Family Portraits

by JoAnn Aitken

  He stood right in front of her now. “And who is this?” he asked, looking at Eddie.

  “This is your son. His name is Edward Claude Gascoyne, and he will be one year old tomorrow.”

  Katherine had never known Eddie to be speechless. She was sorry that she hadn’t broken the news more gently. “Want to see something neat?” she asked him.

  “Sure.”

  “Come sit with me on the steps,” she invited. They sat down, and she held the baby on her knee. “Quel age as-tu, Eddie?” she asked the child. Up went one finger. Two eye bats, and his little face raised for kisses. “Bonne fete, my angel,” she congratulated him. He beamed and clapped his little hands.

  “Do you want to play too?” she asked her husband.

  “I don’t think I can,” he responded slowly in a most un-Eddie-like voice.

  “Would you like to hold him?” she inquired.

  “Okay.” And he took him from her.

  The baby couldn’t take his eyes off Eddie. He wasn’t particularly familiar with men, but he seemed to intuit that there was something special about this person. He sat happily on his father’s lap and pleasantly poked at his face. He seriously wanted to play with the sunglasses which hung from the neck of Eddie’s shirt.

  “This is why you left me,” Eddie said.

  “I kept hoping my Eddie would come back,” Katherine told him. “But when I found out I was pregnant, I had to go. It broke my heart,” she said simply.

  “That’s all in the past, my love,” he said. “I promise you.”

  “Come upstairs with me while I put Eddie down for a nap. Then we can talk about everything.”

  Katherine sat on a love seat, her child cradled in her left arm. She nursed him, talking softly to him about all the wonderful things that had happened that morning. The little guy was sleepy after the fresh air and excitement, and his eyelids were heavy. Pictures of his mommy and the kittens and the brown person with the shiny toy passed through his head. Soon he was in dreamland.

  Eddie sat on Katherine’s right. As she tended to their son, he lowered his face to her shoulder. “Ma femme. Mon amour,” he whispered. Katherine knew he was crying, but she would never let on. Gascoyne men didn’t cry. She gave him a minute and then rose to put the baby in his crib.

  She turned to her husband. “And now it’s just us,” she said. “Please tell me what has happened to you,” and she sat beside him.

  He took a deep breath and began. "I went to the Kinoshita meeting. I was completely out of control, and Larry tried to keep me from going into the conference room. He said he would tell them I had the flu, and he would carry the ball. I refused.

  "I’ll spare you the details of my behavior, but after about five minutes, Larry asked if we could break briefly and got me out of the room. He said we needed to speak privately and took me into a stairwell. The meeting was on the mezzanine of the Embassy, so the stairs at that level go directly to the parking garage.

  "He got me about half-way down, as you can imagine I was protesting vigorously, when we rounded a corner where his driver Marc, you know, the huge guy, and Pete Rowntree were waiting. Baby, they strong-armed me down the rest of the way into a limo that was waiting at the door to the stairs. They literally kidnapped me. Although I was really coked up, I couldn’t fight them.

  “I tell you this: if things had gone wrong, those guys would be in prison now and I would be dead or, at the very least, living on the street, I owe Larry Villeneuve my life, and I will never forget.”

  “My God, Eddie,” Katherine clutched his hand. It seemed a miracle that he was here beside her at this moment.

  "Larry went back into the meeting and said that I had been sick and taking medication…you know. Of course they didn’t believe it, but it was the best he could do. Naturally, by lunch, everyone in town was talking about Eddie Gascoyne’s meltdown.

  “I didn’t know it, but Larry had been in contact with a rehab facility for a couple of months. He told them he didn’t know exactly when it would happen, but he would get me there when it did. They were waiting for me, and sent me to detox for two weeks. Then I was in the program for four months.”

  “How did Larry know it would happen that day?” she asked.

  “You knew, didn’t you?”

  “Pretty much. I had never seen you that bad. I was really scared.”

  “Well, Larry was the one who brought me home at five o’clock that morning, and he knew.”

  “Oh, my God, baby. What was it like in rehab?”

