She moved across the room looking like she’d been visited by another ghost. Would Katie try and contact her mother? How much information did the letter give? As of Friday, Shania and Emmy hadn’t been able to find her mother yet. Could he provide them with any new clues so Katie could get some closure, maybe even answers? Clearly, that damned letter was foremost on his mind.
“Thanks for making lunch.” She went to the sink to wash her hands and did a glucose check before taking her seat, but only stared at the plate as though she didn’t know what to do with it.
Travis squeezed her hand. “Eat. You’ll feel better. I’ll get you some water.”
When he handed her a glass of iced lemon water and sat across from her, he noticed she’d taken a couple bites of the sandwich. With that vacant look still on her face, she picked up a blackberry from her salad and nibbled on it.
Maybe he could distract her from her thoughts. “Why don’t we go for a ride this afternoon? I could load up a couple of the horses, and we can drive to a nearby trailhead. Chelsea won’t be back from softball practice until suppertime.” He’d been floored when Chelsea offered to cancel on her friends for the movie and pizza night, choosing to hang out with him instead. But they’d merely rescheduled for Tuesday. She must be pretty popular with them.
“No, thanks. I’ll be busy working with Melissa this afternoon. She’s getting worried about her performance in the Junior League show and booked extra sessions all week long.”
He cupped her cheek, and she met his gaze. “I’m worried about you. In the last couple of days, you’ve been hit with a lot. I’ve become Chelsea’s father, you’ve found out that what you’ve always believed about your mother is probably a lie, and then there was what happened between us last night. How are you handling all this?”
She finished chewing and swallowed. “You were always Chelsea’s father to me, Travis. That’s only news to you two.”
He gave a half-nod. “True. But what about your mom?” He wanted to find out how she felt about their lovemaking, too, but one thing at a time.
“I’m still in shock from finding that letter. Part of me wonders if there might be any others hidden away. I’m going to force myself not to tear the house apart looking.” She grinned, but her eyes remained sad.
“Any new clues as to where she might be living?”
Katie shook her head. “She did include a phone number. I’ll call it later today to see if it’s still good.”
“Sounds like a plan. You could even try after we finish lunch. If it’s not a working number, maybe my sisters can glean something from the letter that will help track down her whereabouts. I can call them again today if you have anything more to go on. Just say the word.” He didn’t want to tell her Emmy and Shania had hit a rock wall so far.
In all honesty, he wasn’t keen on having to deal with their crap again about Katie now that Mom had probably told them what was going on. They’d better not make a scene at the cookout Sunday.
“Thanks, but I need to get my head in the right space before Melissa arrives. It helps knowing she wanted to stay in touch with me, though. I’m not as reluctant to try and find her. Unfortunately, I didn’t see anything else in the letter that can help much.”
“Well, we know she was in Escondido at some point.”
She nodded, and they ate a few minutes in silence before she said, “How could Daddy keep those letters from me? I had every right to know…” Her voice broke, and he pushed his chair back and guided her by the hand onto his lap.
God, it felt good to hold her again, although he wished she wasn’t in such pain. “People do stupid things sometimes. Maybe he was afraid of losing you to your mom. Without a doubt, he had no clue how to parent.”
“I can’t believe I did the same thing as he did without even knowing he’d done that to me. I was so afraid of losing Chelsea that I selfishly kept her all to myself.”
Lots of people repeated what they knew. Travis would probably do the same, but fortunately he had great role models—two loving and supportive parents. Not that they didn’t kick his butt when he needed it and kicked their kids out of the nest when the time came.
“Perhaps, subconsciously, you knew all along he’d been responsible for her not returning. Could be you blocked out some scene that was too difficult for you to remember.”
She shrugged. “Hard to say.” He stroked her arm, loving that she hadn’t run from his affection this time. “I did find out that the name Chula wasn’t random after all. Mom called me that and sang me a song called “La Chula” as a lullaby at bedtime.”
“Wow. See? The mind sure is a powerful thing and who knows what other little tidbits it will release now that you know more of the truth.”
Her chin began to quiver, and she sniffled. He wrapped his arms around her and held her closer as her body trembled uncontrollably. Clearly, he wasn’t doing a very good job of taking her mind off the letter, but maybe she needed to talk about it.
“Reading the words in the letter was like hearing her voice and sitting with her again.”
Tires crunching on the gravel outside made Katie sit up.
“I’m glad you found it, Katie.”
She blinked a few times and stood up. He followed suit and brushed her hand away when she began clearing the dishes. “Anything you want me to work on this afternoon?”
“Nothing I can think of. I need to get ready for Melissa. She’s a little early. If you want to see if she needs any help getting Miss Pickles ready, I want to send an email to make sure everything’s set for the stallion I have on loan to arrive on schedule next week. I’ve fallen a little behind with everything that’s going on.”
She’d tamped down the emotions of a few minutes ago, but at least she’d leaned on him a little and shared some of what she was feeling, however briefly.
“I’ll take care of things in the barn,” he said. “We can talk later about whether there’s anything you need to work on before the stallion shows up. In the meantime, I’ll also head up to the old barn and bring down more hay and straw. You have my phone number if you need anything. I can get a signal up there.” He stood and picked up their empty plates and bowls. “Hey, why don’t I pick up some pizzas and rent a movie or something for tonight? Have you seen The Longest Ride?”
