Sin

by M. Malone

  Whatever we didn’t know, we’d discover together.

  I lost myself in the warmth of her skin, glorying over her softness and drowning in the combined fragrance of our arousal. By the time I fumbled into the night stand for a box of condoms Oskar had given me as a gag gift last Christmas, Gemma was covered in a light sheen of sweat and her eyes were squeezed closed.

  “Are you sure?” I whispered.

  When her eyes opened, the gentleness speared me straight to the core.

  “Yes, Matthias. I’ve never wanted anything more in my life.”

  My hands were trembling as I ripped open the condom and rolled it on carefully. Gemma put a soft hand on my cheek, and when I looked up at her, she smiled.

  “I’m so glad it’s you.”

  A smile broke free then as I understood what she was really saying. This was her first time too, and she was happy to share it with me. Her hand tugged me down for a kiss and I settled right between her thighs. When her arms wrapped around my neck, I pushed forward and then paused at her hiss of breath.

  “Am I hurting you?” I whispered urgently.

  Instantly her arms locked around my neck, holding me in place. “Don’t you dare stop!”

  I couldn’t have even if I’d wanted to. She was so warm and tight, and the wet heaven I was sinking into was quickly stealing my ability for higher reasoning.

  “Matthias… It feels so good,” Gemma moaned against my lips, rocking her hips slightly to take me deeper.

  I was lost. The sensations were too strong, and knowing that it was my Gigi there with me took me to a place where all of my defenses were down. We weren’t vulnerable children anymore. I was a man now who could protect her. She was my family, and I had the tools now to defend what was mine. I growled and thrust deeper, my fingers clenching into fists as I was completely enveloped in her warmth.

  Gemma let out a soft cry, and then her muscles went crazy, squeezing around me. The sight of her losing it was too much for me. Fuck, it felt good, the soft tugs on my cock combined with her warm, wet mouth tugging at mine. I could feel it coming, a tsunami of sensation, building up from the soles of my feet straight up my spine. I groaned as I came again, burying myself deep.

  My arms tightened around her, clutching her close as we rode out the last pulses of our climax together. And the only thought I could hold on to was I’m not letting go this time.

  17

  Matthias

  Waking up with a warm, curvy bottom against my stomach was on the list of things I had never thought would happen. My eyes opened, and I blinked at the sight of dark hair strewn across my pillow.

  Gemma slept even wilder than I did.

  I sat up slightly, careful not to wake her. She was sleeping on her side, facing away from me, and the sheets were all tangled around her legs. No wonder I’d woken up. I was freezing. I pulled the blanket she’d kicked off up higher and over my body.

  It was crazy, but I couldn’t stop smiling. If any of the guys saw me right now they’d give me shit for the rest of my natural life. But this kind of thing was no big deal for them. They’d probably woken up with women in their beds plenty of times.

  Me, well, I’d always been on my own. After all the sick shit I’d been exposed to growing up, it was just easier to avoid all emotional entanglement, and I’d never really trusted anyone enough to go to sleep in their presence anyway.

  And I hadn’t missed it, or at least I hadn’t thought I was missing anything. I’d structured my life to my specifications and I had been… satisfied. But being happy was an entirely new experience. I wasn’t sure how to process this intensity of emotion.

  Just then Gemma moaned softly and then rolled over, bumping into my chest. Her eyes flew open and she blinked at me in confusion. Then her eyes lit up and she grinned with such unabashed joy that I instantly knew I was done for.

  Game Over. It’s a wrap, I thought. What man could resist a woman who made him feel like he was her favorite thing in the world?

  Had anyone ever been that happy to see me? It was overwhelming that seeing me could make her smile like that. But that was how Gemma made me feel. Like I was enough.

  Like I was everything.

  “Good morning,” she murmured, turning her face into the pillow. “I’m sure I have morning breath.”

  “I don’t care about that,” I growled.

  She shook her head frantically. “Yes you do. It’s so gross!”

  I laughed and then leaned down and tickled her playfully until she stopped hiding her face. Then I kissed her until she was moaning into my mouth and clutching my neck.

  Because I could, damn it.

  “This morning I want to get you into a safe house. We have one that’s almost ready but I want to tweak a few things and make sure you’re secure. Your stepfather will have no idea where you are.”

  For a moment her expression darkened, and I hated that I’d had to bring it up and take the smile from her face. But it was important that she know how to keep herself safe. If I couldn’t be with her every moment, I was going to make sure she had the best security system money could buy.

  “You don’t need to do all of that. I’m sure I’ll be okay.”

  I was already shaking my head. “Not enough. I can’t take any chances with you.”

  I didn’t say anything else, but she seemed to get it. Gemma sat up and kissed me softly on the cheek.

  “Okay. When can we go see it?”

  I climbed out of bed, thrilled at the blush that hit her cheeks when she realized I was completely nude. “After breakfast. That’ll give me time to make sure everything is up and running and for the guys to do one last sweep of the neighborhood.”

  Gemma looked a little worried and she didn’t lose the slightly stressed-out expression as we ate a quick but tasty breakfast of scrambled eggs and sausage. By the time we were in one of the company-issued black Jeeps, she still had a line in the middle of her forehead.