  “Actually, it was good. It was undoubtedly the best thing that had ever happened to me – besides meeting you, of course.”

  “Of course.”

  "The place was first-class, up in Squamish. Beautiful grounds and scenery. I met with a counsellor each day, and we talked about my issues, specifically why I am so driven. When I came to a better understanding of myself and my family dynamics, I understood that I must try to slow down and relax. That sounds obvious and simple, but it’s not. I’ve had to work very hard.

  “Slowing down didn’t mean lounging around, feeling sorry for myself. It meant diverting my attention from my addiction – and I don’t mean cocaine. I mean my lust for success, more and more success. I could never get enough.”

  “What did you do?” Katherine asked.

  “I kept journals about my activities and my feelings. I wrote you letters even though I had no idea where you were. I got into gardening.”

  “Gardening?”

  "Yep. I really enjoy it. I love being outside. I love seeing nature doing its work.

  "And I took cooking classes. I figured that I had owned restaurants and probably would again so maybe I should know something about cooking. I like the way that, I as a novice, have to focus and follow recipes precisely. My mother could cook a six-course meal for thirty dead drunk, but she has the knowledge and experience. For me, this has been a lesson in taking things slowly and deliberately.

  “As we progressed in the course, sometimes the instructor would put something wrong into the recipe which made the exercise more interesting. Our experience should tell us that it was incorrect, but we had to have the confidence to question or correct it.”

  “Eddie,” she laughed. “I never dreamed I would hear you talk like this. I’m so impressed! What else did you do?”

  “I exercised, walked and biked, ate, and slept great. But I yearned for you, my beloved girl. Please tell me how it was for you.”

  The horrible time came flooding back. "After I got here, I cried for five months until Eddie was born. My mother was amazingly kind, and Emma was so worried. Theresa was my best little friend, and she spent a lot of time talking to Eddie in my belly.

  “When he was born, I couldn’t believe the miracle he was, just like you. For a long time, I wouldn’t let him out of my arms, but I gradually got better and trusted that no one would take him away from me. And now he’s almost one, and you’re here, and I just keep pinching myself. You really are here, aren’t you?”

  “You tell me,” and he kissed her, gently, deeply, passionately.

  “Yes,” she said.

  “Gran, Gran, Eddie’s here,” Theresa reported excitedly. Barbara was confused. Then it clicked. “Do you mean ‘Eddie, oh, Eddie’?” she asked.

  “Yes.”

  “Well, well. Where are they now?”

  “Upstairs, I guess. It’s the baby’s nap time.”

  “I think I’ll have a coffee, that being the case,” Barbara said. “I don’t want to miss anything. Did you see him and talk to him?”

  “Yes. He’s gorgeous! And really nice.”

  “Hmm. How was Kathy?” Barbara inquired.

  “She was fine, and she called him ‘my husband.’”

  “It should be an interesting dinner, my little lamb.”

  It was obvious to Barbara that the consummation of their reunion had been triumphant. Kathy and Eddie came into the den, Eddie carrying their child on one arm, the other draped around Katherin
e’s shoulders in casual possession. He was indeed “gorgeous,” a big man with black hair and black eyes that he had passed on to his son. He smiled at her, a warm, inclusive smile, his white teeth gleaming in his tanned face. My God, she thought, what are you going to do about a man like that? She sighed.

  “Mother,” Kathy said, “This is my Eddie.” She looked like a bride, shining. She had even put on a pretty summer dress and the gold hoop earrings Barbara knew Eddie had given her for their first anniversary. As for Eddie, Barbara thought that if he were a peacock, he would be in full display. Their pure joy was outrageous.

  “I’m glad you’re here, Eddie,” Barbara said. “It’s been a long unhappy time without you.”

  “Why don’t you let Kathy give the baby his dinner now so we can relax and enjoy ours? Sit with me and have a drink.” It was not an invitation.

  “Scotch and water, ma’am,” he responded, handing Eddie off to his wife.

  They settled in. “Am I to assume you have conquered your demons?” she asked outright.

