I just wanted to speak to her. I needed a friend. She had picked up immediately, overjoyed to hear from me. But she had known straight away that there was something wrong. I had tried to hedge around the issue, but she knew .
“Come home,” she told me. “You sound really upset. Maybe being away from him will clear your mind, and you can decide what you want to do. You can stay with me, Amber, until you decide. You know you are always welcome .”
I had been non-committal, and ended the call. But then, I had got online, searching flights. As luck would have it, there was one for San Francisco that night. I didn’t think. I booked it. I then had to arrange to get Lilah to her grandparents, and pack quickly. It had been such a whirlwind .
I had cried when I had written the note for Finn .
But I was also determined. He wanted a fake fiancée, to keep Lilah. He also wanted to have sex with me, when it suited him. But I was in love with him, and it simply hurt too much. I knew he was a mess after Erin’s death, and wasn’t sure if he was ready .
But I couldn’t wait around for him to get his shit together. He might never. And in the meantime, I would be eating my heart out for him, and getting sadder because he could never commit to me .
He had been right. Getting close had made things way too complicated .
I should have known better .
* * *
N ot long, now. I had already checked in. I just had to walk through the Customs gates, and I would be on my way. Why wasn’t I doing it? Why was I sitting here, staring at the ground, boarding pass in hand ?
Then I looked up. Oh my God .
It was Finn, staring at me. He had a wild look in his eyes, and he was breathing heavily, as if he had been running. He slowly walked up to me .
“Amber,” he whispered. I stood up, as if in a dream .
“Why are you here?” I whispered back .
“Don’t leave me.” He looked at me, tears in his eyes. “I couldn’t bear it. I’ve been so stupid. I’ve only just realised that I’m in love with you .”
“You love me?” I breathed .
He nodded, slowly. “I’m an idiot. I should have known, before now. I think I’ve been fighting it. It was just so hard, to open my heart up again. After what happened with Erin .”
He pulled me into his arms, caressing me. “I just know that I couldn’t bear to lose you. The thought of you getting on that plane, and flying out of my life, drove me crazy .”
He tilted my face up to him, staring into my eyes. “I love you, body and soul, Amber .”
“I love you, too,” I whispered. “It had just become too painful, once I realised. I couldn’t stay here, pretending to be your fiancée and fighting my feelings .”
“You love me?” He looked at me, then grabbed me, twirling me around. “You love me !”
He set me back down on the ground. He took my face in his hands, and kissed me, long and hard. I responded, ardently. We forgot where we were, for a moment. The sound of clapping brought us back to reality. We looked around, dazed. People were staring at us, smiling and grinning .
“How romantic,” said a woman, to her companion. We smiled back, a bit sheepishly .
“Let’s get out of here,” he said. “I don’t know about you, but the next thing I want to do with you shouldn’t be done in a crowded airport .”
I took his hand, not fully believing what was happening .
“Let’s go home,” he said .
* * *
W e turned the central heating on as soon as we got inside, and he poured us both a drink. He wouldn’t stop touching me, as if he couldn’t believe that I was actually here .
“It’s fate,” he said. “If I had have been half an hour later, I would have missed you. You would have boarded that plane and be flying out of my life.” He shook his head. “Oh, Amber. I couldn’t have borne it .”
“I think it is fate,” I said. “I had my boarding pass. There was no reason why I hadn’t walked through Customs. It was like I was waiting for you, without even knowing it .”
He leaned over me on the sofa, kissing me passionately. It was like we needed to do it, to seal our connection. We had almost lost each other. It had been so close .
We made love like we were drowning, and the other was the only thing saving us from going under. I never knew such passion could exist. When he was inside me, it was like coming home .
A home I never wanted to leave .
Afterwards, as we lay in each other’s arms, he sighed .
“Amber, I need to say this.” He stroked my face. “I know what I want, now. It has never been clearer to me. But I don’t want to stop you from living your dreams. If you want to return to the States, and finish your studies, you should do it. I will provide you with the money you need .”
