“Where first, Ro?” Bomber throws out.
I roll my head back, close my eyes, and visualise the compound. “It would either have to be in the clubhouse, or in one of the outbuildings close enough to cause damage. We’ll start in the basement and work our way up.”
“The businesses?”
“Yeah.” I seem to have been put in charge of the search, but hey, I know fire and its behaviour. “Liz, get the tattoo parlour checked out.” We’ve just opened a new one. Fucking bad time if that was taken out. “Rusty, check the bowling alley.” Christ, we have families and kids going there.
“I’ll take Tits Up,” Mace offers, as we’ve yet to put in a permanent manager.
“Sparky,” I ask, “can you check the auto-shop?”
“I’m with you,” Bomber offers.
“Me too,” says Ink.
“We…” Pal nods at Wills and Judge, the newly made up members, “we’ll check the furnace.”
“Everyone else fan out. Every inch, every bike, every fuckin’ car, needs checking. We’ll each do our rooms and I mean look in the closets, under beds, any loose floorboards. Oh, and Cad, do a sweep…”
“Did one earlier, Pyro. We’re clean.”
“Thank fuck for that.” Demon sighs loudly. “Meet back here in an hour or call Pyro if you find something.”
I nod but close my eyes briefly. I’m known for starting fires, putting them out, and am the closest thing the club’s got to a bomb disposal expert. I sincerely hope no one finds anything.
Men disperse. As I go out into the clubroom, I see them all rushing past Mel who’s standing with her mouth open. Brushing a hand over my face, I know she’s here for an explanation, what I don’t want to do is tell her the situation could have gotten a whole lot worse. Demon’s worried about a fuck load more than just her, but who else is going to take a moment to talk to her?
Obviously, no one. I approach her. “I thought you went home.”
Her face turns slightly. There’s no way she can miss the clubhouse has suddenly become a hive of activity. “I came back. I couldn’t settle. What’s going on, Pyro? I heard you coming out—have you any news? Where’s everyone going?”
Her questions are valid as she can hear a number of bikes starting.
“Whoa, darlin’. No, no news. We’re just checking some shit out.” I eye her, she looks tired. And in her possible condition, with the worry, it’s understandable. “Look, Mel, why don’t you go back home? You can’t do anything here. I promise, as soon as we know anything, I’ll come update you. We may know more in another couple of hours.” Or, so I hope.
“Home feels so empty. If I’m here and you get news…”
She’ll be safer at home if I end up having to play with explosives. “Nah, Mel. As you said, Skull will expect to find you there. You go home and see if there’s been any sign of him. If he comes back, tell him to get in touch with us at once.”
A little frown plays at her lips. Christ, I hope she’s not going to argue. I want to get on with what I need to do.
She’ll need to come in on lockdown once the place has been cleared. Will need someone to encourage her, and that can’t be left to a prospect. Might as well be me as anyone else, she seems to trust me. And, as so far, Demon, Beef and I have kept her secret, doesn’t seem any point bringing anyone else into it right now. Women like to keep that sort of shit under wraps, at least until it’s confirmed.
“Look, Mel. I’ll come around to your house later, make sure you’re updated, okay?”
“You promise? Any news or not?”
“Yeah, I promise, Mel. I’ll be there as soon as I can. Can’t say what time it will be, but I promise I’ll come.” Unless I’m blown into smithereens before then, but that I keep to myself.
I didn’t realise Demon’s come up behind me. “Scat, Melissa. You’re more use to Skull at home for the moment. Pyro will come see you later. I guarantee that.”
She glances at Demon, must see by his set expression she won’t be able to budge him from his instruction, then gives me a look. I respond with a sharp nod. At last, she collects her purse and leaves.
“Now what?” Demon asks, his eyebrow raised.
“Now we start tearing this fuckin’ place apart.”
