Under the Ice

by Aaron Paul Lazar

  I clipped the lead onto Maggie’s halter ring and ran my hand down her neck. Her eye flickered toward me.

  “What’s wrong, girl? Do you have a stomachache?” I gently led her toward the aisle.

  She walked stiffly, stilted. Her head hung low.

  “Come on, girl. That’s it.”

  Maggie’s eyes dulled. She was in serious trouble.

  Siegfried waved a turkey baster and a giant sized bottle of mineral oil. “Here it is,” he said, his eyes wide with worry. He set the bottle on a shelf and unscrewed the cap. Carefully, he sucked up a large bulb full of oil and held it ready. “Where first, Professor?”

  I pulled up Maggie’s halter so that her head rested in the crook of my arm. She tried to rub her ears against my chest, but I held her still. “This end. Let’s get as much down her as we can, then we’ll go at it from the other end.”

  Siegfried lifted the tube and inserted it into the side of Maggie’s mouth. He raised the bulb slowly and squeezed.

  Maggie pulled back, raising her head to get away from the baster.

  “Whoa there, girl. Settle down,” I said.

  Oil spurted onto the floor. She backed up toward the wall. I let her back herself into a corner. Stroking her broad cheeks, I soothed her until she seemed calm. “Okay, try it again.”

  Sig approached slowly. Maggie’s eyes rolled. He spoke to her in his softest German, entreating her to let him help her. “Maggie. Schoene Maggie. Alles ist gut.”

  She struggled a little, giving in as he dosed her with three bulbs full of mineral oil. This was the easy part.

  “Professor, you must walk her. Then we will try the other end.”

  Walking was essential to keep the intestines moving and hasten the digestion of the enormous amount of grain she’d ingested. It also kept her from lying in her stall and rolling. I began the walk that would likely take all night.

  Camille joined us, taking turns walking the mare. The light from Shelby’s table lamp shone from her bedroom. When I walked Maggie around the driveway, I saw her curtain flutter. I hadn’t accused her, but was almost certain she’d been responsible.

  When Camille switched with me again, she put her mittened hand on my arm and exhaled a plume of frosty air. “Honey? Should we cancel the trip tomorrow?” Her dark eyes flashed in the cold night. Light snowflakes whirled in the air and landed in her hair.

  I shook my head. “She should be fine by morning. We just need to be sure she never gets out of that stall again.” I felt tired and cranky, and knew my words sounded sour.

  “Shelby?” she asked.

  I nodded. “I think so.”

  Siegfried nodded from his seat on the hay bale. He’d been walking and dispensing mineral oil for hours. “Ja. It was just after she cleaned the stall.”

  She looked up at her daughter’s window. “Why isn’t she down here helping?”

  I shook my head. “I don’t know. Maybe she’s embarrassed. Maybe she’s talking on your phone. Who knows?”

  “What? Wait. She’s grounded from the phone.”

  “Yeah, but I caught her on your cell the other night. While we were asleep.”

  “Who was she talking to?”

  “She wouldn’t say.” I cupped my gloves over my mouth and blew to warm up my nose and face. My ears tingled with cold as well. I yanked down my watch cap and pulled up my hood.

  Camille rolled her eyes and sighed. She leaned her head against Maggie’s neck and stroked her nose. Her frozen breath puffed into the cold night. “Where did we go wrong, Gus?”

  I stomped my feet to keep the circulation going. “I don’t think it’s us, honey. We’ve done our best. Now we just have to wait for it to take.”

  “Really? Because I feel responsible when she acts out like this. Like I failed her.”

  I took her arm, turning her toward me. “No. You’ve done a fantastic job under very difficult circumstances.”

  “Thanks.” She shivered and her teeth chattered. “I should do laundry for our trip. Do you want me to go in and start a load?”

  I leaned over to kiss her cold lips. “Go inside, hon. We’ve got it covered. And thanks for the help. Maggie thanks you, too.”

  Maggie shoved her nose against Camille, making her laugh. “She seems better, don’t you think?”

  “Yeah. Much. I think she’ll be okay. But, just to be sure, we’ll keep this up for another few hours.”

