A Place to Run

by Diane Adams

"Then there's a plan?" he said hopefully.

  Alex perked up. "I can come home?" he asked. "Mom?"

  Frank hugged Alex tight against him. "Alex, you can come home anytime, but you have to make sure you're ready to face your mother. She hasn't changed her mind. In fact, now that she believes I've been covering for you, she's worse." Frank's voice was gentle, but tears filled Alex's eyes. He blinked furiously in an effort to hold them back. "Son, Clark's mom called. She has a room for you as long as you want, and I called your school. Those advanced classes you turned down so you could come home are still available. I think you should think about it."

  Alex looked like he'd been hit. Jared was on his feet in a second. His instinct to protect Alex overwhelmed his common sense. Alex needed his dad more than Jared in the midst of their family crisis. Jared came to a stop halfway across the room, hanging back unnoticed. Alex's dad wrapped him in a bear hug and let him cry.

  Jared battled his sense of helplessness as well as his own tears. He turned to seek refuge in the kitchen. Clark stood by the stove, scrubbing at his cheeks in a futile effort to dry his tears. Unmindful of the manly space Clark usually maintained between them, Jared pulled him into a hard hug.

  Totally unlike his usual cocky self, Clark clung to him. "Is he going to be okay?"

  Jared stepped back, gripped the boy's shoulders, and met his eyes with a level look. "Of course," he replied. "Things are just a little rocky. It's going to work out." Clark didn't look convinced, but he let Jared lead him on into the room where he settled into a little used rocking chair in a corner. Jared went back to the recliner and an uneasy silence fell over the room.

  Frank looked up from comforting Alex. "Jared, I'm going to take Alex to lunch and then home to get some of his stuff. Getting him settled as soon as possible is for the best."

  Jared nodded. "Good idea, and make sure he eats. He's had about two bites of toast since yesterday."

  "Hey, you two can stop talking about me like I'm not here!" Alex exclaimed. He pulled out of his dad's embrace, sitting up to glare at them.

  Frank chuckled at his son's petulant expression. "My apologies. We'll take Clark with us and have hot dogs at that disgusting place you boys like so much. Then he can help you pack some clothes when we get to the house. How's that?" Frank cast a hopeful look in Clark's direction.

  Clark lit up at the promise of a greasy pounder and nodded in whole-hearted agreement. Alex's smile was a shadow of its usual brilliance, but it made a showing.

  "It's a good plan, Dad. Are we going now?"

  Frank got to his feet. "I don't see why not. Clark, come on, you can tell me what's least likely to kill me at The Greasy Dog." Clark jumped up. He headed for the door and touched fists with Jared on the way past. He was relieved Clark looked better, they all did. There was nothing like a dad to make things okay. Without warning, the pain of missing his father flared up, and threatened to swallow Jared in an abyss of self-pity. He gathered the rags that remained of his self-control and followed them all to the door.

  Frank put his hand on Alex's shoulder. "We'll be in the car." He led Clark out.

  Jared tugged Alex to the side, out of the open doorway to give them some semblance of privacy. "Everything is going to work out."

  Alex nodded, his eyes fixed on his face. "He doesn't know, Jared. He doesn't know how much she hates me now." Panic, just under the surface, barely contained, burned in Alex's eyes. Jared cupped his cheek.

  "She's very hurt and angry, but people get over being hurt and angry. It's going to take time, but things will be okay," he promised, his heart unable to conceive that a mother's love could turn to hate. His certainty calmed Alex.

  "Okay, okay. I should have told her. You were right, Jared."

  Jared's grin was cocky. "Of course I was. I always am."

  Alex rolled his eyes but didn't protest when Jared stepped into his space and gathered him close. He wrapped his arms around Jared's waist and buried his face against his chest.

  "I don't want to leave," Alex whispered.

  Jared's hand cupped the back of Alex's head, holding him close. "I know, but it's okay. I'll be here. If things get too crazy, you have a place to run."

