Her Battle-Scarred Knight

by Meriel Fuller

  ‘Hugh is at my parents’ castle, near Winchester,’ Giseux explained. ‘His sickness began as we waited for the ships to bring us back to England. He is very ill, sometimes delirious with fever, but always, always, asking for you.’

  Brianna placed her palms flat over her face, physically trying to stop the tears from running down, emotion clawing in her belly. If only she’d known this morning, she would be with Hugh by now. ‘Then why didn’t you tell me?’ she blurted out, her voice holding the sting of accusation, ‘Why didn’t you tell me who you were this morning, why you were here?’ She flung herself into the chair opposite him, perching on the edge, scuffed leather boots poking out from beneath her sagging hemline.

  ‘If I remember rightly, it was you who denied all knowledge of Brianna of Sefanoc,’ he replied scornfully. ‘If you hadn’t, we would be with him now.’

  ‘Then let’s go!’ She sprang out of the seat, headed towards the solar. ‘All I need is my cloak.’

  Giseux’s deep voice halted her nimble stride. ‘Lady, if you think I’m travelling anywhere tonight, then think again. I need food and I need some sleep before I climb into that saddle once more.’

  ‘But Hugh…?’

  ‘…is in safe hands,’ he finished the sentence for her. He was reluctant to point out that if Hugh were dead now, then one night would make no difference. ‘We’ll ride on the morrow, in daylight. It’ll be safer and we’ll be able to see our way, which will make the journey quicker.’

  Brianna frowned, spinning back on the ball of one foot to face him, bridling beneath his authoritative manner, his swift decision-making. ‘That may be so, my lord, but I wish to see my brother now.’ Who did he think he was, to give her orders so? She was used to making up her own mind, forging her own decisions; after her marriage to Walter, she had promised herself that, at least. ‘I thank you, my lord, for bringing the message about my brother; you are welcome to some food and to spend the night here.’ Her tone was formal, dismissive. ‘I will fetch you something to eat right now.’

  ‘Hold.’ As she passed his chair, he snagged her hand in one large chainmail glove. The creased leather on the underside pressed into her palm.

  ‘Let me go.’ Brianna made an effort to deliver the words calmly, waiting for the familiar crawl of fear in her chest, bracing her body against the inevitable sickening panic she experienced when any man came too close. Her pulse skipped, her heart rate accelerating, but not in any way she remembered. She frowned; something was not right.

  ‘What are you going to do?’ he asked. His voice had a lilting, liquid quality.

  ‘I told you, to fetch some food.’ She tugged at her hand; his strong fingers tightened. Annoyed, she pressed her lips together, staring steadfastly away from his penetrating gaze.

  ‘You feed me lies, my lady, I can see it in your face,’ his silky tones accused her. ‘You’re planning to go to him, aren’t you? Whether I agree to accompany you or not.’

  ‘It’s none of your business.’

  ‘It is my business to deliver you safely. Do you think Hugh would ever forgive me if some harm came to you on the journey? He asked me to escort you and escort you I will.’ He dropped her hand.

  ‘Then go with me now.’ She cradled her released fingers, missing the warmth of his touch. What was the matter with her?

  ‘It’s not possible,’ Giseux replied firmly, steel threading his voice. Since when had women become so outspoken? He could travel if he wanted to; he could ride for days on an empty stomach with little sleep, but something in her manner made him want to resist, to squash her a little.

  ‘All right, we’ll leave tomorrow,’ she replied huffily, flouncing off to the kitchen. Leaning back in the chair, Giseux smiled. He suspected that he would have a battle on his hands, a battle that he would inevitably win. Oddly, he relished the thought.

  Chapter Three

  ‘Oh, my lady, what in Heaven’s name are we going to feed him?’ Alys knotted her fingers together endlessly, running helpless eyes along the wide empty shelves lining the kitchen.

  ‘Nothing, if I had my way.’ Brianna braced her hands flat against the well-scrubbed planks of the kitchen table, trying to assemble her angry, scattered thoughts. Her eyes snapped over to Alys, fiery blue. ‘The man’s a complete oaf! Did you hear what he said to me? Hugh’s alive and he refuses to take me to him! He wants to wait…wait until tomorrow morning. Can you believe it?’