There are three false alarms. Twice my heart is in my mouth as I’m faced with unfamiliar objects, and a third not so strange, though why a prospect would think a butt plug could conceal an explosive I’ve no idea, but I check them all out. I even have to race to the bowling alley to investigate some piping. But, thank fuck, at the end of it all, we’re as certain as we can be that there’s no explosive hidden on the compound.
One by one brothers report in that apart from the items I’ve already examined, they’ve found nothing suspicious.
I’m tired, mentally drained. It’s not fun staring death in the face as I examine something that could be booby trapped or have a hair-trigger on it. So, at the end, when Demon reminds me of my promise to go see Mel, I wish I hadn’t rashly taken that on myself.
Around us men and women are coming in carrying bags. Some looking happy, some resigned, and some complaining.
Demon watches them for a moment. Then, to me, instructs, “Bring her in, Ro.”
“Tonight?”
He thinks for a moment. “Either that or stay over at her place and bring her in in the morning. I’d send someone else, but…”
“But I know she could be pregnant so will handle her with kid gloves.”
“Exactly.”
Chapter Twelve
Melissa
Something was up. Something they didn’t want me to know about. Do they have any idea why Skull disappeared?
If they do, they’re doing better than I.
My period should have arrived yesterday, it didn’t. I’ve had no tell-tale cramps, cravings or water retention that I’ve come to expect in the days before I’m due. On the way to work today, I headed down to the pharmacy and bought a pregnancy test. I’d wanted to use it with Skull beside me. If we were starting out on this new journey, I wanted it to be together. As I’m normally regular as clockwork, I’m starting to think that test will be redundant, just confirmation of something deep down inside I already know.
I’m pregnant.
Or, maybe I’m not? Maybe not knowing where Skull could have gone has mucked up my cycle. But it was only today I’d started to worry, and even then, had been more annoyed at his club for keeping him away when I’d expected him home. It was only when I found out they knew nothing about his disappearance that I became distressed.
Where is he?
I love him. I’d know deep down inside if he was dead, wouldn’t I? My own heart would stop beating.
His club doesn’t know where he is. Could he have lied? Could he have shut me up with those words, club business, knowing it was the one thing he could have said which would stop further questions?
The test on the counter taunts me. Should I find out for certain? If I’m not, that would be one less worry on my mind. Conversely, a positive result could be a comfort, if Skull has really gone, he may have left part of himself behind.
He can’t be dead. But what other explanation is there for him staying away from me, and from his club?
I stuff my hand into my mouth and bite down hard with my teeth in an effort not to cry. Even if it’s just me, I’ve got to be strong. Can’t break down.
My phone rings. I pick it up fast. It’s Beth.
“Hey, Melissa. You okay? Why did you need the afternoon off? I told them you’d been sick.”
I could tell Beth. She’s my friend, she’d be around like a shot to comfort me.
But what could I tell her? My man, my biker, the person I expected to spend the rest of my life with has done exactly what had held me back at the start. He’s gotten fed up with an overweight, older woman, found a newer model, and had moved out.
Okay, so that’s just supposition. Is it easier to think I’ve been abandoned than to imagine Skull losin
g his life? Neither thought brings any relief.
In the end, I tell her nothing. “Beth, it’s actually the truth. I was sick, didn’t explain earlier as I couldn’t stay out of the bathroom long enough.”
“Oh, Melissa. Do you need anything? Shall I come around? Is it something you’ve eaten?”
“No, and no, Beth. I think I’ve caught a tummy bug or something. Don’t want you to catch it. But can you tell them at work? I don’t think I’ll be in tomorrow, and maybe not Friday.” But I hope to be. I hope I’ll get news, an explanation. Or, best of all, see Skull walking through the doorway. “I’ve got to go, Beth. Nature’s calling… again.”
My excuse has her ending the call quickly, with just a few words, “Feel better soon.”
Light dims, evening arrives. I flick on the light automatically but see nothing it illuminates. Instead my mind goes over and over the words Skull spoke on Sunday morning. But no matter how I try to analyse his final phrases, there was nothing, no warning, no indication he wouldn’t return.
