“Shit,” Alex muttered and pulled his mouth away from her skin.
She still sat on his lap, confused. What had she done wrong?
“What?”
“This isn’t the right place for this.” He ran a hand through his short-cropped hair, then looked at her a moment. “I intended to give you more time, but I’m having a hard time keeping my hands off you. If you want to stop, say something now. Otherwise, I’m gonna carry you up to the bedroom and finish this.”
She opened her mouth to say take me, but the words didn’t come out. She wanted to ask him to finish it, but the words stuck in her throat. As much as she wanted to say them, they were against everything she’d been told for the first fourteen years of her life. She wasn’t supposed to want this. She was only supposed to endure it because it was her wifely duty.
“Do you want me to stop?”
NO! The voice in her head screamed, but the word wouldn’t come out either. Frustrated with her inability to tell him what she wanted she shook her head hoping he’d understand.
Triumph raced through her when he scooped her in his arms and stood.
“One last chance. Do you want me to take you upstairs?”
Still the words didn’t come so she nodded, wishing she could figure out how to get past this stupid inhibition.
“Thank god.” The words were barely more than a breath as he started for the stairs.
Janie wrapped her arms around his neck and held on. She’d seen his muscles and endurance earlier and she had no doubt he could carry her with no problems, but why risk it?
Chapter 15
Alex had to remind himself not to take the steps two at a time. It would have been a little awkward with Janie in his arms, but she weighed less than some of the pack’s he’d carried for days on end over rough terrain, a quick trip up a single floor of stairs was nothing.
He liked that she didn’t protest or suggest he shouldn’t carry her. He was too impatient to get them to the bedroom to let her walk. Damn. His cock ached to be inside her. It only took a minute before he’d stepped into the bedroom and kicked the door shut behind them. Unable to wait any longer he set her on her feet and met her lips with his again. Alex loved the way she tasted, the way she responded to his every touch. He couldn’t get enough. One hand thrust into her hair, holding her against him, but he didn’t need to. Her arms went around his neck and pulled him down to meet her as she stretched up to him.
Unable to resist the temptation any longer he cupped one breast with his free hand, swiping his thumb over the puckered nipple he felt begging for attention. She moaned and arched against him as if asking for more. More he was happy to give her. She tugged at his shirt. She’d done that before. He wanted to feel her hands on him. Her fingers against his skin, her naked breasts pressing against him.
Alex broke the kiss and peeled his shirt off over his head, tossing it aside as he brought his hands back to her. Her face was flushed, lips swollen from his kiss making his already iron hard dick throb in his jeans. The impression of his zipper was going to be permanent if he didn’t get the damned things off soon. But not yet. It would scare her if he took them off now. He had to go slowly. Even if it killed him.
Tugging at the hem of her shirt, he watched her face for any signs of hesitation. There was none. She unfastened a couple buttons at her collar and kept her eyes on his face as she lifted her blouse off. Once the shirt cleared her head, her hair fell back around her shoulders in a tousled disarray that made him want to growl. It looked like she’d already been laid well and he wanted that honor for himself. He snaked an arm around her waist and tugged her against him.
“You’re beautiful.” The words were low and guttural, but that didn’t make them any less true. She was stunning. The puffy lips and dilated eyes only made him want her more. Made him need to hear her scream his name. Her color rose. He could only guess she wasn’t used to compliments. Fuck that. She’d sure as hell get used to them.
Alex started at her waist and slid one hand up her belly to cup her breast. Janie’s breath caught then came just a little quicker.
“You make me want to touch you. Everywhere.”
“O — okay.” It was nothing more than a whispered word, but he took it as permission. With the hand holding her against him, tightly enough she had to feel the hard lump in his jeans press into her stomach, he reached up and undid the clasp on her bra. It fell loose except where she was pressed against his body. He watched her face for any signs of wanting to stop, this might be his last chance. The only release he’d had in more than two years was his own hand and while he was determined to make this good for her, he wasn’t sure about his own control anymore.
“Please,” her whispered plea spurred him.
“What do you need?” He stared down at her.
“I don’t know.” She moved against him, restless, needing but not knowing what she was feeling.
“I got you, sweetheart.” He swept her up and carried her to the bed, then laid her down gently. He peeled her bra away as he stood, then stared down at her a moment, awed by how perfect she looked spread out on his bed. Like she belonged there. He’d be damned if he’d let her go anywhere else.
Ever.
Lowering himself over her, he cupped one full breast with his hand, kneading and squeezing the soft mound of flesh as he pulled the puckered nipple of the other into his mouth and suckled. Her back arched up off the bed and she cried out.
Her breath came in ragged pants and Alex couldn’t help but be pleased at how she reacted. He fumbled for a moment then managed to get the button on her jeans undone. He slipped his hand inside, but kept it on the outside of her underwear. Cupping her through what felt like silk panties. Heat and moisture pooled at the apex of her thighs. Satisfaction shot through him. She was as affected by this as he was. He lifted up, pulling at her nipple with the suction he’d created until the weight became too much and pulled it free. She reached for him, he knew to pull him back, but he moved out of her reach as he shot her a grin.