  Alys hurried over to her, plucked at Brianna’s sleeve. ‘Keep your voice down, he’ll hear you!’ The thin skin of her face stretched over high cheekbones, mottled pink. She darted a nervous glance towards the open kitchen door.

  ‘What do I care?’ Brianna pushed her body upright, whipping around to face the door, wanting Giseux to burst through, wanting to challenge him. ‘He knows what I think.’

  ‘My lady, calm down,’ Alys pleaded, patting feebly at Brianna’s arm. ‘Come, let’s fetch him some food—what about the stew?’

  Alys’s question forced her mind to concentrate. She considered the stew that she and her maidservant had been eking out for the last week: tough chicken legs occasionally enlivened with a few chewy winter greens. ‘Nay, too good for him,’ she pronounced, instead extracting a dry heel of bread from an earthenware pot, plonking it on a pewter plate. ‘There, that should do.’

  ‘He’s a lord, Brianna,’ Alys whispered, ‘a nobleman. We can’t feed him on stale bread.’

  ‘I suppose he could have some cheese,’ Brianna conceded, grudgingly. She unwrapped a long piece of damp muslin from a round of soft cheese, fresh and crumbly.

  ‘And some mead.’ Alys dipped a pewter tankard into an iron-girded cask of the amber liquid, setting it down on the tray next to the plate.

  ‘Shall I take it?’ the maidservant offered reluctantly.

  Brianna smiled. ‘Nay, let me. And he’d better appreciate it.’

  Alys raised her eyes to Heaven.

  Shouldering her way awkwardly back through the door to the great hall, carrying the tray, Brianna decided her main aim was to encourage Giseux, after he had eaten, to retire for the night. Alys had already prepared the guest chamber, accessed by a spiral flight of stairs from the entrance hall. Once he was asleep, it would leave the way clear for her to saddle up her horse and ride to Winchester.

  Giseux’s legs gleamed in their metallic skin, his bulging calf muscles clearly visible beneath the chainmail as Brianna advanced towards the chair. He’d removed his chainmail gloves and they lay on the floor. She crashed the tray down ungratefully on the rickety, three-legged table at his elbow. ‘Here you are, my lord.’ Her bravado quailed as his eyes, midnight-fringed, devoured her with a single sweep.

  ‘What did those men want with you this morning?’ he demanded, ignoring the pewter plate at his side.

  ‘I…er…’ She hesitated, sweeping over to the shutters, checking the latches were secure, away from his heated perusal.

  ‘What did they want with you?’ Her spine shivered beneath the low rumble of his voice.

  The metal hasp of the shutters felt cool beneath her fingers; she yearned to press her flaming face against the solid wood, to regain some solidity, some stability in her current situation.

  ‘Count John’s men?’ Brianna tried to keep her voice light, even. She couldn’t allow this man to know how much their beating had affected her. Taking a deep, shaky breath, she moved back to the fireside, perched tentatively in the seat opposite Giseux.

  He bit into a hunk of bread, chewing slowly, silent.

  Brianna shifted uncomfortably, stared at the floor, knowing he was waiting for an answer. ‘Count John wants me to marry one of his noblemen, so that Sefanoc comes within his jurisdiction. He sent his soldiers to persuade me.’

  ‘Their methods of persuasion leave a lot to be desired,’ he murmured, taking a swig of mead, running the tip of his tongue along the generous curve of his bottom lip to catch a wayward drip.

  Brianna touched one finger to her throbbing jaw. ‘That’s
why bringing Hugh home to Sefanoc is so important,’ she offered, tentatively. ‘When Count John sees he’s alive, well, then they’ll stop tormenting me.’

  ‘Then it’s fortunate he is home.’ Giseux steepled his fingers in front of his chest. ‘Otherwise you might have ended up in a marriage against your will.’

  Her expression was bleak. ‘It would never happen; I told you before, I would rather die than have that happen again.’

  His eyes flicked up at her final word; she clapped her hands to her mouth, startled, dismayed at her stupid mistake. Again. The word that gave away her past.

  ‘Again?’ Giseux queried, adjusting his position to lean forwards, elbows resting on his knees.

  She sprang from her seat, mouth trembling, flustered, sweat clagging her palms. ‘You need to finish your meal,’ she announced briskly, ‘and I must change out of these clothes. Please excuse me.’