  "I’ve come to understand what I am up against, and it’s not cocaine. It’s the force inside me that pushes me to win, endlessly win. It’s not a competitive drive, just the need to secure the prize. No success is enough to satisfy the hunger.

  “I spent more than four months in rehab with intensive psychotherapy. I learned a lot about myself and something about how to fight the demon. Cocaine was a means to an end, that is, a tool to help me work twenty-two-hour days, three hundred and sixty-five days a year. Sadly, the tool became the master.”

  “Are you done with it? Has it cost you enough?”

  Eddie put his hands over his face. When he lowered them, the mask was gone.

  “Barbara,” he said, "my wife left me. I didn’t know where she had gone or if she would ever come back. Today I met the son I didn’t know I had. I missed the first year of his life. I lost millions of dollars and almost all my credibility. Only due to the loyalty of a few friends am I in a position to be working my way back.

  "However, thanks to cocaine, I got help for my deep-seated problem, and I am trying very hard to not let that demon destroy me. When I came here today, I was looking for Katherine. I didn’t think she would actually be here. Of course, I didn’t know about Eddie.

  “This has been the most remarkable day of my life. Nothing will take them away from me. Can you understand me?”

  “More than you know,” Barbara said. "I’m going to believe you and offer you any help I can give. I have a bevy of personal issues, but I have managed to leave cocaine behind for almost ten years so far, anyway.

  “Come on, let’s go and see our children in the kitchen.”

  Dinner was the most fun it had ever been. The boys immediately took to Eddie and had endless questions for him. Eddie was in an excellent mood, and he was used to children, so he had jokes and tricks that had the boys howling with laughter. Even serious Emma laughed and smiled. It did her mother’s heart good.

  Later, when they were alone, Eddie commented to Katherine that he had never seen such a sad household. The following day was their baby’s first birthday, and Eddie suggested that they have a wonderful party that would cheer everyone up. He had always been his family’s entertainment coordinator, so he knew he could pull it together easily. He also said that they should have a games tournament on the day before he, Katherine, and Eddie left to go home.

  Katherine was always turned on by Eddie’s energy and agreed to help. She knew that he would have the whole thing planned by breakfast.

  A quick trip to town in the morning brought home banners, hats, a piñata, and everything for an ice cream sundae bar. A few other family members joined the group, and the baby’s first birthday was celebrated in fine style. Marta, the housekeeper, had made a big cake and young Eddie was the center of attention to his delight. Many games of “Bonne Fête” were enjoyed by all.

  Next morning, the First Annual Maple Lane Farms Triathlon was held for the boys. It comprised two laps in the pool, a foot race to Cousin Todd’s house about a quarter-mile away and a return-bicycle race. Young Brian was the surprise winner after Billy, the favorite, crashed his bike trying to run his brother off the road.

  The Chinese checkers tournament was more subdued but still lots of fun for everybody, the winner being Emma. She was so pleased you’d think she’d won the lottery.

  The special closing event was the doll/kitten fashion show presented by Theresa and Sharon. Eddie was the Master of Ceremonies. The girls had made a big cardboard box into a stage on which they posed their dressed up dolls. The piece de resistance was when they brought out their kittens, also resplendent in doll clothes and bonnets.

  The first minute went well, with oohs and aaws from the audience, but then the kittens freaked out and ran amok, biting at their finery and trying to get their hats off. They knocked over the dolls and tried to make a break for it. It was chaos, drawing boos and jeers from the boys and hysterical laughter from the adults.

  The kittens were captured, undressed, and petted into calmness. Eddie, not sure what to do, called the contest a draw: Pumpkin Cat, Theresa’s favorite, was named The Best Personality. Miss Mew, Sharon’s cat, was named The Meanest. Both girls were satisfied and took the trophy upstairs to display in their bedroom.

  “Mon dieu,” said Eddie as he collapsed in a chair. Marta handed him a beer. Barbara, wiping tears from her eyes, said, “Eddie, I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so hard in my life.”

  “Come on,” Billy called. “Let’s go swimming!” And so they did before enjoying a great barbeque supper.