  Just as we parted, Freddie’s van rolled into the driveway. She’d been stuck at the clinic in surgery for the past six hours.

  She ran toward us. “Dad? What’s wrong?”

  I explained, and she leaned her head against Maggie’s side to listen.

  “Why didn’t you call me?”

  “We had it covered. And Sig knows what to do.” I motioned to our faithful giant, who smiled and looked embarrassed.

  Freddie examined Maggie and listened again, this time with her stethoscope. Just as she was about to poke her sides again, Maggie lifted her tail and performed the act we’d been waiting for all night. The pungent scent hovered, then washed away in the cold night air.

  Siegfried and I laughed with relief.

  Freddie patted the mare on her nose. “Good job, lady. You’ll be okay now.”

  I was glad she didn’t ask how the mare had gotten into the grain bin. I didn’t want to face that topic again.

  “I think you can put her to bed now,” she said, scratching behind Maggie’s ears. “She’s probably just as tired as you two are.”

  I stayed out with the mare for another hour, just to be sure. She seemed fine, no thanks to our teenaged monster.

  Chapter 44

  At noon on Wednesday, we lined up our suitcases by the kitchen door and were ready for our mini-vacation to Toronto. Mrs. Pierce had just fed the twins, and Johnny jackhammered around the room. This would be his first trip away from home without his mother. He was thrilled, rather than worried. Maddy and Joe agreed to stay at the house to help Freddie and Mrs. Pierce tend to the twins and animals, so the home front would be well tended.

  In private, I’d asked Joe to stay over so I wouldn’t worry about undue attention from a certain ex-convict. Although his target was Shelby, having a cop in the house helped me breathe easier. Also, I hoped to give Joe a reason to go outside again. Maddy had successfully escorted him to the day program for the past two days, reportedly with less trauma than when he visited us last. Today and tomorrow, they would hunker down at our place while we shamelessly frolicked in Toronto.

  Joe sat at the kitchen table with a mug of coffee. Contentment crinkled his face, and I felt a surge of relief flow through me. He looked good. Well, at least better. The shadows quivering beneath his eyes were not as pronounced today, although he’d reportedly suffered a mild panic attack on his way into our house.

  Maddy flounced around the room, smothering Camille, Shelby, Johnny, and Siegfried with hugs and kisses. I grabbed two suitcases before she could collar me and ducked out to my daughter’s van to stow them in the back. Freddie had taken the Jeep to the clinic in the morning, so we’d be able to accommodate our large crew and our luggage.

  I came inside to grab the last bags, but Siegfried had already snatched them and was out the door. Maddy looked at me with a faux frown and threw her arms open. “Gustave? Don’t think you’re getting away without a smooch.”

  I snorted a laugh. She rarely called me by my full name, and it reminded me of childhood reprimands from my mother.

  My inimitable mother-in-law minced toward me and dragged me to her bosom.

  I sniffed, testing the air. Her perfume wasn’t as overpowering as usual.

  She locked her hands around my neck and planted a big kiss on my cheek. “You have fun, you hear?” she said, light dancing in her eyes. “You need a break. And so does my little girl. No running into bad guys for the next two days. Agreed?”

  I shuffled backward, wiping lipstick off my cheek. “That’s the plan.”

  Joe grabbed his coffee mug an
d started toward the pot on the counter.

  Maddy noticed, and shrieked. “Joseph? No! I’ll do that for you, Honey Bear.”

  I raised an eyebrow and whispered to Camille. “Honey Bear? That’s a new one.”

  Joe grinned sheepishly. “Okay, Schnookumberry.” He sat down and handed her the cup.

  I covered my mouth so I wouldn’t laugh and leaned down to take Johnny’s hand. “All set, pal?”

  His eyes shone and his feet tapped staccato on the linoleum. “I been ready since yestaday.”

  Siegfried came back inside. “Okay, Professor. Auf geht’s.”

  We piled into the van and drove north on Route 390 to the ferry landing in the port of Charlotte on Lake Ontario, just north of Rochester. The roads were dry and powdered white from the salt spread every day for the past few months. Temperatures were predicted to mellow over the next week. The sun warmed my face as we wound along the highway toward our destination.

