Spirit of the Wolves

by Dorothy Hearst

  “Now do you believe us?” he said. “Now do you see what the humans do when they fear us?”

  He expected me to apologize. In some ways, I was sorry. I’d made mistakes with the humans, and that was one of the reasons they’d burned the woods. But the time for apologies had passed.

  “We have a plan,” I said.

  My mother interrupted me. “Let her go. Let her take her humans and go. I will make sure they stay away from the humans.”

  “I’m not leaving,” I said, and Yildra snarled.

  “It’s too late for that, Neesa, you know that,” Yildra said. “They have failed in everything they have tried, as has every wolf before them.”

  A distant Greatwolf howl sounded across the land. The rest of the Sentinel wolves were on their way. We were running out of time.

  “Now we know more than we did before,” I said, “and you need to know it, too.” Neesa whuffed a warning.

  “I think they need to meet the Shadow Wolf,” I told her.

  “But they can’t!” she said.

  “They can,” I said. At least I hope so, I added to myself. I didn’t know what I’d do if Tlitoo couldn’t really take them with us to the Inejalun.

  “What is she talking about?” Navdru growled.

  “Milsindra was right,” I told him. “There is a place between the worlds, and Tlitoo can take me there. He can take other wolves with us, too.” I paused, gathering courage for what I said next. “I am the drelwolf.” I pointed my muzzle at Tlitoo. “We are the Nejakilakin.”

  I had never said it aloud before, never even admitted it to myself that I could be a wolf of legend. But whether I wanted it to be true or not, it was clear that my actions might very well determine the fate of wolfkind, and I had to have the courage to acknowledge it.

  Tlitoo glided down to land next to me. “One of you at a time may come with us. You cannot stay long. The Inejalun is not a place for living beings. You will grow cold, and if you stay too long, you will die. If the drelwolf stays too long with each of you, she will not survive.”

  He hopped up on Navdru’s back and quorked a challenge. Navdru began to back away, snarling. Before he could give the order to kill me, I jumped, slamming into the Sentinel leader. Tlitoo put one foot on my back and one on Navdru’s.

  Then we were falling. The last thing I heard was Navdru’s gasp of terror before all scent and sound deserted me. A few dizzying moments later, we stood in the Stone Circle.

  “It worked!” Tlitoo screeched. “It worked, wolflet!” He ran his beak through my backfur.

  “What is this place?” Navdru’s voice shook so much I almost didn’t recognize it. His eyes were wide in shock. “I know the Stone Circle of the Wide Valley, but this can’t really be it.” He took a shuddering breath. “I can’t feel my paws.”

  “It’s just the cold of the Inejalun,” I said. I’d forgotten how terrified I’d been when I first came to this place.

  “There is no time to blather, wolves,” Tlitoo reminded us. He stalked to the edge of the Stone Circle.

  “Take me out of here,” Navdru demanded, crouching down as if to avoid an attack from above.

  “I will not,” retorted Tlitoo. “I will leave you here to freeze and die alone if you do not come with us. You promised to watch over all of wolfkind. Are you too afraid to do so?”

  Navdru straightened, and lifted his head. “I will do whatever I must for wolfkind.”

  We walked through the Inejalun, stopping to show Navdru the village full of streckwolves that had stood in the land that was now the Barrens. We let him see how relaxed and happy the humans were with the little wolves. He growled when he saw them. Then we took him to the Shadow Wolf’s cave. Navdru stopped at the entrance, refusing to go in.

  “I’ve been here before,” he said, his voice full of dread, “in the real world. The wolf who lives here is said to speak for the Ancients. I came here with my pack when I was no more than a pup.”

  I wondered how long ago that was. Greatwolves lived a very long time.

  The Shadow Wolf loomed over us and Navdru backed away. Tlitoo bit his tail, making him stumble forward.

  “The Greatwolves have not fulfilled the Promise of wolfkind,” the Shadow Wolf said, stepping over the wolf bones that littered the bottom of the cave. He was larger than I remembered, and moved with grace and ease. “You left it to this youngwolf.” He inclined his head to me, then lifted a shadow lip to Navdru. “Now you must make it up to her. You must take your wolves and leave the humans’ new companions be.” His muzzle tightened in distaste. “You must let the streckwolves be. You and your pack are not to kill any of them. You are to take yourselves away and give the humans to Gaanin and his children, for the Greatwolves’ time is nearly done.”

