The fact that he could say it so nonchalantly floored Tonya. It must have shown on her face. Tracy was staring. Her eyes held a flash of empathy before the anger bled through. Abruptly, Tracy stood.
Their father turned to her then as if really seeing her for the first time. “What’s wrong with you?”
“So using your own daughter as a nurse and pretty much denying her the right to live her own life isn’t hurtful?” Tracy kept her voice steady. She crossed her arms over her chest, looked their father dead in the eye, and waited.
His mouth literally dropped open. The stunned expression only lasted a few seconds before fury set in. “You don’t talk to me like that.”
“Like what? So I shouldn’t tell the truth? Out loud anyway. I haven’t raised my voice, called you names, or disrespected you at all. It’s all true, whether you want to admit it or not, and the fact is, you’re still trying to keep her from being who she is.”
He sputtered like he was about to say something but couldn’t get it out.
Tonya was proud of Tracy, and she had never felt closer to her than in that moment. Hope snaked its way into her chest and lodged there.
“I’m an ass for not saying something sooner. I’ve never seen you hug her or be nearly as affectionate with her as you are to me. You don’t think that hurt her then and now? What was she doing when I was cheerleading and hanging out with my friends? Why didn’t she get to do the things I did? I’m not blind, Daddy. At least not anymore.”
“We all had to make sacrifices for the family.” He stood then, chest puffed out and head held high.
“For a long time, Mama didn’t have a say in the matter. I don’t remember you giving up anything that I saw. Tonya nearly sacrificed her whole childhood, and you wanted her to do the same with her sexuality. Obviously, you still do after that stunt you pulled yesterday.”
He clenched his hands into fists and his whole body stiffened.
“She’s filling your head full of bullshit. I…none of it happened that way.”
It was her turn to speak. Tonya had so much to say, but she condensed it down to one question. “What’s your perspective then, Daddy?” There was no malice in her voice
He whirled around and looked at her in surprise. Had he forgotten she was even there? He started to glare and back away, moving quickly. This was when he usually ran, when things got too heated or when the truth was too big. Could she keep doing this? She caught Tracy’s gaze, and again her sister clearly read everything on her face
“Sit down, Daddy.” She pointed at his chair. “If you don’t, you’ll be lucky to get more than a text from me for a very long time.” Tracy’s tone was firm, expression shuttered.
Tonya relaxed minutely. She was impressed with her sister’s strength and will.
“I know none of this can be fixed in a day, but you can at least try for all our sakes. We’re all the family we have.”
Slowly but surely, Robert sat back down. Several emotions flitted across his face, and for once, he was easy to decipher. He was shocked, confused, upset, even sad. He reached for his coffee cup and brought it to his lips. His hands were shaking. Hours seemed to pass, but still he said nothing.
Tracy caught Tonya’s gaze. Tonya saw optimism in her sister’s eyes. Feeling another gaze, she glanced over to see her father staring.
He looked away quickly.
“Daddy?” Tonya was too tentative to say more.
“You were the oldest. I remember how you wanted to help.” His voice was scratchy, thick. “I didn’t mean to let it go that far. It was just…easier.” He didn’t look at her. He didn’t get up.
Still, relief uncurled in Tonya’s chest, splashing warmth through the rest of her body. She’d gotten validation from Dr. Finn, from her sister, from Haley, but there was no equivalent to receiving it from her father. He’d only said couple of sentences, but Tonya considered it a solid first step forward.
Tonya swelled with emotions. She couldn’t decipher them all. She was overwhelmed, and her eyes started to burn. Someone touched her hand. She glanced up to see Tracy smiling. Before she could pull away, Tonya slid her hand into her sister’s.
“Thank you.”
Tracy’s eyes were glassy. “It’s the least I could do.”
* * *
Haley was wound so tight it was hard to concentrate. Her body was humming, and it was all Tonya’s fault. Yeah, not that she minded. Only a complete idiot would be bothered by something like that.
