by Toni Aleo
Looking over at my coach, I can see the disappointment in his eyes. He wanted Baylor to win.
“Thanks, Coach,” I say before heading to the locker room. As I pass everyone, they tap my shoulder and my shins, congratulating me. When Jace falls into step with me, he’s on the phone.
“Yeah, he kicked ass! I’m alternate. Right! Beast mode for sure. Hold on.”
He holds the phone out for me, so I tuck my glove and stick under my arm to take it. “Hello?”
“Way to go, bro!” Jude exclaims, and I nod.
“Thanks, man.”
“Way to show them who’s boss around there.”
“Yeah, it feels good.”
“Liar,” he says after a moment. “What, did you make her cry or something?”
“Bye, Jude,” I say, hanging up the phone and handing it to Jace.
“What?”
“Nothing,” I say, pushing the door open to look for Baylor. She isn’t at her locker, and I can’t find McCarthy. “Where’s McCarthy?”
Everyone looks up and around them, but then Shane stands up from by the shower. “I kicked him out of here. He tried to go in there when Baylor was in there.”
I nod. “Thanks, Shane.”
“No problem. She’s been in there for a minute longer than usual.”
I chew the inside of my cheek as Jace says, “She’s probably pissed. Let her be.”
“Yeah, just let her cool down. She pushed hard,” Markus says, falling down on the bench.
Dropping my gloves and stick, I take my helmet off and then head to the shower. Pushing the door open, steam escapes out, but I can’t see her. I can hear her though. It takes everything out of me not to go in there and bundle her up in my arms. Not only would she probably beat my face in, but I also don’t want to see her cry.
Girls crying gives me the willies.
Especially when I’m the reason they are crying.
“Moore, you good?”
Sucking in a deep breath, she doesn’t say anything, and I call her name again. Finally, she says, “Yeah, fine. Just finishing up. Gotta shave my legs.”
I smile. She’s too damn proud. Letting the door shut, I meet Shane’s eyes and he shrugs. “Good excuse.”
“Yeah, for sure,” I agree before sitting down to take my gear off. When she comes out, she passes by without looking at me but acts like nothing is wrong. As she combs out her hair, she jokes with the guys, teasing Markus for puking and also giving him shit for having to make her bed and fold her clothes. Chummy, those two have become and I would be jealous, but I can see it in her eyes, she’s completely beating herself up on the inside.
Shaking my head, I head into the showers to clean up. When I come out, she’s gone. I was hoping to talk to her, maybe even see if she liked the gift and note, but obviously that will have to wait.
“Sinclair, when you’re dressed, come see me, please.”
Nodding my head, I say, “Sure, Coach.”
He nods and then disappears into his office as Markus says, “Dinner?”
I shrug. “Depends if I can move after moving into my captain suite,” I say with a grin.
“I get to share it with ya, right? Like Jude and you did?” Jace asks, and I nod.
“Yeah, bro.”
“And Baylor will have the other room?” Markus asks, and I look over at him as I pull my shirt down.
“That’s the plan. Why? You got a thing for her?”
He holds his hands up, his face breaking into a grin. “Whoa, Jay, simple question. I don’t want her upstairs with the other juniors.”
I nod then, looking away as I pull my shorts up. “I agree, and she won’t be.”
Eyeing me, Markus says, “If you like her so much, why don’t you do something about it instead of walking around and pissing all over her, marking her as yours, without her knowing?”
Scoffing, I roll my eyes as Jace starts to laugh. “Yeah, Jay.”
“Fuck both of you, and keep your mouths shut,” I say before sliding my shoes on. “Jace, be ready to go in a few.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he says as I head into Coach’s office. When I enter, he looks up and shuts his phone off before laying it on the table.
“You did great today, Sinclair.”
I grin as I fall into the seat in front of his desk. “Thank you.”
“I wanted to let you know that you had the position all along. Even if you had bowed out ninth today, it was yours.”
“Really?”
“Yup, it was yours Saturday night when you carried my daughter home after she puked on you.”
