Chasing Cassidy
Page 5
My poor broken girl. She has no idea how much she’s worth.
“Cassidy, I am who I am right now because of you. Your strength to go through all you have and still be a loving, caring person astounds me. The love you’re willing to give overpowers anything negative in your life. Your dad almost killed you and the first thing you wanted to know was if he was okay. I’m in awe of you, baby, and even more than that, I’m so in love with you.”
She tilts her head back and I turn her slightly so I can capture her mouth with mine. Our kiss is slow and deep but it’s tinged with all of her sadness.
“Cassidy,” I pull away, “I’d give up everything for you without one single look back. There is nothing more important in my world than you. If I could, I would marry you right here, right now.”
She shakes her head no and I let out a soft laugh.
“Oh, yes, Cassidy Pope. You’re going to be my wife one day, but until that day comes, I’m making you the most important promise of our lives.”
Her eyebrow hitches up a little…Good, she’s intrigued.
“I’ve known you since we were six years old and I’ve loved you for as long as I can remember. For the last four years, you’ve been my everything and in those four years, I’ve learned everything there is to know about you.”
“Like what?” she whispers softly as I trace the lines of her body with my fingers.
“Lots of things, but I’ll give you the highlights.” She giggles and I instantly know she’s feeling better. “Let’s see… I know you sigh just as you fall asleep. That when I kiss you here,” I say, kissing the top of her neck right below her ear and she moans, “that you’ll moan because you’re getting turned on. I know when you stay over most nights you’d rather be with me but you stay in Ry’s room because you don’t want her to feel bad. I know you love me more than you ever thought possible but you still feel like I love you more. You’re right. I do love you more, but that’s my job. This is us, baby. This is how we work and it’s perfect. I know you love me with all you have to give. We all love in different ways, Cassidy, and as long as it’s given freely, one person’s love is no better than another’s.”
“Could you be any more romantic?” she asks, releasing another sigh and relaxing even further into me.
“Yes,” I reply with another kiss to the top of her head. “I’m about to be right now. I knew when our hearts merged into one that you would run whenever things got hard, and I made myself a promise to never let that bother me. You’d rather flee than hurt someone but what you don’t realize is when you run, it kills those of us around who would lay down our lives for you. I know it’s just instinct and that’s why I always come after you. I know you’re not trying to hurt me, you’re just trying to cope in the only way you know how.”
“Zack,” she whispers breathlessly.
“Nope, let me finish. Someday you need to work this out with a therapist if you can’t work it out yourself, but until the day comes when you no longer feel the need to run, I will always chase after you. This is my promise to you. No, fuck that, this is my promise to us. Don’t misunderstand me, Cassidy. This isn’t a free pass to run. You need to learn how to accept my love as is and stop being fearful of what or who you think will be affected by us. The only people affected by us are us.”
“Thank you,” she replies softly as I hug her tightly to me.
“For what?” I ask, hoping this time my words sink in.
“For understanding me better than I even understand myself. For loving me more than anyone ever has. For knowing that even when I run, it’s never from you but from my own fears and insecurities. But most of all, for coming after me time and time again. I hope one day I’ll stop being so afraid before you get tired and stop coming after me. I love you, Zack, so very much.”
She turns her head and places a lingering kiss on my lips. It’s tender and sweet, just like her.
“I might get tired of chasing you, but I’ll never stop because I’ll never be tired of you. Making friends with you was the smartest thing I ever did.”
She laughs and turns around, straddling me. “I’m pretty sure Rylee was the one to make friends first. You just happened to be there.”
I’ve never told her this story, but maybe now is as good of a time as any.
“Actually,” I say, lying down as I pull her with me, “I sent Rylee to your door to see if you could come out and play.”
“Seriously? Why didn’t you ever say anything before now?” I love the way her nose crinkles up when she’s curious about something. She’s cute when she’s animated.
“I wasn’t ready to tell you before but now that the past… is really that, I guess it’s okay for me to tell you.”
“Tell me what, Zack? Why do I feel like this is going to be a big deal?”
“Relax, Cassidy, it isn’t bad. Maybe back then it was but, baby, it doesn’t matter now.” Releasing a sigh, I brace myself, suddenly realizing this is not a good idea after all.
“The day before Rylee went to your door, I saw you… actually heard you, first.” Anger floods through me even remembering that day. “Your dad was beating you with the belt in the back of the car and you were screaming. I didn’t realize what was going on back then but I knew it wasn’t good and I wanted to help you. Your dad was so big and scary back then, I thought he might have been a real life ogre.”
A gasp falls from her perfect little mouth. “You saw that? That was the first time he ever did that,” she whispers. “It didn’t start until we moved into the house, but you know that.”
“Yeah, I know. I was pretty far away. Like I said, I heard you but I could see him going in for each strike. It was confusing but I knew it wasn’t right, and when you got out of the car, you were so sad. To me, the worst part of it all was your mom just standing there watching. I’ll never understand why she hasn’t protected you all of these years.” Her mom disgusts me almost more than her dad does.
“She’s just afraid of him,” Cassidy says, making another one of her endless excuses for her.