  Johnny chattered in the back beside Shelby. She’d been subdued and distracted all morning. I thought it was probably due to yesterday’s incident with Maggie. We hadn’t discussed it yet, and she hadn’t offered apologies. I decided to wait until she approached me. She half-heartedly answered Johnny’s incessant questions.

  “Are you sleepin’ in my room, Shelby? Can we have French fries for supper? What color is the tub? Are there big buses in Tawonto?”

  Siegfried sat in the middle row. The top of his head touched the van’s ceiling. Camille relaxed in the passenger seat. Her face showed the wear of the past week, evidenced by smudges beneath her eyes.

  We reached the terminal in fifty-five minutes. I’d planned on an hour and fifteen, to be sure. Glad we wouldn’t need to rush, I unloaded the car and organized the troops. We rolled the suitcases along behind us and approached the facility with a spring in our steps.

  The ferry, The Spirit of Ontario, towered over the building. Magnificent, sleek, and monstrous, its white sides gleamed in the bright sun.

  “That’s as high as the sky,” Johnny shrieked, dancing at my side.

  I reached down and grabbed his hand, afraid he’d dart in front of a car in his enthusiasm. “It sure is, buddy. Can you believe we’re gonna ride on it?”

  Siegfried seemed as awestruck as Johnny. “Mein Gott,” was all he could manage.

  Shelby’s eyes grew wide, but she continued to avoid me, instead focusing on her nails.

  Camille grabbed her hand and trotted toward the terminal. “Come on, guys. Let’s go.” I was encouraged to see a hint of her usual sparkle as she bounced toward the entrance with her daughter.

  In order to bring Johnny and Shelby with us across the border into Canada, we needed notarized notes from both parents. Because his father was incarcerated, Freddie had full custody of Johnny. She’d given us the court documentation, her notarized permission note, and his birth certificate. Oddly enough, the situation was identical for Shelby. After a few moments of intense conversation with two of the customs agents, we were allowed to pass into the waiting area.

  The terminal still smelled new, with gleaming floors and neatly arranged chairs lined up in rows in the sunny waiting area. I’d been given a tip from a colleague about waiting near the entrance so we might claim the coveted seats in the front of the boat. Since we were so early, we were the first to queue near the door.

  Johnny jumped and leapt around the waiting area.

  I kept him close by my side, but he couldn’t stand still. And as much as I hated to admit it, it was already starting to wear on me. “Hey, buddy? Wanna play a game? How many jumping jacks can you do? Do you know what those are?”

  Johnny looked up at me with interest. “Like dis?” He clapped his hands above his head with his feet spread out. Next, he lowered his hands and brought his legs together.

  “Good. That’s it. How many can you do, sport?”

  Johnny jumped and swung his arms for the next five minutes. He counted to forty-five before he tired.

  “Wow, that’s gotta be a record, buddy. Are you tired?”

  He shook his head, but stopped jiggling around. “Nope. When do we get on the boat, Opa?”

  Thankfully, in the next minute, the doors opened. An agent took our tickets and we wound our way through a long corridor that brought us up to the level of the three-story-high craft. We boarded and walked quickly toward the bow.

  Chapter 45

  “Here.” Siegfried pointed to three captain’s chairs in the front of the boat. With a broad grin, he motioned for Johnny to sit beside him. Shelby chose the single seat on his other side.

  Camille shrugged and gestured toward the pair of seats across the aisle from Johnny. “How’s this for us?”

  “Perfect,” I said.

  I smiled at Johnny, who bounced like a wild monkey in his seat. Siegfried pointed to a boat churning up the channel, and Camille settled on my other side.

  Sitting in the front row before the wide windows spanning the bulkhead, it felt like we were piloting the vessel. Although there was a crust of ice around the harbor, the main channel seemed to be free from ice floes.

  Johnny stood on his seat, pointing out the window. “Look!”

  A coast guard boat hovered at starboard, waiting to escort our ferry through the waterway.

  After the passengers boarded and settled in, The Spirit of Ontario began to glide toward the open water.

  “This is surreal,” Camille whispered.

