SOMEBODY'S BABY

by Marilyn Pappano

  They arrived at the restaurant shortly after noon. Sarah wore her blue dress again, and even Katie was in a dress, although she wasn't quite certain she liked the lace and the bows and the patent leather shoes that replaced her tennis shoes.

  The Adams family was seated at a large table in the center of the dining room. When they saw Daniel and Sarah, they insisted that the three join them. Sarah ended up between Daniel and Zachary, while Katie got the seat of honor between Bonnie Adams and Zachary's grandmother.

  After a moment's talk, Sarah turned to Daniel. "I saw a pay phone out there," she murmured. "I want to give Beth a call. Order for me, will you?"

  "Do you need some change?"

  "No, thanks. I'll call her collect, and she can put it on that bill I'm going to pay someday." She excused herself and left the dining room for the small foyer and the phone. It took a moment for the operator to put the call through; then Beth came on the line, sounding sleepy.

  "I got a message from Zachary Adams that you wanted me to call. Is anything wrong?"

  "Nope. I was just checking on you. Is everything okay at your end?"

  "Everything's fine." She shivered as the door opened to admit more customers and a blast of cold air. "I would have called sooner, but this is the first time I've come to town since Daniel gave me the message."

  "Well, the big day's only four days away. Are you getting excited?"

  Sarah wrapped the phone cord around her finger. "Actually the big day is five days away."

  "Five?"

  "Friday. The second. Can you be here?"

  The silence at Beth's end of the line was heavy. Finally she asked, "We're talking about two different big days, aren't we? I mean getting custody of Katie again. You mean…"

  "Getting married to Daniel."

  She waited for her friend's explosion, for all the arguments against marriage in general and marriage to Daniel in particular, but none of them came. Instead Beth asked, "Are you happy?"

  "Yes."

  "Do you love him?"

  "Yes."

  "Does he love you?"

  This time it was Sarah's turn to be quiet. She waited until the customers coming through the door were inside the restaurant, then said, "He still hasn't said so, but—"

  "But he's realized that marriage is his only chance of keeping Katie, and so what if he had to take you, too? At least he'll have someone to keep his bed warm." The instant the last word was out, Beth said, "I'm sorry, Sarah. God, I'm sorry. I know you told me last week that you loved him, but I didn't expect it to come to this, not so quickly—although I don't know why. I can't think of anyone in this world who needs love more than Daniel Ryan. And I don't know anyone who needs to give love more than you. I guess you two are a perfect pair. Forgive me?"

  "Of course." Sarah hesitated a moment, then asked, "Beth feeling the way you do about Daniel, why did you tell Zachary about Tony?"

  She could feel Beth's tension over the phone line. She knew the other woman well enough to know that she was sitting straighter, that her green eyes were flashing, her mind racing. "I didn't tell Adams anything about Tony. I called him Friday and asked if he could get a message to you to call me. That was all. Does he know about Tony?"

  "Daniel does. I—I assumed that you told Zachary, and he told Daniel."

  "What exactly did Daniel find out?"

  "I don't know." Sarah twisted the phone cord tighter until it was biting into her finger. "He saw Zachary Friday afternoon and got your message. He was upset when he came home, and when I finally got him to talk about what was bothering him, he said, 'Tell me about Tony.'"

  "You hadn't told anyone anything?"

  "No. It's hardly something you bring up in casual conversation."

  "You didn't leave anything lying around—no papers, no pictures?" Once again Sarah told her no. "Damn! I bet they hired a P.I."

  "A private investigator?" Sarah's voice broke on the last word. It was inconceivable. People like her didn't get investigated. That was for crooks, criminals, people who couldn't be trusted.

  Beth swore again. "It fits—it all fits! He gave you access to Katie and got you to trust him, so you wouldn't be suspicious. Hell, any fool could see that you already thought Ryan was next to God because he took Katie, so he used you."

  "No." Conviction was strong in Sarah's voice. "Daniel wouldn't do that, Beth. You're too suspicious. You deal with people like Brent so much you forget that not all men are like him. Daniel isn't."