I grin as I nod. “I’d do it for anyone.”
“I know. That’s why the choice was easy.”
“Well, thank you,” I say. “That means a lot coming from you.”
“It’s easy to say. You lead this group with ease, you are a force to be reckoned with, and I’m proud to have you as my captain.”
I’m a little stunned by that. Sometimes I don’t think he likes me, and it pleases me to hear him say that. “Thank you, sir.”
“Now since you are the captain, you need to find a way to get along with Moore and keep your brother in line.”
“No problem at all.”
“You think so?”
“I know so,” I say confidently.
He grins. “Well, good. I tried to talk to my headstrong, bitter, sore-losing daughter, and she told me to get out of her face. Her words. So I did, but maybe you can talk to her.” I swallow loudly and he laughs. “Scared, eh?”
I laugh with him. “Nothing scares me, Coach.”
He holds my gaze as he nods. He is a very intimidating man, almost like my dad. But while my dad is very vicious, I don’t feel that way about Coach. He’s a stand-up guy who wants my team to win but also wants his daughter to succeed. I want the same thing.
“I’ll admit I’m scared of her, Sinclair. She’s bullheaded as hell.”
I nod. “I don’t disagree with you, sir, but I know how to handle her.”
Leaning on the desk, he grins at me. “I don’t even think she knows how to handle herself.”
Ain’t that the damn truth.
“But on with you. She’s on the rink.”
“Thank you, sir,” I say before standing and heading out of his office. Jace is waiting for me when I enter the locker room like I had asked him to. “Give me a few,” I say, and he makes a face.
“Why?”
“Need to take care of something.”
“Ugh!” he complains like the child he is. Then he says, “Fine, I’m gonna go with Markus to the coffee shop.”
“Okay,” I say before pushing through the door and heading to the rink. I find her sitting on the bench as the Zamboni runs along the ice. She has her legs pulled up into her chest, her arms hanging loosely around them as she watches the Zamboni go back and forth on the ice. I know she sees me, but she won’t even recognize that. I have no reason for why that bothers me. Maybe it’s my pride, I don’t know, but soon I’m closing the distance between us. I sit on the bench beside her, but she doesn’t move or say anything. Minutes pass and it’s almost like she’s a statue. But when I look at her, she swallows hard as I say, “Good job out there, Moore.”
Drawing a breath in through her nose, she lets her knees drop before running her hands down her legs. She’s wearing shorts and tee, her hair still wet from the shower, and I worry that she’ll get sick from sitting in the cold, but I doubt this is the first time she’s done this.
Or will be the last.
“Yeah, good job to you also.”
“Thank you.”
“Guess the real winner won, eh?”
“You outlasted forty-three dudes, Baylor. That’s nothing to turn your nose up at. You’re a winner just as much as I am.”
Looking at me, she glares as she shakes her head. “I had one goal and that was to beat you, and I didn’t. So I’m not a winner.”
“No, you didn’t beat me,” I say. And I understand her an
ger, I understand the way she feels. It’s the same thing I felt when Jude went into the draft. I was bitter and jealous, but still I knew my chance was coming, I knew that I’d get there. She’s acting like it’s over. “You are still amazing, Baylor. You are still going to go far.”
“But I didn’t beat you. You were public enemy number one, and I failed.”
She then gets up and rushes by me. Rolling my eyes, I stand up, and of course, I chase after her.
“Baylor, stop. I’m talking to you.”
“Go away.”
“No, I’m talking to you.”
“Fuck off, Sinclair!” she yells back at me with tears threatening to fall.
Reaching out, I take ahold of her wrist and whip her around to look at me. Her nostrils are flaring, her eyes are dark with anger, and her breathing is labored, but I don’t care. She’s acting like a baby, and I won’t deal with it. She pulls her arm free and we lock gazes, my breathing matching hers. She makes me so fucking mad.
“No, listen to me. So you didn’t get the position, it’s not that big of a deal. Stop acting like a fucking crybaby and man up!”
