The Secret

by K. A. Applegate

  I saw Marco's eyes dart quickly, looking to see if anyone was close enough to have overheard. "Sorry. Ree. Saw-ree," Ax said. "Rachel's plan would not work." Jake sighed. "Tobias also saw something else. Inside the force field. There are tiny holes in the wood foundation of the building. He thinks it's termites at work." "Termites?" I asked. Jake nodded. "Yep." I swallowed. "Jake, termites are awfully close to being ants." "They aren't as vicious," Jake said. "I looked up some information on the Internet. Besides, if we make sure we morph a termite from that very colony, we'd fit right in." I was having trouble breathing. I noticed Marco's face turning gray. Even Ax looked grim. "You're not serious, right?" I asked Jake. "I mean, termites? Termites?" I probably sounded slightly hysterical. I know I felt slightly hysterical. "I don't know how else to do it," Jake said. He was looking down at the table and biting his lip. "Cassie, you were right when you said the real question is how these guys got permission to start logging. That's their weakness. We have to know how they pulled this off. To know that we have to get inside that building." "Through termite tunnels?" Marco asked. "Look, how do we even get a termite to acquire? They're all inside that force field, right?" I wanted that to be the truth. But when I looked at Jake, he just shook his head a little. "Tobias says they were working on the building a little today. Putting in extra Dracon beams. They had to cut away some of the logs." Jake reached into the pocket of his jacket. He pulled out a small, glass vial. The top had tiny holes in it to let air through. Inside the vial was a tiny, tan-and-white bug. It was about the size of an ant. It had an enlarged brown head. "Same colony," Jake said. "From the same building." I stared at the termite. It tried to climb up the side of the glass, but it slipped back down. It was helpless. It was trapped in what must have seemed like a huge glass cell held by a creature so gigantic that the termite could never even begin to imagine it. Jake took the top off the vial. "We don't do this unless everyone agrees," he said. "But we can't let the ... them . . . start tearing through the forest." Rachel held out her hand. Jake tapped the vial till the insect landed in her palm. I saw it crawl across Rachel's lifeline. And I saw it become still, as Rachel acquired the termite DNA. I imagined being that termite. Crawling across the gigantic hand. Thinking every crease in Rachel's palm was as deep as a ditch. When Rachel was done, I held out my own hand. It was shaking. It was shaking and I couldn't stop it from shaking. The brightly lit mall food court suddenly seemed dark. Lord, that tiny insect scared me. Deep down inside, it truly scared me.

  C HAPTE

  R

  LJJ-EVERY would go that night. That very night. We were supposed to use the afternoon to deal with chores and family stuff and homework. Try it sometime. Try doing homework when you think you may be going to your doom in a few hours. Try concentrating on math when you're thinking you have to turn into a termite and sneak into a heavily defended building. Good luck. I went out to the barn. My dad was out there, making his rounds. He didn't need my help, but he didn't say no, either. "Did you finish your homework?" "Mostly." I added another lie to the pile I'd already had to tell. "I was going to take a closer look at your skunk from last night. She was very agitated so I had to give her a mild sedative." "It's a female?" "Yep." My father carried the cage into the little side room he uses to examine the patients. I eased the skunk from her cage and cradled her out to the examination table. She seemed very calm now, but it was an unnatural, drugged calm. The night before, my dad had bandaged the wound and now he carefully removed the gauze. The sight of the burn made me wince, even though I've seen hundreds of injured animals. "Hmm. Hmm. Pah. Pah. Pah. Hmmm." That's the sound my dad makes when he's examining something interesting. "Pah." I don't know why, he just does. "Weird. Very unusual. I cannot for the life of me guess what caused this burn. It's too neat. Too clean. The only good thing is, whatever caused it was so hot it partially cauterized the tissue." "Muscle damage, or is it just superficial?" I asked. My dad glanced at me and smiled. "It's mostly fur and skin that were burned. But I see some moderately severe damage in the shoulder here. Much deeper and the spine would have been burned. But she'll live. I wish I could say as much for her kits." "Her what? She has babies?" "Yeah. I'd say probably about six, seven weeks old." "She has babies? Out there somewhere in the woods?" My dad started applying a new bandage. "Cassie, you know nature plays rough." "But they're too young to survive on their own, aren't they?" "I can't be sure," he said, not