  So that was it, Giseux mused idly, as he watched the flick of her skirt, the shining coin of her hair disappear through a door at the end of the great hall. She had been married before, and not happily, judging from her reaction to his question. Where was her husband now? Had she finished him off with her crossbow, with a swipe from the knife at her belt? His lips twitched at the thought—she was perfectly capable. In fact, he doubted he had met another woman who fought with such drive, such ferocity, to hold on to the things she held most dear. It appeared she was paying a high price.

  * * *

  Seizing the mud-encrusted hem of her loose peasant gown, Brianna struggled with the coarse material to pull it over her head. Why, why on earth had she said such a stupid thing? And to him, of all people: a complete stranger! Blood bolted through her veins, rattling her; she forced herself to breathe more slowly, to calm down. The sooner she was away from him, the better. Leaving her chemise and woollen stockings on, and still wearing her stout leather boots, Brianna moved to the oak coffer at the foot of the bed. The carved lid opened with a protesting creak as she riffled inside. She only had two suitable gowns and one, she knew, had a long rip along a seam that she had been meaning to repair. The green wool gown was presentable, if a little threadbare. She settled the material over her head, smelling the dried lavender that Alys placed in the oak coffers every year to keep the clothes sweet. As the folds fell down about her shoulders, the wool prickled a little against her linen chemise, damp from her earlier dunking.

  Pushing her head through the round slash neck, her fingers brushed against the silver embroidery that decorated the collar, the design raised, intricate. Her mother had done this, her beautiful mother who had spent many hours working her fine needlework on all the family’s clothes. Brianna could see her now, sitting by the south window in the solar, the bright sunlight picking up the shining thread on her lap, the gold filaments in her burnished hair. Her breath emerged in a long, stuttering sigh. How she wished her parents could be here now, instead of succumbing to that horrendous, debilitating illness. They would be proud of her, she hoped, proud of the way she had kept the estate going in Hugh’s absence, proud of the way she had scrimped and saved, so that there was something of worth, something of value for him to come home to. How could that man be so insensitive as to keep her from her brother, when she had waited for so long for him to return?

  She smoothed the skirts of the gown down over her thighs, shaking out the creases and bringing in the waist with a woven girdle that settled over her slim hips. The woodenness of her fingers vexed her as she fumbled with the intricate ties of the belt. She placed her knife-belt and cloak across the bed, not wanting to alert Giseux’s suspicions if she carried them out to the great hall now. Soon enough she and Alys would have him settled in the guest chamber and she would be able to slip away. Knotting her long braids together to form a loose bun, she jabbed the vibrant mass with several long hairpins in an effort to secure it, before covering her head with a gauzy veil. This she jammed into place with a golden circlet, the only one she hadn’t sold, the metal cold and tight against her forehead.

  She padded on silent feet towards the door, the hem of her gown a muffled whisper against the wide elm floorboards. Clicking the latch open, Brianna drew her spine up, preparing to face her rescuer once more.

  Giseux’s substantial frame spread out from the chair, his whole body polished in the light of the feeble fire. One arm hung out over the armrest, strong, tapered fingers suspended in mid-air.

  He was asleep.

  A curious flickering curled around her stomach, subtle, delicious, as she studied the man. For the first time she noticed the grey shadows beneath his eyes, hollows of smudged ash, crinkled lines fanning out from the corners. A hot, heavy sensation speared her feet to the floor; it was as if she were mesmerised. He looked uncomfortable, his big frame wedged into the narrow corner of the chair, and, with a rush of realisation, Brianna knew she should have offered him some of her brother’s clothes. Hugh could never wait to dispense with his armour once he arrived home, always complaining how intolerable it was.

  His chest rose and fell steadily, slowly, evidence of a deep sleep, the wool of his surcoat flattening taut over his chest and stomach, revealing the solid indentations of his muscles. He had loosened the leather laces that held together the slash neck of his hauberk; as the chainmail edges gaped, they revealed the strong, corded muscles of his neck, the tanned hollow of his throat. Brianna bit her lip; the temptation to touch, to test the honed perfection of his skin, was overwhelming. Her fingers burned with awareness.