  "Sarah, open your eyes, sweetheart. Remember how adamant he was about keeping you away from Katie when you first moved there? For nine days he wouldn't let you near her except for one brief visit. He was convinced you were some sort of monster. Then suddenly after a talk with his lawyer, he opened his house and his heart to you. And now he's somehow found out about Tony, when you went to such pains to keep that secret." Beth sighed deeply. "Why the sudden change of heart? And how did he find out about Tony?"

  Sarah was painfully silent.

  "I'll bet you next month's vacation that he hired a private detective. If I'm wrong, you can go to the Bahamas in my place."

  She unwrapped the cord, then stared at the pearl ring on her finger. "Why would he do that? He had to know that eventually I would tell him why I'd given Katie up."

  "Did he question you about it a lot?"

  "Well … yes."

  Beth hated to say the next words, but she had to. "The only way I know of for him to find out about Tony is through a P.I. And the only reason I can think of for him to hire a private detective is to gather information to prove that you're an unfit mother in a custody suit for Katie."

  Sarah blinked back the tears. "No. I don't believe that. He asked me to marry him, Beth. He gave me his grandmother's ring!"

  "Sweetheart, I'm sorry." Beth swore softly. "Maybe I'm wrong, okay? Maybe—" But she couldn't think of any other plausible explanation. "Let me do some checking. I can find out pretty easily if someone's been snooping around. You can call me back tomorrow afternoon."

  "No. I'll ask him." Daniel was an honest man. If she asked, he would tell her… The thought trailed off. If he was guilty of what Beth suspected, then he wasn't an honest man; he'd been lying to her all along. What would stop him from lying again?

  No! With every ounce of feeling in her heart, she knew that Beth was wrong. Daniel loved her. He hadn't said so simply because the words were foreign to him, but he had shown her. He had treated her as if she were the most precious gift he'd ever been given. He wouldn't go behind her back and hire a private detective. He wouldn't take advantage of her, wouldn't lead her on, while he was planning a lawsuit to take Katie from her. He wouldn't do that to her!

  "I've got to go, Beth. I'll talk to you in a couple of days, okay? And I'll see you Thursday. Why don't you plan on spending the night and staying for the wedding Friday?"

  "Sure, Sarah. If you need anything, let me know."

  Sarah hung up the phone and reentered the dining room, making her way to the table, sliding into the chair next to Daniel.

  "Why can't I ever get Beth Gibson to talk to me that long?" Zachary complained good-naturedly.

  Her smile felt false. "Maybe you catch her at the wrong times."

  "Or maybe you talk about the wrong subject," Daniel added darkly. He was studying Sarah's face, taking note of the stress lines around her mouth and eyes. He had known that the lawyer wouldn't be pleased by the news of their marriage, but he hadn't expected the effects of her efforts to change Sarah's mind to show so clearly. And that was only in a phone call. It would be even harder for Sarah when Beth showed up in person Thursday.

  "That's a lovely ring," Alicia commented when Sarah reached for her tea. She looked expectantly from Sarah to Daniel, then back again, waiting for a response.

  Sarah resisted the urge to hide her hand, and the ring, under the table, knowing it would only hurt Daniel. She just wasn't certain that she wanted to discuss their plans for marriage before she had a chance to clear up Beth's sus
picions. But she knew Beth was wrong. Daniel wouldn't have her investigated, he wouldn't accuse her of being an unfit mother, and he certainly wouldn't marry her simply because it was his only chance of keeping Katie. He was too good a man to do such awful things. So what could it hurt to share their news?

  The younger woman was waiting, and now the other two were watching curiously, and so was Zachary. Finally Sarah smiled. "Thank you. It belonged to Daniel's grandmother."

  "And does it have some special significance?"

  "You're nosy, Alicia," Zachary chided.

  "It's all right." Sarah looked at Daniel. His hand was clenched around his fork as if he might break it, and he couldn't meet anyone's gaze. Dear God, she loved him more than she had ever loved anyone but her children. He couldn't be guilty of the awful things Beth suspected! Easing his fingers from the fork, she held his hand in hers, smiled at everyone around the table and announced, "Daniel and I are going to get married."