looking at me. It occurred to me then that sometimes maybe he lied to me, too. For my own good. Or because of what he thought was my own good. "They're sitting in some den wondering where their mother is," I said. "They'll starve to death. Or be eaten by predators." "Hand me the scissors," my father said. "Yeah. Okay. Urn, look. I meant to ask you, is it okay if I spend the night at Rachel's tonight?" "Sure, honey. You know, if your mom says it's okay. Hey. You never asked how my meeting went with the cat food people this morning. We got some additional funding!" We talked for a while as we made rounds together. But my heart wasn't in it. I was thinking about some baby skunks somewhere, mewing and crying for their mother. And I was thinking I wished my dad wasn't so quick to let me go to Rachel's. Because, of course, we weren't really having a sleepover. Rachel was going to tell her mom she was spending the night at my house. And Jake would tell his parents a lie, and Marco would tell his father a lie, and we'd all be going into a situation that none of us wanted to be in. I was going to face death, that very night. And the last thing I would have said to my father was a lie. I remembered the tunnels of the ants. I remembered them the way I saw them in my nightmares. I never had seen them in reality. Ants don't see very well, and there's no light underground. But in my dreams I saw everything. I saw the huge, metallic-looking heads of the enemy ants as they crashed through sand walls and locked their massive pincers on me and tried to slice me into pieces. Do you know what it's like to think that you're going to die, and never even get back to human form? To believe that you're going to die as an ant, trapped in a hell that no human had ever been to? And now I also saw those little skunk kits. Starving. Crying out, and with each cry, signaling to some predator. "Sweetheart, are you okay?" I realized my dad was staring at me. I had been breathing hard, almost crying. There were beads of sweat on my forehead. "Yeah. Fine. Fine," I said quietly. He finished his rounds and left. I stayed behind. I went back to the skunk in her cage. I opened the cage door and put my hand in. I was not wearing a glove. See, you can't acquire DNA if you're wearing gloves. LjJell, what a surprise seeing you all here," Marco said in a low whisper. "Everyone still up for this?" Jake asked. "Sure," Marco answered. "We're looking forward to it. Who needs sleep when you can run off on a suicide mission instead?" It was pitch-black. It was three in the morning. We were at the edge of the forest. Jake, Rachel, Marco, and me. Tobias was in the tree above us. The same five kids who had wandered stupidly through a construction site at night on our way home from the mall. The same kids who had seen the Andalite fighter land. The same five kids whose lives had been changed forever. We had been made into soldiers that night. Soldiers in a terrible war we could not really hope to win. Tobias had paid a terrible price. But so had the rest of us. There we were, in the dark, ready to do things that would make us scream if we ever stopped to think about them for too long. Ax was there, too. Poor Ax, who was even more alone than the rest of us. He was in his own body, his stalk eyes restlessly peering in every direction. "I thought we'd morph owls," Jake suggested. "They're fast, and they fly well at night. Till we get close." I was relieved. Owl was a good choice for what 1 had in mind. Owls are the only natural predators of adult skunks. See, some species of owls don't have a sense of smell. If you're going to eat skunks, that's a good thing. I wasn't going to eat adult skunks, of course. I was going to try to find some skunk babies. less-than Wish I could go with you guyseagreater-than Tobias said. less-than But I'm not much use at night. greater-than "You found us the way to get into this place," Jake said. "And you got us the termite to morph." "And we're just so amazingly grateful," Marco said sarcasticall
y. We all laughed nervously. It was good to know that the others were all as scared as I was. We all started to remove our outer clothing. We wore our morphing suits underneath -- a collection of bike shorts, leotards, and T-shirts. We can morph skintight clothing, but not things like sweaters or shoes or watches. Jake wore a pair of bike shorts and a sort of spandex top. Marco snickered. "What?" Jake demanded. Marco put on an innocent face. "Nothing. Nothing. I'm just saying if we're going to be su-perheroes we need to do something about these stupid outfits. We look like refugees from a Bulgarian gymnastics competition. That's all I'm saying." "Except for Rachel, of course," I pointed out. Naturally, Rachel had found a way to coordinate her outfit. She looked great. "Here's the plan," Jake said. "We morph owls to get close. We demorph at least two hundred yards