I looked at him. “You would do that for me ?”
He nodded. “I would. We could relocate to the States, the three of us, while you do it .”
My eyes shone with tears. “Finn, you have given me a gift. But let’s not decide, for now. There are law schools in Australia. That’s always an option .”
He smiled, tenderly. “Either way, Amber my love, I want you to be my wife. For real, this time .”
“Is that a proposal?” I smiled at him .
“It is.” He got down on one knee, looking up at me. “Amber, will you be my wife ?”
“I will be your wife,” I answered, slowly. “Nothing would make me happier in this world .”
He kissed me. “I think we should go shopping, tomorrow. For an engagement ring. A real one .”
I smiled, looking down at my hand. “Oh, Finn, you don’t have to do that. I already have one .”
“You do,” he agreed. “But that was given out of convenience. I didn’t even pick it. This time, I want us to go together, and we can choose a ring which we both love .”
“Okay,” I said, smiling .
I couldn’t believe it. My fake fiancée was now my real one. I couldn’t wait for our life to begin. With Finn, my one and only love, by my side. Forever .
* * *
THE END
Epilogue
C ara
I was shocked as I cleared Customs, walking into Arrivals at Melbourne Airport. There was a throng of people pressed against the gate, jostling signs and shouting. It really unnerved me .
I shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts. It had been a long, long flight. Amber had told me, of course. But the information obviously hadn’t entered my brain. I had just crossed two time zones and I felt as if I was a zombie, like I had never slept and would never sleep again. I had never experienced jet lag this bad before .
I scanned the faces in the crowd, confused. Then, I suddenly saw her .
Amber. My closest friend, smiling brightly, jumping up and down. I steered my luggage trolley through the throng towards her .
“Cara! You’re here!” Amber threw her arms around me, almost knocking me to the ground. “What was the delay? I’ve been waiting over an hour !”
“Beats me,” I shrugged, returning the hug. “We didn’t take off on time from Singapore. That might be it.” I looked my best friend in the face. “That was brutal, Amber. The longest flight of my life .”
Amber laughed. “I did try to tell you.” She paused, carefully looking at me. “You look beat. Do you want to have a coffee before we go, or do you want to get straight home? I imagine you just want to hit the sack .”
“Coffee,” I declared. “I want to chat with you, alone, before I meet your beloved. It’s been so long .”
We found a café in the airport, sipping our lattes as we watched the world go by .
“So.” I stretched, feeling the caffeine hit my bloodstream, revitalising me. “Tell me everything! When is the wedding ?”
Amber gave me all the details, her face betraying her happiness. “I’m so glad you came. I wouldn’t want anyone else to be my bridesmaid. And you will love Finn, and Lilah, of course. I can’t wait for you to
meet them .”
“Neither can I,” I said. “Wow! I can’t believe that you are about to get married. And to an Australian! What am I going to do, with my bestie living on the other side of the world ?”
Amber frowned. “I don’t want to think about it. I will miss you so much. But you’re here now, that’s all that matters .”
Amber’s cell phone suddenly started vibrating on the table in front of us. She picked it up, mouthing to me that it was Finn. I zoned out while Amber took the call. It wasn’t just the long flight. My mind was in a whirlwind, thinking over all the problems I had left behind in San Francisco .
My medical studies, which I didn’t think I could continue. I had hit a wall, unable to work the long hours of an intern and still work my part time waitressing job. I had felt I was on the verge of a collapse .
Then Amber had called, begging me to come to Australia to be her bridesmaid. I had jumped at the opportunity. A break was definitely what I needed. I had to think long and hard about where my life was going .
Amber ended the call, looking at me in surprise. “That was Finn,” she said. “He was calling about his best friend, Bryce. You know, the one I was telling you about? Turns out Bryce has landed himself in some hot water. One of his old girlfriends has suddenly died .”
“Why has that landed him in hot water?” I asked. “Did he kill her ?”