Katie shook her head. “Saw the previews, but most movies are long gone from the theaters by the time I see them. That’s why my DVD collection is so extensive. It looked good, provided it has a happy ending. I don’t think I need a sad Nicholas Sparks movie tonight.”
Travis chuckled. “My sisters loved it. I think they have the hots for Scott Eastwood, though. I’ll check with one of them to make sure it ends on a high note.” It would give him a chance to tell them about the letter, even though he didn’t have much more information to share.
“Great,” Katie said as she crossed the room toward the hallway. “Chelsea only likes plain cheese pizza, so get two and make ours something more interesting.”
“Sausage, onions, mushrooms, and…” He couldn’t resist. “…green olives?”
She pivoted and glared at him before breaking out in a smile. “Busted. I thought I was going to die when you caught me about to toss a handful of those disgusting things over my shoulder and I was forced to eat them.” She shuddered, but continued to grin. At least he’d lightened her mood. “Chelsea loves them. Which reminds me, you could put green olives on her cheese pizza, since I don’t have any here. I need to get some more.”
“I’ll put it on the list for the next trip to the store.” He tapped his temple since he played a game with being able to memorize his grocery list. Kept his mind sharp.
“I’ll hold the popcorn bowl between you two.” God, that sounded a lot hokier than he’d intended, but Katie smiled wider as she shook her head, making it worth a moment of embarrassment.
On his way out to the barn to greet Melissa, Travis couldn’t wait for tonight to come. Maybe it would take Katie’s mind off both the lett
er and Sunday’s visit with his family.
Only thing that would make the evening better would be if they could be together as a family like this permanently, not just during his quasi-vacation. Of course, he couldn’t stay away from his business forever, even if Jackson was doing a great job of running the place without him.
Already the tug of war between his two greatest responsibilities had begun. He was going to have to come to some decisions about the future—and soon. But not until after the meeting with his family.
He had no doubts that Chelsea would be accepted by them. Katie, on the other hand…well, that might be a different story. Oh, his parents would be welcoming, but he was worried about Emmy. She’d taken it particularly hard when Katie had dumped him. She tended to be fierce in her loyalty and protectiveness for family and had come to her older brother’s defense on more than one occasion.
He’d set the tone for Sunday, which would probably mean making a few more phone calls before they showed up on his parents’ doorstep. Travis didn’t like leaving anything to chance.
Chapter Twenty-Six
“I’ve sure made a mess of things,” Ben muttered to himself as he watched Kate walk down the hallway toward her office. Instead of going in, she went upstairs, her shoulders sagging under the weight of the day’s revelations, he supposed. In her bedroom, she retrieved the letter from her mother again, holding the envelope up to her face as she breathed deeply, eyes closed.
Then she took the paper out of the envelope and her phone from her pocket. Was she going to call the number now? Hell, it probably wasn’t in use any longer, but he wished Kate would at least give it a try. Knowing she was ready to reconnect with Gail would help him convince Gail to reach out.
She checked the number at the end of the message and punched it into her phone then pocketed the phone again.
Ben felt deflated after getting his hopes up. What was Kate afraid of? Gail, too, for that matter? That letter confirmed that her mother still loved her. Wanted to be a part of her life. What more did she need?
“It’s been twenty-two years, man. Cut ’em some slack.”
Ben turned to see that Danny had joined him. How much had he witnessed of the goings-on in here today? Did he know about the letter?
“At least you managed to get the letter in front of her.”
Apparently so.
“But you sure were a piece of work, Ben. That was one of the most contemptible things I’ve ever seen anyone do to a loved one—and I’ve seen plenty, believe you me.”
“You don’t have to kick me. I’m already down.”
“Well, just pick your ass back up because your mission won’t be completed until those two reunite. How much time do you think we have left before…?”
Ben shrugged, but appreciated the we in Danny’s question. He wasn’t sure he could fix this mess on his own anymore. “Obadiah isn’t letting on but reminds me every time I see him that I can’t pussyfoot around.”
“Sure doesn’t sound good.” Danny acknowledged.
Returning his focus to his daughter, he watched Kate pluck a tissue from the box on the dresser, dab at her eyes, and blow her nose.
“I’m afraid she’s going to bury her feelings around Travis and Chelsea and pretend her world hasn’t just collapsed. That’s always been her method of functioning in the past.”
“Gee, wonder where she got that from?”
Ben gave it some thought. “You’re probably right. I taught her that, too.”
“Why do you suppose you did that?”
Ben had never been one to analyze things in life, but the afterlife was all about going over what he’d done while incarnate and figuring out how to move his soul forward on its path. “Probably had to do with my own parents deserting me as a kid. My grandparents took me in on this very farm,” he said, waving his arm to indicate the place, “and loved me as much as anyone could. I was eight. Spent a few nights in foster care before my grandparents could come to Cincinnati to get me. But growing up, I always felt like I had to toe the line and keep my emotions under control for fear I’d drive them away, too.”