away from the compound. Then we crawl close, morph termites, dig under the force field, and enter the termite holes in the outside of the building." "As long as it's nice and simple," Rachel said darkly. She looked at me, and I realized that even fearless Rachel was afraid. That scared me. I tried to focus entirely on assuming the owl morph. But my brain was buzzing away. You know how sometimes you can't stop your brain from just racing around? It's like a computer that's playing a dozen programs at once. I was worrying about too many things comab my science project, lying to my parentseawhether Ax really tried drinking engine oileawhether the baby skunks had already beenkilled Maybe it was self-defense. I didn't want to start worrying about the thing that really worried me. Somehow my life had turned very, very weird. I saw Ax was morphing quickly. His tail went limp, like an empty sock. Feathers were growing to replace his fur. I looked down at my own arm and saw the feather patterns being drawn on my skin. They were beautiful, really, if you didn't stop to think about them being on you. You could see the quill, a gently curved shaft. From it the thousands of individual vanes spread. Then, quite suddenly, the feather-drawing became three-dimensional. They seemed to simply pop out of my skin. It itched a little as the feathers grew out, all across my body. I was shrinking all the while. Getting smaller and smaller. The dirt and pine needles and leaves and twigs all came rushing up at me. My bare feet grew rough, as if they were one big callous. Toes melted together, then formed into talons. Long, curved, sharp, tearing claws grew. The talons were the main killing weapon of the great horned owl. An owl would fly along, silent in the night. Then it would strike, grabbing the prey -- a rabbit, a squirrel, a rat, a skunk -- by the head. . . . The bones all through my body were rearranging themselves. Many disappeared altogether. Others became twisted and misshapen. My breast bone grew deeper. My various finger bones grew longer first, then shorter. All of this made a grinding noise that resonated up through my body. My internal organs were radically redesigned. And my eyes seemed to swell and swell till they filled my entire head. My eyes were so huge compared to my body that they practically rubbed together inside my skull. Suddenly, it was no longer night. It was as bright as day. The amount of light that was a dim, flickering candle to my human eyes was a spotlight to my owl's eyes. less-than Whoaffgreater-than I heard Rachel cry. less-than like enjoy these eyes very mucheagreater-than Ax commented. less-than They are wonderful. greater-than I spread my arms wide and opened my wings. The change was complete. I felt the cold edge of the owl's instincts. The instincts of a predator. I had morphed the owl before, so I knew what to expect. I had used the eyes and the wings and felt the brain. It wasn't exactly second nature, but at least it wasn't a surprise. less-than Ready8greater-than Jake asked. I flapped my wings and drew up my feet and rose easily into the tree branches that, in the darkness, were invisible to humans, but clear as blazing neon to me. I saw Tobias sitting perched on his branch. I felt his instinctive hawk's caution as a flight of five horned owls flew past. The day belonged to the hawks. But night was ours. less-than Good luckeagreater-than Tobias said. less-than Don't eat anything I wouldn't eat. greater-than less-than Hah-haheagreater-than Marco laughed. He was high on the thrill of a good morph. So was I, I guess. There is a rush of power that comes from being an animal in its natural element. Particularly a predator. In the air at night, nothing could touch us. We reigned supreme in the forest. We flew in a loose formation, not soaring above the trees, but flitting through them. Our wings didn't make a s ound. An owl's wings are as carefully designed as the wings of the most advanced stealth fighter. More, really. The feathers are designed not to flutter or ruffle as the owl glides through the still night air. Frightened mice, listening for any possible danger, hear nothing at all as the owl swoops down for the kill. As well as I could see, I could also hear everything. I could hear as well as the wolves. As we flew to what might be our destruction, I tried to focus on my other goal -- listening for the cries of skunk kits. Watching the ground below for the waddling, shuffling walk of a lost baby skunk. less-than This is so weirdeagreater-than Marco said. less-than like love this part. It's the next part I'm not looking forward to at all. greater-than less-than lt'll be okayeagreater-than Jake said. less-than Yeah, I mean, what could possibly go wrong8greater-than Rachel asked dryly. I swooped and zoomed through the trees. All the while I watched the ground below me and focused my hearing, and in that way