Unwilling: a shifter romance

by Hannah L. Corrie

  Carl stumbled and moved back, spitting a glob of blood as he circled around Jared's car. This wasn't right. Carl was supposed to fight, not flee, but Jared's battle-heated mind had a hard time concentrating on strategy. He followed, tensing his arms in anticipation of an attack. A few pebbles dropped out of the abrasions on his arms, but he suspected he'd still be in a world of pain later. If there was a later.

  No, if he was to have the ghost of a chance of winning, he had to get Carl to attack, to give up his guarded stance. To stop him from assessing Jared's strengths and weaknesses. To get him mad enough to throw technique into the wind and give in to rage.

  "Darwin told me you were a crazy fuck, but he forgot to mention you're a spineless ninny! What's with all the running away, afraid you'll lose?" he retorted, keeping up with Carl's shuffling backsteps and pressuring him through speed. Not enough speed to make Carl stop and face him, but enough to keep him backing up, walking backwards, retreating. Carl's grin was already wavering, broken by the need to look back ever so often as they reached the edge of the lawn surrounding the parking area and access road.

  Unfortunately, the taunting didn't work. Jared bared his teeth. This would need a low blow, something so evil that even Carl couldn't give it a pass. Darwin would have slapped him for this, but it had to be done.

  "Doesn't matter, we all know you're weak. No Alpha worth his salt would have let himself be taken for a ride by a submissive. For years, Carl! I mean, how does a thing like that even happen? Even I knew that Darwin was a submissive within ten minutes of meeting him. And to think, here you were, trying so, so hard and still failing so miserably, no wonder your wife left—"

  That did it. Carl stormed forward, screaming inhumanly and clawing at him like a madman. Jared tried to punch him, to derail him with sheer force, but it didn't work. His forehead met Jared's face with a loud crack and both of them fell, spouting blood as they grappled for the upper hand. Dust filled the air as they rolled back onto the access road and from one moment to the next, Jared found himself on top of a struggling, coughing Carl. He instinctively grabbed on and his claws found purchase, burrowing into Carl's ribs with a wet sound. The flesh between his fingers twitched and shivered, tightening around his fingertips and effectively trapping his hand as Carl arched up and swiped Jared's throat with his own claws, rending open his flesh and spraying the ground with blood.

  The pain was immediate but short, dampened to a dull throb by adrenaline. Gasping, Jared threw himself backwards, ripping out his claws and a few clumps of Carl's flesh in the process. A sharp gasp for air proved that Carl had missed the most vital parts on his neck, but the relief was wiped away as Carl tore after him, all but crawling onto him as he again targeted his throat, grasping and grabbing and cutting his chest to ribbons in the process. Jared grabbed the next best part of Carl, kicked up his knee and flipped them, coughing up a glob of blood as he struggled against the bulky man.

  They rolled through the dirt, both clawing at each other as they painted the gravel red, but whatever prowess Jared had thought himself to have, Carl still beat him. When they came to a stop, Jared landed on his back with Carl's claws around his neck, gargling and gasping as those fingers tightened. Needle-sharp claws slowly bore into his skin, digging deeper and deeper as he pushed against Carl's arms, trying to reach his face, trying to get to his eyes, anything to break free. Gray spots danced through his vision as Carl broke through his trachea with a wet, popping, oddly hollow noise.

  Jared's claws scratched across stubble and Carl twitched a little. His chin. Blood sprayed out of Jared's neck and everything went dark, his fingers cold, his chest heavy and hot. Jared knew he was dying, right here, right now. But dying like this was a last act of vilification that Carl would carry with him for the rest of his dishonorable existence. Just a little bit higher. You can do it. Do it for Rayne, Darla. He stopped pushing against Carl's arms, squealing as the older man's claws all but squashed his throat and punctured his neck veins and throat. It didn't matter, not anymore. Jared twisted his shoulders, reached forward and punched his spread claws into whatever part of Carl's face he could find.

  His claws met resistance, then ripped through it, and all of a sudden the weight from his chest disappeared. Strange, wailing, gurgling screams filled the night, then a set of gun shots tore through the darkness and the screaming stopped.

  Then nothing.

  Darwin

  A dream. It had to be a dream.