Amber laughed. “No, of course not! Bryce is a pussy cat. He might think he’s the playboy of the Western world, but inside, he is a softie. No, it turns out the ex has a child. And the child is Bryce’s! He had no idea. He is absolutely shocked .”
“What’s he going to do?” I sipped my latte .
“He doesn’t really know.” Amber frowned. “But Finn thinks he will take his son in. What else can he do? But it’s a bit of a dilemma. He works from dawn to dusk, plus he’s just taken a secondment to work on the Gold Coast, in Queensland. He’s going to need some help .”
“I’m sure he’ll work it out,” I said .
Amber sat up straighter, looking at me intensely. “You should do it, Cara! Become his nanny .”
“What?” I looked at Amber as if she had just lost her mind. “What are you talking about? I live in the States! I’m just here visiting for your wedding .”
Amber looked excited. “No, but it’s perfect! You said you’re exhausted, not knowing where you’re going with your medical studies. This way, you would have time to think, while earning money. And we would be in the same country !”
I shook my head. “Amber, I don’t think so. I don’t know the first thing about nannying, for a start. And you’re jumping the gun a bit, aren’t you? You don’t even know what this Bryce character is intending to do with this long-lost child. And he mightn’t approve of me as a nanny, anyway .”
Amber smiled. “I can talk him around, and so can Finn. Cara, just think about it, will you ?”
I finished my latte, looking at Amber. “I’ll think about it. But not now. Can we please go to your beautiful mansion, so I can get some sleep ?”
Amber laughed. “Of course. Let’s go, sleepyhead .”
On the car trip through Melbourne, I went over what Amber had said. It seemed unlikely, anyway. I might not even get along with this Bryce. But if I did, it could be a good opportunity to clear my mind. See what I really wanted to do with my life .
Things weren’t going well in California. I couldn’t remember the last time that I had slept properly. It was becoming a real issue .
I toyed with the idea, a little. Then I abruptly fell asleep, pressed up against the glass of the passenger side window .
* * *
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Convicted
Jason
C link!
I glanced behind me at the finality of the sound as the security gate of Kenworth maximum security prison slid into place. After eight long years, with two years suspended service, I was finally on the other side. A little older, a little wiser, and a hell of a lot more jaded. If the judge had worried about the threat I had posed to society all those years ago, he had no idea what I was capable of now .
I was only twenty-two years old, a man or rather a boy, with future plans when I was tried and found guilty for my crime. My age hadn’t given me any reprieve. In fact, it had made me a walking target. It didn’t matter that I was in for involuntary manslaughter. My fellow inmates took one look at the baby face and scrawny frame and only saw fresh meat .
That first night had been hell. I barely made it out with my life. A bruised liver, four cracked ribs, a myriad of cuts, and a broken jaw had put me in the infirmary for six weeks .
Battered and bruised, with my jaw wired shut, I lay there wishing someone would come finish the job. But to my dismay, no one came. The ribs healed, and the bruises faded; physically I recovered, but my soul was forever tainted and bruised .
The pretentious state doctor even had the gall to say, I wouldn’t have any lasting effects from the incident. But apparently, the four-inch scar that ran diagonally down over my right eye and down to the corner of my mouth, made me look less like a pampered princess and more like a hard-core criminal to be feared by my inmates. I had damn near lost my eyesight. If I hadn’t tripped over a crate and fallen backward, the blade would have sliced through more than just my brow and cheek. It would have taken my eye with it. It was that defining moment, as the bandages came off and the doctor smirked at me, as if I was a no-good piece of trash, that I realized I was truly on my own .
The assault continued, throughout most of my sentence, and although the incidents that followed weren’t even close to the extent of the first one, I feared for my life day in and day out. Closer to my release, Warden Saunders took pity on me and offered me six months of solitary confinement. I eagerly accepted .