I reached the Yeerk compound without having to think too much about what was coming next. CHAPTE R 11 less-than TTI-MOST thereeagreater-than Jake said. less-than Another couple of minutes. greater-than Even in thought-speak I could hear the tension in his voice. I felt something like a cold hand squeezing my heart. Then . . . A noise. A noise against a background of noises. But this noise was one that the owl's brain wanted to hear. A noise the owl's brain had evolved to notice. The sound of helplessness. The sound of a weak creature. Weak, tiny, helpless babies. There! It was coming from a hole that no other animal would have seen in the pitch-black of night. A hole dug beneath the roots of a thorn-bush. Four... no, five separate voices. were they the skunk kits? Maybe. I couldn't be sure. But it was night, and they sounded like they were alone. It could be. I looked around, swiveling my owl's neck. I tried to form a picture of the place. The trees. The outcropping of rocks just twenty feet away. I wanted to be able to find the place again. If I was still around to find anything. The mewling sound of the babies reached something inside me. Inside the human Cassie. But to the owl it was the sound of a meal. It's strange to have those two feelings in your head at the same time -- human compassion and the cold ruthlessness of the predator. Strange. less-than Okayeagreater-than Jake said, a few seconds later. less-than Here. greater-than We swooped low and landed. I started to de-morph quickly. I didn't want to feel that predator in my mind anymore. Not right then. The world went dark as my human eyes reemerged. The forest was a darker, quieter place to Homo sapiens. I looked around and couldn't see any of the landmarks I'd tried to spot. I would never find those skunk kits in the dark. Not with human eyes, anyway. Maybe by the light of day. I could come back in the morning. If. . . "Okay, we have to get as close to the edge of that compound as we can," Jake whispered. "We can't be spotted as humans. But we can't morph termites too far from the building. Termites don't exactly move fast." less-than like have a suggestion, Prince Jakeeagreater-than Ax said. Ax is under the impression that Jake is the equivalent of an Andalite prince. less-than A distractioneagreater-than he continued. less-than We could give the Yeerks something to chase. greater-than I knew instantly what he had in mind. "An Andalite?" I asked him. less-than The Yeerks would not be able to resisteagreater-than he said. "You could end up very dead that way," Marco said. "No, Ax," Jake said. "We need you inside. There may be Yeerk computers in there. We need you. But a distraction isn't a bad idea." Jake looked at me. "Anyone want to volunteer? It would probably be safer than going inside." He was offering me a way out. A way to avoid having to become a termite. I should have said yes. I wanted to say yes. But I couldn't do it. I couldn't take the easier way out. "Okay, we draw straws. All except Ax. He goes in, regardless." Jake pulled up four strands of tall grass. He shortened them all to about six inches. Then, he took one and shortened it further. "Short straw plays tag with the Y
eerks." He concealed the bottoms of the straws in his fist. "Next time let's play some other game," Marco said as he drew a straw. "Yahtzee, maybe. I don't like games that involve life and death." One after the other, we each drew a straw. A long straw. I looked carefully at the straw in my hand. Yes, it was a long one. Jake looked shocked. He held the short straw. We were all shocked. Somehow it just seemed automatic that Jake would be there with us. Marco grinned. "Sooner or later we had to try a mission without you, oh great and fearless leader." Marco could joke about it. But none of us felt right going in without Jake. Now it was too late to change that. "Okay," Jake said briskly. "You guys know what to do. I'll use the wolf morph. The Yeerks will be on the lookout for wolves." He started to walk away. Then he stopped and looked back. "Be careful, all right?" "Go ahead, Mom," Rachel said. "We can handle this." "At least we hope we can," I muttered. Jake walked away and was quickly out of sight. "Okay, we have to be ready as soon as Jake starts making trouble," Rachel said. "We hear something go down, we run toward the perimeter of the compound, staying just back in the trees, morph, and hope we can find the way to the building." less-than What do you know about these termites we are morph ing8greater-than Ax wondered. "They're like ants," Marco said. "Actually, they're related to cockroaches," I said. "I looked them up in one of my mom's books. They have a society like ants, but roaches are closer relatives. They eat cellulose -- the stuff in wood. Bacteria in their guts digest the wood. The worker termites . . . they, urn, they eliminate their waste. And the soldier termites kind