  When we pulled up to the nondescript apartment building right on the edge of the East Village, I grabbed her hand.

  “It’s all going to be fine, yeah?”

  She gave me a smile, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Thank you for this. I don’t want you to think I’m ungrateful. I just feel bad that you and the other guys are doing all this work to hide me. I’m sure there are a lot of other people who need your help.”

  “You need our help.”

  She shrugged. “You know what I mean. People who really need it.”

  I couldn’t understand why she would feel that way. She’d been hurt. I’d seen how vicious her bruises were with my own eyes. It still made me crazy that she wouldn’t tell me her stepfather’s name. I’d searched her identity online but couldn’t find connections to either her mother or a stepfather. Otherwise I would have already paid the asshole a visit.

  We took the stairs up to the third floor, and I scrutinized every aspect of the building, even though Rafe had personally recommended the location. The stairwells were wide and well-lit, and the hallways were clean. When we reached her unit number, I pulled the key from my pocket. We entered into a bright living room with honey-toned wood floors and an abundance of natural light.

  “Oh Matthias. This is beautiful.”

  “Yeah it is. Rafe really found a gem.” I didn’t mention that we were probably only getting this place at a decent price because the owner of the building owed Rafe a favor or something.

  “I can’t believe this is all for me. It’s huge!” Gemma walked further into the unit, exploring the kitchen.

  I could hear her exclaiming over the new appliances as I checked out the security panel, adjusting a few of the settings and then making sure the changes registered in my central command program.

  The longer we were there, the more agitated I started to feel. Usually at this point I was comfortable with the security, but for Gemma it just wasn’t enough.

  Let’s face it, you won’t think it’s enough until she has a team of armed guar
ds and basically lives in a Kevlar bubble.

  I ran a hand over my face. I didn’t want Gemma in this fucking apartment alone. I wanted her with me. Always. But it was way too soon to propose anything like that. Not to mention that it wasn’t safe. I’d always lived my life like death was imminent. Taking revenge and laying out my plans, knowing that one day my number would be up. I’d been fine with that when it was just me, but I didn’t want my karma landing on Gemma. Ever. My Tigger didn’t deserve that. Her life had been hard enough, and just like when we were kids, all I wanted to do was protect her.

  A sudden knock on the door startled us both. My hand went to the gun in my waistband before I realized the security panel was already streaming an image of our visitor.

  Gemma peered over my shoulder. “Oh it’s Rafe and Oskar!” She unlocked the door and pulled it open before I could respond.

  I gritted my teeth. We were going to have a little conversation about opening the door before fully assessing the situation. What if there had been someone lurking in the hallway behind my friends, waiting for a chance to strike when she opened the door?

  Obviously anyone who tried that with me, Rafe and Oskar around had a death wish, but it could happen when she was here alone and one of her friends came to visit. She had to be more careful. This was New York City, after all.

  “Hi! Come on in. Thanks again for finding this place for me. It’s amazing.” Gemma ushered Rafe and Oskar in like old friends, and of course like the bastards that they were, they were just eating it up.

  Especially Oskar, who kept shooting amused glances at me every time Gemma would smile at them or touch their arms. I gritted my teeth. The big blond bastard knew damned well how irritating it was to see my girl touching them so familiarly.

  “We just wanted to come check on you. See how you like the place,” Oskar drawled.

  The bastard made it sound like he’d come out of his way just to check on her, I thought grumpily. It was standard procedure for them to check on a new client once they were put in a safe house. But of course Gemma didn’t know that. By her smile, she thought Oskar and Rafe had made a special trip just for her. It took quite a bit of willpower to keep me from pointing out that they were just doing their jobs.

  “I appreciate it so much. This is a great apartment.” Gemma ushered them into the living room like they were guests coming over for tea.

  Rafe, clearly reading the mounting rage on my face, walked toward the kitchen and away from the group. Oskar just grinned broadly and hovered next to Gemma. Right next to her. Then he put his arm around her shoulders casually. Oh hell no.

  “Back the fuck up, asshole!” I barked, then immediately wished I hadn’t when Gemma gasped.

  She glanced between the two of us warily. “Is everything okay?”

  Oskar removed his arm, way too slowly for my liking. I bared my teeth.

  “Everything is fine. There are just a few things we need to check on, and then we’ll leave you to it.” Oskar gave me a knowing look before he walked toward the hallway leading to the bedrooms.

  Gemma

  I watched as Oskar walked away. When I turned back around, Matthias was glaring at his back like the other man was a threat or something. He didn’t lose the feral look until our eyes met and the careful, blank mask he usually wore dropped over his features like a shield.

  There he is, I thought. It was amazing how he could turn it off and on again at will. I was starting to understand why everyone referred to him with reverence. He was skilled at keeping himself concealed, revealing only what he wanted you to see. But I’d seen the real Matthias, the one forged on a cold afternoon when our hope had been built up and lost in the span of one afternoon.