  She twisted her hands together, agitated, trying to dispel the tantalising craving, annoyed by her strange reaction to him. Was she in her right mind? Had the attack today left her so befuddled that she had forgotten her lonely path in life? Remember Walter, she told herself sternly, remember Walter controlling her to the point where she had wanted to scream in frustration, trapped in that bitter, loveless marriage. It had become his main amusement, deciding what she ate, what she wore, what she did all day, so that at some point in that hideous time, she truly believed she was losing the ability to think for herself. And she was not about to let that happen again.

  Whisking back to her chamber, Brianna snatched up her cloak and knife-belt from the bed. Her mind rattled with details; she had to seize her chance to travel to Winchester now, whilst Giseux slept. As she tiptoed past him, a sudden nausea roiled in her belly at her daring and she trembled with the horrible notion of him leaping up suddenly, catching her red-handed. He could not, must not, catch her. She kept her gaze pinned to the door at the far end of the great hall, taking deliberate, considered steps, picking up her hem so she didn’t trip. Every muscle in her body strained, held taut in the moment, alert to the slightest movement, the slightest sound from the chair. After what seemed like an eternity, her hand lifted the latch and she slipped into the entrance hall like a ghost, closing the door behind her. Her suppressed breath released; she sagged against the wall in relief.

  Alys emerged from the stair that led to the guest chamber above the kitchens, eyes wide in her pale, wizened face. ‘My lady? What’s happening?’ she whispered, frowning at Brianna’s change of clothes, her cloak.

  ‘Shh.’ Brianna put a finger to her lips, seizing the maidservant by the hand and pulling her through the main entrance door, out, out into the frosty air, down the steps, down to the vaulted stables below the first floor. The smell of crushed straw, of faint, stale horse filled the air.

  ‘Oh, mistress, nay, you cannot!’ In the white slant of moonlight that poured through the archway into the stables, Alys brought her gnarled, arthritic hands to sunken cheeks when Brianna told her of her plans.

  ‘It’s the only way,’ Brianna announced briskly, heart knocking against her chest, the image of the big man sprawled upstairs, asleep, tripping dangerously around the edges of her consciousness.

  ‘At least let me come with you, mistress.’

  In the startling brightness of the moon, Alys suddenly looked old, her gaunt frame bent over with exhaustion. Guilt surged through B
rianna and she placed two hands on Alys’s shoulders. ‘Nay, Alys, I can’t ask you to do that. You’ve put up with so much from me, you need to rest now. Go to bed, sleep. Lord Giseux can take care of himself.’

  ‘But…?’

  ‘Winchester is not above twenty miles from here…I know the way.’ Well, most of it, Brianna added silently.

  ‘But how will you travel?’ Alys’s gaze swept the empty stable. ‘We have no horses left to ride.’

  Brianna grinned, the metal bosses on her cloak glinting in the dim light. ‘Aye, we don’t,’ she pointed out towards to fringes of the forest, where Giseux’s large destrier was patiently cropping the grass, the reins conveniently looped around a low branch, ‘but he does.’

  * * *

  It was the cold that finally woke him, digging into his bones like icy fingers, relentlessly, endlessly, so at last after a great deal of tossing and turning and trying to will his exhausted body back to sleep, Giseux reluctantly opened his eyes. The barest trickle of moonlight squeezed through the gaps in the long wooden shutters, enough to see by. The fire had burnt out, but not long ago, ashes smouldering dismally in the grate.

  The chair cradled his body at a stiff, unyielding angle, compressing his bones. His right hand had gone numb; he gritted his teeth, flexing his fingers as the blood returned with a painful prickling. Shaking off the shrouds of sleep, his mind jumped into action, remembering, remembering the task that Hugh had set him. He recalled the spark of determination in Lady Brianna’s eyes, the stubborn set of her mouth when he had informed her that they would not leave until morning.

  Propelling himself from the chair, he strode over to the door of the solar, wrenching the door open. In normal circumstances, he probably would have knocked, but up to this point everything about Lady Brianna had been anything but normal. He knew, he just knew, before he’d even looked at the bed and saw that the furs lay flat, unused, that she had gone. Little witch! He had offered to come to Sefanoc as a favour to Hugh; in reality it was turning out to be an ordeal.