of eat it. I think, judging from the termite Tobias brought us, that we are going to be mor-phing soldier termites." The three of them were staring at me, looking a little sick. "Well, Ax wanted to know," I said. A light! "Look!" I hissed. "Way off through the woods. That must be on the far side of the compound. The spotlights just went on." We could hear the sounds of human voices yelling. And then, the wild, defiant howl of a wolf. "That's it. Let's rock," Rachel said. We ran toward the compound. We ran, hunched low, scurrying from tree to bush. Then, as we got still closer, we dropped down and crawled on all fours. I heard shouting and the eerie zap of Dracon beams being fired. "i hope he's okay," I whispered. I didn't think anyone could hear me. But Ax said, less-than Prince Jake is very smart. He will be fine. greater-than "Do you guys think we're close enough now?" Marco wondered. We were closer than we had been the day before. Just a few feet from the edge of the clearing. All of us hunched down behind one large tree trunk. Even Ax, which, in his normal state, is awkward for him. We huddled close, like some big group hug. When we morphed we would become tiny. And even a few feet between us would seem like a mile. "Time to go termite," Rachel said. She had her arm around my back. I was already sick with fear. Afraid for Jake. Afraid for my friends. Afraid of the very thing I was about to become. "Can I just say that this sucks?" I muttered. "Amen," Marco agreed. We were shoulder to shoulder. My head touched his. And then, as my very bones rattled and my teeth chattered from fear, I began the process that would dissolve my bones, and melt away my teeth. Down, down, down. Falling . . . falling forever. It was like I had jumped off the Empire State Building and was falling. Yet even though I fell, I never quite hit the ground. I was going from a girl of less than five feet to an insect less than a quarter of an inch long. I was becoming something that could have crawled inside my own ear. Already the others who had been so close seemed to be a long way off. With my eyes still mostly human, I could see Rachel's face lose its features, and bulge out. I saw the monstrously big mandibles spring like black, sideways tusks from her mouth. And then, my eyes went dark. I was blind. And I was glad. andbrvbarbbFT J. couldn't see, but I could feel the antennae as they extruded from my forehead. I couldn't see, but I could feel the extra set of legs growing from my sides. I could sense, rather than see, that my head was huge compared to the rest of my body. I could sense that I had a swollen abdomen. I could feel the massive pincers where my mouth had been. I wanted to scream. I wanted to scream so badly, but I no longer had a voice. I no longer had a tongue. I was less than a quarter of an inch long. I was as long as any two or three letters on this page. Grains of sand were the size of bowling balls to me. With my wildly waving feelers I could sense a huge, long shaft, like a fallen log. It was over my head. I slowly realized that it was a single pine needle. I waited for the termite's instincts and mind to suddenly surge within my own. But the termite brain -- such as it was -- wasn't saying anything. It was totally silent. My senses brought me almost nothing. I was blind. I could feel vibrations from sound, but they were vague. The termite's sense of "hearing" was not as good as its relative, the cockroach. I knew. I had been a cockroach. All I had was a sense of smell. Or something like smell that came from my antennae waving in the air. less-than Everyone okay8greater-than I asked shakily. I desperately wanted to talk to someone. Anyone. I needed to know the others were alive. less-than Yeaheagreater-than Rachel answered. less-than like guess I am okay. It's just that I can't see anything. greater-than less-than Termites are blind, except for the queens and kingseagreater-than I said. I must have sounded much calmer than I felt. less-than These are very strange creatureseagreater-than Ax commented. less-than like feel no instincts. It's as if they are just a body. A machines less-than Weli, let's get these bodies outta hereeagreater-than Marco said. less-than Sooner or later the Yeerks are going to get tired of chasing Jake around the woods. greater-than less-than Which way8greater-than Rachel asked. less-than Slight problem -- we're totally blind. greater-than less-than like . . . maybe I'm crazy, but I get this sense . . . this feeling . . . like something is calling to meeagreater-than I explained. less-than Okay, maybeeagreater-than Marco said. less-than like have the same feeling. Like someone yelling from a long way off. greater-than less-than Let's follow that. Whatever it iseagreater-than Rachel said. less-than lt's as good a direction as any. greater-than I set out toward the vague, distant voice. I had no idea if the