  The stench of blood and entrails overpowered the biting sting of gunpowder, but the sulfuric odor stuck to him even after he dropped the gun to grab Jared's neck instead. Blood was pouring out of it, the only sign that he even had a neck left to bleed out of. He tried to keep the blood in, to somehow will the flow to stop with simple pressure. Darwin knew that it was useless with wounds like this, that either Jared was strong enough to heal what had been so thoroughly shredded, or not, but it didn't matter. He couldn't sit idly by. He had never been able to watch when he could help.

  "Please don't die. Please don't," he whispered to the gasping, twitching leftovers of the man he loved. The pain in his chest was back, but different than before. It didn't feel like an impending shift, nothing like that panic he had felt back in Banes or the roadhouse. It was pain, too much pain to scream, too much to cry or call for help. Nobody could fix this. Nobody but Jared.

  People ran and shouted around them, Margo's pack probably, doing what they could. Harry yelled inside the cabin and the chugging sounds of cars pulling into the parking area filled the background with white noise. Jared gasped and gurgled, fighting for another breath as his body twisted and twitched. His skin shivered and boiled, then quieted down again.

  "He is trying to shift, that's good," a faceless voice said. Darwin moved his index finger to cover a hole spewing hot, sticky blood over the back of his hand. Someone tugged at his shoulder, but Darwin ignored it. Whatever they wanted, it would have to wait.

  More voices, more tugging. The blood started to dry, sticking his hands to Jared's gored neck and Darwin frowned indecisively. What if him sticking fingers into Jared's body was slowing down the healing process? But could he let go? Would Jared's body heal fast enough to close the gashes and holes before he bled out?

  Arms twisted around his chest and shoulders, putting him in a headlock and ripping his hands away from Jared's neck as he was dragged backwards, screaming and kicking. More hands appeared, catching and restraining his legs as he was pushed to the ground. Something thin and tight was slipped around his wrists and ankles, tightened to the point of pain. A solid, warm weight settled on his back, but still Darwin used breath to scream.

  "No no no no no! You're killing him!"

  "It's useless, he's gone feral," someone shouted, then a needle pierced Darwin's arm and warmth flooded his body, burning against his eye sockets and finally wiping away everything.

  Family Issues

  Darwin

  A sea of blood filled the small room, splashing first against the trim seaming the edges of the wooden floor, then up against the wall sockets and licking against the frame of the bed, and in a glimpse swallowing even that. The room fell away abruptly, unveiling an ink-black, endless sky. Gasping for air, Darwin treaded the thick, luke-warm sea to keep himself afloat, retching at the sticky, satiny feel of liquid life against his body. Black sky, black, bloody sea, nothing as far as the eye could see. He was drowning, he knew it, but knowing didn't make giving up any easier. Giving up was never easy.

  "... no, he isn't. And you standing in my way doesn't-"

  Darwin knew that voice, but he hadn't expected to hear it ever again. Something brushed against his leg, a wet, slippery touch that made him squeak and swim harder, towards it, towards that faint knowledge of safety. Each breath through his mouth brought another sickly wave of that rich taste of meat with it, making him spit and retch.

  "Last warning. He is mine!"

  A thunderclap echoed over the vast sea, followed by a sharp, painfully bright lightning
flash. A tiny rowboat bobbed on the thick waves, looking forlorn and foreboding and dry as old driftwood. Darwin grabbed the rim and pulled himself inside with a groan and shivering muscles, swallowing against the rocking motion. Waves lapped against the wooden sides, low, dry, drum beats in the pitch black. The boat was warm, so warm,— too warm.

  Darwin awoke with a jolt and a scream, slapping the arms holding him. His wolf snarled through his head, hovering just below his skin, ready to burst out at the blink of an eye. His attacker grunted, tightened his grip to the point of pain and buried Darwin's face in a soft shirt and against a taut chest. Darwin took one deep breath, initially to scream again, but the scent filling his nose stopped him mid-gasp. Then he threw his arms around that muscular, hard chest and sobbed. Jared's scent. It wafted through Darwin's brain like a lifeline, driving away the last, dark tendrils of whatever nightmare he had been stuck in. The wolf retreated but hovered in the background, as wary as Darwin felt disjointed.

  "Shh. I'm here, I'm alive. Calm down."