“Fuck that, Cassidy! She should be protecting you at all costs. You are her child, her responsibility. Your needs and wellbeing should always come above hers.” I know I’m being an ass but I can’t listen to her defend her mother anymore.
Taking a deep breath, I count to five and let it out slowly. I pull her close to me and place a soft kiss on her lips and wipe away her silent tears. “I’m sorry. It just frustrates me to no end knowing the people who brought you into this world have made you suffer so much. No matter how strong you act, I know it hurts you, too.”
“It did, Zack, but you and Nick saved me from ever having to go through that again. They just completely ignore me now and let me do what I want. It might not be the perfect situation, but it’s the best I’ve had since before we moved here. In a few months, when we go away to school, I won’t even have to see them anymore. Everything good happening is because of you. I just…” Her voice trails off and she bites down on her lower lip to keep herself from saying anything else.
“You just what? There’s nothing you can’t say to me. Not now, not ever.”
“I just don’t want you to feel obligated to stay with me.”
That has got to be the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.
Placing my hand behind her head, I gently roll her over and position myself on top of her. I’m going to make this girl feel the depths of my love if it’s the last thing I do in my life. “I love you,” I whisper a breath away from her lips then cover her mouth with mine. I take my time kissing her then pull away slightly.
“I’m going to love you and only you until the day I take my last breath,” I tell her softly before meeting her lips again, claiming them with mine. This time, I kiss her longer but still don’t breach her mouth with my tongue.
Again, I pull away just a bit but whisper into her mouth in hopes that my words will not only weave themselves into her mind but also into her heart. “Love is love. It comes
without strings, without obligation, without judgment, without fear. It is unconditional and all-consuming. I couldn’t separate my love from you if I tried, so please stop trying to push me away because I’m not going anywhere.”
My lips crash onto hers and her mouth immediately opens to mine this time. Her arms wrap around my neck, her fingers immediately finding their home in my hair. She moans erotically as my tongue meets hers in a desperate frenzy. She sucks on my tongue which makes me think of her sucking me somewhere else. I pull back and bite her lip gently as her hands glide down my body until they land on my hips and she tries to pull me closer to her. I’m going to fucking come in my pants if we don’t stop. She knows it, too, because she giggles as I gently ease off of her.
“I’m crazy about you, Cassidy Pope, so stop trying to convince me otherwise,” I tell her firmly with no room for argument.
“I know you are, and I love you so much it physically hurts. I’ve lost the love of the two people in the world who are supposed to love me unconditionally. If I lost your love it would kill me, Zack. It’s easier to push it away than to risk letting it in. I’m sorry. I’m just so messed up but I’m trying. I’d do anything in the world for you even if it meant letting you go.” Her eyes are filled with so much love. I think this might be the most honest she’s ever been with me. Except when she was on morphine and she doesn’t remember much of that.
“You’ll never need to let me go, so don’t worry your pretty little head off about that. Just enjoy what we have, Cassidy, because it’s not going anywhere. It seems quieter out here. I bet the party is winding down. Want to go back inside?” She nods her agreement, so I hop up and reach my hand down to help her up, pulling her to me in the process.
“Marry me,” I ask her again for the umpteenth time since that night.
She giggles. “Maybe someday,” she says softly.
That’s progress.
“I’d love to know how you became so patient and so romantic so young,” she says with a smile.
I place a kiss on her forehead and look into her big blue eyes. “Have you ever watched my parents? I mean, really watched them together?” She shakes her head slightly.
“Watch them next time you’re over. More specifically, watch my dad. My mom is not the easiest person to love, as you well know,” I say cocking an eyebrow at her and she nods. “It doesn’t seem to matter to him. He still keeps trying. He knows she loves him even if she’s abrupt and a bit cold. If we’re in the car, his hand is on hers or resting on her leg. When we watch movies, he always holds her close. If we’re at a party, or just out and about, he holds her hand as often as she’ll let him. It’s just the little things but that man shows his love for her a thousand times a day and she knows it. We all know it. That’s the best kind of romance. It’s not the grand gestures, anyone can do that. It’s the little things that make the difference.”
She stretches up on her tiptoes, places a quick kiss on my lips, and smiles at me.
“You’re going to make a great husband one day, Zack.”
Taking her hand in mine, I lead her back to the house. It’s quiet between us but it’s a comfortable silence. I’m too stunned to even speak. For the first time, Cassidy didn’t tell me I was going to make someone a great husband. She said I would make a great husband. I finally feel as if she’s starting to hear me and really understand I’m not going anywhere.
When the plane lands in Oahu, the flight attendant gently wakes me up and tries to help me with the dress.
“No. Just leave it on the plane, please. Mrs. Stafford can do with it whatever she wishes.” She nods and moves to put it back in the bedroom, but the longing in her eyes tells me she doesn’t understand why I wouldn’t want such a beautiful dress.
Once the plane is opened up, the pilot graciously carries my luggage down to the tarmac where there is a town car with blacked out windows parked and waiting. It’s a little bit humid out but there’s a nice gentle breeze blowing. I can smell the ocean air with a hint of a floral tinge to it. The sun is setting and the sky is a gorgeous shade of orange and pink.
