Unveiling Hope

by Jeannine Allison

  We watched Alara laugh as Gabe picked her up and threatened to toss her in the ocean fully clothed. Alara’s loud giggles were uninhibited, and just the sight made Gabe’s grin grow.

  Everyone was happy when Gabe proposed to Alara a couple months ago. I’d never seen her so happy with another person. She more than deserved that.

  I still thought about the first time I saw her break down. The first time I realized her depression wasn’t a temporary thing she was blowing out of proportion. It had been a horrible presumption to make. But it wasn’t me trying to minimize her pain, it was me hoping that she wasn’t experiencing something so debilitating. Something there wasn’t a cure for. Something that would never pass.

  And we were helpless: Naomi, me, her family. All we could do was watch her drown. I’d like to think we got better at helping her as the years went on; that we were quicker to see the signs and better at knowing what to do, but it would always be hard.

  “It’s good you suggested this,” Sam whispered. Her hand slowly found its way to mine, holding tight and strong, like she knew I needed an anchor.

  Taking advantage of Gabe and Alara’s distraction, I turned my head and kissed Sam. She squeaked in surprise before melting into it. Her hands found my shoulders and she dug her nails in.

  I gently cupped her jaw and angled her head, taking the kiss deeper. It only lasted a few seconds before she was pulling away and resting her forehead against mine. She turned toward the ocean, checking to make sure they were still distracted, before looking at me again.

  I let her go and stepped back.

  The only thing that curbed my frustration was the fact that she seemed just as annoyed as I was that we were still keeping this a secret. I shrugged. “Just say the word and we can tell them.”

  Sam wrapped her arms around her midsection as a cold breeze came in off the ocean. “This week is about them.” Her eyes sought her brother out once more. “Gabe told me Alara wants to get married at the end of the week.”

  “What?” Alara wasn’t usually the spontaneous type.

  “They’d still have a big ceremony with her family, but she wants to marry him here. And he wants us to help make it happen. He already called Naomi and Sherry. They can only come in for the one day, but that’s all we need.” Sam smiled. “We can tell them after. Okay? I don’t… I don’t know what Gabe’s reaction will be, and he deserves this time to not worry about anything.”

  I tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear. “Promise?”

  She reached out and grabbed my hand, squeezing. “I promise.”

  Alara and Gabe being so sickeningly in love worked in my favor for the most part. The four of us spent a few blocks of time together, but mostly they wanted to be left alone, which meant Sam and I could sneak off without raising any red flags.

  Today was not one of those days. It was Friday and we were all headed to the beach.

  Naomi, Damien, Sherry, and Hunter were all set to arrive tomorrow night and the wedding would take place on Sunday. Damien’s sister, Ellie, and her boyfriend couldn’t make it because her son had gotten sick. And in true Naomi fashion, she practically hijacked the project and started planning it, even from a different state.

  We got to the beach and dumped our bags on the sand. Gabe and I pulled out our extra-large towels and laid them out.

  “We’ll watch the stuff, if you two want to go in the ocean,” Alara said as she adjusted the braid over her shoulder.

  “Sounds good.” Sam bent down and started digging around. I cleared my throat and turned my back before I was caught ogling her ass. She hadn’t even taken her cover-up off yet.

  I grabbed the collar of my shirt and tugged it over my head, tossing it behind me. I quickly put on sunblock and took a deep breath before facing her again.

  Holy. Shit.

  They knew. They had to know.

  Because there was no way I didn’t look like a cartoon with my tongue hanging out and my eyes bulging from my head right now.

  Sam was wearing a black one-piece. The top wasn’t low-cut—it rested just beneath her collarbone. The thin straps went over her shoulders and down her back, meeting the bottom half of her suit, just above her ass. Her entire back was bare. And if that wasn’t tempting enough, so were her sides.

  I could see the bare curve of her breast as she lifted her arms and removed her ponytail. I stared, transfixed, as she shook her hair out.

  “Ready?” she asked with a grin as she finished putting sunblock on her shoulders.