  Old Friends

  Nervous, Alex looked around the dingy bus stop. Unused to facing the seamier side of life, and unlike Clark who was at home in any situation, Alex was uncomfortable. The faded peeling linoleum was gray, its original color indiscernible as was the darker gray pattern blurring it. Dingy orange plastic chairs sat in rows, most of them empty. The vending machines at one end of the terminal promised snacks and drinks Alex couldn't imagine buying. A couple of old men huddled in one far corner. Judging from their worn condition, and the things piled around them, Alex assumed they were homeless. A small family watched the parking lot eagerly, the youngest bounced with excitement. There were a few rough looking bikers lounging in the worn chairs. Dressed in black leather, covered in tattoos, long hair pulled into tails, most of them sported droopy moustaches. They made Alex nervous.

  "You're being stupid," Clark whispered.

  Alex shifted his feet and glared at his friend. He hadn't told anyone how much his mother's reaction affected him. Until their confrontation, he'd lived in an oblivious haze about being gay. He felt normal more often than not. Now he felt like he had a sign on his forehead announcing his perversion, or maybe a huge scarlet 'G' sewn to his clothes, like a book he read in school. The one with the 'S', or maybe an 'A', whatever. It didn't matter. Some kind of signal to alert everyone to his perverted nature and warn them to stay away. He wanted to forget about it, but the paranoia lingered. He didn't know if it'd ever leave.

  The bus pulled into the parking lot and saved him from trying to explain. The child with the family squealed with excitement and Alex's heart pounded. Stevie was home.

  Clark rubbed his hands on his jeans. Alex grinned and bumped shoulders with him. The reason Clark talked about girls all the time, but never tried to get one, had returned. Alex thought having a distraction from all his personal issues would be nice. At least it would be, if they could keep Stevie safe. Though he'd agreed to go along with them, Alex couldn't be happy about Clark and Stevie's plan to act like nothing ever happened. Alex thought they should tell someone. They had Jared and could tell him anything, should tell him. Alex didn't like to keep secrets from Jared, but as Clark reminded him, Stevie's trouble wasn't his secret.

  She stepped off the bus and Alex forgot all about secrets and troubles. It was just good to see her. He and Clark burst out the door as she exited, the squealing child at their heels. They wrapped the petite girl in a group hug. The soldier who'd exited behind her swung the child into his arms. Stevie's shriek of delight echoed the toddler's.

  The three clung to one another. Desperate relief had colored their parting, but even worry about her safety couldn't overshadow their happiness at being reunited. Stevie pulled back first. Her blonde hair was darker than Alex remembered and cut short, it swung level with her jaw, and her bright blue eyes surveyed Clark and Alex.

  "Oh my God, you guys are huge!" she gasped.

  Alex burst out laughing. By no stretch of the imagination could he be called huge. Bigger than when he was fourteen, thank God, but not huge. Of course, the fact Stevie's eyes lingered on Clark excused her faulty adjective.

  "And you are exactly the same size!" Clark laughed, pulling her into a rough hug. He buried his face in her hair for a second before letting her go. She really didn't look like she'd grown even an inch, though during her absence she had acquired all the female attributes Clark liked best.

  Alex laughed at the dumbstruck look on Clark's face as he stared at her. Stevie blushed, but she didn't look displeased by his attention. Alex grinned with delight as he envisioned all the payback ahead for how mercilessly Clark teased him about Jared. Sometimes life was good.

  "Let's get your bags," Alex suggested, breaking their mutual appreciation session.

  Stevie grinned, a dimple flashed in her cheek, and
Alex thought Clark would melt into the pavement.

  "Losing a few brain cells?" Alex murmured in passing, as he followed Stevie to help her drag her bags away from the bus and onto the curb. She had two huge cases. "That's all?" Alex asked, surprised. After all she was moving back, not coming for the summer. Stevie shrugged and he noticed the back pack hanging from her shoulder, stuffed as full as the huge suitcases.

  "I don't need much," she said. "Where's the car?"

  Clark caught up with them and grabbed one of the bags. "I'll show you."

  Alex picked up the other bag and lagged behind. He let them talk. Stevie might be clueless, but Alex knew Clark loved her. Alex didn't think they should take her to her mother's, but Stevie insisted she wasn't a little kid anymore and could handle herself.

  He understood Stevie didn't want anyone to find out what happened. She was fourteen when they got her out, and it wasn't her fault, but Alex was very familiar with feeling responsible for things you couldn't help.

