Shady Shenanigans in Iowa

by Wendy Byrne

  We gathered at a round table right near the front window about eleven thirty. Devouring some delicious and fattening food while we waited was the bonus.

  "Did I tell you Barney volunteered his lake house in Kyleen for 4th of July?" Alice asked. "It's perfect because we can snoop around for information about Jen at the same time."

  "Genius, the way that all worked out, don't you think?" Ramona commented.

  I was hoping for something a little more intimate between Gabe and me, but this could work in our favor. "With everything going on, I'd forgotten about investigating Jen's hometown. You're right. This will be a perfect opportunity to snoop around."

  It seemed odd that Barney so easily volunteered his cabin on the 4th of July. But he and Alice had been hot and heavy since their chance encounter at Purdy's. Alice tended to attract unusual characters, so I wasn't all that surprised.

  "A nice little getaway plus a chance for us to do a little snooping. A perfect combination," Viola said.

  I felt a lot more positive than ten minutes earlier. For the first time since this mess started, I had a feeling we might be on to something big.

  We kept stuffing ourselves with unhealthy diner food while we chatted. Before I knew it, it was twelve forty-five. Customers were starting to leave as the lunch crowd headed back to work or elsewhere.

  While I tried to keep my focus across the street, it was difficult to not get distracted by the people staying at the diner. Most were in their sixties to eighties I guessed, with a sprinkling of younger people. Compared to Inez, Anton seemed thriving with a rush of activity.

  A lady who looked to be close to the Qs' ages waved to the waitress. "Hey, Tootsie, I'm going to be late for my one o'clock massage." Her frog-like voice was indicative of a lifetime smoker. As soon as she stepped outside, she lit up as she made her way across the street. She stood outside Gail's taking a few last drags before crushing it out with her foot. I glanced at my watch. One o'clock on the dot. I could only hope Moochie was on time as well.

  "Are you sure somebody shouldn't wait inside?" Ramona suggested as we all focused on the sidewalk outside Gail's.

  "We might miss something from this distance," Dolly offered.

  "We need to stay put and keep our cover. Moochie will never know we're on to him. And that's the perfect way to catch him."

  Alice squealed and pointed. A man pulled down the brim on his baseball cap and rushed down the sidewalk. "Looks mighty suspicious if you ask me."

  I had to agree with Alice's observation. All five of us held binoculars to our eyes, ignoring the odd looks we received from the other patrons.

  "He doesn't look familiar," Ramona said.

  "That's probably a good thing, don't you think?" Viola added.

  My heart beat wildly as I snapped off some pictures on my phone right before he opened the door. "He looks to be in a hurry. I wonder why."

  Less than five minutes later, he exited the salon stuffing a small card into his front pocket. We sat in stunned silence. "The first male we've seen go in there, and it's a bust," Dolly said. "That was either the fastest massage on record or he forgot to buy his wife a birthday present and snuck in there for a gift card."

  "Patience." While I tried to keep my optimism high as a steady stream of female customers from teens to seniors entered the place, it was difficult, especially since it was now a quarter past one.

  "Wait a minute. Here comes a guy looking like he's on a mission." Alice pointed with her finger on the window glass, the binoculars pressed against her skin. "OMG, that's—"

  She couldn't finish her words, and neither could anyone else. I felt a giddy sensation warm my body when he went through the door. Validation for a job well done followed. I'd know that eyebrow scar anywhere. "I do believe the Madman has arrived a little late for his massage."

  Now that was a perfect ending to a day of hard investigative work.

  "For the first time ever, I'm stunned," Viola said, confirming what we'd all been thinking. "That guy has some nerve going after Nate like he has, considering what he's been up to."

  "Somebody should kick that guy's butt from here to California for what he did to Nate," Alice said.

  "But why frame Nate? Would he stoop that low because Nate got the job in Inez instead of his nephew?" The question circled my brain, and it didn't add up, even if the proof was right there before us. Charlie Evans, aka Madman, had to be Moochie.