He’d expected to come back, hadn’t he?
Of course I was concerned when he hadn’t, but I hadn’t allowed myself to really worry until I’d gone to the club for the explanation. Instead, I found what Skull had told me had been a lie.
Where is he? What is he doing?
He said he loved me. Only death would keep him from coming home.
No, no, no, no, no. I can’t afford to think like that. I can’t imagine I’ll be bringing up a fatherless baby. Can’t, just, can’t.
I honestly couldn’t tell how long I’ve been just sitting, with thoughts going around and around my brain. I’m startled when at last I hear a motorcycle engine.
Skull?
No. However much I want it to be, it doesn’t sound like his bike.
But it does stop outside. Realising it’s probably Pyro and he may have news, I rush to the door and open it before he knocks.
“Shouldn’t do that, Mel,” are his first words out of his mouth, then he explains, “it might not have been me.”
I go to tell him that it had been the logical, and as it turned out, correct assumption, but the expression on his face shows he’s completely serious. For some reason he’s annoyed that I’ve thrown open the door without checking.
Because of something they’ve found out about Skull?
It’s my turn to speak. When I do, the floodgates open.
“Have you found anything out? Do you know where Skull is? Have you found him?”
Instead of answering, his hands come to my arms and apply pressure, so I move back out of the doorway. Turning, he closes the door behind him, shooting across the bolt.
He shrugs when my eyes question him. “Can’t be too careful.”
“What is it, Pyro? Please, tell me whatever you know.”
“Can we sit?” He sends a pointed glance toward the sofa.
I don’t answer with words, just step over to my comfortable three-seater, taking a place at one end. He sits at the other, and for a moment, holds his head in his hands. There’s something about his posture that shouts out this man is exhausted.
“Can I get you anything?”
“What?” He glances across the space between us. “Nah, thanks Mel. But I’m okay. Just been a stressful day.”
“Because of Skull?” I make the assumption. “What is it you know?”
He takes a deep breath, then sighs. “Easier to tell you what we don’t know. We don’t know where he is. We’re trying to find leads of where he might have been going or gone. He may have gotten to his destination and stayed. With fuck all to go on, we’re checking in every direction. All I can tell you is that so far we’ve found no body in a morgue, no injured biker in any hospital, and no police reports which could show he’s been arrested.”
“That’s good news, isn’t it?” I’m clutching at straws.
“Could be worse,” he agrees.
“Can you really be sure of your information? What have you been doing? Making calls?” Even if someone had been on the phone ever since I left them, they couldn’t have contacted every organisation he’s named.
He gives a half-smile. “Nah, we’ve got other ways. Got the computer experts in all our chapters searching.”
“Oh.” I didn’t realise they could do that. Computer hacking probably comes under their one-percenter ways which Skull had alluded to, but never told me about. “You are searching under his real name, aren’t you?”
He rolls his eyes. “Kris Cox, yeah.”
Of course they are.
“So, he’s not dead, dying or arrested,” I surmise.
“So far we can’t say that. Not locally that’s for certain. We’re casting our net wider and wider, Mel. We’ll keep trying.”
“What…” I struggle to get out my thought, “what if he crashed, and his body’s not yet been found?” I sob. “What if we never find out what happened to him?”
“Darlin’, don’t be defeatist,” he says sharply. “We’ll find him. It’s just a matter of time.”
But even if they discover his whereabouts, there’s no guarantee he intends to come home. If he did, he’d have contacted me. Skull had never proved to be anything but dependable and he cared for me. But perhaps that too, had been a lie. Maybe disappearing had been his intention. If he left of his own volition, if nothing’s preventing him returning…
“Maybe he left me. Just didn’t want to tell me.”
“Then he’s a fuckin’ fool.” Pyro’s eyes blaze. “Skull’s got everything going for him. A good woman, a beautiful woman,” he corrects, and now it’s time for my eyes to roll. “The possibility of a family and his club. Man doesn’t walk out on that unless he’s crazy. There are ways of leaving the Satan’s Devils if that’s what he wanted. Bikers do not simply walk out on family.”