  I was pretty sure I nodded. Looking back at Alara and Gabe, I found them wrapped up in each other again. When I turned back around Sam’s long, tanned legs were carrying her toward the ocean, and this time my eyes couldn’t help but linger on her backside. The bottom wasn’t a thong, but it didn’t fully cover her cheeks either. And now I knew she wore this just to torture me.

  I’d seen her in a suit several times already, but they were all simple bikinis. She was still hot as fuck, but the little tease knew I liked subtle sexiness. I liked the promise of more. So yeah, she knew I’d love this. And she also knew I wouldn’t be able to do a damn thing with Gabe and Alara here.

  Without saying a word, I jogged up behind her. “You’re going to pay for this,” I whispered in her ear, quickly giving it a bite.

  She yelped, but she was smiling. “Pay for what?”

  “You know what. You’re teasing me with side-boob and by having half your ass hanging out.”

  With a shrug, she walked backward into the ocean. We both laughed when she slowed and hopped up and down. “It’s freezing.”

  “Is it?”

  Her eyes widened. “No,” she said sternly, holding her finger out, wagging it at me like I was a child.

  I didn’t even hesitate. I ran straight for her, grabbing her around the waist and diving us into the water. It was fucking cold, but I wasn’t wasting this opportunity. My hand moved to the back of her head and I pressed my lips against hers. It was only a taste of what I really wanted, but it’d have to do.

  Right before we broke the surface, I let go and pulled away. She was gasping for breath and cursing at me when I came up.

  “Sorry. I couldn’t help myself.”

  “Oh yeah.” Sam was coughing. “You seem sorry.”

  We both laughed and then spent the next hour swimming around. Sometimes we floated. But most of the time was spent with Sam swimming away from me when I tried to cop a feel.

  Exhausted, we ran back up the beach and collapsed on the towel, and Alara and Gabe took their turn.

  Sam flipped on her stomach and stuck her earbuds in, while I took out my notebook to look over the last few songs I’d tried to write. She drifted off, and after a while I put my notebook away and stared at her.

  It still seemed surreal that she’d left John for me. That all my feelings were returned. That she was mine.

  But she was. And I was only days away from being able to tell the world about it.

  A few minutes later, her eyes opened.

  “Hi.” Sam smiled shyly and yawned. “What’s up?”

  “You’re stunning.” I shook my head. “I don’t know how I got so lucky.”

  “Me neither,” she said with a grin.

  We still had dopey smiles on our faces when Gabe and Alara came back. They packed up, deciding they’d rather spend the rest of the day alone.

  Sam hopped up. “I want a snow cone.”

  “Someone’s nap served them well.” I dug out my wallet and handed her some money.

  “Do you want anything?” she asked as she grabbed the ten.

  “Surprise me.” She started walking away when I called her back. I tossed her cover-up at her. “Don’t forget to put this on.”

  Her eyebrows rose as she smirked. “Why? I can walk up to a stand in my swimsuit.”

  “Because you’re hot and I’m jealous.” She was laughing when I spoke again. “Actually…” I stood up too and held out my shirt. “Wear this.”

  When it
looked like she was going to say more, I grabbed the cover-up from her and threw it in her bag. Then I lifted her arms and helped her into the T-shirt.

  “Is your inner caveman satisfied?” she asked, amused, as I stood back and stared.

  “Nope.” After rummaging in Sam’s bag, I came up with a black Sharpie. I moved around Sam and smoothed the T-shirt over her back before writing. Luckily it was a plain light gray.

  Her shoulders shook with her chuckles. “What the heck are you doing? You’re ruining your shirt.”

  “Nonsense.”

  “What are you writing?”

  “You’ll see. I’m copying it on the front.” Once I was finished I moved to the front and did the same thing above her chest. When she looked down and saw, she busted out laughing.

  Derek’s girl.

  I capped the marker and tossed it in her bag. She grabbed my hands and laced our fingers together. Pulling me closer, her lips brushed mine.