  "I guess there's the possibility that the Madman isn't connected," Dolly said. "And we somehow missed Moochie or he went in a back entrance."

  "Or maybe Madman's connected to the drug dealer that Jen ripped off back in New York. For all we know, this thing could be more pervasive than we even imagined." I chewed on the few facts we knew and tried to put together the pieces of the puzzle, but nothing fit. That had to mean there were more threads we had yet to unravel.

  "What do we do with the information?" Viola asked. "It doesn't really prove he's the master drug dealer. We'll need hardcore evidence to make anything stick."

  "Maybe we should leave and look for a back exit to the building. That way we'd know if Moochie could have slipped in through the back."

  Part of me didn't want to think about the possibility. I wanted this to be pinned on the least likely subject and tell Nate all about it. But we also needed to do our due diligence and be sure there wasn't another explanation.

  We left the diner feeling elated by our discovery and felt even better when we checked the door in back, only to find it locked from the inside.

  Validation felt sooooo good. Now to talk to Nate.

  * * *

  Emily greeted me with a smile and a bounce as she opened the door before I rang the doorbell. I wasn't sure if Nate had told her I was coming or if she'd seen my car pull up.

  She threw herself at me and hugged my knees before I bent down to embrace her. Her normally bubbly personality cranked to overload.

  "I'm so glad you came to visit my daddy." She put her lips by my ear. "He's been kind of sad lately. I'm sure seeing you will cheer him up."

  "Hi, Izzy." As usual, he looked about as comfortable as I felt even while his daughter glanced between the two of us as if expecting us to announce our engagement any minute now.

  "Em, honey, can you go upstairs while Ms. Izzy and I have some grown-up talk?"

  She squealed and clapped her hands before rushing up the stairs.

  Nate and I exchanged looks, and he flinched. "Sorry about that."

  I held out my hand. "No problem," I said. "I want to fill you on some weird news that maybe you can help interpret for us." I took a deep breath. "Phil turned us on to Spike, who named this guy named Moochie as a possible lead. We scouted out the place where he has a masseuse appointment every Thursday at one. We didn't have a description since Spike had never seen him."

  "And?"

  "We saw one guy go in around one o'clock. Charlie Evans." My hands shook as I delivered the bomb.

  Nate shook his head. "No way. As much as I hate Charlie, I can't see him being involved. He's as straight as an arrow, even if the guy is a jerk."

  "Jerks are drug dealers too."

  "It could be that Moochie cancelled and it was just coincidence that he was there at that time."

  "Besides the guy who came and went within a few moments, he was the only male who came in there any time around one."

  "Did you check for a back door?"

  I nodded. "It was locked tight. The only thing I don't understand yet is how it's connected to you."

  "Here's the thing. Nobody knows this. I had started to do a bit of snooping around when I heard rumors of a new drug dealer operating in the county. I hadn't gotten too far when all this started happening."

  "But that fits in perfectly with what I just told you." While my words were spoken in confidence, my inner critic couldn't help but wonder if I was missing something.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  After the week I'd had, escaping to the country—well, more country than I
nez—seemed like a welcome relief. Taking off for a little recognizance on Jen's past while we were there would be a win/win.

  Barney said a mini state fair was held in the town center right across the lake from his home. The event included both a pie and hot dog eating contest. These folks sure knew how to gross me out. But I knew the Qs would be rabid to see both events.

  "Are you sure there's a house here somewhere?" Gabe turned down a long narrow road that I hoped led to a cabin at some point.

  "I'm beginning to wonder if Barney is a storyteller. What guy offers a cabin over the 4th of July weekend when he's not going to be here?"

  "Maybe he was wowed by Alice's charming personality?" Gabe laughed.

  "She barely knows him, which might explain a lot now that I think about it." I chuckled.

  "They're old. They probably don't want to waste time."

  I put my hands over my ears. "Please do not elaborate. My imagination is bad enough."

  "You have a dirty mind. That is not— Wait. I think I see something up ahead."