“Hold on, sweetness, there’s more to come.”
“I know how it works, but this feels so good. I’m not sure the rest will be this good.” Her eyes were glazed with passion and he couldn’t wait to watch her come.
“It’s better. Trust me.”
“I do.”
In that moment he knew she wasn’t lying. He eased her jeans past her hips as she kicked off the shoes she’d been wearing and let him slip the thick denim off. The process revealed the thin white silk panties that were little more than strings and a tiny patch of silk, they barely covered the treasure they hid.
Alex ran his hands up her legs, moving up her body until his face was pressed against that thin barrier. He inhaled, pulling in the intoxicating musky scent of her desire. Unable to resist he took hold of the thin silk with his teeth and tugged it away from her skin. It didn’t want to go.
Impatient to touch her, he grabbed the tiny scrap of fabric and tugged. The thin strings that held it in place snapped. He tossed the useless piece away.
Janie gasped and he looked up to find her watching him with half-lidded eyes. He searched them for any signs of fear and found none.
“You good?”
“I ache.” Her hips moved and he lowered his face over her core again.
“I’ll fix it. Open up for me.” He nudged her thighs apart.
She hesitated for a split second then eased them apart.
“Good girl.” He couldn’t help but encourage her. Alex lowered his body between her legs and lifted her legs into his shoulders as he leaned close once more.
“Are you sure you should do that?” She looked a little uncertain.
“I’m sure. Just give me a minute. You’ll know too in a minute.”
She nodded and he went back to showing her what pleasure was.
Chapter 16
Janie had only ever read about this. She still wasn’t sure why people did it. But she trusted him. Alex wouldn’t hurt her. On the contrary, he�
��d given her nothing but pleasure so far. He lowered his face to that private place between her legs that only she and her doctor had seen before now. Her heart thundered with uncertainty. Would she like it? What if she didn’t? Would he be mad.
A swipe of his tongue nearly made her come up off the bed. Sensations like she’d never felt before raced through her body, clouding her mind and leaving her aching for more.
“Alex.” She didn’t know what else to say. His only answer was another swipe of his tongue. She shuddered as a wave of intense sensations she didn’t have a name for washed through her. She cried out his name again as his mouth covered her and something pressed inside to fill her. Her hands fisted in the blankets beneath her as she needed something to anchor her.
“Alex,” she cried again. “It hurts.”
“Let go.” His voice was calm, soothing. “Let the pleasure come.”
She tried. She trusted him. She closed her eyes and focused on just letting it happen. “I’m scared.”
“I’ve got you.” He shifted, she felt him move, but didn’t open her eyes. She was trying to relax like he’d said. “You’re safe. I’ll make sure of it.”
A deep breath and she let it out slowly and then it came. Her body clenched and seized as pleasure washed through her leaving her gasping and breathless when it was gone.
Janie opened her eyes to find Alex hovering over her, watching her with a grin.
“See, I told you.”
“That was amazing.”
“Hold on, we’re not done. It’s about to get even better, but there’s one part I hate.”
“What?”
“It’s going to hurt at first, at least a little. I wish I could prevent it but there’s nothing I can do.”
She brought one hand up to cup the scarred side of his face, touched by his concern for her. “I know about that. I’m not worried about it.”
He shifted slightly and that hard part of him she’d felt pressing into her belly before was nudging her opening.
“You sure?”
“I’m sure.” She wrapped her arms around his back to keep him close. She loved the feeling of his hard body against her softer one.
“You’re more than I could ever have asked for.” He lowered himself over her and captured her mouth in a kiss so full of need that she almost didn’t notice him moving until she felt the slight burn of her body stretching to accommodate him. Alex stopped and withdrew. Janie broke the kiss to stop him, but before she could say anything he pushed back again, hard. A sharp pain shot through her and took her breath away. Her fingers curled into his back.
“I’m sorry.” He breathed into her hair. The pain started to fade. “It’s done. It won’t hurt anymore. I promise.”
“I know, it’s almost gone now.” She took a couple deep breaths and it was gone. All that was left was the aching need. She whimpered unsure what was wrong.
“I’m sorry.”
“No. That’s gone. It’s different now.” She shifted her hips, the full feeling of him inside her was strange but oddly amazing.
“Different?”
She nodded looking for the right words. “Like before. With your mouth.” Her face heated and a smile spread across his face.
“I know just what you need.” He moved, slowly at first, then faster. Their breath came in short pants and her fingers curled into the skin of his back as wave after wave of pleasure washed through her. Not the one like before but twice, then three times. She cried his name and clung to him with every wave of pleasure. Her body clenched and seized until her toes curled and she had no control of her muscles. Alex thrust deep and called out her name then seemed to collapse, but he didn’t let his weight crush her. Instead he pulled her against him as he fell to the side and held her while their breathing returned to normal.
“Wow,” Janie said once she could think again.
“That about covers it.”
“Is it always like that?” She wouldn’t mind if it wasn’t but if it was. She could easily become addicted.