I didn’t spend those six months in solitary confinement feeling sorry for myself, hell no! Instead, I focused on getting stronger, meaner and craftier. When I was locked in my cell, I spent every waking hour working out, using my own body-weight as resistance. I was only allowed outside for one hour a day, but I made the most of it, using the gym equipment, come rain or sunshine, mentally and physically preparing myself for the day I walked out of this god forsaken place .
At first, I could hardly do one rep without my arms quaking with the attempted effort, but it was the steely resolve within that enabled me to ignore the snickers and taunts from the guards, that kept me going. When my muscles screamed with fatigue and tears burned the back of my eyes, I forced myself to do ten more reps .
I ate every scrap of food I could get my hands on. It wasn’t difficult to put on weight in prison, the food mostly carbs and saturated fat. But, turning it into muscle took time and discipline. I had both .
When I wasn’t lifting weights, or doing endless squats, I was shadowboxing in my tiny four-foot by the six-foot cell, working on my technique and speed .
In solitary confinement, I could read as many books as I wanted. Although they limited my book choices, no martial arts or boxing how-to books, I found ways to get around it by reading biographies on Evander Holyfield, Royce Gracie, and Muhammad Ali. I was even able to get my hands-on books about Pilates and tai-chi and adapted their moves to create my own unique fighting style. I was determined to be ready when I was moved back into general population. I was relentless in my pursuit of strength, speed, and power, and for a good reason .
My skills were tested the first night back in my normal cell, and a few times after that. But this time I held my own. I had managed to put on twenty pounds of solid muscle but more importantly, I had improved my speed and my agility. I quickly made a name for myself as being dangerous and ruthless. That reputation had served me well .
Dwelling on the past wasn’t something I liked to do; it was the one closet full of skeletons I would rather keep
locked up. I took one last look at the place that had been my own personal living hell. There was nothing else left for me there. Determined to close the door on Kenworth just like it had closed the doors on me, I turned my back and headed down the road toward the rundown bus shelter that sat across the street a few yards away from the prison. The vestibule had seen better days and reeked of stale cigarettes and urine. Not much different to prison. I chose to lean against the frame, figuring it was the least contaminated spot as I waited .
There was no bus schedule posted on the shelter, and I had no watch to tell me what time it was, but the bus ticket in my front left pocket read 8 pm. Besides the clothes on my back, a piece of paper with the name and phone number of my parole officer and an old wrinkled photograph were the only things I was taking with me upon my release .
The sun was beginning to set, and it would be dark soon. As if on cue, the lone streetlight flickered to life, emitting a dim glow. They had begun processing my release at 5 pm, and that had taken all of fifteen minutes. Assuming it had taken another fifteen minutes to walk through all the security checkpoints and the gate, I was in for a long wait. It wasn’t like I wasn’t good at that. These past eight years, I’d had a lot of time on my hands and patience became my best friend. For many months, hell even the first couple of years, anger and hate fueled my determination. It lit a fire in my belly and kept me focused. I would lie in bed plotting my revenge on the people that had doubted my word, the court system that had failed me, and the people who had failed to protect my baby sister from that child predator .
Gladys Winston’s pinched face came to my mind, a withering old crone. The rage that I thought had long been suppressed threatened to boil to the surface at the thought of that old hag. I refused to think of her as family, despite her son Wallace Jr., having married our mother a few years after our father had died. I blamed her for ending up in prison in the first place. She just couldn’t believe that her one and only son could be such a monster. She had blatantly lied under oath to protect the sick bastard, claiming that I had violent tendencies even as a child. Fake tears had trickled down her cracked cheeks as she claimed to have desperately tried to persuade her precious son Wallace to send me to a home for wayward boys. To get me the help, I so desperately needed. But his kind heart wouldn’t allow him to give up on me. The lies just flowed freely from her thin, dry lips after that. She went on to claim that I had not had the best male role model growing up, implying that my biological father had been an alcoholic and that’s why he had died. The jury had eaten it up like sweetcakes at a fair .
His Christmas Baby: A Friends to Lovers Romance Page 46