  The next morning was gray to suit the general mood. The endlessly macho Billy was near tears as he begged Eddie not to go. Eddie looked at the array of sad faces and spoke with his characteristic enthusiasm.

  “Listen, everyone,” Eddie said, “Kat and I have decided to come back at Christmas to be here for the holidays and Kat and Theresa’s birthday on the 28th. But we want you to do something for us: Kat would like you to hold a Christmas Eve Open House like you did in the old days before your husband died, Barbara.”

  “Well, I suppose I could do that,” Barbara said hesitantly. “They were really nice occasions. But I would need everyone to pitch in and help me.” There was vigorous agreement.

  “Okay,” Katharine said. “We will try to fly in on the 23rd so we can help too.”

  And so the wheel turned round.

  December 28, 1994

  Billy Sheehan loved his cousin Theresa. They had grown up together, and she had always made him feel funny in a way he couldn’t describe. By the time he was seventeen and she was thirteen, he was able to be specific. She was his, and he loved her.

  Their time together as secret lovers was about to end, at least temporarily. Billy was going away after the New Year. He couldn’t stand life on the farm any more.

  Theresa and Sharon were moving to the city with their mother who was, for the moment anyway, in good enough shape to care for them. There was a lot of skepticism within the family as to the potential success of this venture, but Barbara felt she should at least give her daughter a chance. The move also meant that Theresa could attend a prestigious private school and Sharon a first-class high school.

  In the early morning hours of her sixteenth birthday, Billy snuck into Theresa’s room to say a private goodbye. He said he would be back in six months. He promised her the future, and she believed him. “Don’t leave me alone too long, Billy,” she said.

  The Gallaghers and the Campbells

  Gordon Finnegan Gallagher, March 19, 1974

  Theresa Katharine Campbell, December 28, 1978

  May 21, 1995

  “What are your parents like?” Theresa asked him.

  “Who really knows?” Gordie replied. “They are so obsessed with each other it’s like the rest of us aren’t even there. Except, of course, for the baby, the miraculous child of their old age.”

  “How old is the baby?”

  “She’s brand new
, born on April Fool’s Day, and her name is Mary Frances.” Gordie was smart enough to realize that he needed to soften his tone in order to not sound jealous or petty, particularly since the tiny pink morsel at home wasn’t really the cause of his bitterness.

  Although Gordie was their third child, Finn had assisted in the birth. He was profoundly moved by the experience. He stayed with Molly while she slept, exhausted, and cradled the baby until he wanted to nurse. Finn told Molly that those twenty-four hours changed his life. He believed in God. His happiness was boundless; his love for his wife and baby son were like an ache in his chest. He believed in a happy future.

  Gordie was the image of Finn: handsome, tall, and slim with dark hair and piercing blue eyes. He was mischievous, bright and capable but without focus. For the first few years of his life, he followed Finn like a dog. As he got older, Finn tried to teach him things, but his slap-dash approach to projects made his father lose patience. Finn expected nothing less than perfection from himself and everyone else.

  Time passed and Gordie had had enough of hearing “Think it through” and “Focus, for Christ’s sake.” He discovered girls – or they discovered him. The endless phone calls to the house led Finn to try to caution the boy; he was deeply worried for him.

  By the time he was sixteen, Gordie was wild and wilful. Finn sent him to Nova Scotia to stay with Molly’s cousins.

  He lived there for five years, finishing high school and his Auto Mechanic certification. He cut a swath through the local girls, breaking hearts, but he somehow remembered his father’s warnings. As the years passed and no bad news arrived on their doorstep, Finn said to Molly, somewhat grudgingly but mainly with relief, “Thank God the boy’s got some common sense after all.”

  Gordie had only just returned to town a few weeks before. He was living with his parents, and he had a job at an auto repair shop. He and Finn stayed out of each other’s way. This upset Molly because, in spite of the calm and in-control manner which defined Finn to those who didn’t know him as she did, she knew he was hurt by the situation but didn’t know how to fix it.