others were going in the same direction. I guess they were all within a few inches of me, but I couldn't tell. The termite legs were not very strong or very fast. Not as fast as an ant's. I could feel the rocks I was climbing over. Or the grains of dirt, I guess they were. They felt like rocks, anyway. Jagged, sharp-edged crystals, seemingly as big as a human head. I motored on all six legs, trying hard not to think about anything but moving forward. Just keep moving, I told myself. Don't think about how small and defenseless you are. less-than Hey. I feel somethingeagreater-than Rachel said. less-than lt's ... I guess it must be the edge of the force field. greater-than At the same time I reached the force field myself. I felt it as a tingling hum that vibrated my tiny body. I could feel the rocks around me vibrating. I could feel the very air around me dancing. less-than At least we're going in the right directions Marco pointed out. I moved closer to the invisible wall of snapping, humming power. Suddenly I realized my legs were just motoring away but I wasn't going anywhere. less-than We will have to dig under xeagreater-than Ax said. less-than lt will stop at the top layer of dirt. greater-than less-than Does someone know how to make these pathetic bodies dig8greater-than Rachel asked snappishly. I flattened myself down and tried wiggling between two big grains of dirt. It didn't work. Then I sensed one of those hugely long logs suspended in the air not far away. A pine needle. I shuffled over toward it. The pine needle was close to the ground, but there was still plenty of room for me beneath it. less-than Heyffgreater-than I yelled, genuinely excited. less-than Find a pine needle or something that crosses the line. I think maybe there's no force field directly beneath them. greater-than less-than Yeseagreater-than Ax agreed. less-than The pine needle may cast a shadow in the force field. greater-than I reached up for the pine needle with my an- tennae and felt my way along beneath it. I could feel the tingly edges of the force field on either side of me. But the pine needle did cast a sort of shadow. And within that shadow, I could squeeze through. less-than l'm throughffgreater-than I said. At the same time, I became aware that the vague, far-off "voice" I'd heard calling to me was much stronger. For a weird moment I ac
tually thought it was my mother's voice. And I wanted to go toward it. I moved my six legs and headed across the landscape of dirt boulders. I was sure where I was going now. I could hear the voice in my head. I could hear the call. My termite body seemed to be moving on its own now. It was like I was a passenger in a car that someone else was driving. less-than ls everyone through8greater-than I asked. less-than Yeseagreater-than Rachel said. She sounded distracted to me. Like she was listening to someone else and didn't want me interrupting. But that was okay, because I didn't really want to talk to her, either. I quickly covered the ground to the building. I didn't see that it was the building, you understand. I just knew. And the terrible thing is, I never even paused to wonder how I knew. less-than What are we . . . greater-than Marco's voice. He didn't finish his thought. I didn't care. less-than Guys8greater-than Rachel asked. less-than Um . . . greater-than The opening was just ahead. I knew it was there. I knew that other soldier termites would be guarding the entrance. I felt no fear. I clambered up from the dirt into the tunnel opening. Familiar smells. Smells I knew. Home. Home. My place. Where I was from, and where I belonged. I smelled the other soldiers with my antennae. They touched me with their antennae, as I did to them. We were of the colony. The colony. I raced swiftly down the tunnel. It headed upward at a sharp angle, but the angle meant little to me. I weighed practically nothing. A worker was ahead of me. It extruded a pellet of digested cellulose. Wood pulp. I quickly gobbled it up. Within the wood pulp food there were messages. Hormones passing through the colony, containing information. Vague orders. Indistinct yet powerful instructions. I was now caught up in a rush of workers off to obey the voiceless voice in their heads. Some were off to chew a new tunnel. Others were off to the egg chamber to rotate the eggs. And I had my orders, too. I raced along tunnels lined with chewed and digested wood pulp. Tunnels cut through the dried wood that supported the building. I felt side tunnels open on one side, then the next. A tunnel above. Air flowed faint -- but fresh -- actually creating a tiny breeze. There was no light. None. But it didn't matter because I was blind. I was blind, but I was not lost. What am I doing? an alien voice asked. I ignored it. NO! the voice cried. I had heard the voice before. But it came from far away and it spoke a language I didn't understand. NO! NO! NO! Let