“What makes you think you were responsible for your parents abandoning you? Maybe they were just selfish bastards or clueless about how to raise a kid.”
“Well, we’ve reconnected on this side to hash out some of those issues. They’ve apologized, swearing it wasn’t anything I’d done. But how do you convince a little kid of that?”
Danny nodded. “Yeah. We have our own skewed way of looking at things at that age. You think Katie blames herself for her mom leaving?”
“I think so. At least, she did until she found that letter. Maybe things will get better now that she knows it wasn’t her doing that kept her mom away, but mine.”
“You’re fighting on two fronts, you know. Besides her mom, you also messed with Katie’s relationship with Travis. I hope to hell you can see how wrong you were about his ability to be an excellent husband and father.”
“Now, wait a minute. I only did what Kate told me to do. She said, ‘Send him away if he shows up. Don’t tell him where I am.’ I just followed her wishes.”
“But you helped convince her that if she told him, he’d eventually resent being tied down, didn’t you?”
“Oh, yeah, I guess I did.” Was there no end to the lives he’d messed up? “I never saw how good they were together even before the split.” The man sure did take awful good care of her now from what Ben could see. Looks like Ben had been wrong about him all along.
Kate laid the letter down again, and this time she did go into the office to send an email before heading out to the arena for an afternoon of lessons. Ben and Danny hung around the house. He just didn’t want to see the hurt on his little girl’s face anymore.
Something triggered his argumentative side. “If Travis is so into having a relationship again, when in tarnation is he going to make an honest woman out of Kate?” Ben wasn’t sure yet that he’d be the man for her, but she’d obviously never shown any interest in anyone else in all these years.
“What are you—blind or merely oblivious? The man’s been shot down once by her. Maybe he’s a little gun-shy, although I get the feeling something big happened between them last night while I was in a session with my spirit guide. He’s got a spring in his step I haven’t seen in a while.”
There certainly hadn’t been a bounce in his daughter’s step when he’d seen her earlier.
“Maybe I’ve been wrong all this time about Travis and Katie.” Danny said.
“How so?”
“I’m beginning to think she’s a mite bitter and distrustful for someone as saintly as Travis to be saddled with.”
“Now, wait a minute, there!” Ben would have knocked the younger spirit on his ass if Danny had one. “They don’t come any better than Kate. She wasn’t always like this, you know. It’s my own fault she goes around not trusting anyone with walls around her heart.”
“She could change if she wanted to. She still has free will. If I can overcome the shortfalls of my upbringing, she can, too.”
Ben wondered what he’d been through, but before he could ask, Danny continued. “Yeah, if he’d listen to me, I’d tell Travis to cut bait and run. Not from Chelsea, of course. He’s never going to turn his back on his daughter.” Ben seethed, but Danny wasn’t finished yet. “When’s Travis gonna see that Katie doesn’t have the capacity to love him the way he deserves to be loved? Not if she keeps running away from him whenever he gets too close.”
“Enough already! My Kate’s never been good at dealing with messy things like emotions, thanks to me. Stop blaming her. Sure, she’s running scared right now with so much on her plate—integrating Travis into their lives, deciding whether she wants to find her mother, and facing Travis’s family on Sunday.” Ben stood down. “Damn it, the only thing I can see that will break down her walls is for her to reunite with her mother. Somehow, Gail holds the key here. She’ll need someone strong like Travis with her to face
her fears.” He couldn’t believe he’d just admitted that she needed Travis Cooper.
Danny grinned and winked. “Then what are you standing here jawing with me for?”
Had Danny been provoking him into action and to get him to sanction Kate and Travis being together? Maybe Ben needed to visit Gail again. Before he could act, Kate surprised him when she entered the kitchen. He had no concept of time, but it was still afternoon judging by the light. “I thought she told Travis she had Melissa booked for lessons all afternoon.”
“Maybe they’re taking a break.”
Before he could speculate further, Kate pulled her phone out of her pocket and sat down at the table staring at it. At last, she punched the green button to connect a call. Immediately after, she hit the red one to cancel the call before it could have gone through.
“Dammit, Kate! Stop torturing yourself and me like this!” He swatted at and knocked the basket of mail to the floor. Wow. That was a lot easier than anything else he’d tried to move from this side.
Kate stared at it a moment, glanced around, and then picked it up and placed it back on the counter before squaring her shoulders and attempting the call again. This time, she didn’t end it before it had begun. Ben held his breath. She had a white-knuckled death grip on the phone.
Instead of a ringtone, though, the screeching sound of a disconnected phone number blared in the air.
“Crap,” Danny said.
“I figured as much.”
When Kate buried her head in her arms as the sound of her sobbing filled the room, Ben’s heart broke—again. “That settles it. See you later.”
In a flash, he was back in Gail’s house. Without preamble, he said, “You need to call Kate.”
She paused in brushing her teeth and turned toward where he hovered nearby. “I told you, she doesn’t need me in her life anymore.”
“Like hell she doesn’t. Right now, she’s back in Kentucky crying her eyes out because she finally found that letter you wrote for her twelfth birthday.”
Kate's Secret (Bluegrass Spirits Book 2) Page 30
