by Emily Sharp
“You know, Travis, just because I'm a woman doesn't mean I can’t do things for myself. Stop trying to be some knight in shining armor,” she spat at him.
“Oh, I'm sorry,” Travis said, his face looking hurt.
“Travis, you’re fine,” I said. “Get back in the car, hun.”
He nodded and a moment later the car door shut and I turned to Veronica, who was working the spare out of the trunk.
“What the hell is your problem?” I said.
She pulled the tire out and leaned it against the bumper, then turned to me.
“He does it all the time. I'm capable of doing things myself. I don't need for him to do everything for me, like you do.
“What are you talking about? He likes to help.” I said.
She shook her head. “Yeah, he likes to carry your suitcases or fix your washing machine. Have you ever tried to do something by yourself? Oh, no, that’s right, you didn't have to growing up.”
I felt anger rush through me. “You know what? I don't know what your problem is, but you are acting crazy. And if you’re pissed at me, fine. Don't take it out on him. That’s not right.”
She shrugged, then began using the jack under the car.
“So, what is it? Why are you so pissed?”
She stood up, facing me, her mouth drawn tight. “Really, Julie? Let’s see, where do I start? Oh, and how about, ‘Hey, Veronica, you look like a slut. Change out of those shorts’.”
I shook my head. “I did not say it like that,” I said.
“Yeah, but you meant it that way. And then that bitch your dad’s dating…well, I guess it’s OK for her to walk all over me.” Her voice rose with each word.
“First, it’s not OK. We were trying to move the conversation to something different. Even my dad tried. If you weren't so intent on leaving, you would have known that he threw her ass out. He tried. He’s a good man.”
She laughed. “Yeah, you and your dad,” she said.
I stepped up to her. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Daddy's little princess does no wrong. Oh, Daddy, what a great idea. I’ll get the good job and Veronica can find a job wherever I move. Her opinion doesn't count.”
“What? You’re kidding, right? I never said my job was going to be better than yours. And yeah, if I took a job somewhere, I would want you to come with me. Is that a crime?” Tears rolled down my face. The wind seemed to freeze them as they fell, my cheeks burning from the cold.
“Whatever. You and Daddy decide what I wear, where I work, and where I am going to live. I guess I'm just along for the ride, providing laughs along the way.”
“You need to stop about my dad. He’s a good man and he has been nothing but nice to you. And then you go do that crap back there. Thanks a lot,” I said, my tears now ones of anger.
“Whatever, princess,” she said, then went back to the jack.
I shook my head and walked back to the car and got in. Travis looked out the window, and I thought about what Veronica had said.
“Travis,” I said, and he looked at me.
“You don't think I use you or take advantage of you when you help me out, do you? Please be honest.” I wiped my face.
“No, I love helping people. And you never made me feel like I was being used,”
“Thanks,” I said.
A short time later Veronica closed the trunk, and getting back into the car, we were on our way. The snow was coming down hard now, and with a spare on the back, I drove a little slower.
Ten minutes in, Veronica leaned forward from the back seat.
“Travis, I'm sorry about back there,” she said.
“It’s all right, it happens,” he said.
“No, it’s not. You’re a good guy and I…well, I took my anger out on you. Sorry.”
“Hey, all is forgiven,” he said.
***
Two hours later we pulled into the apartment complex. Travis grabbed his bag and walked back to his apartment.
“Mind coming up front?” I said, peering over the back seat.
She didn't say anything, instead, got out and joined me in the front seat.
I turned toward her, the heat blowing on us, the snow falling outside. I didn't want to fight anymore and just wanted to hold her, let her know I loved her.
“I'm sorry about earlier. You were right, I made you feel bad about the way you were dressed. I'm sorry, and I don't want to fight.” I looked at her, pleading.
She didn't say anything, just looked out at the parking lot.
“Veronica,” I said, putting my hand on hers. She pulled her hand back as though my touch was hot and turned to me.
“Look, Julie, this isn't working out,” she said.
“What? What isn't?” I said, my heart beginning to race.
“Us. It was fun, but let’s be honest, we are two different people. You have your life and I have mine and today was obvious that it can’t work.”
“What? You don't mean…” I said, tears starting to run down my face.
A car drove by slowly and then parked a few spaces down.
“Listen,” I said, trying not to sob, “come inside, we can sit down and work this out. There is no reason we can’t work this out.”
“That’s Dave,” she said, ignoring what I had said and nodding at the car that had parked. She opened the door, and throwing mine open, I went around to meet her in the back.
“Open the trunk, please,” she said.
“What? You can’t be serious?” I said, my heart breaking.
“Just open the trunk,” she said. I put the key in the lock, my hand trembling as the lid raised up. She reached in and grabbed her bag.
“Veronica, don't do this. Don't walk away from us. I love you.”
She turned to me, and I could see the hesitation in her eyes. I felt the bond between us breaking, being severed.
“People fight sometimes, it happens. But you don't walk away. You don't leave someone you love! We made a promise!” I said, now releasing all my hurt into my words. I didn't know exactly what to say, but I knew I was moments away from losing the woman I loved.
