The Gift of Love (Finding Love Book 9)

by Delaney Cameron

  “This is the first time you’ve smiled since we left Patriot’s Point. What’s wrong, Leah?”

  Was there anything he didn’t notice? “Does there have to be something wrong?”

  “No, but I’m so used to seeing you smile that I get worried when you don’t. If you’re upset or unhappy, I want to know about it.”

  “Why? What does it matter?”

  “Do I have to explain this to you of all people? There shouldn’t be anything friends can’t share with each other.”

  Leah glanced away from him. “You’re not going to like what I have to say. It might even make you angry.”

  “That’s never stopped you before,” he pointed out.

  She laughed nervously. “That’s true.”

  “Then let’s hear it. It’s always better to have things out in the open.”

  Leah leaned against the newel post at the bottom of the stairs. “Why didn’t you let Denver get those other two things he wanted at the gift shop? Especially when you know he doesn’t have long…” The last few words stuck in her throat. For the life of her, she couldn’t make herself say them. All she could do was stare at him helplessly as her eyes filled with tears.

  Stratton didn’t say anything at first. Instead, he gently wiped away the tears with the pad of his thumb. “There’s nothing I’d like more than to grant Denver’s every wish. You’re proof of the lengths I’m willing to go to ensure his happiness. But as much as possible, I want to treat him like a normal child instead of labeling him as a cancer victim who has to be handled differently. Children are far more intuitive than we give them credit for. They’re quick to sense and attach meaning to changes around them. Denver would find it odd if I suddenly started allowing him to have everything he wants or didn’t correct him when he does something wrong. Those aren’t the behaviors he’s come to expect from me. There’s security in the familiar. Besides being loved, children need to feel secure.”

  It wasn’t only children; adults needed to feel secure, too. “I’m sorry for doubting you and even more for presuming to question you about your own son. I know you have Denver’s best interests at heart.”

  “I gave you the right to question me four weeks ago today when you became Denver’s mother. Parenting takes teamwork. If you think I’m doing something wrong, don’t hesitate to ask me about it. My single-mindedness has caused me to make some bad decisions in the past.”

  His humility disarmed her, proving once again that she was only beginning to really understand the man she married. “You’re a great father, Stratton, and an even better man. Please don’t ever think otherwise.”

  * * * * *

  Hearing these sentiments from someone outside his family, someone with no ax to grind and who viewed the situation more objectively, made them hard to ignore. As Stratton stared into Leah’s lovely features, the current he’d sensed between them on numerous occasions ignited more powerfully than ever. This time he didn’t even try to resist it. Instead he leaned down until his lips just touched hers. The closing of her eyes was all the incentive he needed.

  The velvety softness of her mouth robbed him of the last of his common sense, breath and thought. For the first time in nearly ten months, he felt something other than fear and misery. The heaviness of mind, body and spirit that comes with maintaining a brave face in a hopeless situation was replaced by a sensation of weightlessness. Instead of seeing himself being dragged deeper into a dark abyss, he felt as if he was floating toward a bright light.

  He didn’t want the intense pleasure and sense of peace taking hold of him to end. His hands crept around Leah’s waist and slowly inched their way up her back. In response, she shifted her body until there wasn’t a hair’s breadth of space between them, her hands sliding up his arms to rest lightly on his shoulders. At this point, the only thing keeping Stratton on the ground was gravity.

  The sudden slamming of a door jerked them apart like two people shaken awake from a deep sleep. One glance at Leah was enough to know he wasn’t the only one feeling disoriented. He tried to think of something to say, but his mind and body were engaged in a heated argument; the former assessing blame and the latter pleading for a repeat performance.

  “Mommy! Daddy! Where are you?”