  The afternoon Stevie showed up at their secret club in hysterics was a memory that over time had taken on the qualities of a nightmare. At first, he and Clark couldn't figure out what was wrong. When they realized she was bleeding, and where, Clark frantically wanted to tell his mother.

  Friends since daycare, the boys knew everything about becoming a woman, just like they'd told her more than any girl needed to know about growing up male. They knew about menstrual cycles and that Stevie "got hers" when she was twelve. But the flow staining her jeans was not normal, and they didn't know what to do. She wouldn't let them tell anyone and eventually it stopped. They got her clean clothes and buried her dirty ones. The three of them had a lot of secrets, but none from one another. When Stevie's mother, driven by her addiction, sold her to one of an endless string of boyfriends, she told her friends.

  Stevie had wavered between being horrified it could happen again, and irrationally worried that if she told anyone else her mother would get hurt. Alex and Clark took over, together they’d devised a plan and confronted Stevie's mother. Given the choice of being reported or sending Stevie away, her mother agreed to send Stevie to her grandmother. The recent death of her grandmother undid all they accomplished. Stevie was home and she still wouldn't tell.

  Facing the Future

  Jared frowned at the computer screen. He hated doing the books. Some help in the office would be nice. Business was so good he spent most of his nights and weekends in the garage doing paperwork. He had Clark working full-time over the summer, but Jared would have to hire someone to take his place when school started. Clark wouldn't be easy to replace. He worked hard, and most important, could be trusted with anything. Jared wondered how he'd ended up in the position of so often wishing boys were men.

  He finished up and shut down. It was time to get ready. He had to pick up Stevie and the guys for dinner in an hour. Jared looked forward to finally meeting Stevie. The guys liked her, and having Clark blushing, with Alex on the teasing end for a change, was just fun.

  Jared thought about Alex as he showered and dressed. Things at home weren't getting better, and with nothing to do, Alex spent too much time brooding. Returning to school seemed like the answer. Getting away and having another focus for his thoughts, was paramount to his being able to move forward. The way things stood, Alex either spent his time worrying about the situation with his mother or pestering Jared for sex. Alex insisted they'd waited long enough. Jared remained unconvinced. Filling the rift Alex's mother had torn in his heart with the false euphoria of sex wasn't the answer. Hiding from the pain provided nothing more than a temporary fix.

  Determined to make the last night of their aborted summer memorable, Jared dressed the way he knew Alex liked best. His belted, relaxed fit jeans rode his narrow hips and he wore a blue, button-down shirt tucked into his pants, the cuffs rolled to mid forearm. The heavy watch on his left wrist his only jewelry. He started to step into his Nikes, then on second thought laced into his work boots. It didn't hurt to indulge the boy once in a while.

  The boys and Stevie waited on the porch when he pulled up in front of Clark's house. Clark opened the front door and yelled that they were leaving. Alex wasted no time claiming the front passenger seat. He looked great. His dark hair waved over the collar of his bright red shirt. The soft, thin cotton revealed a hint of skin beneath it. Paired with a pair of khaki shorts Alex looked relaxed and hot. Jared grinned, his eyes alight with appreciation.

  "Hi! I'm Stevie!" The young lady bounced into the back seat and stuck her arm between them, hand extended to Jared.

  Shaking her hand, he grinned. "It's nice to meet you, Stevie. I'm Jared."

  The pert blonde sat back, satisfied. "He looks just as good as you said," she told Alex.

  "You don't have to sound so surprised," Jared laughed.

  She grinned, dimple flashing, and her eyes sparkling with amusement. She gave him a saucy wink. "Well, he's so gaga over you, it's hard to tell which parts are truth. Too bad he's right about the gay thing, though." Alex glared, and Stevie giggled.

  Clark climbed in and slammed the door behind him. "Mom says if we drive Jared crazy, we'll be on restriction for a week," he informed the others. "She's all worried about him for some reason." Clark chortled with delight, and Stevie patted Jared's shoulder.

  "I'm sure he'll be fine, and if he passes out, Alex can give him mouth-to-mouth."

  Jared ignored their banter, and Alex snuggled up against his arm the best he could over the center console. He checked to make sure there was a seatbelt around him but refrained from comment. He would miss the warm weight of Alex against his shoulder.