“You have no clue what you are saying. You don’t know me, you don’t know my situation, you know nothing. So just shut up!”
“Because you won’t allow me to know. I came in here trying to talk to you, to make it better—”
“I don’t need you to make it better because you can’t! You don’t know what it’s like to look my father in the eyes after he’s put all his time and effort in making me the best. He gave up his dreams for me, and then I failed him. He didn’t raise a fucking loser, Jayden. He raised a winner!”
“You didn’t get the captain position! I highly doubt that qualifies as failing!”
“It is, because it was the missing piece to get me to where I want to go. I needed the leadership, but instead I allowed you to get into my fucking head and mess me all up.”
“What?” I ask incredulously. Is she blaming me?
“Nothing! Don’t worry about it, and get away from me.”
“No,” I say, taking her arm to keep her from walking away. “You didn’t get captain, Baylor, but you are still an alternate. And who cares about titles? It matters about your performance, and Baylor, you got that in the bag.”
“No, I don’t! Because in the end, if they are gonna choose someone to go in, it’s gonna be you!”
Glaring at her, I don’t understand her way of thinking. “There are two hundred spots in every draft. I’m sure there is enough room for both of us. They took three from this school last year.”
She shakes her head and says, “And they didn’t take you. Which means I had to be better than you to get in.”
Stopping, I hold her gaze. That was a low blow, superlow, but she doesn’t mean it. Her lip is wobbling and her eyes are wide, almost like she didn’t want to say that.
“Do you really mean that?” I ask, but her stubborn ass won’t answer me. She’s just staring at me, her eyes watering while her lip wobbles. “Are you trying to push me away here? Is that what that was?”
“You know all about that, don’t you,” she snaps. “You’re great at making people feel like rejected losers.”
I shake my head before letting out a breath. I’m trying to keep my cool, but man, she is trying me here.
“Man, what happen to letting that go? To forgiving me?”
Her lip curls up as she glares. “I don’t like you.”
“That’s your answer?” I ask, and then I laugh. “You know what, Baylor?” I say sharply. “You say I’m the enemy, but really, you’re the enemy. You are your own worst enemy, and it’s fucking insane. You’re gonna bring yourself so far down, gonna push away so many people, that you’re gonna be left alone with no one to bring you back up.”
“I don’t need anyone to pick me up,” she growls back at me. “Especially not you.”
Taking a step closer to her, I hold her gaze. I try to ignore how hot she looks, how beautiful the hazel color of her eyes is, but it’s hard. Yeah, she pisses me off and she makes me crazy, but she does it while driving me wild with lust. I hate the way she makes me feel, but then I love it. She almost makes me feel like I’m bipolar and my sanity is nowhere in sight. I just don’t understand it. While she is sitting here, screaming at me, I should be pissed, screaming back, but I want to kiss her.
I want nothing more than to give that mouth something else to do.
Glancing up from her glossed-up red mouth, I look deep into her eyes and shake my head. “You know, I don’t doubt you. I bet you wish I’d go away.”
“I do. Just leave me alone.”
“I’m not going anywhere, though,” I say sharply. “You’ll have to give me a good reason to. Until then, I’m not moving. I’m gonna be in your face and make you see that I am good for you.”
“A good reason? Here is one: I don’t like you!”
“That’s a fucking lie, and you know it,” I say automatically, and then her teeth are sinking into her lip before she looks away, sucking in a breath through her nose. “Try again.”
“Fuck off, Jayden.”
I smile because I’m breaking down walls. She didn’t say Sinclair this time. She said my name, and she said it as a breath.
“No, because you know I’m right. You can’t stand me because I make you feel something more than just winning. You’re not mad because you lost, or even that you disappointed your dad—maybe at first. But now, you’re mad because you’re happy for me, because you knew that I deserved the position. You’re just too proud to admit it.”
Looking up at me, she glares, the little spot above her nose, between her brows, scrunching up while her mouth drops. But her eyes tell the truth. I’m dead-on right. “You are delusional.”