  Denver’s high-pitched voice cleared the last of the fog from Stratton’s brain. “Be right there, bud,” he called out. Beside him, Leah bent down to pick up something on the carpet. It wasn’t until he saw her redoing her ponytail that he realized what it was. There was only one way her hair band could have fallen to the floor, and the fact that he couldn’t remember doing it didn’t make him feel any better. Being swept away by his emotions didn’t happen very often.

  As he followed her up the stairs, he debated whether he should apologize (which might make things worse) or just act as if nothing had happened (which would save them both further embarrassment. One thing was certain: he couldn’t let this happen again. A marriage between friends didn’t include mind-bending, pulse-racing kisses, and if it did, it probably wouldn’t remain a marriage of convenience for long.

  * * * * *

  To say Leah was blown away by Stratton’s kiss would have been an understatement as well as an oversimplification. She’d been kissed many times; some of them more enjoyable than others. But none had made her feel as if she’d entered another dimension of time and space, one that made everything before it irrelevant and forgettable. This first kiss, the one she’d hoped and dreamed about, had surpassed her every expectation.

  Denver’s interruption had prevented her having any clues to how Stratton felt about it. The incurable romantic inside her wanted to take this as a sign that he was starting to think about her as something more than a friend. The realistic Nurse Langston wasn’t so easily convinced. This wasn’t a fairytale. A single kiss, no matter how perfect or toe-curling, could mean anything or nothing at all.

  Once they returned home, the routine of eating dinner, giving some attention to Aristotle and Long John Silver, and getting Denver ready for bed forced them back into their allotted roles. When the clock struck nine, Stratton closed the book he’d been reading aloud and laid it on the nightstand. Leah switched on the nightlight and adjusted the covers around Denver’s shoulders before leaning down to kiss him.

  “Sleep tight, Captain Levy.”

  His far-to-thin arms snaked around her neck. “I love you, Mommy.”

  “I love you, too, darling.”

  Leah moved aside to let Stratton say goodnight to Denver. In a few seconds, they would be alone. Would he say anything about what happened earlier, or would he go downstairs to his office like he had every night since they got married?

  She heard the soft click of Denver’s bedroom door closing, and then, “Do you feel like having coffee with me?”

  It was the invitation she wanted, but his ‘Dr. Levy’ tone doused her enthusiasm. “I’d love, too.”

  Stratton waved a hand toward the stairs. “After you.” He didn’t say anything else until they reached the kitchen. “Maria knows I often stay up late. She always makes me a pot of coffee before she goes to bed.”

  Leah sat down on the bar stool he pulled out. “I’ve enjoyed getting to know her.”

  “She likes you, too, which is a compliment. Maria doesn’t warm up to everyone.” He reached into the cabinet for the cups. “If we’re lucky, there might be some cookies left.”

  In spite of her nervousness, this remark brought a faint smile to Leah’s face. Stratton didn’t deviate from his ultra-healthy diet often, but he always made an exception for chocolate chip cookies. She found his weakness for them particularly endearing. There weren’t many things she could do for him personally, but since moving into the house, she made sure the cookie jar was always full of his favorite treats.

  She opened the lid and peered inside. “Never fear. We’ll have something to dunk in our coffee.”

  He set a steaming cup in front of her. “I just remembered something. You don’t like to drink coffee l
ate at night. It keeps you awake.”

  * * * * *

  Stratton saw the flash of surprise in Leah’s eyes before her lids slid down over the irises that reminded him of the baby blue eyes Jade had planted in the courtyard.

  “I’ve relaxed that rule now that I’m not working.”

  “Do you miss it?”

  Leah broke a cookie in half and dipped one end in her coffee. “I thought I might, but I don’t.”

  “So you’re not bored spending your days with Denver.”

  A sweet smile danced across her lips. “Not at all. It’s refreshing to see the world through his eyes. Everything is so new and unspoiled. Children are the perfect example of living each day to the fullest. They find joy in simple things.”

  “I agree. You might not be missing work, but Hutchison Clinic isn’t the same without you.”

  “Lydia said my replacement is less interested in nursing and more interested in finding a man, preferably a doctor.”