“It’s been a long time for me. I remember it being good, but that was, wow. That was amazing.” He rubbed his face against her hair while his arms tightened around her.
“I thought it was just not having anything to compare it to.” She liked having his arms around her. They made her feel safe. And something else she hadn’t felt in a long, long time, if ever. Wanted.
“No. It wasn’t just you.” His voice was thick with sleep and satisfaction. Contentment spread through her like melting butter, coating everything. She could get used to this.
Chapter 17
Alex woke in an instant, though out of a habit ingrained of necessity, he didn’t move, not even a twitch. Something was different and until he knew what, it was safer to let anyone who might be watching think he was still asleep. A weight on his chest, warmth against his side. It only took a moment for him to shake off the last of his dream and remember the night before. The way the woman now sleeping on his chest had responded to him and how he’d lost his battle to keep his hands off her.
Opening his eyes, he looked down at her. The lace of her lashes delicate against the pale pink glow of her cheek. He had to shove away the urge to lift her face, wake her with a kiss and have a repeat of the night before. No. She would be sore. Now wasn’t the time. Instead he eased out from underneath her, forcing himself to turn away as she reached for him in her sleep, despite the desire to climb back in and pull her into his arms.
A glance at the clock told him what he suspected. Three A.M. Just like always. There would be no going back to sleep, not for a while at least. Careful to keep from waking Janie, he slipped into the closet, tugged on a pair of sweat pants and headed down to his sanctuary. Now was the perfect time to do that research he didn’t want her to catch him doing.
An hour later Alex sat in front of the wall of screens in what he called his security room seething. It hadn’t taken him long to find Janie online, especially when he had access to some of the most secure databases in the country.
In the time since, he’d read everything he could find on the cult she’d come from, her father’s trial and Janie’s part in it. His heart broke as he read the reports of what she’d been through and witnessed. His admiration for her had grown a hundred times in the last hour. He’d found a couple of photos of her in the file, doing the math she had to have been about fifteen, but she looked maybe twelve, and terrified. Yet she’d stood up to everyone she’d ever known to do what she had known was right. He shook his head and locked the computer. Thinking back over all the odd things she’d done, it made him realized how far she’d come. He knew now why she didn’t seem to mind his scars. She had her own. Hers were just on the inside.
Silently he padded back up to the bedroom. Janie had rolled over. Her nose was crinkled where her face was burrowed against the pillow. He stared down at her a moment, wondering how this beautiful, innocent woman had found the strength to go through everything she’d survived. He shoved his sweats off and slid back between the sheets, pulling her against him. She wouldn’t have to go through it alone anymore. He would be there to protect her. She wiggled her ass as she snuggled into his arms and sighed with contentment in her sleep. His dick started to harden and he had to move away slightly. It was too soon. She’d been through enough, his endless lust for her wasn’t going to be another thing she had to survive. At least not for another few hours.
A faint click woke him. The hairs on the back of his neck stood. Alex remained motionless, at least until he could identify the threat. A faint squeak told him it was the bedroom door. He’d deliberately not had that hinge oiled when it had started making noise. This was why. One more breath and he burst into motion. He reached around, picked up the loaded Detonics 45 off the nightstand and had it pointed at the door in under two seconds. His heart was thundering in his ears when his eyes focused on the figure standing in the doorway.
Dave.
What the hell was he doing home? His brother stood
in the doorway, still in his uniform, hands up.
“Dude, when did you start bringing chicks home?” Other than keeping his hands in sight, Dave ignored the pistol aimed in his direction.
Alex shook his head, put the pistol back on the nightstand and looked at Janie to make sure she was covered. She lay still, her eyes wide as she clutched the sheets under her chin.
“She’s not a chick and you scared her,” Alex growled. He reached over and laid one hand on her, on top of the covers, to assure her everything was okay. “Go away, I’ll be down in a few.”
“I’m gonna drop my bag off in my room then head to the kitchen for some chow. I’m starving.” Dave left, closing the door on his way out.
Alex turned to Janie.
“Sorry, that was my brother. I wasn’t expecting him.” He laid down beside her and pulled her back into his arms. “I had different plans for this morning.” He covered her mouth in a soft kiss filled with longing, then pulled away. If he took too long, Dave would come looking for him again. Alex didn’t want to do that to Janie. “Go back to sleep if you want or come down and meet him. I’d like you to meet him, but there will be time. He’s usually around for a few days when he comes home.”
“All right. I think I’ll take a shower and come down.”
“Whatever you want, sweetness.” He kissed the tip of her nose then covered her mouth in a lingering kiss before forcing himself out of bed. Picking up the sweats he’d dropped a few hours earlier he pulled them on before leaving her to her morning routine.
Alex ran his hand through his hair and shuffled into the kitchen where Dave stood in front of the open fridge while Maggie bustled around fussing over him.
“Bro, by now I’d think you’d know how dangerous it can be to try to sneak into my room,” Alex gave his brother a hug. This wasn’t the first time Dave had tried to sneak in on Alex, nor had it been the first time Alex reacted with a drawn pistol, but it had been the first time Alex wasn’t alone.
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