  The simple dinner out turned into a celebration that eventually moved from the restaurant to the Adams' house. It was late afternoon before Daniel and Sarah said their goodbyes and headed home.

  "Beth wasn't pleased, was she?" Daniel asked as he turned off the highway onto the narrow country road. He'd wanted to ask the question all afternoon, but he'd never gotten even a moment alone with Sarah. He wanted to know what the lawyer had said, wanted to know how to counter her arguments against him.

  "Beth handles a lot of divorces. I'm not sure she believes in second chances or happily-ever-after." Sarah wiped a trace of chocolate from Katie's chin. Mrs. Adams had served a freshly baked chocolate cake, and Katie had thought she was in heaven. She had stuffed as much into her little belly as possible, and had smeared a fair amount on her outside, too.

  "Are you having second thoughts?" he asked quietly. If she was, he would have to chase them away somehow, and the only way he knew how was physically, by loving her long and hard all night.

  "I love you, Daniel," she said simply.

  Reassured by her soft words, he let the rest of the drive pass in silence. When they got home, he carried Katie, who was almost asleep, balancing her on one shoulder while he inserted the key in the lock.

  "Daniel?" Sarah had stopped on the top step, and her hands were clasped together. "I have to ask this—for Beth. I know it's not true, but I told her I would ask."

  As the door swung open, he turned to look at her. "What?"

  "How did you find out about Tony?" She was looking at him, but her gaze was focused on Katie instead of his face. "I thought she had told Zachary and he had told you, but she didn't. She thinks you hired a private detective to investigate me. She thinks you're going to try to take Katie away from me. I know it's not true, but—"

  At the strangled noise he made, she lifted her eyes to his, and her heart began thudding in her chest. He looked so guilty. Dear God… Covering her mouth with one hand, she spun away, unable to face him any longer.

  He set Katie on the floor, jarring her awake, and held her until she was steady. "Go lie down on the couch, sweetheart," he said, giving her a push in the right direction; then he took a step toward Sarah. When his hand touched her shoulder, she shuddered and jerked away.

  "It is true, isn't it?" she asked, her voice thick and broken. "You lied to me. My God, all the lies…!"

  "Sarah, listen to me," he pleaded, touching her again. This time she slapped his hand away.

  "Listen to you? To more lies?" She hugged her arms across her stomach as if she might keep the pain inside. If it spread, if it got out, it would surely destroy her. "I trusted you, Daniel. I thought you were such a good, honorable man, and you used me!"

  "That's not true, Sarah." Panic laced through him, making his hand tremble when he touched her once more. "Let me explain—"

  She interrupted him with a hysterical laugh. "Explain? You think you can explain why you betrayed my trust in you?" She stepped back to dislodge his hand. "Did you hire a private detective?"

  "Yes, but—"

  "Are you planning to sue for custody of Katie?"

  "Not anymore. Sarah—"

  Not anymore. Beth was right. Sarah wanted to scream, to fall to her knees and sob out her sorrow, but she wouldn't do that, not in front of him. "And Zachary was in on it."

  "Yes."

  Her shoulders sagged under the burden of his admission. Squeezing her eyes shut, she slowly shook her head back and forth in silent denial. Then she looked at him again. "So Zachary handled the legal end, your detective handled the investigative end, and you … you handled me."

  "No, Sarah, that's not the way it was. I—" He forced the words out, driven by fear, by desperation. "I love you."

  The pain inside her grew hotter, sharper. They were the right words, but given at the wrong time for the wrong reason. "All this time I told myself that you loved me, that you didn't say it because the words were difficult for you," she whispered dully. "But it just wasn't true, was it? That's why you never said it. I made excuses for you at the same time that you were lying to me with every breath you took! Why, Daniel? Why?"

  He sighed, feeling the chill spread through him. "I couldn't let Katie go," he said in a low unemotional voice. "She was all I had. If you took her away, you would have taken my life, too. I couldn't risk losing her."

  "So you hired a detective to prove that I'm not fit to be her mother. And when you got his report and there was nothing in it to support that, you decided the only thing to do was marry me. You didn't have to convince me—you didn't even have to claim to love me." In spite of her vow not to cry in front of him, the tears, hot and stinging, were spilling down her cheeks. "Beth was right. Marriage was your only chance to keep Katie. So what if you had to take me, too?"