  “See what you started. Now they all think they can do it.”

  “I didn’t start it. You did. Before you came along, I had a strict rule about not getting involved with coworkers.”

  He laughed. “Much to the disappointment of all the single male staff. Dr. Michelson texted me while we were putting Denver to bed. He asked if I could fill in for him at a symposium at Medical College of Georgia. The event starts this Thursday and runs through the weekend. That’s also when Jade and Joel are going to visit his parents. I hate to leave you and Denver alone, but I’m the only physician at the clinic who knows enough about this new technique for hip surgery to take Dr. Michelson’s place.”

  “Don’t worry about us. We’ll be fine. I’ll think up some extra-special things to do so Denver won’t miss you so much.”

  He smiled faintly. “I doubt he’ll miss me as much as he did before. He’s got a mommy now.”

  “I hope you don’t really think that.”

  “I don’t mean anything bad by it. I knew Denver would love you, and it makes me happy to know I’ve given him something he’s wanted for so long. That brings me to something much less pleasant. Three weeks from now he has to go to Emery Hospital in Atlanta for another round of doctors’ appointments and tests. We’re usually there three or four days. Having you along will make a scary experience less so. You’re very much a part of that security we talked about earlier.”

  “I hope so,” she said quietly.

  She lowered her eyes, but not before he saw the tears in them. Her distress and anxiety caused his insides to clench. “I’m so sorry, Leah.”

  “For what?”

  “Pulling you into my nightmare.”

  “You didn’t pull me. I came willingly.”

  “It’s a debt I can never repay.”

  She put her hand over his. “It’s not a debt, Stratton. It’s a gift.”

  He stared down at her hand. “A gift I’ve done nothing to deserve.”

  “That isn’t your call to make. Just as beauty is in the eye of the beholder, a person’s deeds are best judged by someone other than himself.”

  He drew away from her. “Don’t make a hero out of me, Leah. You’ll only be disappointed.”

  She stood up and took her cup to the sink. “Even the best heroes have flaws. I wouldn’t think you’re any different. I’ll see you in the morning.”

  After she left, Stratton didn’t go to his office to do paperwork. Instead he went to the courtyard. He told himself he needed this nightly mental retreat. What could be more soothing than listening to the fountain and feeling the cool breeze coming off the ocean? But those weren’t the reasons he was sitting in the dark.

  His eyes found their way to the window of Leah’s room. He stayed where he was until the light went out.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Leah had been awake for some time when she heard the sound of water running. Stratton was taking a shower. Sharing a closet and bathroom wasn’t new to someone who’d grown up in a house with four girls, but brushing your teeth while standing next to a shirtless Mr. Universe was a totally different kettle of fish. Trying not to look at him was impossible with wall-to-wall mirrors revealing every ripple and sinew of muscle.

  Night before last, he walked in on one of her late night bubble baths, complete with dim lights, scented candles, and soft music. His eyes had nearly popped out of his head before he remembered to turn around. It hadn’t done much good, not with the aforementioned mirrors everywhere.

  “I’m sorry,” he said in a voice very unlike his usual one. “I should have knocked.”

  “And I should have remembered to lock the door.”

  In the reflection of the mirror, she saw him smile. “Let’s hope you get better at remembering to lock the door, because I’ve gotta lot of incentive to forget to knock.”

  It was those kinds of comments that made it so difficult to figure out how he felt about her. Especially since he’d chosen to ignore what happened over the weekend. Leah didn’t know which was worse: the fact that Stratton could kiss her with such fervor and say nothing, or the fact that he showed no desire to repeat it.

  In the room next door, she heard the hum of an electric razor. This was followed by the sound of him moving around in the dressing room. Funny how such seemingly trivial things could become so important. It begged the question that was beginning to haunt her more and more. What was she going to do when there were no sounds to wake up to?