  Navdru sneezed and tried to answer through frozen lips. Tlitoo didn’t give him the chance. The next thing I knew, we were back by the Hill Rock with the Sentinel wolves staring at us.

  Navdru was trembling.

  “What did you see?” Yildra demanded. Navdru shook his head. “You won’t believe me. You must see for yourself. But I think we have been wrong.”

  I was so tired I had to swallow a whimper, but if taking Yildra to the Inejalun convinced her to spare our lives and those of the streckwolves, I would make the journey a thousand times over. Yildra stepped forward, quaking just a little.

  I staggered to meet her. TaLi blocked my way.

  “What’s wrong, Kaala?” she asked, looking down at me in concern. I was so tired I was weaving and stumbling. I licked her hand and shoved her gently aside.

  Yildra stayed silent when I took her first to watch the streckwolves and then to the Shadow Wolf. My paws, tail, and nose, already cold from when I had taken Navdru, had not warmed when I returned to the world of life. By the time we reached the Shadow Wolf’s cave, my muzzle, legs, and face were frozen, too. When we returned to the Hill Rock, I found that I’d tumbled over onto my side and was gasping for breath.

  “That’s enough,” Neesa said, worry making her voice ragged. But the other Greatwolves were watching us expectantly.

  “It is too important a decision to make if we are not sure,” a pale-coated female rumbled. “We must be certain.”

  “We have to keep going,” I said to Tlitoo.

  “You can’t show every Greatwolf in the pack,” Ázzuen snarled. He lowered his head as if planning to attack the surrounding Greatwolves.

  “It is too much, wolf,” Tlitoo quorked. “You have never spent this much time in the cold place.” I blinked up at him and he hunched his head down between his wings. “If I take you there again, it must be the last time for many days. It will not be safe to return. Even going once more is very risky. I do not want to lose you, stupid little wolf.”

  I was the one who had led the Sentinels to the grassless plain. It was my fault Gaanin was ready to leave, and if the Greatwolves didn’t agree to let the streckwolves live, we would fail.

  “We have to get them to leave the streckwolves alone,” I whispered.

  “All right, wolf,” Tlitoo said. Ázzuen growled softly. Tlitoo spread his wings and rasped at the Sentinel wolves.

  “We will show one more of you, and that is all,” he said. The female who had spoken stepped forward. I tried to stagger to her, but could not. She came to me, leaning against me almost gently. TaLi came, too, and this time I did not have the strength to shove her away.

  Tlitoo moved so quickly from the Stone Circle to the streckwolf village and to the Shadow Wolf’s cave that I could barely keep up.

  “Slow down!” I gasped, my throat aching.

  “There is not time, wolflet. You have been here too long already.”

  I knew he was right. Already, I could not feel anything but my chest and belly. Everything else was so cold. My heart was beating too slowly, and I couldn’t fill my lungs. By the time we had shown the Greatwolf the Shadow Wolf’s cave, only my chest remained warm.

  Then, just as Tlitoo was about to yank us from the Inejalu
n, I saw TaLi sitting on one of the rocks in the Stone Circle. She must have leaned up against me, and somehow been dragged into the Inejalun.

  “Kaala?” she whispered.

  “You can’t be here,” I said urgently through a muzzle that barely moved.

  “Why not?” she asked. “You’re here.”

  In the moment it took me to realize that she had understood me, Tlitoo yanked us from the Inejalun. Then we were all back at the Hill Rock. Tlitoo quorked curiously at TaLi but all I could do was lie on the ground, panting.

  I tried to talk to the Sentinels, to explain why they must leave the streckwolves alone, but four journeys to the Inejalun had wearied me too much. I toppled onto my side and into unconsciousness.