She finished her Cap’n Crunch and drank the remaining milk. Her spoon clattered as it hit the side of the bowl. Haley stood and moved toward the kitchen. Maybe a good workout would give her some perspective and tap into a whole different set of endorphins, sort of. Then, when she got home, blowing shit up on her Xbox would hit the spot. Within minutes, she was out the door.
An hour and a half later, she stepped into her own shower. Her entire upper body felt like jelly, and parts of her still burned. It was a beautiful thing, but the whole workout plan had done absolutely nothing to clear her head. If anything, she was more focused on Tonya than before. Her palms actually itched. All she wanted to do was pick up the phone and call her just to hear her voice, her laugh, and her sarcasm. Haley groaned and tilted her head back, letting water pelt her face. Jesus Christ, this was getting out of hand in the best way possible.
Haley grabbed her phone as she reentered the living room and made a call.
“Hey, honey.” Her mother sounded chipper, just like she always did. Haley smiled.
“Hey, Mom.”
“I was just thinkin’ about you.”
“Jethro singin’ my praises again?”
Her mother chuckled. “You know better, but I got him handled; nothin’ to worry about.”
“I don’t even wanna know what that means.”
Cathy hummed cryptically. “So how’s your week been?”
“Same old. Tang is still goin’ through some stuff. I’m doin’ my best to snap him out of it. The field isn’t a place to get distracted.”
“You’re right about that. Maybe…maybe you should think about movin’ on to a partner who can separate the personal from the professional and pull his weight.”
“Mom, no! I can’t just leave him, and it doesn’t work like that. I had to work my ass off to get where I am with him now. You know things were rocky at the beginnin’. He knows he’s in a bad way and that it’s affectin’ me. He’s actually scared I’ll try to leave ’im.”
“This is your life we’re talkin’ about. I know loyalty is a big thing for you, but you breathin’ is more important to me.”
“Mom—”
“Dammit, I’m naggin’ and I always said I wouldn’t do that. You know I worry, but I don’t wanna bog you down with it.”
Haley smiled despite the heaviness of the conversation. “I worry too. I have to. I know I haven’t been doin’ this long, but I think if I didn’t feel anythin’ that would be really bad.” She sobered. “I know I put you, Nate, and Jen on pins and needles, and it’s the nature of the job. Anythin’ can happen out there, no matter who my partner is. I don’t take any of it for granted, believe me.” Haley took a deep breath and made the decision to put everything out there on the table. The thing with Tonya wasn’t abstract anymore. It was developing lines that were coming in clearer every day.
“Good. I know why you do this, and I don’t wanna change you. I never have.”
“I know, Mom.” Haley paused and then let her feelings take over. “Tonya gets worried too.”
“Who’s Tonya?”
“I met somebody. It’s kind of an interestin’ story if you wanna hear.”
“Well, it’s just stupid to even tease me like that. Of course I wanna hear. What’s wrong with you?”
Haley laughed and told her how they’d met.
“Holy shit.” Her mother’s words were full of surprised wonder.
“Mom!”
“What? Like you’ve never heard that come outta my mouth bef
ore.”
“I have, but still.”
“Whatever. That’s a beginnin’ with bang.”
“I totally agree.” Haley smiled and leaned back on the couch.
“Things like that happen for a reason.”
Haley had never thought about it like that. “Maybe.”
“I haven’t heard you talk about a woman since what? College? And it wasn’t like I got to meet that one. I haven’t met any of your girlfriends, except for the neighbor’s kid you were foolin’ around with in middle and high school.”
Haley laughed. “You knew about that?”
“I’m your mother. I suspected. I knew you didn’t go over there to play with her dolls when you guys were younger, and I don’t remember being that happy when I was a teenager after a sleepover.”
“I’m not even sure how to respond to all that.”
Her mother scoffed. “It’s not like you could’ve gotten her pregnant.”
Haley laughed even harder. “Stop!”
“Let me guess, you were the daddy when ya’ll played house?”
Haley couldn’t breathe. Her mother was having way too much fun with this.
“Okay, okay, what were we talkin’ about?” Cathy chuckled. “Your girlfriends?”
