Forever Hidden

by Tracie Peterson

  Judas picked up several sheets of paper off his desk. “This is the shipping schedule. Looks like the next boat to Seattle is in a week.”

  “Will you help me, sir? With the loan?” He didn’t want to beg, but at this point, he would do just about anything.

  “I’m sorry, John, I didn’t realize I hadn’t answered you. Of course I’ll help. Just go to the ticketing office and tell them to send the bill here. I’ll take care of it.”

  “Thank you. Is there perhaps some work I could do around here to help repay the loan? It would have to be late at night, after I’m done at the farm, but I don’t mind.”

  Mr. Reynolds rubbed his chin. “You know, now that I think about it, I could use a man to sort inventory in the warehouse to get it ready for the next day. You could do that after you’re done at the farm.”

  “I’ll do it. Thank you. I could even drop the ladies off at the Roadhouse and work while they are there. Then I can return and finish at the farm later.” John stuck out his hand and Judas shook it. “I’ll start tonight if you’d like.”

  “I’ll get my foreman on it and he’ll leave you a list of things to do.”

  His heart a bit lighter, John left the shipping company. It wouldn’t be great news to have to share with the Powells, but at least there was a plan in place.

  And, if it came to it, he could go without sleep for a few days. Even if he could just get an hour here and there, he’d probably be fine.

  He’d sacrifice everything for this family he’d come to love.

  Twenty-Five

  A knock on the door startled Geoffrey. Not another late-night emergency. Taking care of drunks that had beaten each other up during a brawl was getting old. Maybe he should start sending them away.

  As he stood to answer the door, his conscience got the better of him. If he wanted to be known as the good doctor in town, then he’d have to treat everyone. All the time.

  With a sigh, he opened the door.

  Havyn Powell entered, her sister Whitney right behind her. “Dr. Kingston, I wasn’t going to say anything to you, but I want you to look at this.” She threw down two packages of asthmatic cigarettes. One the real one he’d left with them when Mrs. Powell was struggling to breathe. The other—a fake.

  “Is there something wrong?” He put on his best quizzical look.

  If he thought the fire in Havyn’s voice was burning, he wasn’t prepared for the older sister’s scorch. “One of these is not medicine, Doctor.” Hands on her hips, she looked ready to do war.

  Havyn took another step closer. “Why do these smell different? Did you not notice the misspelling on the packaging? What about all the medication for Granddad? Is it fake too? Are you cheating us?”

  Geoffrey peered over their shoulders.

  Judas Reynolds now stood in the doorway. A deep scowl on his face. “Miss Powell, is there a problem?”

  The sisters turned and started talking over one another to Judas.

  He held up a hand. “Is this true, Dr. Kingston?”

  The sisters looked over their shoulders at him.

  “I . . . uh . . .”

  Judas let out a lengthy sigh. Rubbing his forehead, he tsked. “Ladies, as a dear friend of your family, I am appalled at what has happened to you. Rest assured that I will get to the bottom of this. And I will ensure that you are refunded your money.” He leveled a narrowed gaze at Geoffrey.

  He could almost feel the weight pressing down on him.

  “And you, sir. If you have done anything inappropriate in any way, I will have your license revoked and have you thrown in jail. Do I make myself clear?”

  Geoffrey nodded.

  Judas escorted the two ladies out the door.

  Several moments later, he returned, slamming the door after he entered. “Are you out of your mind? Why on earth did they have a fake package and a real one?”

  He stumbled over his words. “I . . . I don’t know.”

  Judas marched over to the desk and leaned over it. His face was inches from Geoffrey’s. “Let’s get one thing clear. You will figure out a way to explain this little mix-up without a mention of my name, or I will see to it that you are exposed for the fraud that you are, Herbert. And if you make one more mistake, we’re done. Which means—you’re done.”

  The chickens chattered and followed Havyn around like little puppy dogs. All the new chickens were finally in the group with the others. And so far, so good. There’d been a few little hen-pecking fights. But for the most part, they all got along. There was enough space for all of them, so that helped.