  It seemed only moments later that Tlitoo poked me awake. I rolled over with a groan. The Sentinels had left. Neesa remained. Ázzuen was lying next to me, his strong, solid body warming me while Pell and Marra stood guard. TaLi and BreLan squatted on their heels, waiting. I was still so tired I couldn’t move. I looked up to see the sun high overhead and wondered what day it was, and if we were too late to meet the streckwolves.

  Neesa lowered her nose to mine.

  “They have agreed, Kaala. We will give the humans to the streckwolves and leave the streckwolves unharmed.”

  “We woke you in time to get to them, wolf,” Tlitoo said. He sounded worried.

  “The Sentinels agreed?”

  I couldn’t believe it. We hadn’t failed yet. We might even have won. Only hours ago, I’d thought the Promise broken and everyone I loved at risk. Now we might all live. I might be able to be with TaLi and Ázzuen after all. Stream Lands was lost to me, burned in the humans’ fire, but a pack with Ázzuen and TaLi was not. Following the streckwolves to the humans was not. I wanted to leap to my paws to celebrate but was too exhausted to do more than lick Neesa’s muzzle in thanks.

  “I waited for you to wake up,” she said, “but it’s time for me to follow the others. Navdru and Yildra insist that I go with them so I do not breed with a streckwolf again, and create another wolf such as you.” She grinned at me. “They find both of us troublesome.” She licked my ears. “Will you come with us? Navdru has said that you will have a home with the Sentinel pack, and the others have agreed. I would like to have more time with you.”

  I’d dreamed of being in a pack with my mother since the day she left me. For just an instant I allowed myself to imagine it: running every hunt with her, sleeping in the warm sun beside her while Ázzuen’s and my pups played. But the Sentinels would never allow our humans in their pack.

  “I need to stay with TaLi,” I mumbled through a stiff muzzle. I’d clenched it so hard against the cold of the Inejalun that the muscles had seized up. I wouldn’t give TaLi up, even to go with my mother. Neesa looked disappointed but not surprised. She lay her head over my neck and pulled me close to her.

  “Find me again when you can,” she said. “I hope that we will be within a few days’ run of these lands. I have no intention of losing you again.” She licked me between the ears once more, then loped away, following the Sentinels’ trail toward the distant hills. I watched her go. I’d thought once I found my mother, I would stay with her forever. Now she was leaving me again. I swallowed my whimper. This time, the choice was mine.

  My packmates watched me silently. It was Marra who finally spoke.

  “We’re leaving, too, Kaala. We’re going back to the Wide Valley,” she said. “We need to tell the Greatwolf council what the Sentinels have agreed to. And MikLan is there. We’ll come back with him if you’re going to settle here with your humans.”

  “We are,” I said. Of course we were. “We’ll stay near Laan until the streckwolves get the villagers comfortable enough that we can try to get them to accept us. If we can.”

  “You will, Kaala,” Pell said. “Marra and I will be proud to be part of your pack.”

  Marra and Pell nosed my face and Ázzuen’s neck, then galloped back toward the mountains and the Wide Valley.

  My eyes drooped, luring me back toward sleep. I forced them open. Gaanin would be waiting for us. I stood and stretched the aches from my stiff muscles.

  I tried to move quickly, but Ázzuen, BreLan, and even TaLi with her hurt ankle had to keep waiting for me as I stumbled along. I hadn’t slept long enough after my journeys to the Inejalun, and I couldn’t force my body to move any faster. Finally, BreLan lifted me in his arms and carried me. The humans kept talking about what they would say when they got to Laan. We would have to find a way to lead them away from it, as we had led them from the valley.

  I was grateful to BreLan for carrying me. I licked his face and laid my head against his shoulder.

  The streckwolves were waiting for us in front of the woods that led to Laan. Our humans watched the streckwolves curiously, but without fear.

  I wriggled in BreLan’s arms. He set me down, and I staggered to the streckwolves. Ázzuen walked protectively at my side. The two humans sat back on their haunches, watching the streckwolves curiously.

  “The Sentinels have agreed,” I said to Gaanin.

  “And you believe them?”

  “I do,” I said.

  His muzzle tightened. “That will have to be good enough.”

  “Let’s go to the humans,” I said. I was still cold. All I wanted to do was sleep, but the sooner we got the streckwolves to the humans, the better.