  “Pack up,” she said after she broke the kiss. “I’ll be right back.”

  Our heads were resting against one another. “Be quick,” I murmured. “Because when we get to the hotel room, I’m going to spend the rest of the afternoon fucking you in nothing but this T-shirt.”

  Sam shivered. “You know… I don’t think I want a snow cone now that I think about it.”

  I pulled her into my embrace and took another kiss. “Let’s get going then.”

  My lips tipped up into a smile as we walked hand-in-hand out of the restaurant. Derek had made good on his promise this afternoon, and with each step I took I could still feel him moving between my legs.

  He helped me into his truck before hopping in and starting down the road. I noticed we were going in the opposite direction of the hotel. “Where are we going?”

  “It’s a surprise.”

  Ten minutes later we pulled into an empty parking lot along the beach. Derek backed into one of the spots facing the ocean and jumped out of the car. I turned around and watched him pull down the tailgate and crawl into the bed of the truck.

  Curious, I got out too and met him in the back. There was a sleeping bag laid out with several blankets and pillows on top.

  “What’s all this?”

  “This is the ending to the perfect date.” Derek smiled over his shoulder at me. I returned it and made a move to hoist myself up. But he held out his hands to help me before I could.

  “You look so beautiful tonight, Sam,” he whispered as we knelt on the blankets. “I love when you get all dressed up like this.”

  Smiling, I shook my head and looked down. “You say you love it when I’m dressed down too.”

  “I do.” His finger gently tipped my chin up. “I want to mess up your lipstick. To strip all your clothes and rake my hands through your hair until it looks like you just rolled out of my bed.” Derek’s hand cupped my cheek.

  “I love you made up.” He grinned. “Because I love unmaking you.”

  “I love it too.” My arms looped around his neck. He brought his arm around my body and slowly dragged his fingertips from my nape, down my spine until his hand was hovering over my butt.

  “I love a lot of things. I love the curve of your back when you arch into me. I love the constellation of freckles on your left shoulder. I love how you let out a soft moan whenever I do this…” Derek dipped his head and kissed the spot under my ear. He continued down my neck until he was at my cleavage.

  “T-that’s it?” I panted, my head tipped up.

  “Definitely not. I love the look you get on your face when you’re playing music. I love your obsession with snickerdoodles. And the way you always play with Rory when you get home. Even if you’re in a hurry to get somewhere else. You take those few minutes and show her affection.”

  With each proclamation, he placed another kiss on my chest. Now Derek lifted his head and I was stunned to see tears in his eyes. They matched my own.

  “I love how you see the best in me. That you bring out the best in me.” He swallowed roughly. “Sam, I lo—”

  “Wait!” I rushed out, resting my fingers on his lips. Derek looked confused and hurt so I quickly continued. “Not yet. Soon, just not yet.”

  “I don’t understand.” His hands fell from me and I grabbed them, putting them back until he was cradling my cheeks again.

  “Trust me. Please. It’s not because I don’t want to hear it. Or that I can’t say it.” I shook my head. “I’m not explaining this well. Just please, trust me.”

  He was still confused, but he didn’t appear hurt anymore. “Of course I trust you. I don’t think there’s anyone I trust more.”

  Still holding his hands against my face, I whispered, “Kiss me.”

  Derek immediately leaned down and sealed his mouth over mine. He licked my lips and I eagerly opened for him. “Shut the gate,” I mumbled against his lips. Leaning over, he slammed it shut while I fell back against the blankets.

  He slowly unmade me just like he said he would, before I helped him take off his clothes. We crawled under the blankets to avoid the chill from the ocean.

  Derek fumbled with the condom, but when he finally got it on he wasted no time in slipping inside me. My legs wrapped around him, my heels digging into the backs of his thighs.

  I moaned as he started moving. His eyes never left mine. “Derek…” I murmured, overwhelmed by all feelings coursing through me.

  “Sam,” he groaned. And my tears spilled over. Because he made my name sound a lot like I love you would.

  He changed the angle, going deeper. My breath hitched and I clenched around him.