  He grasped her shoulders and shook her. "Damn it, Sarah, stop it! You know that's not true! I wanted you—wanted to make love to you, to be with you, to spend the rest of my life with you. Yes, being married meant that we could both have Katie, but it also meant that I could have you, and that's just as important. I need you, Sarah. I love you."

  His words couldn't penetrate the thick sorrow that surrounded her. "This past month I've been comparing you to Brent and telling myself how much better you are—a better man, a stronger man, a more loving man." She gave a sad shake of her head. "You're no better than he is. He was a bastard … but at least he was an honest bastard. I can't even say that much for you."

  He took a step back, then another and another until the wall was behind his back. She hated her ex-husband; she'd told him so yesterday. Now she hated him, too. And the worst part of it was that he deserved it. For the things he'd done, the lies he'd told, the trust he'd betrayed, he deserved her hatred.

  "Excuse me." She walked past him into the house, letting the screen door close with a thump behind her. Upstairs she found her laundry bag, neatly folded in the linen closet, and slowly, methodically filled it with her clothes. Back in the living room, she added the photo album and Tony's books, then knelt on the floor beside the couch. "I have to go now," she whispered to Katie, even though the child was asleep. "I can't see you for a couple of days, but Thursday I'm coming to get you, and we're going to go so far away from here that Tennessee won't mean a thing to you. He won't mean a thing. We'll be so happy together that we'll forget he even exists, I promise."

  She brushed a kiss over Katie's cheek, smelling the rich chocolate from the cake. "I love you, sweetheart. I'll be back for you."

  Drying the tears from her face, she stood up, removed the pearl ring and laid it in the center of his cleared desk, then got her keys from his coat pocket. Holding the laundry bag in both arms, she went outside. Daniel was standing where she'd left him, the look on his face one of heartache, of guilt, of loss.

  "We're supposed to meet in Zachary's office to sign the papers at one o'clock on Thursday," she said, her voice dull and empty. "Bring her with you. Then file your lawsuit and we'll see who's not fit to take care of my daughter."

  He didn't speak, didn
't try to stop her, didn't try to hold her. He just stood where he was and watched the only woman he had ever loved walk away from him. Away from his house. Away from his life.

  The bedroom, was cold, and the skin of Daniel's chest and arms was unnaturally icy, but he made no effort to pull the quilt higher. It rested across his jeans-clad legs, where it had fallen when he'd lifted it to cover himself and had smelled Sarah's scent, warm and sensuous and innocent, all over it. The bed smelled of her, too, and so did the couch downstairs. That was why he was spending the night in the chair, staring at the cold fireplace.

  There had been no lights on at the house down the hill. He had watched all evening for some sign of her, some sign that she was safe at home, but there'd been nothing. Maybe she had driven into town to call her lawyer and had spent the night there. Maybe she had returned to Nashville. Maybe she'd wanted to stay as far away from him as she reasonably could until Thursday.

  He couldn't blame her. She hated him, but she couldn't hate him any more than he hated himself. He'd made excuses to justify what he was doing—how he was lying, how he was betraying her—but he'd known all along that there was no excuse, no justification. She was right to hate him, right never to forgive him … but dear God, he would get down on his knees and beg her if she would try.

  She was the only woman who had ever seen past his size and his blunt manners to the man inside. She was the only woman who had ever loved him. Why hadn't he valued and treasured her love? Why had he risked losing it with lies and deceptions?

  He gave a deep sigh, but it sounded more like a sob. It sounded, he thought miserably, like the final break in an already broken heart.

  The room was cold with the kind of chill that made her teeth ache, that made her very bones throb with pain. Sarah didn't need to peer out from beneath the covers to know that the fire was out. The three logs that had been left on the hearth had burned quickly. The rest of the wood, stacked neatly out by the shed, had been soaked in last week's rain and was still too wet to burn. When she had tried with one log, it had sizzled a little, smoked a lot, then fizzled out. And it was thirty degrees or colder outside.