  Jared's throat sounded sore. It was the most beautiful sound Darwin had ever heard. He tried to say something but whatever words he tried to utter came out as a jumbled, snot-riddled mess, soaking Jared's shirt and rubbing his throat raw. Jared hugged him tighter and crawled onto the bed with him, pulling him against his body and bathing him in the scent of home. And pain. Jared stunk of it, and of blood. And death. His wolf didn't like it, but trying to melt into Jared met his approval. Darwin dug his hands into that soft shirt, just to be sure he was really there, really alive, and even then he kept his head pressed against Jared's chest to listen to his heartbeat. Images of Jared's gored neck, the blood on Darwin's grasping fingers, those wet, raspy gasps for air, tried to come back, but Darwin drove them away by clutching tighter and tighter to the garment. Only Jared's pained grunt made him let up.

  "Am I hurting you?" Darwin croaked, sniveling through snot and swollen eyes.

  A huff of hot breath rustled through his hair but Jared didn't answer, just jerked his head to the sides. Not a denial, but a clear enough invitation to keep hugging him like this, no matter the pain it caused. His fingers left hot little dents on Darwin's back, digging in and easing up again, dancing to the tune of whatever emotions had struck him silent. Whatever drugs had taken Darwin down and into that scary blood-sea still cursed through his body, slowing down the world and leaving a faintly metallic flavor on his dry tongue. Still, that scent and Jared's body heat, his oh so low sniffling, felt like a soothing blanket for his mind. The rush of love coursing through Darwin was almost too much, almost too strong, just this side from torture. Remnants of fear bristled every hair on his body, made him want to run. But he couldn't, didn't want to leave again, risk losing Jared again. So many questions danced through his head, so many truths he wanted to ask about and didn't want answered at the same time, it was choking him. What could he say? What should he say?

  No confession, no profession of deep, profound realizations could ever measure up to the turmoil inside him. The tension was killing them both and it had to go. With that realization, Darwin knew exactly what to say.

  "You're crying, aren't you. How un-manly."

  "No I'm not. And fuck you for scaring me," Jared mumbled, congested and teary as he fought back a laugh and held Darwin tighter. Darwin's wolf forced a happy grunt out of his lips and relaxed a little.

  Someone was thumping against the door, muttering curses at Jared for locking it, demanding to be let in, proclaiming the danger of being alone in there, alone with 'him'. The words didn't make much sense to Darwin's spinning mind. It was such an easy thing not to pay attention to the beating and hollering, to wrap himself in Jared's scent and voice and warmth instead, to listen to his heartbeat and to the soft, woolen creak of the bandages tensing against their own layers whenever Jared readjusted himself. His mate was here, his Alpha, he would take care of everything. No need for vigilance.

  "Go away," Jared barked hoarsely towards the door and proceeded to bury his face in Darwin's hair, huffing warm air against his scalp. "They've been keeping me at bay for three days, saying you'd gone feral. That you'd attack me because I smell like prey, with the wounds and all. That you wouldn't know it was me you attacked if I went in here," he grumbled and giggled a little. "At first I let them, mostly because I was too weak to come here on my own, but I decided that this was stupid and they don't know you as well as I do. And I'd rather be mauled by you than stay away any longer."

  Darwin kept quiet as he examined the words in his mind. His wolf didn't pay much attention to them, happy to stay in the now, in that cloud of happiness in Jared's proximity.

  His wolf. Wait, my wolf?

  Darwin tensed and shuddered, closed his eyes more tightly and tried to remember how to breathe. His wolf was there, right there, aware and connected but way too close, too big. How hadn't he become aware of its proximity sooner?

  Jared rubbed his back, sending tingles through his tense flesh. "Shh, breathe. Everything is alright. Think calm, breathe calm, or you'll shift again. Like that, yes."

  Each breath burned through his throat, ballooning his lung too forcefully and hissing out in a huff. Listening and acting accordingly felt like a monumental task, tiring and useless, but the longer he did it, the less his skin tingled. The sharp pains in his gums receded and the blood pounding in his ears lessened. When all he could hear was his own pitiful rasping, Darwin closed his eyes and ground his teeth.

  "Guess they're right about the feral thing," he said with a voice still not quite his own.

  Jared relaxed his hold on Darwin and continued rubbing his back, shrugging awkwardly. "I don't care. If you go all feral, I'll buy a dog bed big enough for both of us. We could move deep into the mountains, just you and me. Be done with all this drama and just live our lives. I won't let you down again, I simply won't."