  No matter how much she tried to sing to them or carry on a conversation with her girls, it wouldn’t come. Too much weight seemed to be on her shoulders.

  What if Mama died? She’d been their anchor for so long. What would they do without her?

  Regret pulsed through her. How many times had she missed an opportunity to hug her mother? Or to tell her that she appreciated her? They were together every day, and yet Havyn felt like she’d taken her mother for granted. Why was it that she realized how much someone meant to her when the thought of them leaving overwhelmed her?

  She’d been pouring her heart out in prayer for weeks, but God seemed silent. If only she could do something to change their circumstances, but it was out of her hands. Besides, God was Almighty God. He could handle this.

  But could she?

  The verse from Philippians came back to mind: “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” How many times had she thought of that verse when she faced something difficult? And prayed for some superhuman power or to be able to accomplish something ridiculous. After Pastor Wilson’s sermon on it, it made so much more sense. No matter what circumstances she faced, she could be content. Christ would help her.

  In fact, at this very moment, she was wandering around the chicken yard melancholy and full of worry. Okay, God. I think I’m finally getting the point. I need to be content. And knowing that I can do all things through Christ, who strengtheneth me, I’m calling on that help so that I can be content. I want to be able to rejoice always. I can’t do it on my own. But You can do it through me.

  Peace filled her heart and mind. And when she looked down, she could smile at her hens. There was much to rejoice about. The farm was doing well. John had expanded their milk, butter, and cream production. Then he’d added the cheese making. She had no idea how it was all getting done, but there were lots of orders coming in. Was he making cheese in the middle of the night? Did he have anyone helping him?

  Once again, her thoughts overwhelmed her.

  Stop it. Be content. Rejoice.

  She took a deep breath. Amazing how easy it was to go right back to a worry-filled frame of mind.

  She turned her thoughts back to her family. Granddad was finally improving, but he was so frustrated that he couldn’t communicate with them. Hopefully soon he’d be able to hold a pencil again, but at least he could move his left arm and leg.

  They had the opportunity to play music every night—that was a big reason to rejoice. God had given her the gift of music and she wanted to use it for His glory.

  Movement in the next field caught her attention. John was herding some of the new calves.

  John.

  Just the thought of him brought cheer to her heart. He’d been so wonderful and supportive. Helpful in every aspect of life. And now he was working extra for Judas so that they could pay passage for Mama and Madysen to get to the hospital in Seattle.

  Love swelled in her heart for the man.

  Love.

  Was that really what this was?

  They hadn’t courted. Hadn’t done anything but work together and share the daily life on the farm. But he already had her heart. And he probably didn’t even know it. That was what was so special about it. He sacrificed of himself day in and day out, never asking for anything in return. It proved to her that he’d signed that contract for the best interest of her family. And if he chose her, then she would be pro
ud and thankful.

  As her feelings swelled within, a spontaneous thought came to mind.

  She set the feed bucket down and left the chicken yard. With determined steps, she made her way over to the next field, opened the gate, and walked through it. After she’d latched it back, she took a deep breath and strode over to John.

  It didn’t matter that they hadn’t fallen in love the normal way. It didn’t matter that he hadn’t asked to court her.

  What mattered was that she was about to tell the man she loved exactly how she felt.

  Judas sat in his chair and watched the doctor fidget in front of him. What a fool.

  “I don’t know what to do to fix this situation, Mr. Reynolds. I’ve been wracking my brain for ideas, but nothing sounds believable. You have to admit, this is partially your fault—”

  He came out of his chair. “Excuse me? You’re the one who gave both boxes to a patient.”

  Kingston shriveled in front of him. “What’s the big deal? I’m new here. But they trust you. . . . Can’t you tell them it was some sort of mistake? That you contacted the manufacturer since you’re the one who orders everything?”

  Judas put a hand to his brow. This guy had a lot to learn if he was going to survive here.