“They do, Julie. They walk away all the time. Goodbye,” she said, and then walked away, bag on her shoulder.
“Don't do this!” I yelled. “Don't you dare leave me!” I felt nauseated. The tears were falling so fast I had to keep wiping at my eyes as they clouded over. I hoped she would turn around, I wished for her to stop. There was no way this was happening, my world was falling apart.
“Veronica, I love you!” I cried as she opened the door to Dave’s car and got in. A moment later, the car pulled out and drove off.
I grabbed my own bag, and heading into my apartment, fell on the couch and sobbed. My heart had shattered into a million pieces, my soul was ripped from inside me. I had never had my heart broken before, and that night I lost not only my love, but my best friend.
Later, lying in bed, I cried, wondering if there was any way to salvage the relationship.
***
The next morning, I woke up and all the events of the day before rushed through my mind. I looked at the clock. It was almost noon. I reached for my phone and hoped she had left me a text but saw none.
Grabbing a change of clothes, I headed to the bathroom to take a shower. Standing under the hot water, I thought of a plan. I would text her, letting her know she could take the time she needed. When she was ready, we could talk about everything and in that, work it out. It was simple, but sometimes simple was the best plan of action.
Ten minutes later, the coffee pot was brewing as I threw on my favorite pair of jeans and a sweatshirt. Grabbing my phone. I headed back into the kitchen, pouring myself a cup, then went to the couch and pulled my lap blanket over me.
“All right, let’s see,” I mumbled out loud as I thought about what to say. Then I typed out a simple message.
“I know you’re upset, but let’s not throw something good away. When you’re ready, let me know and w
e can work this out. We can do it on your time. Love you.”
I hit send and then took a sip of my coffee. I felt hope and knew I would have to be patient, let her work through her own emotions. But my heart leapt for joy two minutes later when my phone buzzed, her name flashing.
Excited, I opened the message and read it.
“I told you last night it’s over. Please don't call or text me ever again. Thank you.”
I dropped my phone, my heart breaking all over again. All hope, any chance of salvaging this relationship, was gone. It was over, and there was no going back.
That day I lay curled up on the couch, my tears never seeming to stop. How could she walk away like this? We had something special, a bond, and now it was severed. I felt like part of my own soul had left me, a piece of my heart gone forever.
The phone rang and a burst of hope went through me. But it was my dad.
“Hey, kiddo, how are things?” he said.
“Oh, Dad,” I said and began to cry. For the next fifteen minutes, I sobbed as I explained everything to him up until her final text this morning. When I was done, he was quiet for a moment before he spoke.
“Julie, I'm sorry about what happened. Cathy and I are taking a break as well.”
“I'm sorry, Dad. I should have done something.”
“Nah, it’s OK. These things happen. Give Veronica some time. This was more than just an argument at the dinner table. That girl is hurt, you can see it in her.”
I knew he was right, that she was hurt deeply and carried it with her. But I wanted to take that hurt from her, to hold her and let her know it was OK.
“Thanks, Dad,” I said.
“Love you,” he said. “I’ll talk to you soon.”
Chapter Sixteen
The days soon became weeks and then weeks became a month. The last day of school was here, and Christmas was just over a week away.
I pulled my car into a shop downtown that sold women’s clothing. It was a popular place that sold clothes I wouldn't wear but I knew someone who would. Getting out of the car, I pulled my woolen hat down over my ears. It had snowed last night, accumulating a few inches, and it was still overcast and cold.
Heading into the shop, I stopped and looked around. The place was pretty big, clothing racks everywhere. On the wall, different shirts were displayed, coats, and even leather boots.
“Hi, can I help you with anything?” a girl asked me. She was about my height with spiked red hair. She was wearing a flannel long-sleeved shirt and a pair of jeans with combat boots. Her eyebrow, lips, and nose were pierced.
“Hi, yeah, I have a friend, and I need to buy her something special for Christmas,” I said.
“OK, your friend, does she dress like you?” she said.
I laughed. “No, sort of like you, but more black. Kind of like metal, maybe?”
The girl smiled. “No problem, and do you have a budget?”
“No budget. I just want it to be something personal.”
Her face lit up.
“Follow me,” she said. I followed her as she walked past the counter and over to where a selection of leather jackets was displayed.
“Wow, they are cool,” I said, looking at the coats. There were a lot of black leather, some with fur, bomber jacket, metal, all sorts of styles.
“So, you thinking something to go to a concert in? Or something you could wear at a fancy restaurant?” she said.
“Oh, yeah, maybe the restaurant one,” I said.
“Let me show you this one,” she said, walking over and turning one of them around.
It was a black leather jacket that was cut short to hang around the waistline. The collar had beautiful fur trim with a mix of brown, black, and white. The cuffs had matching trim as well.
“That is beautiful,” I said, taking it from her. I ran my hand over the smooth leather and then the fur, which I knew would keep her warm. “I love it. I’m definitely getting it.”
“You know…I have a have a pair of pants that would go well with it.”
“Show me, please!” I said, excited.