  “You didn’t have to be so rude, you know? He was just being nice.” I couldn’t resist teasing him a bit. It should have rankled me that he was acting like a caveman. It wasn’t like I was some delicate little flower.

  But honestly, I’d gotten a little thrill when he’d growled at the other man like that. It was obvious that he didn’t want any other man near me, which was archaic but still sexy as hell.

  “He needs to do his fucking job,” Matthias muttered before he turned back to the security panel.

  I smothered my grin. He didn’t seem to know how to handle his jealousy either, which made sense if he hadn’t had many girlfriends. Or any, I thought, remembering his confession that I was his first. It seemed so hard to believe.

  The thought reminded me of the type of life he’d led, the places he’d been. It brought a damper on things to know that he’d kept to himself because of all the shit the Family had put him through. He was likely the only person who’d really understand why I was doing this.

  I turned away and squeezed my hands together. It was so tempting to confide in him. To tell him everything and let him protect me the way he done so many times in the past.

  Stick to the plan.

  Even though I doubted I’d spend much time here, I walked up behind him and peered at the security panel. It looked pretty standard, but knowing Matthias he’d added some modifications or something. He wasn’t an out-of-the-box kind of guy. If he was going to believe that I was the damsel in distress, I needed to play the part.

  “Would you mind walking me through this security system?” I smiled at him. It seemed to put him at ease because his shoulders dropped and he lost the tight, pinched look around his eyes.

  Matthias started pointing things out, but I was only half paying attention. Now that I’d opened that line of thought, it was all I could think about, telling Matthias and getting his help. He would likely be able to come up with some high tech way to get Sabine out, maybe hack his way into the Family and find out when their defenses would be lowest. They could plan a coordinated attack, get Sabine, and free as many of the women still enslaved there as possible.

  It would be risky no matter how I sliced it. This whole thing was one breath away from disaster, and I was hyper-aware that it was my friend’s life on the line if anything didn’t go according to plan. That’s why you should tell Matthias, my mind suggested helpfully. He can help you. When has he ever let you down?

  But even as I thought it, my mind produced a much more likely scenario; me letting him down. Matthias putting his life on the line for me. Again.

  Getting hurt. Again.

  He’d already been down that road once and had to watch me almost drown in the icy water of the Thames. Everything he’d gone through had been because he’d tried to get me to safety.

  I wouldn’t do that to him again. This time I was going to save him.

  Whether he’d welcome it or not.

  “Hey, are you okay?” Matthias had finally clued in to my mood and was watching me with narrowed eyes.

  I fixed a smile on my face. “No, everything is fine. It’s just a lot to remember.”

  He didn’t look convinced, but he didn’t push, for which I was grateful. It was going to be hard enough to keep this from him. I didn’t think I would have the willpower to lie to him while he was being so sweet.

  I bit my lip. If I couldn’t resist him already, what the hell was I going to do when it was time to hand him over to ORUS?

  18

  Matthias

  The next day, I watched Gemma carefully. Something was wrong. It didn’t matter how much time had passed between us—I knew her, inside and out.

  Now you know her body too.

  Despite myself, my heart rate ticked up just remembering her taste, and that breathy little sound she made just before she came. Yeah, this is not helping. She didn’t need the part of me that couldn’t get enough of her. She needed the part of me that had loved her since we were kids. “You want to tell me what’s wrong?”

  She looked up from the book she’d been reading. “Nothing. I’m fine. Good. I promise.”

  I chuckled low. “Yeah, I don’t believe you. You’re forgetting, love: I know you.”

  A blush crept up her neck. “It’s nothing you need to worry abo
ut. I swear. I’m happy that I have you now. I promise. You can stop worrying.”

  Stop worrying? For ten years I thought she was dead. Gone. I thought I’d been unable to protect her. And now she was back and she thought I could just let it go? Not bloody likely.

  “When are you going to get it? I can feel that something is off with you. It’s like that first time that we met. Do you remember? You were so little. The other kids, they thought that survival was a solitary game and didn’t want to help you. But I knew how much you needed me. I couldn’t leave you to your own devices then.”

  She gave me a soft, wistful smile. “You walked right up to me and said, ‘I’m Matt. I’m going to take care of you now.’”

  My lips tipped up into a smirk. “I could barely take care of myself. I had no business trying to take care of you too.”

  She smiled at me. “Are you kidding? Without you I would have died within a week.”

  I shook my head. “You were tougher than you gave yourself credit for. I mean, hell, look at you now. After everything you’ve been through, you’re still so incredibly strong.”

  I joined her on the bed and tugged her to me, laying her head on my shoulder. “Whatever is going on, whatever you’re afraid of, just let me know. I will slay those dragons or die trying. Right now, it seems even death can’t keep us apart. I love you, Gigi. I’m starting to think the reason I haven’t had a heart all this time is because it’s been with you.”

  She pulled back. Her gaze searched mine. “I have never forgotten you. There have been a million times when I pretended that you survived that place and you were happy somewhere. That maybe, just maybe, you’d made it to your gran’s house.” She frowned. “I guess neither of us ever made it.”

  I shook my head. “No, we didn’t. But we made it somewhere better; back to each other.”