  “That way you can be the hero, and I can look ignorant of anything being amiss.”

  Well, that was not a bad idea. He paced behind his desk, then set his palms on the desk in front of him. “I’ll let you off this once, but let this be a learning experience. I’ll handle the family.”

  “Thank you, sir.” Kingston headed for the door and then turned around. “I noticed you’ve been helping out that family a great deal.”

  “And?”

  “Well, it just made me curious . . . that’s all.”

  Little rat. Judas knew that game. The man was trying to find an edge somewhere. “There’s nothing to be curious about. I’m a businessman. I help people out, they owe me. Simple as that.”

  “Right.” Kingston looked at him for a moment and then shrugged. “Well, I guess I’ll be going.” He reached for the doorknob.

  “Don’t let it happen again, Doctor.” Judas straightened his vest and took his seat again.

  The man gave a slight nod, opened the door, and left.

  Several moments passed as Judas thought through the quandary. On one hand, having the doctor here was good for business. Especially since he had so much to hold over the man’s head. On the other hand, Kingston could be a liability—even possibly a threat to Judas’s cover.

  So far, no one knew what he was up to. He wanted to keep it that way.

  Tapping the desk, he weighed all the options. Should he allow the doctor to stay . . .

  Or get rid of him?

  Twenty-Six

  A light breeze blew across Havyn’s face, and several locks of hair escaped her braid. She took a deep breath and smoothed her apron as she headed toward John.

  Her heart fluttered and she couldn’t help but smile as she got closer. This was not like the love she’d read about in books. It hadn’t been some grand romance, or love at first sight. It wasn’t like what she’d seen from Mama and Dad. This was . . . what was it?

  It was real. Exciting, yes, but more of a warm, cozy feeling. Like she belonged. Even though they hadn’t shared how they felt about one another, she knew. Deep down. Even after all the doubt.

  And she couldn’t wait to see what God did through it.

  She thought about what she would say. And she went blank. How did she tell him that she loved him? Especially when there had been no foundation prior to this point. Well, none except for a good friendship and shared responsibilities.

  The wail of a cow made her frown.

  John rushed over to the animal. Havyn lifted her skirts and ran toward him. The sound was horrific.

  The cow lay down, and John knelt beside it.

  She slowed her steps and tried to walk up quietly so she wouldn’t spook the animal and cause it to kick John. “Do you know what’s wrong? Can I help?”

  He rubbed the side of the cow. “I don’t know. She just started wailing and then went down.”

  “She looks bloated.” Havyn knelt and ran her hand down the full length of the cow. “John, I think she’s calving. Look at the way her body is heaving.”

  John shook his head. “She wasn’t one of them on the list. I thought we’d had all we were going to have for a while. She’s a young one, so this is her first.” John rubbed his chin. “Stay with her. I’m going to get a rope and see if we can’t take her into the calving shed. That way we won’t have to deal with any of the rest of the herd.”

  Several of the cows had already gotten closer. Probably because of the wailing.

  John rubbed the muzzles of a couple of cows, then headed to the barn. While he was gone, Havyn started to sing to the cow. In a soft, hopefully soothing voice.

  John returned. “What’s that?”

  “It’s a German song.” She continued it as John slipped the rope over the cow’s head. “‘Ich selber kann und mag nicht ruhn, des großen Gottes großes Tun, erweckt mir alle Sinnen. Ich singe mit, wenn alles singt, und lasse, was dem Höchsten klingt, aus meinem Herzen rinnen.’”

  John and Havyn coaxed the cow to stand and together led her to the birthing shed. John tied the cow to one end of the pen. “It’s a beautiful song. What does it mean?”

  Havyn thought for a moment. “If I remember correctly, it describes not being able to be still because of God’s great works. The singer joins with everything, singing and praising God from the heart.” She smiled. “For some reason, the song comforts the animals.”

  “I can see why, especially when you sing it.” He looked at her. “I know it comforts me.”