me go! I felt a queasy, sickening feeling inside me. But still I powered down the tunnel, turning here, turning there. Always moving toward a goal. There was a powerful smell. It was growing stronger and stronger. I went to it. I had to go to it. NO! Let me go! Let me go! Down the black tunnels. Over and through the packed rush-hour streams of workers. To the center. To the core. To the heart. Help me! Help me! the voice screamed. The voice ... my voice. The faint, failing voice of the human named Cassie. Me. Me! Ahhhhhhhhh! Suddenly, I was Cassie again. I knew my name. I knew who I was. But it no longer mattered. The termite body was out of my control. A stronger will than mine was guiding it. The termite suddenly emerged into a vast, open space. A space that in reality was no more than two or three inches across. And yet it felt like an auditorium to me. Suddenly I knew who had seized control of the termite brain. I knew who had brushed my human mind aside. She was vast. Huge beyond belief. At one end I sensed the termite head and useless, waving termite arms. From that small head and body there extended a monstrous, pulsating sack. As big as a blimp. At the far end was a double row of sticky, slimy eggs, to be picked up and carried away by worker termites. The queen. I was in the chamber of the termite queen. I he queen! I could feel her power. This was her world. These were all her slaves. More than slaves -- they had no will of their own. I knew who I was again. But I felt weak and pathetic. I was unable to control the termite body I was in. That body belonged to her. She had orders for me -- protect the egg-carrying worker termites. The orders came in smells and vague feelings, but they were impossible to refuse. less-than Racheleagreater-than I called. less-than Marco. Ax. greater-than less-than like . . . greater-than It was Rachel's thought-speak voice. less-than like ... I ... Oh, no. No! Noffgreater-than less-than Rachel! It's the queen. She's controlling ueagreater-than I said. less-than like can't... my body ... it just. . . greater-than less-than Marco! Marco can you hear me? Marcoffgreater-than less-than She's got me. I can't say no. I can't stopffgreater-than he cried in anguished response. My own body motored away on its six legs. I fell in step behind two workers. Each was carrying one of the gooey, precious eggs. I had to protect them. There might be enemies. We walked along the grotesque length of the queen. Toward her head. Ants. They were the enemy. Sometimes they came. Sometimes they poured down the tunnels, looking for the eggs, to carry them off for food. Sometimes they attacked the queen herself. The soldiers fought them. The soldiers sometimes died fighting them. less-than The queenffgreater-than Rachel's voice said. less-than The only way . . . destroy the queen. greater-than It was like an electric jolt in my mind! Get rid of the queen! Yes. The only way. They wouldn't be expecting that. There would be no one to stop me! But my body was not my own. I could not make it... The two workers plodded along before me. I could feel their hind ends with my feelers. And I knew the queen's head was just to my right. Just a half inch. Less. The queen's head . . . feelers . . . eyes . . . like an ant! One chance . . . focus . . . focus ... I had to trick the termite mind. I had to draw on every ounce of my strength . If I failed, I would live out the rest of my life as a mindless slave of the termite queen. Now! Do it now! I swerved right. It was like moving through molasses. The queen had ordered me to go after the workers, and I was disobeying. Ant! Ant! I screamed the word in my own head. Ant! Destroy! Destroy! Destroy the ant! I clambered over a half dozen termites who were tending the queen. backslash could feel my will weakening. I couldn't get rid of the queen. I had to kill an ant. That was my purpose -- to keep ants away from the queen. I scampered toward the queen's head. I felt my antennae touch her. I opened my massive pincerjaws. . . . Termites ran around insanely. They were racing, out of control, lost, confused. For a moment I did the same. The queen was gone. I think in some way I wanted to forget who I was. What I had done. I wanted to become one of the lost, panicked termites. less-than We're free! We're out! Cassie, where are you? Get out of thereffgreater-than I heard a far-off voice cry. Was it Ax? Marco? Rachel? less-than Demorphffgreater-than I cried with my last shred of control. less-than No! Cassie, noffgreater-than a voice screamed in my head. less-than You're inside a piece of woodffgreater-than less-than Demorphffgreater-than I screamed again. Human. I wanted to be human again. Let me be human! Let me out of this place. Out of this body. I grew. Walls pressed in around me. I filled the tunnel. I couldn't grow anymore! Trapped! Pain. Nothing but pain! I was a swollen, vast termite. Larger