The notion I’d been selfish hits me. I hadn’t considered it wasn’t just me he’d abandoned. He must have work commitments for the club. Is it really possible he just walked out and left them?
“Something’s happened to him. We just don’t know what yet.”
Pyro doesn’t contradict that statement. “You got beer, darlin’?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“Nah,” he holds out his hand, palm facing me, “I’ll go get it. In the fridge?”
“Yes, through there in the kitchen.”
He stands, walks the few steps to where I’d indicated, and I hear a door opening and closing. It’s a few more seconds before he returns. As well as a beer, he’s holding the pregnancy test kit.
Pressing my lips together, I throw a horrified look at him and shake my head.
“Mel, you probably could do with a drink yourself. But until you know for certain, you can’t have one.”
“I was waiting for Skull,” I respond in a whisper.
He shuffles, looks uncertain, then says, “Let me be here for you instead.”
I close my eyes, thinking. Pyro’s right. I’d kill for a glass of wine or something stronger at the moment. If I’m wrong and I’m not incubating a child, I could have one. How long will I be waiting for a man who may not return? Nine months? Huh, I’ll know for certain long before then, but not for weeks yet. Unless… I take that test.
“I’m scared.”
His eyes soften. “Of course you are. But you’re not alone. You’re club.”
“Not without Skull.”
Suddenly he’s no longer standing, nor seated at the far end of the couch. He’s sitting up close beside me. “You are club,” he repeats. “Skull claimed you, which makes you a Satan’s Devil’s ol’ lady. If Skull’s not here to take care of you, everyone else will step up. You’re part of our family, darlin’.”
My eyes widen. I’d assumed they’d want nothing to do with me.
“You hardly know me,” I object.
“Don’t need to know you, Mel, though I think we probably know more than you’re thinking. But you’re one of us now. Sure, you’ve got the choice. Skull doesn’t reappear? You don’
t need to have anything to do with us, but we’re here if you want.”
I like the club, the atmosphere, the men and the old ladies. May be able to do without the whores, but that’s another matter. I’ve enjoyed all the time I’ve spent at the compound. But to go there without Skull? To take from his friends when he’s not there to support me?
Eventually I shake my head. “I don’t know, Pyro. I can’t take advantage…”
“Take advantage?” he rears back. “Mel, whether or not you take us up on the offer, you’ll find we’re there for you. We owe it to Skull. Wherever he is, whatever he’s doing, he’s still a member of this club. If he’s got himself locked up, we’ll look after his woman for him until he’s able to do it himself. That’s the way it works, Mel. You’re still his old lady.”
“I’m still his old lady?” I gaze at him incredulously. “He walked out on me…”
“Nah. You don’t know that. Want my view? That’s the last fuckin’ thing he’d do. Something’s stopping him coming back.”
“Something made him leave in the first place,” I counter.
Pyro’s eyes fall to the packet he’s still holding. Could Skull have left because he was scared I was pregnant? Didn’t want to step up and do the right thing? Before I can have second thoughts, I stand, snatch the test out of Pyro’s hands and head off to the bathroom.
I need to know.
If I’m not, perhaps somehow he’ll find out, perhaps someone would get the message through and he’ll come back.
Although if that’s the reason he did, would I really want him? A man who left because he was too scared to have a baby.
I read the instructions, do the necessary, then walk back out to where Pyro’s still sitting. I leave the test on the side, suddenly changing my mind. I don’t want to know.
If it’s positive, life as I know it changes.
If it’s not, I’m still on my own.
Minutes tick by.
“Want me to look?”
I haven’t got the nerve to do it myself. I give a small nod. Then watch, trying to read the expression on his face, but his features give away nothing as he stares at the result.
Devil's Dilemma: Satan's Devils MC Colorado Chapter #4 Page 10