Walking to a different section, she showed me a pair, and then finding the right size, I grinned, holding it up.
“She’s going to love them,” I said.
“How about these? Sorry for the upsell, but they rock.” She held up a pair of black leather boots with a black and purple striped pattern running through them.
“Size seven?” I said.
“Be right back,” she said laughing.
I walked around the store, looking at the different styles, and then saw a necklace. It was silver and had a heart-shaped pendant. And it was purple.
“Perfect,” I whispered, holding it in my hand and tracing the heart with my finger. Smiling I headed up to the counter.
“All right, here they are in size seven,” She said, “Do you want these gift-wrapped?”
I looked at my phone. I still had just over an hour before class started.
“That would be great, thank you.”
Ten minutes later, I attached a card I had written up last night to one of the boxes. I let Veronica know how much I loved her.
Once I had everything in the car, I backed out of the space and decided to head over to her place. And maybe with a bit of luck, a Christmas miracle could be had.
***
I pulled up to her house and saw that her car was in the driveway running, the engine purring along as the vapors from the exhaust billowed out in the cold air. Excited, I got out of the car and grabbed the boxes, walking up the driveway. The front door opened, and Veronica stepped out. I stopped in place, looking at her, my heart pounding. I missed her so much and not seeing or hearing from her for a month brought everything to the surface, which I was trying to hold back.
She was wearing her work uniform with a black leather jacket over it. She walked up to me, and instead of the hello I was expecting, I received a cold stare.
“What do you want?” Her voice was sharp and abrupt.
“I… for you. It’s Christmas,” I said, handing her the boxes.
“No thanks,” she said, raising her hand up.
I nodded my head, pulling the gifts back. “How have you been?”
“Busy. I have to go work now. Please don't come back.”
I tried my hardest not to burst out in tears, the rejection overwhelming me. Setting the boxes down on her car, I looked at her, my heart longing.
“I’m just going to leave those there. And if you don't want them, that’s fine. I hope you have a Merry Christmas.” I hoped for something in her eyes, a flicker of hope that I could hold onto. But it wasn't there. And in that moment, the truth hit me. And the truth doesn’t hurt. No, it devastates. All hopes and dreams were gone in that moment.
“I won’t come back, I'm sorry,” I said. The tears let loose as I hurried back to my car. Starting it, I couldn't look over as I drove away. But taking a glance in the rear-view mirror, I saw her reach for the boxes.
***
“Last thing before we go,” Professor Roberts said as everyone got up to leave. “The roads out there have been really bad lately. The city is out every day plowing. So, when you’re out and about, take your time. There is no need to rush, stay safe and Merry Christmas.”
I was still hurting over this morning, and I just wanted to get home and bury my sorrows with a tub of ice cream.
“Hey, Julie,” the professor said, waving me over as I moved toward the door. I walked over to his desk, and he smiled at me as he put a few folders away.
“Hey, do you still have Mark’s phone number by chance?” he asked.
“Yeah, his card is in my wallet. Why is that?”
“I can’t say,” he said, leaning in like a conspirator. “But the word is, you should call. There might be a career opportunity in the very near future.”
“Really?”
He shrugged. “That’s the rumor. You have yourself a Merry Christmas, I’ll see you next month.”
&nbs
p; “Merry Christmas to you as well,” I said, walking out, a smile on my face. They were looking to hire me! It was a big corporation, the possibilities of advancement were unlimited. I started to get really excited. I could be making great money once I graduated. I could move to New York, Toronto, or even Germany. The possibilities were endless.
Then it hit me, it would also mean I would move away from Veronica and possibly never see her again. As I got in my car, I felt overwhelmed at first about such a big decision. But there was no decision; Veronica had reaffirmed my worst fear this morning. There was no more us.
Chapter Seventeen
It was Christmas Eve morning, and Travis had helped me load my bags into the car. There was no snow and the temperature was actually in the mid-forties. With the bit of sun that was shining this morning, it was actually a nice day already.
“Are you sure you don't want to come?” I said.
“No, I'm going to spend the day talking to Alice. And I mean the whole day!” he said, his face beaming.
“All right, then. Well, Merry Christmas, my friend,” I said, then hugged him.
“You too, and drive carefully.”
“I will, I promise,” I said, raising my hand as if I was being sworn in to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. We both laughed.
The drive to my dad’s was perfect and the traffic surprisingly light. The roads were clear, and I felt a little upbeat. I had a phone call from Mark the day before, offering me an internship with his company for the remainder of my college training that would probably lead into a full-time position afterward.
I pulled off for gas. Though the tank was only at the halfway point, I thought filling up now wouldn't hurt and let me stretch for a minute. Pulling into the gas station, I realized it was the same one the three of us were at just over a month ago.
I pumped the gas and thought about how much can change in such a short amount of time. I looked over to the station and smiled thinking how I would love to see Veronica walk out, Travis with his cowboy hat on his head jumping into the back.
Putting the pump back in its holder, I drove on to my dad’s.
***
By two in the afternoon I was already at the kitchen table with Dad eating tacos.