It took a few more minutes, but Haley was able to calm down. “All right, well, you haven’t met anyone because there really hasn’t been anyone except for that mess in college. She turned out to be someone I definitely wouldn’t bring home.”
“Oh, I see. So do I need to prepare myself to meet this Tonya soon?”
Even though nobody else could see her, Haley smiled so hard that she was damn close to giving herself a headache. “Maybe. Yeah, probably.”
“Well, if we subject her to Jethro, that might scare her away.”
Haley snorted.
“And she’s okay with the whole cop thing?”
“We have an understandin’. She gets it. I think she gets me.”
“What do Nate and Jen think of her?”
“They haven’t met her yet, but they’ve been helpin’ me navigate the waters, so to speak.”
“I don’t get it. If she’s that special and they are right there, why haven’t they met yet?”
Haley didn’t hesitate. “I’m not ready to share her.”
Her mom was quiet for a few seconds.
“Ohhh, sweetie.”
Heat flooded Haley’s face. She wasn’t embarrassed. It was more like a rush of emotions, reminding her of all the good things that had been happening. “Yeah, I know. It’s only been a little over two months since we officially met, but—”
“That doesn’t matter.”
Maybe it didn’t. “Mom?”
“Hmm?”
“Have you really been in love that many times?”
Cathy burst out laughing. “No!” She lapsed into a chuckle. “Not all the time, but I don’t like bein’ alone. If someone fits me comfortably, that’s usually enough for me.”
“So Jethro is like an old pair of shoes?”
“Pretty much.” There was amusement in her mother’s voice.
Haley heard something in the background. Speak of the devil. “Did we conjure him up?”
“Stop,” her mother whispered, trying unsuccessfully to smother her laughter. “Seriously, though. I know he hasn’t always been respectful, but that’s gonna change. I shoulda nipped it in the bud a long time ago.”
Yeah, she probably should have. “Okay.”
“I’m gonna go. Call me if you need me.”
“Okay, Mom.”
It was easy to understand where her mother was coming from, but Haley didn’t want comfortable. Somewhere along the way, she’d figured out that she wanted the bells, whistles, and sparks, and that was just the beginning. Shit, to be honest, she wanted the whole roller-coaster ride if it made her feel anything like she did when she was with Tonya. If drama was part of the package, Haley was willing to take that too.
Haley didn’t realize that she’d fallen asleep until she was jerked awake by somebody pounding on her door. She sat up quickly and rubbed her eyes, trying to wipe away the cobwebs. The banging kept going.
“Hold on!”
She reached for her cell phone on the table. It was almost one o’clock, and she had two missed calls from Tang.
Haley parted the curtains, and sure enough, he was standing there. He caught her looking, and good God, he was even worse off than when she’d seen him last. That shouldn’t have been possible. Tang didn’t smile as he gazed back at her. His eyes were bloodshot, haggard, and maybe a little puffy. Had he been crying? Whatever brought him here must have been over-the-top bad. She unlocked the door and pulled it open.
Tang stumbled inside. Was he drunk? He didn’t smell like it. He must have been exhausted as all get-out. After the conversation she’d had about him with her mother, seeing him like this made Haley livid.
“What the actual fuck, Tang? Why didn’t you just ring the bell? You worked a double, didn’t you? You told me you were gonna—”
“Get off my fuckin’ back! I can get all the rest you fuckin’ want me to get now. Those sons of bitches fired me. How goddamned pathetic is that? I’m a cop, and I got fired from a shitty security job.”
Haley’s heart dropped as she stared at him. She reached out and touched his shoulder. He flinched slightly, and then she noticed that he was shaking. “C’mon.” She led him to the couch and made him sit. “What happened?” She sat down beside him.
“I fell asleep. It was my third warnin’.”
Haley didn’t say anything.
Tang leaned forward and buried his face in his hands. “What am I gonna do?” His words were muffled.
“Get another job. Maybe you can find somethin’ downtown or at the casino.”