  Something dark and fearful bubbled up from the depths of Darwin's memory and he tensed. He spoke before he was sure he wanted an answer. "Even though I deserted you?"

  "Even though."

  Something broke inside Darwin's chest and all of a sudden he was crying again, clutching and clawing at Jared's shirt as he sobbed loudly through the void the fear left in his chest. The last tendrils of darkness fled his body with those sounds, hurting his head just as his heart stopped aching. And all through his breakdown, Jared held him, soothed him and kept his mouth shut. Even the hammering on the door stopped, finally leaving them to themselves.

  After a while, the urge to shift disappeared completely and Darwin realized how wet Jared's shirt had gotten. He pulled away belatedly, patting the dark patches clumsily as he blinked his swollen eyes. "Sorry about that," he muttered, sniffling.

  "Don't worry about it," Jared murmured, rubbing endless circles on his back. "How much do you remember?"

  Darwin winced and his heartbeat sped up. "You dying. Me shooting Carl." Strangely, the thought of Carl did nothing to him, now that he was dead. The memory of Jared's pale-blue face and the gushing wound still threatened to make him sick, though.

  Jared nodded. "That was three days ago. They tranqed you like a rabid dog and pulled you off me because you wouldn't let their medic take over and kept screaming at everyone. You shifted and went a little berserk after that, but luckily the tranq kicked in. At least that's what they told me when I asked them why the hell I couldn't see you. I still think they overreacted, but what can you do? It's done now. Margo had us all taken to her pack house— much more impressive than the roadhouse, by the way— and put you in lockdown. Then they patched me up and—"

  A knock on the door interrupted Jared's tale. It was a much more polite knock than before and it stopped both of them in their tracks. "Who is it?" Jared narrowed his eyes at the offending door.

  "George and Mary. Can we come in?"

  Darwin was off the bed and at the door in a blink. "Dad!" He ripped open the door and all but fell into George's lap, ignoring Mary's shocked squeak. "You're here!"

  George gasp
ed and patted Darwin's back stiffly. "Of course. Where else would I be? My son is hurt, they'd have to use a forklift to keep me away."

  "I threatened to do just that yesterday," Mary snarked and proceeded to roll him into the tiny room. "Good to see you're somewhat sane again, boyo." A short pause, then she offered Jared a curt nod, followed by an icy, "Jared."

  Darwin frowned and hesitantly slipped off his father's lap. Jared was staring at all three of them, his eyes hooded and his face carefully blank. George didn't spare him a single glance and Mary was glowering daggers, if only out of the corner of her eye. Something was off, and in a bad, bad way. Darwin's wolf stiffened at the sheer tension in the room, hackles rising. "Guys? What happened while I was out?"

  Jared got up and patted Darwin's shoulder. "Leave it be for now, they just got you back. I'll be upstairs."

  Darwin stared at Jared's retreating back until the door fell shut, then he knitted his brows at his family. "Okay, what's going on?"

  George didn't hesitate. "When you told me you found a boyfriend, I pictured someone nice and responsible and trustworthy. And what did I find instead? A self-centered, glib little frat-boy with no respect for anyone or anything! Did he tell you that he fought with Margo and almost got kicked out? Or that he punched Graham when he asked if Margo would be willing to do a burial ceremony for Carl?"

  "Please George, calm down," Mary implored, kneading his shoulders as he started to gasp for air. Her eyes found Darwin, silently blaming him as she tried to loosen his tense muscles. "I'm sure Darwin had no idea Jared could be like that. You know he's a good boy, he would never fall for someone's looks alone."

  Darwin swallowed and sat down. The tightness in his chest was back, as was the vertigo. His cells thrummed beneath the low growl of his wolf, the universal warning to back off or else. This was not going like he had imagined it would. Rather, it was almost opposite of what he had hoped for and nowhere close to what he needed right now, unstable as he was. After all, George and Mary were the most important people in his life after Jared. But were they still? As things were going, chances were high that his father would tell him to leave Jared. But could he? He tried to imagine his life without Jared. Without his scent, or his rumbling voice. Without that feeling of utter security and bliss. The growling in his head changed to a high, anxious whining.