  We chugged along, admiring the houses lining the sides of the strait. Winter walkers waved at us. The horn blasted, and we sped toward the open lake.

  Within minutes we were underway, churning through the green-gray water of Lake Ontario. We angled northwest. The entire experience felt otherworldly, almost as if we were on the deck of a great starship. Siegfried managed to keep Johnny in his seat while Shelby ignored us all. She’d been distracted and aloof all morning, and didn’t seem about to switch back to her sweet personality.

  I settled in to watch the other passengers strolling to the front to look out the windows. They perched on a low ledge for a few minutes, and then returned to their seats.

  Shelby jumped up and started to walk down the aisle toward the back of the boat.

  Camille called to her. “Honey? Where are you going?”

  “Geez, Mom. I’m just going to the bathroom.”

  “Want me to come with you?”

  My daughter sighed and blew her bangs sideways. “No, Mom. I’m not six anymore.”

  Shelby was six when she was struck by a truck and sent into a coma for nine years. It was an odd comment for her to make, and when I saw Camille flinch, I took her hand and squeezed it.

  “Um. Okay, sweetie. Don’t be gone long.”

  She didn’t answer, but slunk away toward the mid ship where the snack bar and restrooms were located. I watched her disappear and turned back to my wife.

  “You okay?”

  “I guess.” Camille didn’t look okay, and she checked for Shelby every five seconds. After thirty minutes, she put her book down and frowned. “Where is she?”

  I jumped up. “I’ll go look for her. I was going to buy some hot chocolate for Sig and Johnny, anyway. Do you want some coffee, honey? Or something to eat?”

  She shook her head and opened the lunch bag she’d packed in her tote. “No. I brought some apples and cheddar cheese. And I’ve got a six-pack of bottled water.”

  I smiled. Her organization skills rivaled mine. “Looks good. I’ll have some when I come back, okay?”

  She nodded and began to sort out the spread on my seat. “Okay. Hurry back.”

  I strode briskly toward the middle of the ship, passed the restrooms, and emerged into a large central area where a cafeteria-style counter spread almost from port to starboard. I didn’t see Shelby.

  I walked up and down the aisles. Poked my head into a movie theater. Chased up the curving stairs with the stainless steel banister and up to a bar. Clomped down again and walked through a small gift store. No Shel
by.

  The back of the ship was open, but it was freezing outside. Could she have wandered onto the stern deck?

  I passed a few people with drinks in their hands and pushed out to the back of the deck. The wind whipped at my clothes and hair. Four brave souls were bundled up at the tail end of the deck. A few sported cameras. They strung out along the railing that overlooked the churning engines and clung to the railing, trying to keep their balance. Twin foaming trails snaked behind the massive craft, churning water into an icicle-green froth.

  Grabbing hold of the metal railing, I made my way toward the back to check around both corners.

  No Shelby.

  I couldn’t see the faces of any of the people who clung to the railing, as they were hooded and muffled with scarves. Two stood together, and two stood several feet apart. I wondered if either of them could be Shelby or…Rolf.

  Was it possible?

  I crept along the deck, fighting the dangerously strong wind and peering through slit eyes. Freezing drops of Lake Ontario sprayed my face and shirt. It was nuts to be outside without my parka. It was crazy to be out there in any circumstances.

  When I reached the figures at the end of the deck, I recognized Shelby’s dark blue jacket, with her hood pulled up tightly. She turned toward me just as I was about to reach her. The face of her companion was still hidden.

  “Dad?” she shouted. The wind snatched the word from her lips. She looked concerned, then angry. “Dad!” she shouted, as if in reprimand. I could read her eyes. “Are you trying to ruin my life?”

  She turned and ran back toward the door, struggling to stay upright in the stiff gale. The figure against the railing didn’t move. He seemed a little broader in the shoulders than I’d pictured Rolf, but it could have been the jacket. It was difficult to see through the glacial wind. My face felt numb with cold.

  A sudden gust and roll of the ship rammed me against the rail, knocking the air from my lungs. I clung with blue hands to the wet rail, struggling to regain my balance. Before I could pull myself back up, someone shoved me flat on my face. Dark clad pant legs hurried past, racing toward the door.