van dug his fingers into the soft flesh of her ass in his attempt to get closer still. She let out a low groan and it was only because he wasn’t sure whether it was pleasure or pain that Van pulled back, his breath sounding harshly in his ears, his blood pounding. Jess followed him across the space he had made, settling herself back against his body. A perfect fit. She sucked his bottom lip into her mouth and pulled on it, sending an arch of pleasure straight to his crotch. His cock was a painful ache as he ground his hips into her.

  He pulled back with a groan. No. He was the one who was controlling this. He couldn’t let Jess get her own way. But she looked so gorgeous. Her tongue peeked out of her mouth, teeth nibbling on that bottom lip as she fought against a smug little smile. It was beyond sexy.

  And distracting. He wanted Jess. But he wanted to help her too. And to do that, he needed to seize her attention with more than carnal coupling, founded on base emotions. Lust. Hunger. Desire. They needed to share an experience. Pedestrian sex wasn’t going to cut it.

  Hell, Van didn’t want to just seize her attention—he wanted to own it. Van was drawn to her energy and it fed his desire like a drug. He wanted her. And that was a dangerous thing, because right now, having Jess would come first, with the program he needed her for a far-d
istant second.

  And after talking to his mom, he knew that would only lead to disaster.

  Still, physiotherapy came in handy for more things than rehabilitation and Van knew all the tricks of the trade. He had to maintain control—difficult to do when Jess sent his blood thundering through his veins, his cock throbbing, hormones howling for him to claim her.

  Jess wriggled against him. “Is this part of my session today?” Her eyes were glazed, her breath coming hard, and she was seconds from coming back in for the kiss that would end all of Van’s resistance.

  Stepping away was the hardest thing Van had to do, but the grip on his control was too weak to give it up right now.

  “No. You obviously have excess energy to burn,” he said, backing toward the door, putting distance between them. “You’re going back in the ring.”

  Chapter Twelve

  The top came off the champagne bottle with a pop that made Jess jump.

  Exhausted, she slumped onto the couch with the grace of a hippo, watching Van fill two glasses. He moved with practiced economy. Fluid grace. Yummy. She could have sat there eating him with her eyes all day.

  She winced as her shoulder rubbed against the cushion. She had a couple more bruises to add to her collection after her sparring effort today. Mind you, Van had a few too. She grinned. Perking up a little. She loved the fact he’d donned gloves and gone up against her at the end. Jess had thought he’d go easy on her. He hadn’t.

  It was just as well Cole had left for Buffalo. He’d have a blue fit if he saw her.

  Van finished pouring and handed Jess a glass.

  “To the winner.” He grinned, chinking his flute against hers.

  Jess raised a brow. “And who was that?” she asked, leaning back in her seat. He sat beside her, resting his ankle against his knee as he settled himself into the corner.

  “Boxing was the winner on the day.”

  Jess spluttered as the bubbles went up her nose. “Ha ha. I could’ve kicked your ass.”

  “Then you should have,” Van said smugly.

  “Next time,” Jess promised. Van was too strong, too agile, too everything for her to have a hope against him, and they both knew it. But it didn’t mean she would stop trying. “On a serious note, I would like to have a proper go at boxing one day. Maybe someone more my size. And ability.”

  “I think you’d do well.” Van leaned forward, his expression thoughtful. “And I’d pay good money to watch the match.” He grinned wickedly.

  “So, you’d let me do that?” She tilted her head sideways and gave Van a surprised look.

  “It’s not about letting you. You need more training, sure. But there’s no reason why you can’t do it.”

  Jess tipped her glass against his. “To boxing, then.”

  “To boxing.”

  Jess took a sip, a glow warming her belly. And it wasn’t the bubbles that made her feel lightheaded. It was Van. All the things she’d thought about him…he was proving wrong. He didn’t tell her no. He didn’t tell her how to do things. He was allowing her to do stuff Jess would never have thought of attempting. No one else at the clinic would have let her anywhere near a boxing ring. Yet she’d just demonstrated she could do it. That she was good at it.

  And it was because of Van. Jess’s chest tightened and she shifted restlessly against him.

  He’d empowered her to achieve more in the last week than she had in the last year of her rebellion. She couldn’t have done it without him in her life. And she liked him being there. A little too much.

  He was just doing his job, she reminded herself. While he might enjoy the sexual aspect of their relationship, he still saw her as a knee injury first. Jess second. Besides which, he’d made it more than clear he didn’t want anyone to depend on him. Chances were, she was one of many in a long line of women Van took a special interest in at each of the clinics he’d visited.

  It was good Van was leaving soon. Jess took a sip of wine to hide the jolt of dismay that thought gave her. She didn’t want to rely on him to make her feel good. She could take care of herself, even if having Van around made it that much easier.

  “So, is it my turn yet?” She transferred her glass to the other hand and made a show of looking at her nonexistent watch.

  Van smirked. “Not until the champagne is finished.”

  Jess took a huge gulp of her drink.

  “No cheating,” he warned. “I haven’t finished our session yet.”

  “Oh?”