  "Please, just tell me we aren't going to the Greasy Dog," he said. Alex beamed and Jared forgot what he was saying. That smile, God knew his gravestone would say "death by smile." The way it tied his gut in knots and fogged his brain had to be illegal. Alex pressed a kiss to his cheek.

  "This one's for you. We've got reservations at The Skyline." He settled back, smugly satisfied when Jared looked at him in shock. Jared glanced in the rearview mirror, taking note of Stevie's cute sundress and Clark's uncharacteristic ensemble of dark slacks and white, collared shirt. The same soft cotton as Alex's, it showed more than a hint of his sun-bronzed skin. Still habitually a clown, Clark was quickly growing into a confident young man.

  "You could have told me," Jared muttered, highly conscious of his work boots and well-aged jeans. Alex's eyes traveled over him from head to foot. He caught his bottom lip in his teeth.

  "You look great," he said, sounding like Jared was on the menu.

  The restaurant was a nice one but not high-class enough to give them trouble about how they were dressed. "Mr Douglas." The host nodded at Jared. "I didn't realize you were with Mr. Ross's party. One moment please." Jared shifted uncomfortably, while Alex and Clark snickered. The host returned moments later and escorted them to a table near the huge windows overlooking the immaculate yard and lake.

  Once seated, Alex looked at Jared bemused. "Mr Douglas. I've been here with my parents a ton of times. We never get to sit by the windows. You've been holding out on us."

  Jared felt his cheeks heat up. The head waiter was an old friend of the family, and The Skyline was one of his mother's favorite restaurants. The older staff had watched him grow up.

  "I'm sorry to disappoint you, but Greasy Dog is not the height of my dining experience." Jared looked out the window. "Besides, they know my mother," he muttered.

  Laughter rang out at the table.

  "Geez, you didn't have to admit that." Chuckling, Alex reached for his menu.

  Jared snagged it before he could open it. "We're having Surf & Turf," he informed him.

  "Surf? Aw, man, you know how I feel about fish. Ow!" Alex leaned to rub his leg, glaring across the table at Stevie.

  "Your boyfriend's buying steak and lobster?" she said sternly. "You smile sweet and make sure you thank him. Later. After I'm out of the truck."

  Dinner was fantastic, and the movie entert
aining. Jared was pleased with how things had gone. He wanted Alex's last night home to be special, and he was rewarded for his efforts by a glowing teen in the passenger seat of his truck.

  "Can we drop Stevie off?" Alex asked when Jared turned the truck out of the parking lot towards home. Jared smiled at Stevie in the rearview mirror.

  "Sure, just point the way," he agreed, and twenty minutes later they pulled up in front of a rundown, doublewide mobile home at the end of a dirt driveway. The yard was dark. The porch lights were off and it was too far from the street for the lamps to make a difference. Jared frowned.

  "I'll be right back," Clark announced. He stood beside the truck, waiting for Stevie. She laid her small hand on Jared's shoulder.

  "Thanks, I had fun," she said with a smile.

  "We'll do it again," Jared promised, managing a smile in return. He had a hard time reconciling the ramshackle surroundings with the funny, pretty young woman. He watched them disappear in the front door.

  "Does she know Clark's in love with her?" he asked.

  Alex shrugged. "Hard to tell. I think it’s pretty obvious, but maybe she doesn't want to know." Alex looked at the house. Flickering light from one window suggested someone home watching TV. In the back of the house a light came on, and the window threw a rectangle of illumination on the ground.

  "Clark's a good guy, she could do a lot worse," he commented.

  His defensive tone made Alex grin. "We're friends, you know? Gushy stuff would change things, he knows it, too."

  Jared nodded. "Yeah, I guess, but we manage to have friends despite the gushy stuff."

  "We don't gush," Alex muttered.

  Jared bit back a smile. "Of course not, what was I thinking?"

  "You aren't funny." Alex elbowed him.

  He contemplated kissing him but Clark came back before he made up his mind.

  "Everything okay?" Alex asked, turning to face his friend.

  Clark nodded, fastening his seatbelt. "Yep. Walked her to her room. She's going to read for a while then turn in. Her mom was passed out on the couch. The usual."