  Gaanin looked at me, an apology in his gaze. His voice, however, was firm.

  “You can’t go near them, Kaala. Neither of you can.” He jutted his chin at Ázzuen.

  “What do you mean?”

  “You have too much of the wild in you, remember?” he said. “That’s why they burned the forests. You have to leave with the others. Your kind must stay away from the humans from now on, like the Greatwolves. The task of keeping the humans part of the world around them is ours now.”

  A growl throbbed in my throat. “You said that you wanted the humans to learn to be with other creatures besides you and your pack. You told me that you hoped that if they were able to love you streckwolves, they would learn to love the world around them.”

  “I meant what I said. But it cannot be in my lifetime or yours. I’m sorry, Kaala.”

  He had deliberately misled me. My growl deepened. Tlitoo hissed at the streckwolf.

  “What about the Barrens?” Ázzuen demanded. “If the humans have only wolves that aren’t wild, they’ll create more Barrens.”

  “They will,” Gaanin said. “It’s too late, much too late, for us to be able to get the humans to accept wildness in its true form. We must go more gently. In the meantime, they will create more Barrens. They will take over more forest and destroy it. Someday, if the humans can accept the bit of the wild that will remain in our children’s children, they might indeed learn to accept the greater wild. We have to hope they do so before the world becomes a Barrens.”

  I wouldn’t do it. There was no way I’d leave, not after everything I’d done. I was the one who had brought the wolves and humans together. I had faced Greatwolves who were ready to kill me and brought them to a world between life and death. I had let packmates die.

  I met Gaanin’s eyes and saw the challenge in them. He had lost packmates to the Promise, too.

  “Tell me, Kaala, will you be like the others?” he asked. “Like the ancient Greatwolves who shirked their responsibility? Like Milsindra, grasping for power and her own gain? Because if so, you are no pup of mine. I will take my pack and leave.”

  The Greatwolves had failed and failed again because of their pride and selfishness. The streckwolves had come closest to succeeding because they were unselfish and willing to do anything to gain the humans’ trust. Whitefur and Short Tail had assumed that their only task in the world was to give humans love, and the humans on the grassless plain had been happier than any I’d ever seen.

  I had known. I knew that the streckwolves were better for the humans than we were the first time Tlitoo showed them to me.
When I saw them in the Inejalun and on the grassless plain my fury had been born of envy. The streckwolves seemed to change the humans into a different kind of creature. Less wary and more open to love. I had known that it had to be them.

  Prannan and Amma had died for the Promise. So had many others. If I refused to let the streckwolves have the humans, knowing they were more likely to succeed than I, then I was no better than a Greatwolf. And if I had to choose between being like Milsindra or like the little not-wolves, I would rather be a streckwolf.

  I remembered the vow I’d made to the Shadow Wolf. He had known I would come to such a choice.

  “We’ll take our humans somewhere far away,” I said at last, my throat tight with regret. At least we could keep our humans with us.

  Ázzuen was watching Gaanin with narrowed eyes.

  “You still need us,” he said, speaking quickly as he did when he was figuring something out. “The Sentinels were right about that. We have to preserve the wild so that when humans realize they need it, it will be there for them.”

  Gaanin dipped his head. “Yes. The Greatwolves’ time is done. You and your children must keep the wildness of the wolf. If after accepting us the humans can stop killing your kind and other creatures of the wild, there is hope. But there must be those left who remember the Promise. You must help with another task, as well.” He looked at TaLi where she squatted next to BreLan. “The other krianans are dead,” Gaanin said. “As the wolves must keep wildness in trust for the humans, your girl must keep the knowledge of it for future krianans. She must pass along the understanding of the importance of the wild to her children, and their children’s children. Wherever you take her, you must make sure she does so.”

  That made me remember DavRian’s lies about TaLi and RalZun.

  “Did you go to Laan?” I asked, beginning to shake from fatigue. I had been standing for too long. “Do they believe DavRian about our krianans? Are TaLi and BreLan safe staying nearby?”

  “They are not,” a female streckwolf said. “I heard the humans of Laan say that the old krianans are as dangerous as wolves. They will kill your girl and her mate if they find them.”