  “You’re killing me, Sam.”

  There were no more words. Just his hands running over my body and mine clutching him to me. Just his body thrusting into me while I eagerly accepted him.

  He lowered his body, no longer propping himself up but instead settling his weight completely over me. Derek’s arms slid over my shoulders and beneath the pillow my head was currently thrashing against. Our foreheads rested against one another. I was completely surrounded by him, and I loved it.

  “Sam,” he growled. His mouth crushed mine as his thrusts grew frantic.

  “D-Derek.” My voice shook.

  All at once, our climaxes hit together. He whispered words of praise into my skin and I chanted words of prayer to the sky.

  As we came back down, I realized this was the most perfect moment of my life. I wouldn’t change a single thing.

  The night was black around us, and I listened to the waves crash against the sand. I smelled the salt in the air and tasted Derek on my tongue. He stayed inside me and we kissed slowly.

  When he finally pulled out and away, the loss I felt was about more than sex. He had become a part of me in a way few people ever experience.

  I was so in love with Derek I didn’t understand how there was ever a time when he wasn’t in my life. Now he was the very center of it. How did a world exist without its axis? How had I existed without him?

  After he discarded the condom and dropped down beside me, his head turned toward me, I could tell he was feeling the same way.

  He pulled me close and I went eagerly, wrapping myself around him.

  I wasn’t falling and waiting for him to catch me. He wasn’t either. We jumped into this together, holding hands. And if we crashed, we’d crash together.

  I’D BEEN IGNORING DEREK for most of the night. Not because I wanted to, but because I knew the second I paid him any attention my feelings would give me away. He looked like temptation. I didn’t even have to be facing him for my thighs to clench, thinking about him filling me up when we got back to the hotel room. I just had to get through a couple more hours.

  We were at a restaurant right along the beach, sitting at an eight-seat table that looked out over the ocean. The deck on the other side was empty because of the storm currently rattling the windows.

  Alara and Gabe’s wedding had concluded just in time. The first few drops of rain fell as we ran off the beach.r />
  Sherry elbowed me. “Hey, that hot guy is totally checking you out.” I followed her line of sight until I landed on a guy at the bar.

  “C’mon.” She grabbed my arm, pulling until I was standing. “What’s stopping you?”

  I kept my eyes on Sherry. But really all I wanted was for Derek to stop me. He couldn’t possibly be okay with this. And yet, he said nothing. He was okay with letting me walk off and approach some random guy?

  And even though I knew I was responsible for keeping us quiet, I still expected something. He could come up with some way of keeping me here, like guilting me into staying or… something. Anything.

  I snuck a glance his way and found his jaw clenched tight as he scowled into his drink. When it became clear he wasn’t going to say anything, I shrugged. “Sure. I guess.” Sherry didn’t comment on my slumped shoulders or very forced smile as we walked away.

  As we walked over I told her I wasn’t interested, but that didn’t deter her. And while I wasn’t a meek person, I’d be lying if I said she didn’t intimidate me a bit. Most of the time I went with the flow because it seemed easier than making more waves.

  Turning around, I saw Hunter close behind us, and I couldn’t help but look at Derek. Gabe said something that had him lifting his head, and his dark eyes met mine. But he looked away just as quickly, downing his whiskey before standing up and pulling on his jacket.

  I turned around just as we reached the bar. Sherry was saying something but I couldn’t make sense of any of it. I didn’t want to be over here, and my eyes, knowing where they truly wanted to be, found Derek. He was walking away.

  God, why did this have to be so hard?

  Because you’re making it that way, my inner voice taunted.

  I frowned when I saw Derek moving toward the exit. The weather was terrible. Was he leaving for the night?

  I felt Sherry tap on my shoulder and turned around to find the guy holding two drinks.

  Had I even said anything since we’d walked up?

  Several awkward minutes of small talk later, and Sherry abandoned me. The guy—Tim?—rested his hand on my upper arm, giving it a squeeze while he told me about his basketball league.