“No, I’m right. And the thing is, I couldn’t even be happy I won because I was worried about you. I wanted you to win, Baylor, but I knew if I let you, you’d skin me alive.”
Looking away, she shakes her head. “Just go away.”
“No. Stop pushing me away.”
“No, I can’t, Just go!” she yells, and I shake my head.
“Look at me,” I say, but she doesn’t. I fully expect her to move away when I take another step toward her, closing the distance between us, but she doesn’t. She stands there, sucking in breath after breath, and it’s honestly killing me. Taking my chances, I lift her chin with my index finger until her eyes meet mine. They are full of anger, remorse, and lust.
They are downright sinful.
“I can’t go away, Baylor,” I whisper. “I’ve tried. I can’t.”
Her eyes are wide, locked with mine, and she looks just so damn beautiful. “Please.”
“Please, what?” I ask, my brows coming together.
“Please, just go away.”
“Do you really want that?”
She doesn’t answer for a long time. My eyes are searching hers for any sign that she wants me. I can see it, but I need to hear her say it.
But then she whispers, “Yes, you freak me the fuck out.”
I smile; she’s so cute when she’s vulnerable.
“Good, because you freak me out too,” I whisper back.
Then I take another chance.
I drop my mouth to hers.
And I pray she doesn’t punch me in the dick.
I saw it coming, I did, but in my twisted fucked-up brain, I didn’t believe that he’d do it.
And now, his lips are moving with mine.
And I’m kissing him back.
I have to.
Oh sweet God above.
Stop him.
No, don’t stop him.
Yes…please, don’t stop him.
Closing my eyes tightly, I thread my fingers into his hair as my back comes against the wall. He tastes like mouthwash, his body hard against mine as he devours my mouth in a way only he can. His lips are soft, inviting, and man, I can’t stop. He smells so fucking good, and oh my God, I need him. As our mouths move
together in a hot and dirty embrace, my heart beats wildly against his. I’ve waited for this, wanted this, but I wouldn’t let myself have it.
I’ve tried so hard to resist him, but resistance is the last thing on my mind now.
Need is more like it.
When he picks me up, I gasp against his mouth, every emotion gone but lust. I’ve been beating myself up since I fell to my knees on the ice, but now, I’m done feeling like a failure. I want to feel something else. I want to feel him. I thirst for his taste, I yearn for his hands to touch me, and most of all, I want all of him. Badly. Wrapping my arms tightly around his neck, I pull back, looking deep into his lust-filled green eyes as he opens the door beside us and slams it shut with my body. We are in a stairwell, and I guess that means one thing.
He wants privacy.
And so do I.
I want it so badly I could cry like a little bitch, and I don’t care what that means. I can’t take it anymore. I want to hate him, but I want to… I don’t know, I just want him to take me somewhere else. I need this tension gone, I need to feel him inside me. I need him to take away the void that is inside me. I need to feel.
Reaching for my shirt, I pull it up as he rips his off and moves his mouth down my neck, my breasts, running his tongue along the curve of my sports bra, tasting me, and moving his fingers along the crease of my ass cheeks. Gasping, I let my head fall back, letting go, letting go of everything that is holding me back and just enjoying his mouth against my skin. Nibbling up my neck, he takes my mouth again with his, transporting me to a whole other world. I’ve never felt so free, so damn good as his hand pulls my shorts down, leaving me bare against his growing erection.
Biting down on his bottom lip, I arch against him as he places me down on the cold floor. Somewhere my flip-flops fell off, but they are the least of my worries. I have one thing on my mind, and that is him. All him. I kick my shorts off as he backs away, drinking me in as he takes his wallet out of his pocket. His hands are shaking, his eyes glued on me as he opens his wallet.
“I’ve been thinking of you like this for weeks,” he says before dumping the contents of his wallet on the floor.
I giggle as he reaches for the condom that fell, before dropping his wallet on the ground. “Do you know how bad I fucking want you?” he asks, and I nod, taking the condom from him.