  Their gazes locked, and Havyn’s heart pounded. Was it . . . did she see love in his eyes?

  The cow gave a pitiful sound and broke the spell. John checked the animal. “Sure enough, looks like she’s about to give birth.” He moved to the back and arranged things.

  “We’ll call the baby Surprise.” Havyn couldn’t help laughing.

  “We don’t name the calves like you name chickens.” John shook his head. “We don’t have time.”

  “I think everything deserves a name.” Havyn went to the cow’s head and rubbed her between the ears. “Like this cow looks like an Esmeralda.”

  John chuckled. “Really? I knew an Esmeralda once, and she looked nothing like this cow.” John lined up some ropes. “Your grandfather showed me how to pull the calf if I have to, but I might need your help.”

  “All right. I’m ready. Was she pretty?”

  “Who?” He frowned and glanced back over his shoulder at Havyn.

  “Your Esmeralda.” Havyn tried not to sound jealous, but she felt that way.

  “She wasn’t my Esmeralda, but yes. She was very pretty. Beautiful blond hair and blue eyes.”

  What if John preferred blondes with blue eyes? Havyn bit her lip.

  The cow’s sides heaved, and this time tiny hooves emerged from the birthing canal. John smiled and stepped back. “Well, she may be new at this, but it looks like she’s getting it done right.”

  “Can I do anything to help you?”

  “Not at the moment. But if I have to pull the calf, I’ll need you. I haven’t had to do it since I first arrived, so I hope I get it right.”

  “I helped Granddad many times with pulling calves. We’ll do it together.” Havyn stepped up. “I think we’ll make a good team.”

  He paused and looked at her for a moment, then grinned. “I think we make a great team.”

  An hour later, Havyn couldn’t have agreed more. Sure enough, the calf had gotten stuck. But they’d done it.

  She didn’t even care that she was covered in straw and muck. Havyn shot John a smile. “I’m so glad you’re here. I don’t know what we would have done without you. Not just now, but all these weeks.”

  He looked at her, his dark eyes full of an emotion she couldn’t decipher. �
��Havyn . . .” He let out a long breath. “I know you have so much going on with your family, and with your mother sick, your grandfather laid up, and all the responsibilities around here. But there’s something that I have to tell you.”

  All she could manage was a nod. She wiped her hands off on her apron to keep them busy. Her stomach felt like it was turning flips inside her.

  “I know I don’t have any right to tell you this . . . we haven’t courted or anything. And you might think this is completely improper, but I can’t hold it in any longer. I have come to care for you a great deal.” He reached for her hands.

  There they stood, in the stinky calving shed, possibly the most unromantic of places, still wearing the filth of the birthing, while the new mother cow tenderly cleaned her calf. Havyn’s heart pounded in her chest. “The whole reason I came over was to tell you something similar.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes. In fact, I was determined to tell you because my feelings overwhelmed me. I put the feed bucket down and marched right over. You are an amazing man, John Roselli, and I . . . I love you.”

  “You do?” A huge grin spread over his face.

  “Don’t act so surprised. My sisters have noticed. I thought for sure that you had too.”

  “I admit, I had hopes. But after Whitney found the contract, and then you wouldn’t talk to me for a while . . . I was just thankful when you started speaking to me again. Then I didn’t want to ruin our friendship.”

  “Let’s not talk about all that mess. I don’t care that you signed a contract. I trust you. My love for you is real. I think it’s the best kind of love, because we built it on friendship. Don’t you?”

  “I do.” He pulled her closer. “Havyn Powell, I love you too. You have captured my heart completely, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. As soon as I can, I want to ask your grandfather for your hand in marriage.”

  A light laugh bubbled up. “That would make me the happiest girl alive.” She threw her arms around his neck and hugged him.

  Strong arms wrapped around her waist and held her for several seconds. It was the most incredible moment of her life. Feelings she didn’t even realize she could have filled her being. Now she understood the love Mama held for Dad—why she had put up with so much and kept loving him. This feeling . . .