  "That's it?" I stared at the oversize cabin-like structure that could have used a facelift, judging by outward appearance. "How are we all going to fit in there?"

  Gabe stopped the truck, and we both got out. I wasn't sure what Gabe was thinking, but I was tempted to Google local hotels just in case. Viola pulled her van alongside Gabe's truck, and the Qs piled out.

  No one said a word for the longest time as we collectively stared in awe. I didn't dare breathe. While I wasn't a germaphobe, I had trouble thinking about what might be hiding inside that home based on the hot-mess exterior.

  "Don't judge a book by the cover," Alice said as she stomped up the pathway pulling her rolling suitcase behind her. "I've been here before, and the inside is much nicer than the outside. Barney's having the cedar replaced in the fall."

  My question was, would the exterior withstand a medium-sized wind? I gave it a fifty-fifty shot.

  I helped Gabe get the remainder of the stuff out of the back of the van and trailed up the stairs. "Do you know if there's a decent hotel nearby where we can stay if the inside halfway resembles the outside?" I whispered.

  He laughed, but I could tell he was worried about the same thing. "At that rate, we'd probably be better off heading back home, although I know the Qs would only leave under duress. You know those ladies hate to be wrong, and giving up on their idea for a 4th of July cabin getaway wouldn't happen."

  "We'd have to trick them. But I haven't been able to accomplish that feat yet. I swear those women are psychic the way they know my plans to get around them in advance."

  "Try growing up when you have four grandmothers watching your every move. I never got away with anything."

  "Isn't that the beauty of a small town? There's always somebody watching out for you or tattling on you, depending on the perspective." I hoisted the last of the supplies into my arms.

  Five wooden steps badly in need of repair led to a ginormous front porch also in need of a good coat of paint. It squeaked as we walked on it but had a nice porch swing that could be salvageable if it was hosed down before sitting on it. My thoughts relative to surviving a couple of days here became bleaker and bleaker as we walked through the front door.

  But that's when everything flipped. Inside, the place sparkled with beautiful wooden floors, tall ceilings, and a clear view to the backyard and lake. Floor-to-ceiling bookshelves surrounded a reading nook built into the window alcove on the left, which overlooked a garden. An immense kitchen sat in the center, with gleaming white cabinets and open shelving, along with a giant breakfast bar. A family room with French doors covered the back and led to a deck. Three worn but comfy-looking couches and two overstuffed chairs surrounded a large stone fireplace.

  Alice had that cat-that-just-ate-the-canary look on her face while the ladies oohed and ahhhed. She pranced about the kitchen like Cinderella after her pumpkin had just turned into a carriage to take her to the ball. "Izzy, isn't this place fabulous?"

  "It was nice of Barney. What did you say he did?"

  "Something to do with the stock market, I think. Apparently, the man knows what he's doing, because these digs are pretty cool."

  "They're fabulous." I thought through how to ask the next question as tactfully as possible. "Did he say why he couldn't join us?"

  "He was already going away this weekend with his family. I think he mentioned the Caribbean, or maybe it was the Mediterranean."

  Yeah, nothing said 4th of July like a trip out of the country. Oh well…not my problem. Instead of voicing my skepticism, I smiled and nodded. Alice was smitten, as the Qs would say, and there wasn't anyone who could change her mind. And I wouldn't dare try.

  "There are four bedrooms with two baths on the second floor and another master bedroom with a private en suite on the third. That's where you and Gabe can stay. You'll have the whole floor to yourselves."

  Gabe and I looked at each other and shook our heads. "I can't believe this," I whispered as we trudged our things upstairs.

  "Neither can I. What do you know about this Barney guy?" Gabe asked.

  "Other than Alice met him at Purdy's, not much."

  "So, he's into moonshine."

  "I think he's into meeting women, which is why he hangs out there. He and Alice are a weird couple."

  Gabe held out his hand. "First off, just the concept of Alice being half of a couple is weird. Her husband ran away about thirty years ago. Personally, I think she drove him crazy."