He glanced up at her, and he looked so lost. “Honestly, with everythin’ I gotta take care of, I only had about a fourth of the money. I probably wouldn’t have made the deadline anyway. It’s not easy gettin’ on at the casino, and I worked for Ochsner. They own just about every hospital in Orleans Parish. There’s no way they’ll let me back in.”
“Shit. Well, maybe Crest Manor will accept what you have and give you time.”
“They won’t. They were pretty clear. I let ’im down. He never did that to me, but I let ’im down. He’s gonna have to come home. Medicare isn’t gonna pay for around-the-clock care. I can’t put him in some shithole. That’s the only thing they’ll pay for. He deserves better than that.”
Haley wished she had the money to give him, but the couple hundred in her bank account wasn’t enough. Haley sat there and listened while he came up with some tentative ideas and dismissed them. She even offered to see if she could borrow the money from Nate and Jen. Eventually, Tang could barely keep his eyes open. Haley stood and pushed him back on the couch.
“I should… I should get home.”
“No, you’re crashin’ here. You don’t need to be alone. The couch lets out into a bed, but it’s just as comfortable like it is.”
Tang gave in without a fight. She helped him take off his shoes, then went to find a spare blanket and pillow. When she got back, he was already snoring, so Haley covered him up. She stared at him for a few minutes, wondering how much more it was going to take for him to go off the deep end.
Chapter 20
Haley smiled, then covered a yawn as she watched Tonya dip part of a scone into her coffee. It was certainly a unique way to eat carbs in the morning. CC’s Coffeehouse had a few stragglers, but they were the only people sitting down. The place had barely been open an hour, so everything was spotless. Haley kind of hated these café-style places. Even though the dark wood of the countertops and tables was eye-catching, she disliked the tiny tables and chairs. They were uncomfortable as hell.
It was early to be up and out, but Haley would get up at the ass crack of morning every single day if it meant she got to see Tonya. It was Thursday, and the second time this week they’d met for coffee.
Haley was proud as hell that she’d suggested it. There was no way on earth that she could wait until the weekend. No way. Seeing Tonya was like starting the day on a really special high. Not the drug- or alcohol-induced kind either. This feeling had a purity to it. Haley sipped at her own coffee. It was getting cold, but she didn’t care.
Tonya looked completely put together for so early in the morning. Her outfit was simple: cream-colored blouse that flashed a tiny amount of cleavage and offered just a peek at defined collarbones along with gray slacks that looked soft as butter. Her legs went on forever, and the material clung to her curves in a way that made Haley want to reach out and follow the lines. Her makeup was flawless and barely there, but somehow it made those big brown eyes even bigger. Then there were the dimples that flashed every time Tonya smiled, which was a lot. Tonya was at a face-melting level of hot, and here Haley was in a pair of drawstring shorts and a T-shirt with no graphics to at least make it interesting.
“Has Tim perked up at all?”
Haley almost missed the question. She was happy to just sit there and stare. That wasn’t weird. Was it? She grimaced. “No, not really.”
“The symptoms of situational depression can get pretty severe. You’re a good friend trying to help him through it, but if you feel like it’s affecting his job, encourage him to get help. It can just be between the two of you. I’m not saying this just for him. He’s your partner, and he’s the only one there to watch your back. It’s…worrisome.”
“I can understand that, but I was more worried about that when he was working his ass off than I am now. Still, I’m keepin’ my eye on him just in case.”
Tonya gazed at her. Haley knew her reassurances weren’t really enough, but they were all she had. She reached over to snatch a piece of Tonya’s scone, but Tonya smacked her hand away.
“I’d be more than happy to get you a cruller.”
Haley smirked but kept her hand close to Tonya’s. “Ah yes, cops and donuts. That’s an awful stereotype.”
“I know nothing about those.” Tonya’s eyes glittered with amusement.
“Ha-ha.”
“Mm.”
Haley pushed her coffee away. She was done playing with it. “So you know, speakin’ of friends, and I use that term really loosely with these ladies.”
Between the Lines Page 22