  Pushing aside the duvet, Leah slid out of bed and walked over to the window seat. Although it was still dark, the sky was clear. Stratton would have good weather for his drive to Augusta. He’d be gone four days. Four very long days.

  Movement below caught her eye. One of the garage doors was opening. A few seconds later, the outside lights flashed on and Stratton came into view, luggage in hand. In spite of having said their goodbye’s last night, she couldn’t help feeling disappointed that he hadn’t looked in on her before he left. This wasn’t a good sign for someone in her position. She was projecting onto Stratton her own expectations for a relationship that hadn’t actually changed.

  Once the truck disappeared, she got up and went to take a shower. As usual, Denver was waiting for her when she came out of the bathroom. She dropped down beside him on the bed and put her arm around him.

  “Good morning, sweetie pie.”

  He picked up her hand and played with the rings on her finger. “Why do you wear these?”

  “Because someone I love very much gave them to me.”

  Denver grinned. “Is it Daddy?”

  Leah tapped him on the nose. “You know it’s your daddy. Are you ready for breakfast?”

  He nodded. “I hope Maria made chicken waffles. I asked her last night.”

  “Chicken waffles, huh? Well, I like waffles and I like chicken, so I should like them together. Let’s see about getting you out of those pajamas and into some clothes.”

  Denver hopped off the bed, grimacing when his feet hit the floor. This wasn’t anything new, but each time it happened, Leah’s heart lurched in her chest. It was much the same every morning and evening when she watched him take the regimen of medicines to control his growing list of symptoms. The storm on the horizon was getting ever closer.

  When they reached the kitchen, they had more than chicken waffles waiting on them.

  “What’s this, Maria?” Denver asked, dropping Leah’s hand so he could inspect the wrapped box sitting on the table.

  Maria grinned as she exchanged a quick glance with Leah. “I don’t know, pequeño. It was there when I got up this morning.”

  “There’s a card attached,” Leah said.

  Denver ripped open the small envelope and handed her the card. “What does it say, Mommy?”

  Leah pulled out a chair and lifted Denver on her lap. “To Captain Levy, here’s something to keep you busy while I’m gone. Love, Daddy.”

  “Can I open it now?”

  “Of course.”

  The wrapping hit the floor in r
ecord time. “It’s a paper boat kit. Daddy told me that he and his brother used to make these, and then they would race them in the lake behind their house. Can we put them together today? Then we could try them out at the creek.”

  Jade had told Leah stories about the mischievous exploits of the Levy brothers and how they earned the title ‘double trouble’. Sullivan had been the mastermind behind their adventures leaving his older brother to extricate them from any problems they encountered. It seemed Stratton hadn’t abandoned his role of protector. He willingly took on whatever was necessary for those he cared about.

  “That sounds like a great idea,” she said, moving the box out of harm’s way. “We’ll start on them right after breakfast.”

  * * * * *

  Stratton spent the drive to Augusta wishing Dr. Michelson’s wife hadn’t scheduled her third cosmetic surgery this particular week. Ever since Denver became ill, Stratton tried to avoid trips out of town because of an irrational fear that something bad was going to happen while he was gone. It had been somewhat understandable before, but it should be easier now that he had a nurse living in the house.

  As he crossed the Savannah River and entered Georgia, his thoughts turned to the past. The downtown area of Augusta looked virtually unchanged since his time there. The sight of the brownstone where he shared an apartment with Reggie and Tifton brought a smile to his face. Back then the only thing he had to worry about was making it through medical school. Tragedy hadn’t yet cut into his existence, ripping away the security and comfort of ignorance to reveal the ugliness waiting to destroy his peace of mind.

  After parking in one of the garages, he located the education building and checked in with an efficient-looking woman at the registration desk. She provided him with a name tag, a packet of materials, and directions to the lounge set aside for the presenters. Since it was still early, he had the room to himself. Stratton passed on the donuts, but did help himself to some coffee.