Sadness washes over me and I have to blink back my tears. This should have been my first glimpse of my honeymoon with Zack. It’s my own damn fault I’m in this mess; I don’t have anyone to blame except for myself.
That’s not exactly true. I blame Priscilla, too. If I wouldn’t have let all her negative words and feelings get to me, I’d be Mrs. Zachary Stafford by now.
I’m drawn from my thoughts when the gorgeous man in front of me clears his throat. I don’t usually pay attention to other men but I’d have to be dead not to take a second look at him. Thankfully, he can’t see my appreciative looks. I had put my sunglasses on before exiting the plane so no one could see my big, puffy, red eyes.
“Cassidy Pope I presume? I’m Peter Rafferty. I’m here to take you to the house. I’ll also be your guard for the next few days.”
What’s going on?
“I’m sorry, what do you mean house and why would I need a guard?” I’m not getting in this car until I get some answers from him.
“I’ll explain everything on the way if you’ll just get in the car,” he replies patiently. This man is stoic, I’ll give him that. His blue eyes are locked onto mine but I’m trying to figure out why I feel like I know him. His name sounds so familiar.
“There’s no way in hell I’m going anywhere with you until you explain what’s going on. I don’t make it a habit to get into cars with random strangers.” Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Mr. Stoic.
He chuckles and shakes his head. “Fair enough. Mrs. Stafford has changed your itinerary. You are now staying at a house on Sunset Beach. There will be a total of four guards discretely surrounding the property. She thought it would be best to have you secluded from the paparazzi. She said you don’t like to be in the public eye. Now, if you’ll get in the car, I can answer any more questions you may have on the way.”
Paparazzi. Why didn’t I think about that before? Of course, they’re going to be all over us like vultures. I never think of Zack as someone famous. He’s only famous because he’s wealthy, and the paparazzi didn’t actively start tracking him until he got voted Hottest Billionaire Under Thirty. It was the thing that made me hate his trust fund kicking in—his newfound groupies.
“Peter?”
“You can call me Pete, everyone does,” he says as he closes the door behind me, and I wait for him to walk around and get in the car.
“Okay, Pete, how bad is it?”
“The paps?” he asks, and I nod at him in the rearview mirror.
“I’ve seen worse but I’ll be honest with you, it’s a good thing you’re not at the hotel because even worse than the paps is the influx of women they’ve got staking out the place, hoping Zack will show up looking for you.”
“That doesn’t surprise me. Desperate women will do desperate things. Unfortunately for them, Zack won’t come looking for me, not this time.”
“Do you regret it?” he asks unashamedly, and I’m shocked.
“Excuse me?” I had to have heard him incorrectly.
“Being a runaway bride, do you regret it? I’m sorry if you think I’m prying, it’s just you sounded so dejected when you said he won’t be coming this time. I thought maybe you’d like to talk.” He flashes me a bright smile in the mirror. I can tell he really is just trying to be nice.
“I do, but it’s complicated. I’m a teacher.”
“Why do you say that like it’s a bad thing? What grade do you teach?”
“It’s not a bad thing for me, I love teaching. You just don’t hear about too many billionaires ending up with Kindergarten teachers.” I’m not sure why I feel like I can trust him but I do.
“You know, I had the biggest crush on my Kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Smoke, and she was smoking hot. I would go back and visit her every year until I went to junior high, hoping that was the year she’d fall in love with me,” he says with a hearty laugh.
“Fo
r what it’s worth, if your boyfriend loves you, I don’t think he cares what you do as long as it makes you happy. Has he ever actually told you it bothers him?”
“Well, no, but I know it bothers his family.” God, could I sound any lamer?
“Look, men are simple creatures. We don’t typically lie unless we have good reason. It’s easier for us to tell it like it is. If he had a problem with it, he would have said something, and if he cared what his family thought about it, he would have told you so.”
This guy would be perfect for Ry; they think exactly the same. And I know they’re right. I’m just too hung up on what the influential people around him think and that’s all thanks to Priscilla.
“Do they think you’re after his money?” Oh, now that’s a ballsy question if I’ve ever heard one.
“Not that it is any of your business, but no. They all know me better than that. We’ve been friends since before first grade and we’ve been together… well, we were together for almost twelve years. Money has never been a part of our relationship.”
This jerk is smirking at me! I’m not sure what about our conversation is so amusing to him, but I’ve never been more thankful to arrive somewhere before. Pete rolls down his window, punches in a code, and the massive gates in front of the car slide open. He pulls up into a circular driveway and stops the car in front of an awning.
Pete comes around and opens the door for me and another man steps up and pulls my luggage from the trunk.
“Cassidy, this is Mike. He’ll be guarding the front entrance during your stay.”
“Pleasure, ma’am,” Mike says with a nod of his head as he leads the way inside. We walk up a covered stone pathway leading to the doors. The stone is gorgeous with intricate drawings on each slab. This whole area is breathtaking. It’s completely covered with beautiful, natural wood Adirondack chairs flanking the front doors. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a more beautiful entry. Priscilla must be over-the-moon happy I left to put me up in a place this extravagant.