  "Totally possible. Alice can be a handful." I stopped and set my suitcase down next to the antique bed and admired it for a few minutes before I continued. "What do you mean he ran away? Like he disappeared and never returned?"

  "Something like that. It was a long time ago, and I was a kid at the time."

  I swallowed. "Do you think he's dead?"

  He shook his head. "Lives in Wainsville. They must have gotten divorced, because I heard he remarried."

  I shrugged away all the questions that flitted through my head. "He's got to be in his eighties too, I imagine."

  "Why all these questions suddenly?"

  "I don't know. I guess I can't picture Alice being married."

  "Maybe that was the problem to begin with. Neither could she." He kissed my hair. "But regardless of what either of us think about Barney, you've got to admit this place is pretty cool." He walked over to the bathroom that had an oversize claw-footed tub plus a state-of-the-art-steam shower. "This could be fun." He motioned toward the steam shower while I eyed the claw-footed tub.

  "I have to wonder why a man would randomly let us use this house for the weekend with no strings attached."

  "Why are you always looking for a mystery when there is none? Besides, how do you know there aren't strings attached?"

  "Eww. Just eww. I'm going to need to scrub my eyeballs after that visual."

  * * *

  By the next day, I was more than ready for a little alone time after spending the evening playing bocce ball with the Qs. Let's just say there were several near misses and leave it at that.

  I tiptoed down the back steps while the gang was preoccupied with picnic planning and maneuvered myself into the kayak. With Gabe at the store getting more charcoal for the barbecue and some wood to repair the front steps for Barney, I figured I'd indulge in a trip around the lake.

  When I'd told Gabe my plan for the morning, he laughed so hard he had tears in his eyes. Ouch, that had hurt. Not that I'd blamed him. I did have a tendency to be klutzy. But it would be nice to paddle around the lake and get the lay of the land before tomorrow's 4th of July celebration.

  Step one was a success, as I managed to get myself into the kayak without ending up in the lake. Victory fist bump with myself followed. The wind had picked up since yesterday and the water had turned choppy, but I was determined to get some exercise and much needed alone time.

  It didn't take long to develop a rhythm as the boat glided along the top of the water. Houses sproute
d up along the shoreline interspersed by trees in a random pattern. I spotted a few kids playing on a swing set, while a couple others chased each other around a sprinkler.

  I gave in to the serenity of the moment as the paddle stroked through the water evenly side to side, and I felt myself getting absorbed into the Zen moment. Despite my reticence, it felt good to be out here. A kind of peace settled inside, and I thought about kayaking around the entire lake. Luckily, sanity took control—thank goodness—since I wasn't exactly in fighting shape, and I would probably have had to send off a distress signal if I attempted to go that far.

  A delicious ache sprouted in my shoulders and arms. The sun warmed my back through my light T-shirt as sweat rolled down my neck. And it felt good.

  My unencumbered mind began to contemplate Nate's predicament and what my next move might be. Although I would love the vindication of seeing Charlie Evans hung out to dry, I had a feeling that a giant piece of that puzzle remained missing.

  Where did my twin fit into all of this? Now that she'd left that note, coincidence was no longer a consideration. Her presence was intentional. But she was chaotic in her process—at times showing up at places where people I knew frequented and at other times intending to discredit me. Could Jen really be alive, or was I naïve in believing a scribbled message on a Post-it Note?

  Being in her hometown couldn't hurt our search. For all I knew, if she really were alive, she might be hiding out someplace locally.

  What had Cleo said in her ramblings? Something about there's no chance of winning unless you start at the beginning. If you plant the seed, you'll find who did the deed. And she also mentioned an avenging spirit. That had really thrown me off. Then again, I'm always too freaked out to make any sense of whatever Cleo said. Maybe now was the time to dissect her Seuss-like riddles and try to solve them.

  Firecrackers exploded off to the left, followed by more to the right—telltale signs that folks were antsy for the celebration to begin. Distracted, it pulled me out of my rhythm, and I dug too deep on my right side and began to go in circles. After another overcorrection, I finally got it right.