than any queen. Huge. I couldn't grow anymore. And I couldn't stop. I was trying to become human again, to fit a human body into a space no bigger than the inside of a walnut. Then . . . explosion! The walls opened up. Splinters! Fresh air rushed across my hard termite skin. My head was free of the wood and growing. But my body was still trapped. Squeezing with terrible pain. I had eyes now. They could see, but only dimly. I was still tiny, and in the air above me a huge blade as long as a passenger jet slashed downward. The wood splintered again and my body was free. I grew and grew. Arms . . . legs ... my own head. I was on my knees on a wooden floor. Marco and Rachel stood over me. Ax had used his tail to slice open the wood. They had all escaped the colony. They had demorphed. It was dark in the room, but there were glowing red-and-green indicator lights. And there was a computer monitor showing neat screen-saver triangles floating and reforming. "Are you okay?" Rachel asked. She bent down and put her hand on my shoulder. I gave her a hug. Then, just as suddenly, I pushed her away. "Let me go! Don't touch me! Don't touch me! DON'T TOUCH ME!" Rachel was on me in a flash. She clamped her hand over my mouth. Marco grabbed my ankles and held them still. "Cassie!" Rachel hissed. "Shut up. We're inside the Yeerk building. We're in a side room, but we can hear people in the next room!" I was beyond caring. I struggled and fought and tried to scream. "Ax, whatever you can do with that computer, do
it!" Marco whispered urgently. Rachel and Marco held me pinned against the floor. And slowly . . . very slowly ... my bunched muscles relaxed. I stopped fighting. "Are you okay now?" Rachel asked. Okay? I would never be okay again. But I nodded my head anyway. Rachel took her hand away from my mouth. "It's over, Cassie," Marco said. "You saved us. It's over. And we have other problems now." "I'm good," I said. "I'm fine." But my skin was crawling. Evil, terrible memories were crowding in on me. less-than like have accesseagreater-than Ax said. less-than Accessing. Urn ... Marco or Rachel, I need a human to help me understand the meaning of what I am seeing here.greater-than Marco climbed up off the floor. Rachel stayed with me. She was stroking my hair, like my mom would have done if I'd had a nightmare. It was hard to think of Rachel as being nurturing. But she did the right thing. I heard sounds in the next room. Human voices. And Hork-Bajir, speaking their weird mix of their own native tongue and human speech they'd learned for duty on Earth. "Some kind of commission," Marco mused, looking at the computer screen. "Three members. They vote on what happens to the forest. They decide if the logging can go forward." less-than Dapsen Lumber Companyeagreater-than Ax said. less-than That's what the Yeerks call this logging company. Very funny. greater-than "What's funny?" Marco asked. less-than Dapsen. It's a Yeerkish word that means . . . well. Never mind what it means. It isn't polite. greater-than "Look at this document," Marco whispered. ""Preliminary permission to examine feasibility of. . . " Hey. The Yeerks don't have final permission to begin logging. There's this commission that still has to decide. Three people. One has already said yes. Probably a Controller. One has voted definitely no. There's one guy left. Some guy named Farrand. Yikes!" "What yikes?" Rachel asked. "Yikes, as in he's coming for a visit to check the scene," Marco said. "End of the week. Then he'll vote. If that guy votes yes, the Yeerks are in business and we're in trouble." "He'll vote yes," Rachel said darkly. less-than l'm afraid that is trueeagreater-than Ax agreed. less-than The Yeerks will make him a Controllers "Not if we stop them," Marco said. "One thing at a time. We need to get out of here," Rachel said. "And we're not going back out the way we came in." No one argued with that. less-than like am making a slight change in the programming that may let me access this computer from Marco's home computer. And I can temporarily shut down the defenses from this computers Ax said. less-than But there are still guards outside. And Hork-Bajir in the next room. greater-than "Yeah. We'll have to move fast," Rachel said. "Cassie, can you morph? Can you morph the wolf? I'll stay right beside you the whole time." Could I morph? The very idea made me sick. But even in my quaking fear I knew anything was better than going back down into that termite colony. Five minutes later, Ax turned off the outer defenses, and we ran from that building. I guess the Yeerks counted on their high-tech defenses too much. Without them, no one even shouted an alarm. By sheer, dumb luck we raced between the paths of two Controller guards. No one yelled. No one fired a shot. We ran into the woods where Jake joined up with us. No one said much on the way home. C plus plus -B-P T -E -R