  “Yes. Champagne and the taste of a woman is delicious. Very therapeutic.” Van’s expression was a slow smolder that had slices of pleasure sliding over Jess’s skin.

  She licked her lips. “Does it go with other things, too?” She let her gaze slide down his chest, lingering on the sizeable bulge in his pants.

  Wine sloshed over Van’s fingers. Jess chuckled, but her laughter died in her throat when he sucked the liquid off his skin. She pouted. He was stealing her fun.

  Van pulled her against him, so her back was to his chest. The warmth of his breath stirred the hair at her neck. His thumb stroked across her stomach through the fabric of her shirt and a rush of desire flared low in Jess’s belly.

  She relaxed back into the curve of his shoulder, angling her neck so he could access the sensitive skin below her ear. He nuzzled into her, sparks of pleasure dancing through her veins as his tongue licked at her throat. He got busy lifting her shirt up past her breasts, passing her glass from one hand to the other. He peeled off her top and let it drop to the floor.

  Van shifted positions, settling on the very edge of the seat so Jess lay across his lap, supported by the padded couch.

  “Here, hold this.” He handed off his glass to her so both her hands were full. Jess was stuck. She couldn’t move without spilling champagne all over herself.

  Van took full advantage. He pushed her bra down, baring her breasts, while Jess tried to hold the drinks steady. A prickle of heat swept across her chest, up her neck to envelope her cheeks, her hips shifting restlessly as a familiar ache of need began to build in her sex. Van dipped his fingers into his glass and Jess jumped as he rubbed the cold, bubbling liquid over her breasts. She started shaking, drops of liquid spattering on her belly. It felt ice cold against her fevered skin.

  “Easy,” Van soothed. He relented and placed the glasses on the coffee table. Then his attention ricocheted back to Jess. She let out a gasp as he leaned forward and sucked at the moisture on her breasts with deep, lip-smacking noises.

  Hot and cold. The heat of his mouth was intense, quivers of pleasure spearing straight to her panties, engorging her sex so that even tiny movements created a delicious rub.

  “Mmm. That tastes good.” He burrowed his arm under her neck and the next moment Jess’s legs went from under her as he scooped her into his arms. “Bring the wine,” Van ordered, dipping her down so she could grasp the nearest glass.

  It was only ten short steps to Van’s bed. He let her down and she slid against his body until her feet rested on the floor. She put the glass on the bedside table as he pulled at the waistband of her pants, impatiently pushing them past her hips, along with her panties.

  Then it was his turn. Jess unhooked her bra and let it fall before climbing up on the bed to watch him undress. She salivated, fingers gripped together as Van’s body was revealed, inch by tantalizing inch.

  He brushed back a lock of her hair. That was all it took. Jess pulled him forward, sending him sprawling across the bed, slamming into her. The tension released as his arms tangled with hers, skin sliding against skin as he struggled to right himself.

  “Oh. You’ll pay for that,” he promised with a low, sexy laugh.

  “Yes. Please. Make me pay.” Jess tried to tug him back to her.

  “Behave,” he warned, twisting out of her way. “And stay still.”

  Jess ha
uled herself up on the pillows. Van dipped his fingers back into the champagne flute and started at one nipple. He drew a V with the liquid so it went down to her belly button and back up to her other breast.

  “V for Van,” he murmured. “I’ve marked you as mine.

  Jess’s heart fluttered, wishing it were true, even as her mind created fifty reasons why it couldn’t be. Shouldn’t be. Her uncertainty dissolved into pleasure as Van delivered heated kisses that chased the trail of wetness as it dribbled down her stomach, into her navel and on, slowly licking at her thighs.

  Wherever the champagne went, so did Van. He slid his hands around the tops of her calves, pulling her legs apart as his thumbs stroked the sensitive skin around her knees, kissing and licking his way down to her ankles. His hair tickled her shins. His hands inched up to stroke her thighs and Jess gave herself to the feel of his lips nuzzling her flesh while his hands grew more insistent, opening her farther.

  Tantalizing, teasing, Van rose back up to swirl his fingers into the champagne. He brought it to her lips, wet and dripping. Jess flicked the tip of her tongue around the pad of his forefinger and drew it into her mouth in a long, sensuous pull. Van swayed against her. His body tensed as he let her suck at his finger for a moment then drew it out again.

  Before she could reach for him, he picked up the glass and tipped it back, filling his mouth. He dipped back down to claim her breasts. Mouth-warmed liquid spilled over her nipples to run in rivulets down her belly, across her sides. Van sucked at her stomach, his hands stroking, lower and lower. Jess writhed beneath him as his fingers came to rest below her pussy. She was hyper-aware of how close his thumb was to her wet, throbbing clit.

  She didn’t know which to concentrate on first as the sensations jumbled together, moisture pooling at her thighs, coating his fingers. She stifled a cry as his thumb circled her labia, finding the ache at the very center of her. He slid inside effortlessly.

  There was no more time for thought. His lips were still on her belly, his thumb twisting to curl and hit the right spot. The molten coil inside Jess twisted tight, pressure building hard and fast.